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Falling in love and being slut. Can it be fitted?


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After my ex bf broke up with me two years ago, I decided to live as real bareback cumdump slut. Free, without boundaries. Aside from a literal idiot, I have only sexdates and sex partners in these last two years. I really enjoyed it. 
almost three weeks ago I met this guy in a bareback sex party. As he stood on the bed and had a guy sucked, I caught his sight and the chemistry was working. We sucked each other and he fucked me lot. I stayed there but he had to catch his train to home. While he was dressing up texted me. We are on connection continuously. We met twice. Both were real (I can say traditional) date with many programs including but not only amazing sex. Fortunately he is versatile so we could fuck each other many times. We fit together in age ( he is 42, I am 44), in job (both of us work at a university as a lecturer), etc. I’m not sure, but it seems I’ve felt in love with him and he feels something similar. 
He didn’t ask it and I didn’t promise him not to have sex others but I feel that I don’t want it. 

It’s a very new and strange feeling, that I have never experienced. 

I can’t imagine my future without orgies, three or moresomes, sauna or cruising bar. I always wanted a relationship where my bf wanted to the same: organizing parties, visiting sex places, enjoying when the other has sex with another guys. But now I can think only of him. 

Is there anybody with the same or similar experience?

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The Xian church has been the most destructive force to human relationships but trying to equate sex and Love as being synonymous and pushing sexual monogamy, even though it is the rare exception  among mammals rather than the rule. You can have a whore's life and a loving relationship BUT both of you must be on the same page. The guy met at FWA last year totally by chance turned out to be the Love of my life. He is a sex pig like me and we are both promiscuous. he know I do porn work and has even done camera work on several of my scenes. He is like me and understands sex is a physical animal drive in our male DNA and it has nothing to do with the emotional and spiritual commitment of Love for each other. We have  very easy  going relationship because the cloud of jealousy doesn't hang over it. Thus, ours is not like most relationships, made n the failed Xian mold, which is controlled by  Jealousy of the Outsider construct. We know each other is the most important person in our life and they come first. no matter how many guys we have sex with because it feels fucking awesome to do. Find a guy that secure in himself as a person and be that way yourself and you will have a great life of satisfying your sexual appetite all you need and still have an awesome guy live for. And be honest with guys up front. Anyone who meets me knows I will never do sexual monogamy as it is not a Natural condition for the male to exist in.

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54 minutes ago, MuscledHorse said:

The Xian church has been the most destructive force to human relationships but trying to equate sex and Love as being synonymous and pushing sexual monogamy, even though it is the rare exception  among mammals rather than the rule. You can have a whore's life and a loving relationship BUT both of you must be on the same page. The guy met at FWA last year totally by chance turned out to be the Love of my life. He is a sex pig like me and we are both promiscuous. he know I do porn work and has even done camera work on several of my scenes. He is like me and understands sex is a physical animal drive in our male DNA and it has nothing to do with the emotional and spiritual commitment of Love for each other. We have  very easy  going relationship because the cloud of jealousy doesn't hang over it. Thus, ours is not like most relationships, made n the failed Xian mold, which is controlled by  Jealousy of the Outsider construct. We know each other is the most important person in our life and they come first. no matter how many guys we have sex with because it feels fucking awesome to do. Find a guy that secure in himself as a person and be that way yourself and you will have a great life of satisfying your sexual appetite all you need and still have an awesome guy live for. And be honest with guys up front. Anyone who meets me knows I will never do sexual monogamy as it is not a Natural condition for the male to exist in.

I totally understand your standpoint and also agree with you. I say the same and believe the same. I’m happy for you and I always wanted the same life. I have the desire for a guy like your habit. Therefore, it is strange for me what I feel. I don’t understand, how I can feel that I don’t want sex with others. I have two different theories. First, it is the beginning of this love. The first period, when all my thoughts are about that guy. Hence, I have no time to think of others. Second, it is just the so-called Pavlov reflex. I have grown up in a heteronormative and monogamy centred Environment, and now, when I feel that I found the big one, my brain switched automatically. 

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On 8/5/2020 at 6:37 AM, bareback-flipflop said:

I’m honest, I started with that as a crucial information. 
However, the main question is for me that it is real and how it can be that one person or the emotions towards him repress the desire of being slut. 

The desire to pair-bond with a mate is a real human desire. If you have strong enough feelings of infatuation for someone, they can crowd out your other real human desire to fuck everyone you can. Eventually, the infatuation fades. If you are lucky it deepens into real love. Regardless, that is when people start to stray from their partners. The problem we have in modern society is that we view the urge to stray as a sign the original feelings were mistaken instead of seeing it as a sign that it is time to open the relationship. 

My late husband and I were monogamous for the first 5 or so years. It wasn't a hardship for me because from the first time he came in my ass, I didn't want anyone else. Sex with him was so exciting that I didn't feel the need to take other cock. Eventually, we both started to miss sex with others. Then we opened things up, and enjoyed a happy open relationship until he died. He loved finding men to breed me while he watched and then fucking my cummy hole.  In retrospect, we probably could have opened up earlier, but we were wrapped up in buying a home together and selling our old places for over a year which distracted us from talking about it. 

Talk to him about how you feel. It sounds like you are on the same page in so many ways. 

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3 hours ago, drscorpio said:

The desire to pair-bond with a mate is a real human desire. If you have strong enough feelings of infatuation for someone, they can crowd out your other real human desire to fuck everyone you can. Eventually, the infatuation fades. If you are lucky it deepens into real love. Regardless, that is when people start to stray from their partners. The problem we have in modern society is that we view the urge to stray as a sign the original feelings were mistaken instead of seeing it as a sign that it is time to open the relationship. 

My late husband and I were monogamous for the first 5 or so years. It wasn't a hardship for me because from the first time he came in my ass, I didn't want anyone else. Sex with him was so exciting that I didn't feel the need to take other cock. Eventually, we both started to miss sex with others. Then we opened things up, and enjoyed a happy open relationship until he died. He loved finding men to breed me while he watched and then fucking my cummy hole.  In retrospect, we probably could have opened up earlier, but we were wrapped up in buying a home together and selling our old places for over a year which distracted us from talking about it. 

Talk to him about how you feel. It sounds like you are on the same page in so many ways. 

It sounds so smart and nice. I want a relationship, such like this you described. A relationship, that is based on deep love and intelligence, tolerancy, and mutual understanding. I hope he will be ready to open when I will be. Or vice vers. 
 

At this moment, I feel totally the same that you wrote:

” It wasn't a hardship for me because from the first time he came in my ass, I didn't want anyone else. Sex with him was so exciting that I didn't feel the need to take other cock.” I complete this not only with sex but general. My thoughts are always about him. If my phone signals that a message came, I immediately become excited if he is who texted.

It was almost 20 years ago when I last felt something like that, when I felt in love with my ex boyfriend.

 

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It can be done but it takes openness and honesty from both,. As a cock addicted cumslut for years, it takes a special top that understands my needs. I had that for 13.5 years of my life, but since he moved on - II have discovered that all that hype about tops wanting a slut for their partner is pretty much mythical. 

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On 8/5/2020 at 7:37 AM, bareback-flipflop said:

I’m honest, I started with that as a crucial information. 
However, the main question is for me that it is real and how it can be that one person or the emotions towards him repress the desire of being slut. 

Don't repress. One has your heart. The world has your ass.

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I've been paying attention to this thread and reading the replies because I think about this a lot. I was in an open relationship for over two years with someone and we were both putting out all the time. It was a lot of fun but there were times when I wondered if it could last. We were in love and we still say I love you to each other all the time, but the love is more like a family member than a boyfriend.

Now I'm in a committed relationship with one man but he shares me with his roommates and sometimes other men who stop in. So in a sense I'm still a slut because I love having my ass used by three guys, but at the end of the night I'm going to bed next to my man and waking up in his arms. I've fallen in love with him and would obey him if he said I couldn't ride other dicks, but I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't miss it.

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6 minutes ago, backdoorjimmy said:

I've been paying attention to this thread and reading the replies because I think about this a lot. I was in an open relationship for over two years with someone and we were both putting out all the time. It was a lot of fun but there were times when I wondered if it could last. We were in love and we still say I love you to each other all the time, but the love is more like a family member than a boyfriend.

Now I'm in a committed relationship with one man but he shares me with his roommates and sometimes other men who stop in. So in a sense I'm still a slut because I love having my ass used by three guys, but at the end of the night I'm going to bed next to my man and waking up in his arms. I've fallen in love with him and would obey him if he said I couldn't ride other dicks, but I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't miss it.

 

That is a great way to do things. You get whored out by your owner (or however you want to put it), but at the end of the day, it's only with his approval. Indeed, what could be more bottom that such total submission. You get used like a tramp and slut, but only at the will of another.

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All You replied very important and interesting things. However, almost in all cases, live snd open relationship work together because both parties want it, accept it. I think, I can say, I love that guy and he loves me. But he talks about open relationship like strange, furthermore disgusting option. I can imagine to leave my private adventures but not the adventures together. The question is, who will fit who. I can’t imagine that I will be able to leave in a monogamous relationship for years. Okey, now at the beginning. But I know myself, later I will scratch the walls being so eager for adventures in sauna and cruising bar, for being bred in dark rooms, being gang banged, etc. I lived cheating my boyfriend, lying him late night works. I hated it, and I don’t want it again. Furthermore, we can’t meet too much, only one or two times in a week. Now, my brain is full with him, so I less miss the regular sex, but soon it won’t be enough. 
I hope, I can keep him and my freedom together. 

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You guys met at a bareback sex party.... he must be somewhat interested in the lifestyle you are seeking.  Talk to him, be honest, you might be surprised.

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9 hours ago, Cannation1 said:

You guys met at a bareback sex party.... he must be somewhat interested in the lifestyle you are seeking.  Talk to him, be honest, you might be surprised.

You are right, that moment was what gave me hope. But later he talked about open relationships like something strange and not understandable thing. I fear that he can accept these kind of things only out of a relationship. 

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