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You Like Danger, Don't You


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(late 90's)

I look back now and wished I'd taken better advantage of my youth. I was in my 20's and did absolutely nothing social. I was creative if you gave me a pen and paper but if you plopped me down in a gathering of friends, I was quiet and boring. The only contact I had with other people was at work or with my friend Troy. I only had a friendship with him because he'd foisted it upon me. He lived on the same floor of the my apartment building and absolutely refused to be ignored. He was flamboyantly gay and figured out I was closeted pretty early on. We forced me to interact with him no matter how cold my attitude was. I started to like him. No sexual attraction at all, but he had a good heart. He was throwing himself a birthday party at a club downtown, and not going was out of the question. I'd never been to a gay bar before, but there was just no way out of it. 

So on that Friday bight, I dressed up a little and went to this place called "Jax". I hated it at first. Everybody knew each other and everybody was having fun. I almost walked right back out, but Troy had already seen me. I was the first of his guests to arrive. I walked over to where he was sitting and sat across from him. 

"No.No. Sit next to me. Be my arm candy. This has always been my favorite table because you can see everyone that walks in. You're early. God! You really don't know anything, do you? Never come early or right on time to a party, Les! The bartender is delivering a pitcher of beer and some shots. I was going to drink it all as a warm-up, but I'll share."

"Happy birthday, Troy."

"Thank you, Sweetie. Than you for the card as well. Nobody sends birthday cards anymore...the only ones I got were from you and my mom."

The club was starting to fill up, but only about three more of his invitees came.  We all sat on the same side of the table because Troy didn't want anybody blocking his view of the action. We drank a lot. I wasn't really used to alcohol but had a high tolerance for it somehow. Metabolism? Anyway, the party was pretty much a bust. The other "friends" blew kisses and left for other hot spots. I stayed because I figured my friend would be too wasted to get himself home. 

"Dumb queens. Who needs 'em? Thank you for staying, Les. I know how much you hate it here, Means a lot."

And then a small group of guy in robes and pajamas blustered through the front door. Weird.

"Ugh. Another pajama party. Those are getting way too common these days. Oh God, that bald guy is carrying a teddy bear. Look."

"What do they do at a pajama party?"

"They all go club to club in their PJ's and then back to somebody's place to have a group fuck or something. I refuse to go to one. I sleep in the buff anyway. Oh no!"

"What?"

"The Ripper is among them."

"The what? Who?"

"See that guy with the curly reddish-brown hair and beard? The really tall one? That's The Ripper."

"Why is he called that?"

"It fits. You take him to your place and he rips your rectum and then rips your valuables. Rips condoms. Rips you completely."

"He looks harmless." 

"Oh God, Les, Don't even get curious. I shouldn't have said anything."

"Why?"

"Because you're an innocent oddball who's a prime target for people like him. You are his type."

"But I don't even have any valuables."

"You have your health and your life. He's got the recipe."

'The Recipe' was the his code for HIV. 

""How do know all this?"

"Darling, I know everyone in this town. I see all. Be right back...I'm going to find a nice normal guy for you. Stay here."

He left. I immediately looked over at Ripper only to find he was already looking at me. Shit! This is why I never socialized...too many landmines. He was kind of handsome, though. 

Troy came with more shots, a stack of napkins and a pen. "I saw you look over there. Stop. Have a drink and draw me some cartoons."

I was an amateur cartoonist and liked to draw for other people. I wasn't published. I drew really raunchy 'toons that I knew Troy would like. I liked making him laugh. We had more drinks and more fun. Every time I glanced over at Ripper, he was still looking at me. 

"I saw that, Les. Stop. Keep drawing. Oh look! Here's Barry!"

One of Troy's friends had shown up late for the party. They exchanged hugs and kisses...which got more intimate. They were both drunk. They full on made out right there at the table. 

"Barry and I are going to dance now, Stay put and keep drawing. I'll be back."

But he never came back. He had vanished. Well, good for him. He was going to get a birthday fuck. Oh well. I had drank so much, but didn't feel intoxicated. Maybe it was my Scottish ancestry. I should probably go too, but the presence of Ripper kept me in my chair. Most of his little PJ party had moved on, leaving him all alone. I looked at him again and smiled. He returned the smile and nodded. Landmine. The bartender came by and asked if I needed anything. I ordered two vodka tonics because I didn't want him thinking I was by myself. I put one of them about a foot away from me in order to keep up the illusion I wasn't a single loser. Ripper was alone now. What a weird thing to see a grown man in his pajamas siting alone. I should go say 'hi' or something. I downed the first drink and  shamelessly grabbed the seconf, trying to decide what I should do. I didn't have to. He came over to me and plopped a teddy bear right in front of me.

"Hi. This guy needs a new home. My friend Josh left this behind. Can I sit?"

"Thanks. Yes. Absolutely.'

"I'm Craig, What happened to your friend?"

Hi Craig. I'm Les. I think my buddy got lucky. Can I buy you a drink?"

"Sure, Wow. You've been sucking down the booze all night...are you sure you want any more?"

"I'm cold sober for whatever reason. Or maybe not. My drawing are getting a little sloppy, I'll have one more and call it a night."

"You come to a beer and DRAW?? No offense, but that's weird. Can I look?" He shuffled through my cartoons and smiled.

"What happened to the pajama party"

"Who knows? They're all flakes. I get abandoned by those guys regularly. Its just us now. Can I sit closer to you?"

I patted Troy's empty stool and he was right next to me. 

"So I guess your pal told you all about me."

"He's a gossip, but, yeah -- he told me some stuff."'

"Guys like him are the reason I can't get laid anymore. Fucker."

"Any of it true."

"Of course not. I just pissed off somebody once and they spread rumors to ruin me."

"Sorry. It seemed dubious to me. You seem nice."

"Really? Thanks. I've never seen you out before. New in town?"

"No. This just isn't my scene. I hate crowds."

"Well, it's not crowded now. Let's have another round and go back to my place. I wouldn't ask to go back to yours because I don't want you to think I'd rob you." But he lived way North of the city, and I didn't want to drive that far.

We drank more. 

"I like you, Craig." Maybe the alcohol was starting to affect me. He reached over, took my hand and stuck it down the front of his pajama pants. I felt the biggest erection in the world. It was hot and a little moist.

"You seem normal, but you like danger. I can tell."

"Oh, hell. Everything you heard is true. I admit it. Can you admit it turned you on?"

"I can."

What turns you on most? That I can ruin assholes? That I sabotage condoms? That my cum is poisonous? That I'm a criminal?"

"All of the above."

"Good. Let's go. I promise if we go back to your place, I won't take anything that's not mine."

We left and got to my apartment. He took off his slippers and t-shirt. OK. This was happening now. He waited for me to do something. I stripped. 

"Danger. You're in the danger zone now, boy. Lie down here on the floor."

I did and he collapsed on top of me. We kissed long and hard as he humped me. I grabbed that infamous boner again. Dear Lord.

"Got a condom? You realize I'll tear it off at some point, but we can pretend for a bit if you want."

"Are you really HIV+?"

"Oh yeah. And it's potent. No meds can make it go away. You wanted danger and now it's aimed right for your ass."

He spit on his fingers and massaged two of them into my hole. 

"This will hurt and make you bleed like crazy. You'll have to get an area rug for this carpet."

"Rip me."

That set him off and shoved that thing nearly half way into me. I wanted to scream, but he held one of his huge hands over my mouth.

"You're lucky that it's been so long for me. I'll  cum soon. Hang on. Here's what you wanted. Ahhhh. Shittt!"

I was in severe pain and could feel my ruined anus bleeding. He was done. The Ripper had completed his task. We lie there together for a minute.

"Mind if I spend the night? I've already got my pajamas here."

"Let's go to bed."

It was a nice night. He let me suck him and we fucked twice more. 

He let himself out that Saturday morning. I spent the whole day in bed, listening to my body. It was wrecked and full of bad cum. I needed to find him again.

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