Making the choice to take Prep

[plutonium239]

I dont know if this topic has been previously opened by someonw in the forum, but, i'd like to express my personal opinion about the topic I'm posting and, obviously, I' d like to read other fellow barebackers' points of view. And as stated,  I am talking about what led you to make the decision to start Prep.

In my case, Prep was totally unknown until I was living in Philadelphia, that was about 10 years ago. Barebacking has been, since the first time I had sex, that was around my early 20's, (Take into account that I am almost 40), a very common sexual practice which I enjoy a lot because I believe It's a natural thing among human beings regardless of their sexual orientation.  My first sex (and gay) experience was bareback, but I was afraid of an illness, so my sex life was very limited to protected encounters. This changed during my journey in the US where I finally accepted myself as a gay man, that gayness isnt the terrible thing my church preaches (Mormonism). that AIDS is not the end of anyone's life, and the arise of the Prep era.

Putting these things together, my beliefs about sex, my religious background and who I am, Barebacking started to be a regular part for my sex life, making my sexual hook ups enjoyable, with plenty of lust, skipping the use of rubbers and taking and giving shots as much as possible, knowing that I was always on risk of taking HIV or other sexual disease.. 

This is the part which dislikes about BB because I have never wanted to get infected and in this area Prep takes a very central place of the discussion, because this is the way I found on other to continue enjoying of my sexual encounters, 1 -1 or with more guys at the same time, but I wanted to start taking Prep but I had no insurance and my cash flow couldnt afford it. 

This situation is now over because now I am covered by the health care system of my country (Colombia) and I will apply for Prep soon.  I am planning to follow the directions 'till the day I meet the guy I am dreaming with: Versatile, Barebacker, Fetichist, Taller than mine, muscular, nice endowment and ass, smart, tender, HIV + and into recreational drugs for sex. That day i will write the last page of my Prep journey because I want the only one I chose to give me his gift so that we can swap strains regularly.

Here my two cents and I want to read yours.

Guillermo . (Colombia South America)

[drscorpio]

I have been bareback only since the early 90s. I was always mostly bottom, but I have been exclusively bottom since the late 90s. By that time, I was not actively chasing, but I was also not doing much to avoid poz loads. I had accepted that I would poz up at some point, but I was not going out looking for poz guys even if all I was doing to protect myself was asking "I'm neg, are you?"

I met my future husband in 2005. He was a hot redneck with 8x6 cut who fucked like a demon. We became monogamous after a couple of weeks, and we both tested negative. We were completely monogamous for 6 years. This worked well for us because he was almost exclusively top. Honestly, it was all I could do to keep up with his sex drive. We got legally married in California in 2008 in the time before Prop 8 passed. 

Eventually, we both started craving a little fresh meat. When we started talking about opening up, he said, "Please don't make me wear a rubber." I told him I was cool with him fucking other people bare as long as I was allowed to take it bare and take loads. He was a little hesitant but agreed that was only fair. We started having threesomes and foursomes, and eventually we gave each other permission to play alone. 

[My husband had lost his first lover to AIDS in the mid 80s. They had moved to San Francisco hoping some doctor there could help him. His lover died a few moths after they arrived, and he spent years working with AIDS related charities. He took care of many men in the last stages whose family and friends had abandoned them. Because of all of this, he was very worried about me contracting HIV. He didn't want to have to bury another man.]

Very soon, my husband realized that he really got off on watching other men breed me and then fucking my cummy hole. I would often wake up on Saturday to find he had been on the apps and sites since early morning and set up several guys to breed me. He seemed content to serosort through asking "are you neg?" I knew this wasn't good protection for me/us, but I didn't really mind. Like I said before, I had already made peace with the thought of getting pozzed. 

In the summer of 2013, I was diagnosed with syphilis. It was in the second stage, so who knows when I contracted it. He suddenly got terrified that I had also pozzed. He started pushing for me to go on PrEP. It took several months for various reasons I have talked about on here before, but I started PrEP in early 2014. It was the only thing that allowed him to relax enough to let us enjoy our open sex life. He went on it a couple of months later. 

That's where I have been for several years now. I believe that PrEP is a good thing. It is the only way a cumdump bottom can expect to remain HIV-. I say this even if I was on it mostly for my husband's comfort.  

My husband recently passed away very unexpectedly (recently enough that this is my first time mentioning it on here). My first thought was to flush all my Truvada. But I have decided that the conventional wisdom of waiting a while before making life-changing decisions applied to this one.

I am glad we have PrEP. I fully support everyone who is on it. I also understand and support those who choose not to be. 

[melvin0095]

1 hour ago, drscorpio said:

I have been bareback only since the early 90s. I was always mostly bottom, but I have been exclusively bottom since the late 90s. By that time, I was not actively chasing, but I was also not doing much to avoid poz loads. I had accepted that I would poz up at some point, but I was not going out looking for poz guys even if all I was doing to protect myself was asking "I'm neg, are you?"

I met my future husband in 2005. He was a hot redneck with 8x6 cut who fucked like a demon. We became monogamous after a couple of weeks, and we both tested negative. We were completely monogamous for 6 years. This worked well for us because he was almost exclusively top. Honestly, it was all I could do to keep up with his sex drive. We got legally married in California in 2008 in the time before Prop 8 passed. 

Eventually, we both started craving a little fresh meat. When we started talking about opening up, he said, "Please don't make me wear a rubber." I told him I was cool with him fucking other people bare as long as I was allowed to take it bare and take loads. He was a little hesitant but agreed that was only fair. We started having threesomes and foursomes, and eventually we gave each other permission to play alone. 

[My husband had lost his first lover to AIDS in the mid 80s. They had moved to San Francisco hoping some doctor there could help him. His lover died a few moths after they arrived, and he spent years working with AIDS related charities. He took care of many men in the last stages whose family and friends had abandoned them. Because of all of this, he was very worried about me contracting HIV. He didn't want to have to bury another man.]

Very soon, my husband realized that he really got off on watching other men breed me and then fucking my cummy hole. I would often wake up on Saturday to find he had been on the apps and sites since early morning and set up several guys to breed me. He seemed content to serosort through asking "are you neg?" I knew this wasn't good protection for me/us, but I didn't really mind. Like I said before, I had already made peace with the thought of getting pozzed. 

In the summer of 2013, I was diagnosed with syphilis. It was in the second stage, so who knows when I contracted it. He suddenly got terrified that I had also pozzed. He started pushing for me to go on PrEP. It took several months for various reasons I have talked about on here before, but I started PrEP in early 2014. It was the only thing that allowed him to relax enough to let us enjoy our open sex life. He went on it a couple of months later. 

That's where I have been for several years now. I believe that PrEP is a good thing. It is the only way a cumdump bottom can expect to remain HIV-. I say this even if I was on it mostly for my husband's comfort.  

My husband recently passed away very unexpectedly (recently enough that this is my first time mentioning it on here). My first thought was to flush all my Truvada. But I have decided that the conventional wisdom of waiting a while before making life-changing decisions applied to this one.

I am glad we have PrEP. I fully support everyone who is on it. I also understand and support those who choose not to be. 

Sorry for your loss.

[Guest FinalDL2021]

I was fantasizing alot about chasing, and the fantasy of getting converted.  After awhile, this mind-set really got me to thinking what becoming POZ would really be like for me, on a regular, day to day bases. Not so much about dying, but the management, the doctor visits, the side-effects of the meds etc.

I realized that the reality did not seem that great for me. I said "lets face it, just getting older is having a big enough impact on my active lifestyle, I could not imagine what other health issues would have.

[Kimberley]

My first time being fucked was bareback and then i immediately was addicted to bareback sex and wanted more and more but i knew i was take big risk for HIV. it always holded me back because the fear of getting pozzed up. ive read back in 2012 or something there was prep for protecting youself for HIV but that was only in the US and there was no chance it was going to be in Europe soon. then suddenly the healtcare in Amsterdam was did a research about prep use and was seeking for active gay and bi-sexual men that was interrested to use prep. I did not change my mind for a second and i immediately made an appointment with the healtcare and so it began for me