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I must be doing something wrong...Need your help!


TxCowboyCub

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Okay, here is the scoop. I have my profiles on several different sites (barebackrt.com/ adam4adam.com/NastyKinkPigs.com/grindr/growlr/scruff) No one is remotely interested in doing anything, chatting, fucking, nothing period.  I even posted an ad on 2 different sites for having fun on my birthday...I am spending it alone. ..No one , not 1 person responded. My ego is becoming shattered here as well as my pride of being a gay man, I am becoming depressed and about to pull and delete all profiles.  I have the same exact profile on each site. Can someone clue me in as to I am doing wrong,? Am I just an ugly / monster/ ogre/ old man/ unattractive/ too honest ? Somebody please tell me what the fuck is up with that!  I am truly starting to  take it personally and it hurts honestly.

Please give me your constructive criticism or advice. I have gone as much as 3 or even 4 months without being with someone for a hook-up .  And a date? try 4 years.  HELP!

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Don't fret it..  It's the way of hookup sites anymore.. Most are looking for just that one perfect guy and sit online for 24 hours a day 7 days a week waiting for just that one to come along.  There are a handful online that are just out to fuck.  I have also gone for months without a hookup from online and even my usual fuck buddies say they are always busy.  There are times I go down to club Houston and get nada.. Just depends on how the moon and stars are aligned..

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Do you answer ads or just wait for someone to answer yours? Be proactive if not, you make the first step, you may go through many profiles before finding one that will actually respond and hook up.  Maybe change your ad up if if's not working.  If not, then go out to the baths, parks or clubs

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I'm sorry to hear that. I'll chime in same as the others, the hookup apps are pretty lame a lot of the time, especially if you're a familiar face (not new to the area) and if you're not right in a heavily populated area.

If it makes you feel any better, I'd play with you in a heartbeat if I weren't 1500 miles away.

Get out and get a social life... the people you meet that way are usually better bets, anyway.

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Hey hot men, thank you for all of your responses, your support and advice. I will try to answer all your questions here in this one response.  Do I take the initiative? Yes most of the time.  If I just log in and wait for someone to contact me first, I will be in my grave before I get any responses! LOL!  Most of the times that I do chat or get a person to play is when I have started the conversation first.  I live in the heart of the city and would love to go to the baths here but unfortunately the bathhouse that Austin had closed and as far as I can see no plans for another one. I find it shocking that the capital of the state of Tx, one of the 4 major cities in Tx does not have a bathhouse.  So you guys that have local access to one are quite lucky. The bar scene here in Austin, well to me ,is less than desired as well.  Overall Austin has approx 4 to 5 gay bars. They are all pretty much designated to certain jaundras. One is a bear/so called leather bar, the other a twink bar, one is a drag bar, and one where daddies go to pick up little boys.  All but one are located in the downtown area of Austin where parking is so very hard to find. You can drive around for an hour trying to get a parking spot.  Eventually you get frustrated and give up. The one bar that was loved by most Hot barebacking leather masculine men closed 5 years ago and  left a giant void for socialization for many gay men.  It was easy to find, good parking and was always packed with hot men and I never had a problem finding fun. So over the years things have really changed as I guess it has in every city.  I try to keep my profile fresh and updated most of the time, swapping out pics, rewording , editing but that seems to make no difference either.  When I lived in Dallas, I never had a problem I could have had fun 3 or 4 times a day if I wanted. But thanks for all of your replies. Location is everything apparently!

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  • 1 year later...
  • 1 month later...

Sometime a demographic/type just doesn't work in a particular location/region. I couldn't get laid for a whole semester as a slim fit 20 years old in Ames, Iowa. Moved to San Francisco and had a body count of 100 next year, easily.

Perhaps try playing with the location settings on some apps? i'm sure there are places where you'll be worship.

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Guest PlanetJunk

Hey I understand how you feel. That happens most of the time for me as well. Heck even happened to me here since I've been posting and asking for help and asking questions but nobody has taken their time out to actually even speak to me either so I definitely understand. At least you did get responses. Yes bitter party of one. Sorry for hijacking the thread.

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  • 4 weeks later...

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