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Found 9 results

  1. ErosWired

    Dead Man Walking

    Today’s entry is brought to you by the Number 55. 55. Fifty-Five. Half-a-Benjamin-plus-five. Forty-five shy of a century - which is really what gets to the point. Today is my birthday, marking my 55th tour ‘round the Sun. Before any of you reflexively say ‘Happy birthday’, let me save you the trouble - I haven’t had one of those sine number 40, when I acquired a sense of Time, and I now positively dread them since 2014 when I nearly stopped having them. It’s not as simple as a concern about the naked ageism in sexual attraction among gay men - in some ways, that’s unavoidable. The science explains that sexual attraction relies heavily on visual cues that signal sexual readiness, reproductive viability, and robust ability to provide and defend. This is all back-of-the-brain stuff humans have been conditioned to over 50,000 years of selecting successful reproductive partners. The fact that these couplings aren’t going to be reproductive doesn’t matter; the same mechanism are in use. As a result, we like abs. We like muscle tone and taut skin. We gravitate toward hair that isn’t white, and isn’t sparse. These characteristics signal youth, vigor, strength, and sexual virility, and therefore advantage those that have them with extra attractiveness. Which is to say, they principally advantage the young. Not always, of course, and not for everyone. There are plenty of other factors. But where possessing a trait may advantage one man, possessing the opposite may not just not advantage another man, it may actively disadvantage him. Sagging physique, wrinkled skin, grey hair - Time is not kind, and while its effects may be forestalled for a while, it will not be denied. I have a couple of pretty decent profile pics of my ass. I rather like them. So do other people. But they were taken three years ago, and I believe in Truth In Advertising, so I think I’m going to need to replace them soon. I doubt my ass will look as good now. It probably feels better to a Top now than it did three years ago, because I’ve honed my technique, but you can’t see that. “Age is just a number,” some of you say. “You’re as young as you feel.” (I feel ancient.) “Fifty is the new Thirty.” (That would make all the 30-year-olds jailbait.) Sorry, not buying any of that. No matter how we try to whitewash it, there’s a reason there’s a general sense that maturing is a death sentence in terms of the gay lifestyle. It doesn’t matter that I get fucked plenty, or that a subset of men may be attracted to older men - that doesn’t change the fact that I’m now too old to put on certain types of slutty clothes and hang out in certain places; my body simply cannot pull it off. I would look ridiculous, sad, and possibly deranged. But all of that isn’t the big reason 55 is a kick in the teeth now. I suppose every person reaches a point sooner or later, if he lives long enough, where he suddenly realizes that there are only so many birthdays left, and he can count them so easily it startles him. Some men may not hit this reckoning until their 70s - my father has been like that. He turns 80 this year. My father, unlike me, does not have AIDS. For me, the reckoning started in 2014, when I survived the effects of the disease that was once an absolute death sentence. Now, a twentysomething who starts ART early before his immune system is destroyed can enjoy practically a normal lifespan. I wasn’t twentysomething. I didn’t start ART until my immune system was practically erased. I will not be getting that normal life expectancy. How many years I’ll loose, science can’t say yet, studies suggest on the order of 7-9. That points to an age of around 70 when ErosWired Has Left The Building. That means that as of today I can count my coming birthdays on the fingers of three hands, and not all of them will be healthy years, thanks to HIV. In a few years, who knows? Science may find a way to beat the Enemy Virus, and I might get an extension. For now, though, I can’t escape a sense of the inevitable approach if Mortality. Being rejected by a hott muscletwink because you’ve got a little silver in your temples or the crows have stamped their feet around your eyes can give you a taste of it - but at some point you can’t get the taste out of your mouth and you feel like a Dead Man Walking. Yesterday evening I was cleaning the kitchen and I stopped at an apple on the counter. It had been there, uneaten, a good long while. It wasn’t rotten, but it was soft, and the skin had wrinkled and become spotty. I paused for a moment, and looked at it. Then I tossed it. Just sayin’.
  2. So many ads - on bareback and non bareback sites say "looking for guys under 45" or "nobody over 45", or words to that effect, I am generally curious when exactly did 45 become the magic cut off point? It's like 44 has one foot in boyhood and 46 is the fast track to senility. Just saying'....
  3. I was a service man installing, maintaining and repairing commercial HVAC equipment but my boss asked me to do a shopping mall Santa gig for a few Decembers because I was fat, even though I had been poz for half a dozen years thanks to a tough regimen of diet and drug cocktails. At fifty I was still in good shape and could still enjoy sex which was perfect because I'm a Top, even now, at the age of 71, I like to get sucked off and fuck any ass my dick could get hard enough to enter. I didnt fuck too well with condoms so I seldom used them. I fucked poz guys and occasionally had the delight of pumping my pozz jizz up an HIV-virgin ass which gave my dick double the orgasm great feeling of fucking a poz guy or some of the fucks before I tested poz. My doctor had told me that even on my regimen of meds I needed to use condoms because I would still infect bottoms up their asses. I was average height and weighed around 275. I looked like most other masculine blue collar working men my age. Few knew that was gay and fewer knew that I'd just as soon fuck a guy or have him blow me as look at him. My nearly seven-inch cut dick had made many bottoms and versatiles happy. Some had cummed just from getting fucked by me. One December I was paired with a cute little twenty-one-year-old guy with collar-length blond hair named Roger. He looked and acted like any other young adult but as the first couple of nights passed I figured out he was as gay as I am but mostly a bottom. By the time we got to the locker room each night after shutting down the throne area the mall was closed so only employees were there closing up shop for the night, finishing the day's paperwork, cleaning up, etc. Only the janitors and night security guards made an occasional visit to the locker room and the ones that winter were gay or bi. "You like chubbys?" I asked him on the third night as we shucked our outfits in the employees mens locker room when I caught him admiring me. "I'm a 'chaser!" he gushed. "You can suck my cock if you like." I replied as I turned to face him. Being the fairy in heat he was he dropped to his knees sucking my cock into his mouth, his head beneath my beer gut. He gave my cut meat excellent head while humming in delight, swallowed my load, sucked off of my cock and kissed it and my balls. My dick felt good in his mouth and he said I shot a nice load which he enjoyed swallowing. I knew I needed to poz his ass if he hadnt been pozzed yet. That night near morning my morning piss hardon throbbed so I had to masturbate to get it to soften enough to take a piss. I had dreamed I was ready to knock off a piece of Roger and was just entering him to give him a golden enema when I awoke. The gig was for three weeks so I decided to save his ass for sometime during the last week so he wouldnt get the "AIDS flu" before it ended. The last week finally came. I had been letting him suck my cock and orally service my feet every two or three days and had squatted on his face to let him rim me a couple of times. "We're going to a motel for the anal." I told him, because anal is more involved and harder to stop and get in order should anyone walk into the locker room. I was horny as hell and was thinking of the extacy of fucking Roger and infecting him with my poz sperms and how utterly fantastic my dick would feel when I shot them off inside him. We drove to the cheap hourly motel that also catered to whores and johns, parked and got a room. Once the door was locked behind us I started with us stripping. We had already seen each other nude so there wasnt any need to explore or do any other pre-foreplay. He sucked my semi-hard dick to full hardness and lay on his stomach on the bed. "Put a pillow under your crotch, need to raise your ass alittle." I ordered him. He obeyed and spread his legs while I finished greasing-up my loggerhead. I spat on his asshole, mounted him, lined up my shot and entered him as he flinched a little. "You keep your hole nice and tight. I like that." I told him after hilting myself in his snug warm hole. I fucked him good, varying my tempo and stroke. I wanted to wear his hole out and rough it up inside good so my HIV would enter his bloodstream easier and quicker. I sometimes fucked slowly, sometimes slammed it with fat-shaking snaps of my hips which also put some pain to him. Had he been a virgin he'd have been beside himself in pain and I'd be doing my best to hold him in place under me so I could get the piece of his ass he owed me. As it was, his virginity was lost history and he liked taking a good fucking. After ten minutes or so I was satisfied I'd tore him up inside enough to facilitate passage of my virus into his system. Four years before I'd fucked one neg hole taking it easy and later found out I failed to knock that asshole up. Since then I either rammed a finger up the bottoms' asses to cut their rectums with a fingernail or worked my dick at various angles and thrusts while the lube dried up in their holes to get them ready to take my virus. I pulled my dick almost all the way out to check for blood on it. There was some so I was satisfied I'd pozz him. I slammed it home and piston-thrust-fucked him to orgasm. My dick was in seventh heaven when I blasted my dangerous virus-laden cum deep into him. I was beside myself in rapture and how absolutely great my dick felt with each spurt of my charged cum in his torn rectum. Thinking of how he would feel within the next month added to my sense of conquest and orgasmic enjoyment as I thrust again and again to pump every last disease-carrying sperm cell into that punk. I liked the respect and friendliness Roger showed me but I also loved how great my dick felt infecting him with my poison cum, that I was the stud who would change his life forever by taking my pleasure in him because he was foolish and neglectful enough to think I was neg and not bother to ask my status. I kept thrusting to grind my HIV-laden sperm cells through his rectal walls into his bloodstream, partly because my dick still felt great with each thrust as well as how great I felt infecting him by enjoying fucking him. A few minutes later I rested on his back, my dick still mostly hard inside his ass, occasionally thrusting in it. I decided I'd reload and fuck him again. I used to reload in half an hour when I was Roger's age but at fifty it took just over an hour to reload and come again. Roger was able to take my weight on his back for the entire hour. I took a short nap of maybe half an hour after we shot the shit and traded first time stories and then talked again when I woke up. The hour passed and my dick was still just hard enough to remain in his ass. I began taking very short strokes to re-harden it and slowly increased my stroke until I was fully hard. I then fucked him, mainly varying my stroke and tempo in order to nut since I usually take longer to bust a second nut. I got my urge after about fifteen to twenty minutes of fucking, fucked him into the bed, slowed alittle and pumped a nice feeling second orgasm of infected semen into him. My second orgasm felt just about as great as my first one. As before, I thrust until I was spent and rested again. I could tell Roger was uncomfortable after nearly two hours under my meaty weight. I pulled out of him, dismounted, stood beside the bed and waited for him to get his fucked ass up and suck my dick clean. He got up and seemed to feel in pain, partly from being under me but also in his ass. I smiled to myself as he knelt and took my spent weapon in his mouth and sucked on it for awhile. He sucked off of it leaving it clean and dry, as several men he had serviced had taught him to do. He kissed it and my balls like they were his lover on a date and stood up. "Merry Christmas Roger. Hope you enjoy the gift." I said joyfully. He thanked me and went to the bathroom to take a piss and I could see very little cum with just a tinge of blood leaking out of his hole. I wanted to also give him a drink of warm beer on tap or give his face a golden shower but he wasnt into that. I started getting dressed and he began getting dressed after pissing. I told him he was a good piece of ass I enjoyed fucking but didnt mention how much I enjoyed pumping my HIV into him. He told me how great getting fucked by me was and that he wished he knew more masculine older fat men. The rest of that last week saw me taking him to the motel two more times to enjoy fucking him some more. The gig then ended with us hugging nude in the locker room showers, him blowing me in the shower, us hugging again, getting dressed, hugging and going home, him to his place where he still lived with his parents and me to my apartment. We did keep in touch mainly because he had his regular job in a store in town. One day after work when I made a weekly stop to pick up something for a couple of bucks I saw he wasnt there. I asked about him and another clerk said he was sick with a bad flu. I told the clerk to wish him well as I took my change and receipt. I stopped in successive weeks and saw him a month and a half later. He looked tired and not too happy. I asked him if he saw a doctor. He said he did, was tested and how he cried when the doctor said he had the HIV. My dick sprang to attention in my work pants which were fortunately loose enough to hide it. I wished him the best of luck with his new regimen but never told him I was the stud who'd knocked him up. Once I got home I went into the bathroom, dropped my pants and masturbated my rock-hard weapon, shooting a load of poz cum into the bathroom sink. I then got a beer out of the fridge and celebrated another penis-pleasing conquest. A couple of my poz buddies who were around my age and I usually went to a bar once a week to discuss sex and if any of us pozzed someone during the week. One of them had also pozzed someone so we three toasted our success. Tom said his orgasm in a forty year old felt "mighty fine" and that his dick got hard when he found out he'd infected the guy. Tony, a versatile I had pozzed a few years before, sucked Tom and me off and kissed our cocks and balls to reward us for jobs well done.
  4. I've noticed that over the past few years, my nipples are pretty much my primary sexual organ - i've become a total titpig. Pretty much any kind of rough treatment on my nipples and i crumble into a pre-cum soaked clut, who will do anything with anyone. I can;t be the okay pig like this? It's literally like my clit (usually locked, and want to get smaller) and my cunt are playing second fiddle to my nipples.
  5. Hi guys! To TOPS: what age bottoms do you like to fuck? You can participate in the poll or just list your preferred age range as a post.
  6. I did a search on this, but got no result, so forgive me if this has already been answered somewhere. How old is the oldest bareback porn actor currently (or recently) working? I'm curious to know if there's a glass age ceiling in the industry, or if in this world where there's nothing that doesn't turn somebody on, the camera is age-blind. I suspect the camera is almost entirely a youth-worshipping little bitch, but I could be wrong.
  7. I know this is going to sound like a trivial question, but I've seen it enough times that it's got me curious enough to ask. Browsing through profiles on BBRT, I've seen a few guys who have their ages listed as 86. Now, it would be pretty impressive to see an 86 year old on BBRT (I think the oldest I've ever seen for real is 74), but it's obvious based on their pictures that they are nowhere near 86 years old. In fact, a guy who fucked me once who is in his late 30's has his age listed as 86. It has me wondering... Is this a code for something that I'm not aware of? It's just so weird that several guys have that exact same age listed, which they're clearly not, and it makes me wonder why. Anyone know what this means?
  8. Hey guys, is anyone on here into ageplay? It seems most people who are into this either like being or like taking care of adult babies. That is not really how I express it, when I go into that role my age varies from as young as 8-10 to as old as 17-18. Anyone else feel similar to that?
  9. I had been diagnosed when I was forty five, The virus had been circulating for about a decade and the doctor said I must have had it for about four or five years according to the tests that were available back then. He cautioned me about barebacking and asked me if I took it up my ass. I have always been a total Top so I had no idea how I could have caught it. He put me on the crude cocktails available at the time and told me to use condoms when fucking someone. I tried condoms a few times but I barely got off and failed to cum a couple of times so I decided to bare-fuck poz guys so as not to risk infecting neg guys. I went and got a biohazard tattoo just above my pubes where any potential partner would see it. One day I decided to try pozzing someone although I had unwittingly done so before my diagnosis. Other poz men had told me how much more intense and enjoyable their orgasms felt when shooting their dirty cum up a neg ass and the great-feeling thrill of fucking up someone's life by fucking him bareback and cumming in him. One suggested I give it a try and another said there were bug-chasers looking for us gift-givers. I went cruising. Part of the problem was finding someone willing to please a somewhat fat geeky/nerdy looking blue-collar working man with dirty nails in his mid-forties who wore old-type hornrim glasses. I was still husky and strong due to my job in maintenance at the plant and adhering to my regimen of taking my meds so I looked as masculine as I was. I went to a couple of sex clubs as well as bars. One guy I scored was just out of college, an aspiring yuppie. I convinced him to go with me to the cheap hourly motel where he didnt seem to notice my tattoo or didnt care to ask. He looked good, sort of like a gym bunny as well as a clean cut young man roughly half my age. "Suck my dick." I told him. He did and I got hard. "I'm gonna pump my first load up your ass." I then told him after I nearly gagged him with a couple of thrusts in his mouth. He opened wide and pulled his mouth off my hard throbbing dick leaving it wet with his spit. I got some soap to add to his spit, as it would be rougher in his hole than the usual grease or water based lubes while still providing enough lube for my dick's comfort. I had him lay on his stomach on the bed and spread his legs. I spat on his hole, mounted him, lined up my shot and shoved it in. "Ow!" he yelped as I forced my dickhead through his sphincters and on up his ass until I was laying on his back, my dick buried in his neg hole. I then began fucking his nice tight hole. He said I was the fifth man to fuck him, the seventh time he got fucked because two of the men had fucked him twice. "I like a nice tight hole, makes my dick feel good." I said, not mentioning how much better it would feel once I injected my AIDS-seed into him. I fucked his ass good while he endured the pain I was enjoying pumping into his sore ass. I felt like the powerful studly man I was conquering someone who was less than a man. I fucked him faster, harder, wanting to both tear him up inside as well as get my rocks off quick. My dick was feeling good and I knew I had roughened his rectum enough to facilitate passage of my dirty deadly virus into him. I piston-thrust in him, reached my point of no return and let my loins take over pounding him into the bed and ejaculating in him, my dick feeling excellent pulsing with pleasure as I pumped powerful spurts of HIV-laden spunk into his sore hole. I thrust again, sending more of my dirty poz jizz into him, feeling the most pleasure I'd felt since my first piece of virgin when I was in college. Knowing he was feeling nothing but pain and humiliation at being used like a woman added to my enjoyment of manhood as well as the thrill of using my hard horny penis as a weapon to permanently infect him with my nasty seed. I thrust a few more times while he whined, then I rested on his back catching my breath, my dick hilted in his ass. I lay on him enjoying the afterfuck, my dick still feeling great knowing my sperms were carrying my horrible virus into his bloodstream through his torn abused rectum. I was able to flex my dick in him feeling my powerful manliness like a fighter flexing his muscles after knocking out his opponent in the second round. 'When are you gonna pull out?" he asked. "A few more minutes." I replied, not mentioning how I wanted my dick to remain in him to keep forcing my cum and virus into his rectal walls. I then thrust a number of times, as my dick was still decently hard. Finally satiated, I pulled slowly out. He mentioned that at least I didnt go ahead and yank it out like some studs did. I didnt mention that I pulled out slowly in order to keep as much of my AIDS-carrying cum inside him as possible. I dismounted and stood beside the bed. I noticed his cum on the bedsheet when he got up. He may have hated the fuck I enjoyed putting to him, or simply acted like he hated it, but the tell-tale cum from his dick betrayed him, it meant that he actually enjoyed my studmanship and my using him for my sexual pleasure. "Ok, suck it clean." I told him. He gave me a stupid look but realized that I was bigger, heavier and stronger than him so he obeyed, almost wanting to vomit but nonetheless he did a decent job of sucking my dick clean. He didnt kiss my dick which had torn him up inside and piped my disease-carrying sperms into him nor my balls which had supplied those sperms that carried my life-changing virus into him. Simply put, I had a ball emptying my balls into him. We got dressed and checked out. That would be the last I'd see of him for a few years. I bragged to a poz buddy about my conquest which had him rubbing his hardening dick through his pants. He said, "Well he was queer enough to want it and you're man enough to put it to him. Pleasure to your penis and pain to the punk, I always say." before hugging and french kissing me. I hugged and french kissed him back, two masculine studs sharing man to man affection celebrating our conquests of neg bottoms and bug-chasers. I saw my conquest half a dozen years later. He had not taken his meds properly and looked ravaged from the disease that I (and no doubt other studs) had pumped into him. I myself was still in decent shape, having stuck to my meds regimen. I asked him to suck me off but he declined. No great loss, there were other holes to be had.
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