You sound like you know what you want, and that's a great thing at your age. However, may I suggest you don't close yourself off to experiences you have not had yet, or allow entire pathways of gay sexuality to be eliminated permanently.  Though monogamy is a dream of heaven for many, the reality in the gay world is that it seldom works out - not saying it wouldn't for you, but at 54 my husband and I have noticed over our 27 years together that the couples we know who have been together longest are NOT monogamous sexually.  I will tell you that I am completely EMOTIONALLY monogamous with my husband, and he with me, but we've always allowed for sexual play either together with others or alone with others when our schedules conflict. He's always known I'm much kinkier and like leather scenes and such, and he's happy to have me do that kind of sex play on the nights he's working. It's worked out well for us.  Keep in mind a dom top daddy might WANT to see you with others. Whatever comes about - enjoy yourself and your sexuality and whatever experiences you have... one of life's great pleasures!

No I completely agree with you and it is not simply that I am closed off but at the stage I am at I have not arrived to an area or reached enough experience with this side of me to be open to having multiple partners for raw encounters at least. And as I stated in my intro of my new blog.... I will dive more into my truest and deepest fantasy that whole cover a wide range. But I do appreciate your input and I greatly value it! I simply have yet to meet a man that can show me how to fully enjoy being a gay sub bottom for me to comfortably say that I am willing to fuck anyone haha I mean again if I met a sexy loving dom daddy hubby and as you stated who would love to see me play with others than of course I'd do it for both him and myself. I will explain more in my blog but I do hope you continue to explore and read my content and continue to give me feedback! Thank you so much. For a while I thought maybe no one read this but at least if one person does then I feel comfortable and not so much alone and can find comfort in my search as well as my potential insecurities. As you said I am young and I know what I seek but because I haven't fully experienced what I seek out I am also so nervous.