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23 i can’t stop wanting to get pozed


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     I honestly don't understand this bizarre urge to get poz, till I was 23 yo I've only done sex with condoms, that was the time I've found out I was poz, my guess and my doctors is I've caught it when I was 14yo (I had a minor condom issue at that time, I was losing my virginity), and what I can tell you it wasn't a fun journey at all.

     Yes it was good to get undetectable and stop freaking out about hiv and bareback feels so much better, but when I started the treatment I had a cd4 of 18, had shingles, pneumonia (the specific type for hiv), and a few days later tuberculosis (which fucked me up good for almost 2 years trying to get back to normal health), I weighted 54kgs and I'm almost 1.80m, I looked way too thin and my face cheeks which used to be very rounded and full became very reduced, they got better, but they still reduced a lot, it's fine for people who don't know me, they will think all is well, but the ones who knew me do notice the difference. I still have the marks of shingles everywhere, they don't leave.

     After getting undetectable I had bareback sex with other poz guy also undetectable, I thought we were coming out clean about our STI's, but he didn't know he had HPV, I've ended up with a wart on my cock (i'm a top), and later on that wart spread even inside my butt (yup, not cool!). To remove both of them I went on 2 surgeries, cock with a normal procedure (electric scalpel) and I'm telling you a scalpel pointed out to your genitals is a horrible feeling (plus the blood on your brief later on), and the other with laser (yes laser inside your ass), it was so many meds and pain killers I had to take, also a diet change.  After a few years I went to my endocrinologist and she asked me to went on hormone therapy for a while, to increase my life quality as my levels were slightly lower (it really did work) and one of her exams some of my bones were developing osteopenia, that's how much of an annoyange hiv can be, with the proper diet, workout and the hormones for about 1 year I've managed to fix it., but it was hard work So if you think getting poz is fun and there is very little dangers with bareback, well, I'm sorry to say, bareback is amazing but it comes with a price,  

Edited by BRAlphaMaster
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  • 6 months later...

I say don't go in it  your turned on by high risk sex and going on prep will take that away  . It's a rush for me taking unknown loads from sleazy guys  I keep pushing myself  ,  trust  me yoy will have the best sex ever now that your not afraid of hiv  it was liberating for  me when I said fuck  it no load refused   and love it  

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 2/22/2021 at 10:59 AM, nefen said:

Thursday, i will receive my first poz load. So excited 🙂

I’m getting my first known poz load in one week. Can’t wait, I’m so excited!

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I would first take Prep & see how you feel after around 6 months at least, you can always stop taking prep if you really want to chase your dreams but if you do go towards the path of becoming HIV+ then you should also make sure you are very well insured medically because you will need a good health insurance that covers for all the future costs which come without saying for lab work, medication, consultation etc etc etc.

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On 2/20/2021 at 3:23 AM, Alexreyez said:

I moved recently to Orlando and have been having been fucking and getting fucked raw the last few months. It’s been so hot and It’s my first time really encountering so many poz men around here. The idea of a real man using me and breeding me and knowing he is poz gets me so hard. Recently got tested and am neg. a part of me wants to just keep fucking like wild and go to the bath house every weekend. On the other hand I’ve been told to get on prep. What do we think ?

Best thing is to get on PrEp and then it doesn’t really matter you can have all the loads in the world, Prep is a wonderful drug, becoming HIV in this day and age isn’t really necessary for anyone. 

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