Taking Loads From Ud Partner?

[lioilk]

Hi everyone,

 

 

I got a simple question for you. I'm engaged in serodiscordant relationship ( neg bottom here). We fuck bare together. My partner has been undetectable for almost 18 months. The last step before total bareback for us, is me taking his load up into my ass,which I damn want.

 

How risky is it?

 

Are some of you in serodiscordant relationships and taking loads from their UD partner and are still neg?

 

Thanks guys.

[swansub]

Well I've always loved BB but because of other health reasons don't want to become HIV+. For that reason I've stuck to rubbered sex for the last couple of years which I find unsatisfying - at the end of the day I want the tops load up my arse. After doing as much research as I could (mainly thanks to information on this site) I decided that the safest way for me to fuck BB was to find myself an undetectable guy. I got chatting with a guy online a couple of weeks ago and after a while he said upfront that he was HIV+ but has been undetectable for six years, got checked regularly, never misses his meds and he gave me his count figures etc. which I checked out - again thanks to information and links found here. Anyway, getting to the point, we hooked up last week and we hit it off straight away, although he's nearly half my age. We fucked BB and I realized why I loved it so much, there's just no comparison. He didn't give me his load because he wanted me to think about it. I've got to admit that although I'm not a chaser and he's undetectable it was a major turn on when he first slid his Poz cock in me and I know for definite I'll be taking my first Poz next week and can't wait. Before meeting I'd decided that undetectable was much less risky that 'Neg' and if I should find myself Poz then I'd have no one to blame but myself and would have to deal with it. After that first BB fuck I'm happy that I've made the right decision. 

 

I guess the same reasoning applies to yourself. Only you can decide if it's worth the risk but from the information I've been able to gather I believe the risk of getting HIV from an undetectable guy is the same as getting it when fucking BB using a condom and if those odds are correct then it's worth the risk to be able to have a guy unload in me. But as I said, that applies to me. I hope others will be along who can help you more but more importantly I hope you make the decision that's right for you. At the end of the day it has to be YOUR decision and it's not an easy one to make.

[piercedslut]

It would be safer if you were on PrEP lioilk, as there is still a risk even with undetectable.

 

Remember undetectable means there is less than a certain number of copies of the virus per mL of BLOOD, not semen.

 

At the end of the day it is your decision and you have to weigh up the risk yourself.

[seaguy]

When I spoke with my doctor your situation was one of the scenarios he said he would recommend PrEP for and he is a gay man too.

 

The other thing you want to consider is when someone tells you they are undetectable are they being honest.  If you on this site I am sure you have seen the stories of deception and lies some fictional some claim to be non fiction so really the safest bet is to go on PrEP that way if your being misled you have some protection against getting HIV.  I would hope someone would not be deceptive like that but people are fucked up sometimes.

[rtpbbcub]

Risk free, no. Low risk, extremely so. In fact, you are most likely a greater risk to him than he could possibly be to you.

The nature of HIV healthcare is such that he is getting a constant stream of hard data about all aspects of his health. Compared to the average "healthy person" (who doesn't even manage a yearly physical, sees a doctor every few years for a cold, and otherwise only has an occasional HIV test) the likelihood of you giving him something (assuming that you are not a sexually monogamous couple) is far more likely.

[fskn]

There is essentially no risk, as long as your HIV-positive partner really does maintain an undetectable viral load. (This means regular medical visits, scrupulous adherence to his drug regimen, and open communication between the two of you.)

Preliminary results from the PARTNER study showed not a single HIV transmission from condomless sex between partners in sero-discordant relationships, provided that the HIV-positive partner maintained an undetectable viral load.

http://mobile.aidsmap.com/No-one-with-an-undetectable-viral-load-gay-or-heterosexual-transmits-HIV-in-first-two-years-of-PARTNER-study/page/2832748

[lioilk]

Thank you guys for these first insights and answers. I do appreciate your recommendations about me having to think hard about this decision. My partner and I have been together for 3years now, and he hands me over all his blood results and take his Atripla pill every night. Still,your answers show me that the "undetectable" status should not be taken for that granted, as taking his load can still be dangerous.

 

Are there more members here being in the same situation willing to give a few words about their own experience regarding their UD partner ejaculating inside them?

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

pre PrEP I tended to serosort with poz undet. You mate has been on meds at least 3 years. Partner study suggests your risk is so close to zero as to be a non issue. Go bare, don't regret it.

[Guest 120DaysofSodom]

I never caught when getting bbed regularly from undetectable partners. It would be a good idea for any bb bttm to get on prep though.

[bearbandit]

Undetectable varies from lab to lab, hospital to hospital. I've seen u/d be under 20 and under 70, and remember when u/d was considered to be under 400. As has been pointed out the viral load in cum tends to be higher than in blood (hence the 6 month rule that you can't be really sure till after that time).

On the PARTNER study no-one has seroconverted and they consider <200 to be undetectable. Someone here said that the lowest VL they know of someone having and infecting someone was 385: most doctors tend to agree that a VL of 1,000 is the absolute minimum required to establish a "successful" infection.

To be as sure as anyone can be, take the belt and braces approach and go on PrEP: it's intended for guys in exactly your situation...

[gawen]

So it is a bit more safe to fuck but never cum inside even if you are undectable?

[lioilk]

Any more advice on the question?

[wood]

So it is a bit more safe to fuck but never cum inside even if you are undectable?

I mean sure.... but whats the point? 

 

in other news took 5 UD loads from a good FB yesterday 

[nekofox]

The studies have been shown where being with an undetectable partner is actually ok, compared to those that simply don't know.  While the risk of getting infected is low, that doesn't mean it won't happen.   Like all of the others have been saying, go on PrEP to get the risk to be reduced even more.  It'll be like (from what I can figure out), going from a 95% chance of remaining neg, to up to 98%.   Chances are really good nowadays, but there's always going to be that one window, so if possible, go on PrEP to help yourself.