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Tops: Online Profiles - What Seals The Deal?


ErosWired

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As a total bottom, what goes on in a Top's mind has always been a matter of deep curiosity to me. I mean, whatever it is, I'm glad it does, but I want to cater to it and I'm never sure I'm doing it right.

Of course, every Top is an individual with individual tastes, but nevertheless I want to ask this question and see if a consensus emerges.

Tops, when you're looking through the vast sea of bottom profiles on the apps and websites, which ones stop you in your tracks, and why? What do they say that makes you go, "I've got to have some of that." What makes you choose that one above all the other choices you have?

Think hard - I'm not really looking for what turns away from a profile - that's a different question. I want to know what the successful profiles do that grabs you by the cock and won't let go. What seals the deal for you?

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Guest daddyloadny

If I see a beautiful bubble butt on all fours with a nice lat spread - I'm in.

I like having something to hold on while I am thrusting.

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2 hours ago, ErosWired said:

So it’s all about the pics? What about the text? Is there anything you men read in a profile that decides you? Or am I just naive to think that anybody actually reads what’s written in a profile?

My general profile advice.

Standards are sexy.  Don't say stuff like "Will take ANY raw cock!"  I know you're a slut.  You're on a hookup site.  We're all sluts.  But geez, at least try to make me feel like you find me somewhat attractive.  (Note:  don't be too obnoxious with this.  For example, if you're a size queen, it's OK to say so.  But insisting that only men with 9+ inches fuck you is unrealistic unless you're an A-list porn star.)

Try not to come across as a greedy, needy bottom.  The last thing I want to hear from you is "Do you have any friends who are also tops you can bring?"  Remember:  we're getting into this scene for BOTH of us.  Also, demanding the top show up RIGHT NOW or it's off forecloses on the possibility of sex in the future.  Not smart.

Read my profile.  Think of that first contact as kinda like putting in a job application.  You want to show that you'd be a good fit for the top (pun very much intended).  So, my profiles usually say, "I tend to go for guys between 30 and 60."  If you're outside that age range, you might say something like, "I know you don't usually go for guys my age, but we really line up when it comes to X, Y and Z."  That sort of thing.

Be specific in your own profile.  If your first message is a job application, your profile is your resume.  For example, I've often seen 50-something guys say "I'm only into younger guys."  What does that mean?  I'm in my mid-40s, so I'm younger than you.  Or do you mean guys in their 20s?  If you have a preference, state it clearly.  It will help us find each other.  Having and expressing your preferences shows me that you have standards, which is sexy.  If you don't have any standards at all, then you're probably beneath mine.  And a profile full of "Ask Me's" gets ignored.

Not really germane to the question, but a couple pet peeves:

1) Don't ghost.  If something comes up, something comes up.  I'll understand.  And I'll appreciate knowing whether or not to expect this to go forward.

2) If I hit you up and you can't or don't want to hook up, please have the courtesy to tell me.  And let me know if you not interested at all, or if you'd like to hook up but can't right now, so I know if I should hit you up later or not.

3) Be truthful.  Have up to date pics.  Include your true HIV status.  Have your accurate age, dick size, and other stats.  Also, if you are using drugs of any kind, please be very honest and up front about that (as in tell me in your first message, even if I don't ask).  Lots of guys out there are recovering from drug problems (myself included) and it can be incredibly dangerous to walk into a situation where they are or have been present (even if you put them away...trust me, I know what you've been up to).

 

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Agree with PhoenixGeoff above but would add that negativity in profiles comes off bad. Some guys list a whole bunch of "No" items without mentioning any positives or things they like. Making the profile read like a shopping list of wants also puts people off because you think that if you don't match all the requirements then you'll rejected. 

I'll also skip profiles that are largely blank or contain lots of "Ask Me" entries. 

In terms of the text, if I see someone's copied in that bit of text you sometimes see about "Goventment institutions may not use this profile for research or...." then I'm thinking this person is part of the tin foil hat brigade and best avoided. The cut & paste of BDSM test results also isn't interesting. Write something original that makes you stand out from the rest. Every time I read something in a profile that has made me smile or laugh, I've messaged the guy to say so, and it's a great icebreaker. 

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Guest gwmcatcher

Thank you ErosWired for starting an important thread! 

A lot of us have been asking this question of ourselves for sometime.  You put it in writing.  Look forward to many answers. 

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17 hours ago, PhoenixGeoff said:

Try not to come across as a greedy, needy bottom.  The last thing I want to hear from you is "Do you have any friends who are also tops you can bring?" 

Yes.  I get this from bottoms on Grindr all the time.  While I think it's hot that you're willing to take on multiple tops, and I agree that tag teams and groups can be hot, if you immediately ask me to put in the effort to find other tops when I don't know if we have chemistry or if I don't know if you'll even show up, then I'll likely stop responding and go find someone else.

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On 10/2/2018 at 2:48 AM, AirmaxAndy said:

Agree with PhoenixGeoff above but would add that negativity in profiles comes off bad. Some guys list a whole bunch of "No" items without mentioning any positives or things they like. Making the profile read like a shopping list of wants also puts people off because you think that if you don't match all the requirements then you'll rejected.

Excellent point.  My advice here would be, be positive about what you do like rather than negative about what you don't.  Be realistic about the kind of men out there, or expect that you'll only get laid once in a blue moon.  And show flexibility.

I also strongly suggest stepping outside your comfort zone sexually now and then.  If you're a total bottom, fuck a guy.  If you're a total top, take a load.  If you've only ever been with white guys, hook up with someone of a different race.  Or an age that's outside you're usual comfort zone.  Or a different body type.  Hit up someone who's into a particular kink and say, "I've never done that before, would you be willing to show me the ropes?" 

Learn to appreciate all of the wonderful sexual diversity out there.  Hell, you might even consider fucking a woman just to see what it's like.

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Bit different for me. Bottom's profile I usually consider are those where the bottom clearly describes himself as insatiable cumdump. I want you to show me you're a fucking slut. You better be a no loads refused kind of guy, ready to take on multiple dicks.

I want to hear your hunger for cum, your lust for dicks. I want to know I am going to fuck a greedy whore, ready to do anything to please me and others. 

If you top that with a cum leaking mancunt pic, then you're surely going to catch my attention.

Make me want to breed you slut!

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