Guest ThirstyVers Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 I spent yesterday morning with a gym buddy and occasional fuck buddy of mine. He's a gold star barebacker who'd considered PrEP but ended up seroconverting about half a year ago before he could get a prescription. At first he took it pretty hard but he's come to embrace it. While we were getting our weights in he let slip that a guy recently asked him to charge him up and he obliged. That made me pretty fucking horny and it wasn't long before we were back at his place with his cock deep in my ass. Fast forward to the shower and he casually asked me if I had any interest in becoming poz. He hasn't started on meds yet but he wants to in the near future...but while there's a use for his detectable viral load... I confessed that it's been a growing fantasy for me, but that I'd need some time to think it over. I woke up rock hard this morning and immediately got to cranking it. My cock was leaking precum like crazy and my ass was (for lack of a good description) needy. My hesitation returned once I'd blown my load, but while I was running errands I got to thinking about it again and ended up having to jerk off in a grocery store bathroom. Is this normal? Is there some kind of continuum for this? It used to be I only had these desires once in a blue moon, but now they're popping up fast and not just when I'm aroused. My doctor is straight and straight-laced, so I doubt if he'd do anything other than refer me to a psychologist. The same could be said of my friends, but maybe I need some harsh, judgmental intervention. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punaman Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 Just remember, once you get HIV, you've got it for life. No turning back, so make sure that is what you want. The thrill is there yes, but the reality might not be. 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannee52 Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 I used to crave my Poz friends loads....then I would think about it and back away. Finally I decided just to let nature take its course. I bottomed for anyone who wanted me. For 3 years I took load after load raw....many I knew were both, others I didn’t know their status....then I became Poz....have never regretted it 5 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbw1174 Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 I had a good friend help me convert, that was in 2000, I have never regretted it one single minute 3 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evilqueerpig Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 If you decide to go through with it, you need to stop PrEP and make sure it's out of your system...also discuss it with your friend to see if he'll wait to go on meds...not meant to influence your decision, just a bit of friendly advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Cumlaut Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 (edited) 13 hours ago, Dannee52 said: For 3 years I took aloud after load raw....many I knew were both Usually I find broken English sexy but im having trouble popping a boner from your autoincorrect. Edited October 8, 2018 by Cumlaut Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garsento Posted November 8, 2018 Report Share Posted November 8, 2018 I have played bare with many HIV-positive people, up to and including the point of them cumming inside me, and I have never gotten the impression from them that they wanted to be HIV-positive. They were certainly willing to take whatever advantage that they could from their status, God knows it cost them enough, but I do not think they ever wanted that. I can get the thrill of this to some extent. Whenever I fuck with HIV-positive people, I do so knowing that science has made it safe, that something that cast a pall over my entire sex life has been defeated, and it's nice to do that. If I get a naughty thrill, frankly, that has more to do with what I am doing with who than what their status is. Your mileage may vary. Just keep in mind that, unless there's stunning advances, any choice you'd make would be a permanent one that would cost you significantly. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chargedodger Posted November 11, 2018 Report Share Posted November 11, 2018 On 10/7/2018 at 10:06 PM, ThirstyVers said: I spent yesterday morning with a gym buddy and occasional fuck buddy of mine. He's a gold star barebacker who'd considered PrEP but ended up seroconverting about half a year ago before he could get a prescription. At first he took it pretty hard but he's come to embrace it. While we were getting our weights in he let slip that a guy recently asked him to charge him up and he obliged. That made me pretty fucking horny and it wasn't long before we were back at his place with his cock deep in my ass. Fast forward to the shower and he casually asked me if I had any interest in becoming poz. He hasn't started on meds yet but he wants to in the near future...but while there's a use for his detectable viral load... I confessed that it's been a growing fantasy for me, but that I'd need some time to think it over. I woke up rock hard this morning and immediately got to cranking it. My cock was leaking precum like crazy and my ass was (for lack of a good description) needy. My hesitation returned once I'd blown my load, but while I was running errands I got to thinking about it again and ended up having to jerk off in a grocery store bathroom. Is this normal? Is there some kind of continuum for this? It used to be I only had these desires once in a blue moon, but now they're popping up fast and not just when I'm aroused. My doctor is straight and straight-laced, so I doubt if he'd do anything other than refer me to a psychologist. The same could be said of my friends, but maybe I need some harsh, judgmental intervention. I think this is cute!:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HardOneLA Posted November 12, 2018 Report Share Posted November 12, 2018 Hey bud, I don't think it's a question of "normal" or not, per se. Seems we've spent much of our life living on the edge, being risky. Fear of being outed when we were not out; fear of being caught or arrested when having sex, like in bathrooms, parks, cars, etc; fear of AIDs in the 80's and 90's. So to me your concern is appropriate. Like you, when my horns come out "I need it, must get it" and pursue it until I do. Often afterwards I would worry, "Did I convert? Was he poz?" And also like you, so many times when I was "in heat" I'd end up watching hot porn or something, jerk off, and then the feeling would pass and I'd be "safe" for a while until I came into heat again. I recently started PrEP so now am actively pursuing cocks, denying myself cumming (which is not that hard for a hungry bottom), and less concerned. I think a lot of us live with fantasies of the sex partner we want, the partner, the whole scenario. And then it always boils down to getting a good fuck and being bred and we're back in reality again. Oink! 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BBBoyfromTN Posted December 3, 2018 Report Share Posted December 3, 2018 I think part of it is subconsciously wanting to take "control" over a situation you really have no control over. If you bareback and are neg and not on Prep then you know its only a matter of time before you'll become poz. In a way gatting poz is getting all of that out of the way. To me it's never been the death sentence it was for guys who came up in the 80's and 90's. I can't even pretend to know what that was like. For me it's always been a manageable disease and Prep came along while I was in HS, so it isn't as scary as it must have been. That said its some bad shit and people do die from it. But Prep is doing a lot to stop the spread of it. I beg folks not already on Prep to get on it if they're sexually active and especially if they bareback. I would suggest thinking about getting pozzed very long and hard before you do it. Maybe visit a counselor or drop in on an poz support group and get a sense of the issues guys (and its mostly guys) are dealing with. It's some deep shit. I have had my share of guys wanting me to poz them and I will do it...I just have no idea WHY they want to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GoneFishing Posted December 3, 2018 Report Share Posted December 3, 2018 On 10/8/2018 at 2:57 AM, Dannee52 said: I used to crave my Poz friends loads....then I would think about it and back away. Finally I decided just to let nature take its course. I bottomed for anyone who wanted me. For 3 years I took load after load raw....many I knew were both, others I didn’t know their status....then I became Poz....have never regretted it DITT☣️❗️ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
POZdetectable Posted December 4, 2018 Report Share Posted December 4, 2018 I chased it... and now... i share... with people who deserve it... 2 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ejaculaTe Posted December 6, 2018 Report Share Posted December 6, 2018 On 12/2/2018 at 8:43 PM, BBBoyfromTN said: To me it's never been the death sentence it was for guys who came up in the 80's and 90's. I can't even pretend to know what that was like. Here's an example of what life was like then: In the mid-90s, my supervisor, R, had progressed from being HIV+ to having full-blown AIDS. At some point in 1994 or '95, his t-cell count went to zero. You didn't have to be a rocket scientist to know that his time was running out. The Monday after Thanksgiving 1995, his mother called me, asking if I had seen R or heard from him that day. When I said I hadn't, she asked me to go to R's apartment and check on him. A co-worker and I went to his apartment; the maintenance man let us in. R was on the bathroom floor, having died sometime Thanksgiving weekend. Every Thanksgiving I say a prayer and a toast in his memory. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beanna Posted December 13, 2018 Report Share Posted December 13, 2018 On 12/4/2018 at 11:29 AM, POZdetectable said: I chased it... and now... i share... with people who deserve it... I deserve it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leatherman667 Posted December 13, 2018 Report Share Posted December 13, 2018 On 12/4/2018 at 12:29 PM, POZdetectable said: I chased it... and now... i share... with people who deserve it... Good. Have you converted anyone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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