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Would you mislead a bugchaser?


ErosWired

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This question isn’t actually pro-bugchasing, and is targeted at non-chasers, so I’m asking it in this part of the forum.

 If you are Undetectable and on ART and are propositioned by a bugchaser who has seen that you are HIV+ and wants to be exposed to your “toxic fluids”, would you encourage and go along with his fetish in order to get the fuck even though you know that U=U and it’s not possible for you to transmit the virus to him? Or do you explain that you’re Undetectable on meds and aren’t “toxic” and potentially miss a fuck but score another point against Poz-stigma?

 If you wouldn’t mislead him, would you just say “Sorry, bro” and leave it at that, or would you suggest to him that he look into getting on PrEP and explain the reality of having the virus?

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4 minutes ago, ErosWired said:

This question isn’t actually pro-bugchasing, and is targeted at non-chasers, so I’m asking it in this part of the forum.

 If you are Undetectable and on ART and are propositioned by a bugchaser who has seen that you are HIV+ and wants to be exposed to your “toxic fluids”, would you encourage and go along with his fetish in order to get the fuck even though you know that U=U and it’s not possible for you to transmit the virus to him? Or do you explain that you’re Undetectable on meds and aren’t “toxic” and potentially miss a fuck but score another point against Poz-stigma?

 If you wouldn’t mislead him, would you just say “Sorry, bro” and leave it at that, or would you suggest to him that he look into getting on PrEP and explain the reality of having the virus?

I would be honest. The specifics would depend on them. I know I got real tired of the Safe Sex Lectures, and I can understand the desire to be Poz. 

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I'd tell him I'm on my meds and I don't plan to be off them anytime soon. At this point in my life, I don't think it's my place to tell people what to do with their bodies and their life. If they want to catch HIV, despite the downsides, then they can go ahead and learn about it themselves.

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I have been hit on by guys that want to fuck because I'm poz. I'll tell them I'm undetectable and they'll come back with something like: "but that means you're still poz, right?" Then, when I check their profile, I find they list their status as "On Prep". I think there are a lot of guys who want the thrill of doing something risky without the actual consequences.  You can be honest about your status, and they will weave it into support for their own fantasy.

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If I were in that group, I'd be inclined to tell them the truth if they actually asked. If they didn't ask, my inclination would be to wait to hear they way they were talking, and then role-play to help them enjoy their fantasy without actually saying anything false. My motivation here is that whether or not I can actually infect them, they are likely to enjoy the sex if they think it's possible, and even if I were detectable poz, their chances (without special preparation) of being infected are less than 1 in 50, so the fantasy is mainly what they'll be getting anyway. If they are serious about chasing, they'll succeed eventually whether or not they have sex with men shooting blanks. It may also take them quite a while (as we've heard from people in this forum who have stayed neg for decades while having bare sex), so I might as well show them a good time in the interim.

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Guest takingdeepanal
13 hours ago, funpozbottom said:

I have been hit on by guys that want to fuck because I'm poz. I'll tell them I'm undetectable and they'll come back with something like: "but that means you're still poz, right?" Then, when I check their profile, I find they list their status as "On Prep". I think there are a lot of guys who want the thrill of doing something risky without the actual consequences.  You can be honest about your status, and they will weave it into support for their own fantasy.

Some guys on PrEP like the fact that they're getting together with a poz guy, irrespective of him being U+. It's a little more non-vanilla that neg guys - and because a U+ guy is taking his meds, it means that he still takes care of his health. Remember: sex is not the only way to contract HIV ...

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i'm a critical care nurse and take care of very sick people everyday, so i am sort of professionally conditioned to try and help people get and stay healthy.  Having said that, one of the first things a healthcare giver does before providing information is assess for willingness and readiness to learn.  

It can be tricky, some people just don't know what they don't know, others make fully informed decisions that are contrary to their health.  i don't want to violate anyones autonomy, to me, that is one of the most immoral acts one can commit. i'm not going to play along with the fantasy, but then, i'm not one for pretend or role play anyway... real is  so much better to me and i am really kinky lol.   But honestly, i wouldn't play along with the fantasy of infecting someone with a potentially deadly virus because is would violate something in me to do so.  i don't want to make anyone sick or harm them. i love Men and that goes against my notion of love.

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Guest Descartes70817

Just like everyone who has commented so far, I am not going to lie just to get laid. I've wasted too much time already educating guys that undetectable means I can't infect them to know that some people are just unteachable, and to be perfectly honest stupid people turn me off completely, regardless of looks.

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