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Is there something wrong with me?


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13 hours ago, Spokaneboy said:

So how do I go about finding a top that doesn’t have anything? Not sure I’d want a rubber even if there is an increased risk... I want to be a good boy and take what is given as it’s a turn on thinking about it

You shoul do what You can to prevent STD's as much as possible, check my post:

 

 

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Guest Memphian

I can identify with the OP. I was married to a woman when I first sucked cock and later, bottomed.  I consider myself bi because I still love pussy and I’m not really attracted to men  as in, I don’t see a guy and think “He’s hot,“  but show me a hard  cock, no matter who it is attached to, and I want it in my ass.

I get off on being used and fucked like a whore, but have no desire for a romantic relationship with a man.  

I do find that I am preferring cock over pussy the last couple of years, so perhaps I’m moving more towards the homosexual end of the Kinsey spectrum  

But I think labels are silly anyway.  I know what I like and it’s not important to me to catagorize it.

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19 minutes ago, Memphian said:

I can identify with the OP. I was married to a woman when I first sucked cock and later, bottomed.  I consider myself bi because I still love pussy and I’m not really attracted to men  as in, I don’t see a guy and think “He’s hot,“  but show me a hard  cock, no matter who it is attached to, and I want it in my ass.

I get off on being used and fucked like a whore, but have no desire for a romantic relationship with a man.  

I do find that I am preferring cock over pussy the last couple of years, so perhaps I’m moving more towards the homosexual end of the Kinsey spectrum  

But I think labels are silly anyway.  I know what I like and it’s not important to me to catagorize it.

Oh Fuck Yes !  You and I are on the same page - do not care if I am called a Whore - can not refuse a Hard Dick - addicted - No Refusal ! My Dream is having Gang Banging Poz guys with Tattoos - Poz Daddies - wrecking my cunt hole - strapped down - getting high - prepping my cunt hole to bleed blood - video taping me - booty bump my cunt - be wonderful making it a weekend activities !    :)   Anyone else gets a erection looking at Poz Tattoos ?

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Guest Memphian
5 minutes ago, ronnie4u said:

Oh Fuck Yes !  You and I are on the same page - do not care if I am called a Whore - can not refuse a Hard Dick - addicted - No Refusal ! My Dream is having Gang Banging Poz guys with Tattoos - Poz Daddies - wrecking my cunt hole - strapped down - getting high - prepping my cunt hole to bleed blood - video taping me - booty bump my cunt - be wonderful making it a weekend activities !    :)   Anyone else gets a erection looking at Poz Tattoos ?

Gets me hard too. I haven’t seen any such tats since I became a committed barebacker but if I do I know it will put me in heat for his powerful cock. 

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Guest takingdeepanal
1 hour ago, Memphian said:

I can identify with the OP. I was married to a woman when I first sucked cock and later, bottomed.  I consider myself bi because I still love pussy and I’m not really attracted to men  as in, I don’t see a guy and think “He’s hot,“  but show me a hard  cock, no matter who it is attached to, and I want it in my ass.

I get off on being used and fucked like a whore, but have no desire for a romantic relationship with a man.  

I do find that I am preferring cock over pussy the last couple of years, so perhaps I’m moving more towards the homosexual end of the Kinsey spectrum  

But I think labels are silly anyway.  I know what I like and it’s not important to me to catagorize it.

 

1 hour ago, ronnie4u said:

Oh Fuck Yes !  You and I are on the same page - do not care if I am called a Whore - can not refuse a Hard Dick - addicted - No Refusal ! My Dream is having Gang Banging Poz guys with Tattoos - Poz Daddies - wrecking my cunt hole - strapped down - getting high - prepping my cunt hole to bleed blood - video taping me - booty bump my cunt - be wonderful making it a weekend activities !    :)   Anyone else gets a erection looking at Poz Tattoos ?

 

1 hour ago, Memphian said:

Gets me hard too. I haven’t seen any such tats since I became a committed barebacker but if I do I know it will put me in heat for his powerful cock. 

Yes to all of the above, and preferably cut cock - don't have to use my hands, and it feels better. 

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  • 2 months later...
Guest CuriousDallas

No, there is nothing wrong with you. A lot of straight and bi guys have the same thoughts you do. I’m essentially bi and I had and have those thoughts. I acted on them as do many other guys in your situation. Many don’t. It’s a tough choice. If you act on it you’re opening a door you can’t close again...in fact the door, the hinges, and the doorknob are gone too! I found that out and there is no putting that genie back in the bottle. That said, if you don’t act on it you’ll be constantly be tortured by the thoughts and how different things may be had you acted. Looks will fade as you age and it’ll be harder to find guys to try it out if you decide you want to try it. Regret is a hard thing to live with. But being gay or bi is NOT easy. It isn’t a choice. You’re born that way and you can try and fight it or deny it but it’s still there. In some respects I wish I wasn’t the way I am but I can’t change who I am. I can try fighting it and wind up hating myself and making myself miserable or I can do what I’ve been doing and try being real to being who I am and pursuing what I desire. It hasn’t been easy and sometimes scary but it’s revealing who I truly am and finding unexpected pleasure. 

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  • 1 month later...
  • 1 month later...

Glad you enjoy hanging out at this site. 💪

Nothing wrong with you. Healthy curiosity and a sexual appetite are natural. And perhaps part of the enjoyment is that we're all men here, no judgements as at some level we're all brothers. 

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Nothing wrong with being bi or gay. It started out for me just looking at pictures of guys in underwear pic's when I was a teen , then I got married at 19 and when she would go to her parents out of town all I would think about is what it would be like to suck a cock. After about a year I couldn't stand it and went down to a park where gay men would hang out in cars and give and receive blow jobs. For me that's all it took and I was off and running. I was divorced from her about six months later but was afraid to admit to anyone I was bi or gay and lived a life of lies for the next seven years. I was remarried and spending a lot of time at the ABS having sex with other men then going home and lying about what I was doing, it was the worst time of my life. I remember the night I came out to her figuring the marriage would be over. To make a long story short were still married today and that was thirty seven years ago. For me there was nothing worse than lying to someone you care deeply about.   

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 3/6/2019 at 11:50 PM, Spokaneboy said:

I guess I consider my self a straight man with a bit of bi curiousity. I am a married man and have a beautiful wife that has a bigger sexual appetite then I do, so guess I shouldn’t have any complaints. Being a married guy with a gorgeous wife I shouldn’t be thinking about cocks and cum, yet I do. I’m not really attracted to guys but can’t stop thinking about cock, and how I wish I was being stuffed by a giant one. The bigger the better making me submit to a real man making me a fuck hole for him. I don’t know why I am having these thought and when I do look at porn I gravitate towards the gay and transgender types of porn, not the straight kind that a married man should be watching. I do enjoy this site more then I should and appreciate any feedback. What do you guys thing, is there something wrong with me and what should I do about these thoughts?

For a long time, I regarded myself as a “straight man who nevertheless had a fascination/liking for sex with other men”.

I genuinely didn’t regard myself as sexually attracted to other men and I resisted the urge to have sex with other men from my early teens until my mid-to-late 20s; even after I finally followed through with my desire to try sex with a man when I was 25 and thoroughly enjoyed it.

It took me years to even get comfortable with the notion that I was bisexual TBH despite the fact that I was very honest with myself about why I’d wanted to experiment with gay sex and what it was about the experience, having loved the sheer maleness of the sex with a young muscle escort and his boyfriend (after several false starts including one with the same muscle escort the night before I finally went through with it).

That was over 20 years ago and it’s only in (say) the last 5-10 years I’ve truly become, not only happy with the physical sexual side of my enjoyment of other men, but I’ve grown to realise that I really am physically attracted to other men.

Indeed, while I still regard myself as bisexual, there’s no doubt in my mind that, whereas I once considered myself “bisexual but predominantly attracted to women”, I’d now argue that I’m predominantly attracted to men more of the time than I’m attracted to women. I still have moments when my primary attraction is to women and I’ll look at the female form in preference to the male form but these days, I mostly look at male bodies, lust after men and think about having sex with men.

In my case, my reluctance to accept the gay side of my sexual character was pretty easy to work out. First, I just didn’t want to be sexually attracted to other men; being gay or bi was, well, just “gay”.

Secondly, I always regarded myself as what an ex of mine (a very gay young ex I might add) always described as “psychologically heterosexual but sexually very homosexual”; he was only 16 or 17 when he first told me of his self-analysis. In other words, Alex preferred the company of women to men, especially to gay men, in every way except his unambiguous sexuality (of which he was almost absurdly certain from a very young age; he was actively ‘escorting’ before I first met him when he was nearly 17.

I’d always used the phrase, “attitudinally heterosexual” and was bisexual only in the sense that I enjoyed being fucked silly by men to describe my interpretation of my sexuality.

But I am quite a blokey bloke - highly rational and very capable of divorcing my thought processes from my emotions - and, to be honest, have always had an issue with relating to effeminate men. I still find it very difficult to relate to them even nowadays; that’s after a long journey of self-realisation, I finally ‘get’ my sexuality and, indeed, relish in it.

Obviously I don’t know you well enough to tell you what underlies your difficulty in reconciling these seemingly conflicting feelings.

But I’d hazard a guess that it’s possibly something similar. Perhaps you subconsciously see your masculinity and sexual submissiveness as somehow contradictory? Or perhaps you’re more like my young friend, Alex, in that he sees his character and mode of thought as more akin to the women in his life but accepts the fact that he lusts after cock as an entirely separate matter?

(Apologies for having  gone on so long in trying to reply. I hope it gives you some food for thought.)

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On 3/6/2019 at 10:06 AM, find91 said:

Nothing is wrong with you. This may sound weird but liking cock does not necessarily mean you are gay or Bi. You may simply like the idea of being penetrated and this is how you connect to your passive side. There are a lot of straight yes I said straight guys that are into getting pegged by their wife's and have no interest in pursuing a relationship that being sexual or romantic with another man. You really have to ask yourself why does taking a big cock such an appealing idea to you? Is your non attraction to men more based on stigma or an actually non sexual attraction to men. These questions will not be answered in a day and you don't have to declare or state the answers to anyone but yourself. My point is You might be Bi you might not. You need to do some soul searching to answer that question for yourself. All that being said as a Bi man myself I understand your dilemma concerning your wife. Any decision you make concerning that with have their positive and negative consequences, just make sure if you really do love her you do have to factor in her health and well being in your decision as well.

PERFECTLY said!

Anal stimulation has been known to give guys pleasure due to the prostate being hit, whether that's with a toy, penis, or perhaps finger.  Therefore, that could be your desire to having big cocks in you,

 

On 3/6/2019 at 10:34 AM, tallslenderguy said:

i see a conflict between "...can't stop thinking about cock" and "....just occasionally satisfy my desires."  i was married (to a woman) and was having sex with guys for years. For me, i was from a religious background where being gay was considered a sickness and "sin."  Took me awhile to work through all of that and come to a place of self acceptance.

Personally, i cannot recommend a life of lying and cheating. 

Marriage is a significant relationship, if you keep this part of you secret, you will end up feeling alone and unknown in the most significant relationship you have. Didn't work for me.

PERFECT!

I'm a different story.  While I attended church, I portrayed myself being straight and outside of church, I hooked up.  I have several friends who are quite religious, who I hid my sexuality from.  I at points in my life, I was selectively out as bi to people I trusted (even to my future g-f, wife, and now ex-wife).  Her rule was play it safe with guys and don't give her anything.

Eventually, I had enough of the lies to myself and realized that I was never bi or straight but always was gay and faked who I was and lived a lie. 

Outside of the relationship with my ex-wife, I never slept with a dude while dating or sleeping with a female.  Yet, at same point, I withheld my attraction to guys which is lying.

On 3/6/2019 at 7:50 AM, Spokaneboy said:

I guess I consider my self a straight man with a bit of bi curiousity. I am a married man and have a beautiful wife that has a bigger sexual appetite then I do, so guess I shouldn’t have any complaints. Being a married guy with a gorgeous wife I shouldn’t be thinking about cocks and cum, yet I do. I’m not really attracted to guys but can’t stop thinking about cock, and how I wish I was being stuffed by a giant one. The bigger the better making me submit to a real man making me a fuck hole for him. I don’t know why I am having these thought and when I do look at porn I gravitate towards the gay and transgender types of porn, not the straight kind that a married man should be watching. I do enjoy this site more then I should and appreciate any feedback. What do you guys thing, is there something wrong with me and what should I do about these thoughts?

Straight girls or lesbians have been known to watch MMF or MM porn,  Thus a straight watching trans, gay, or bi porn shouldn't be a problem.  May be an issue of watching something a tad taboo or out there which can often be harmless.

Nothing is wrong with you.  You're human. 

You ask what you should do about your thoughts, think long and hard of the highly probable negative consequences of  your acting on your thoughts.  You sure love yourself and your wife enough that I'd hope you wouldn't risk an STI or hIV.

 

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