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My name is Levi. I'm 22 years old and I live alone in a tiny apartment. I keep to myself because it's easier. I've never really been with a guy before and I've definitely never been with a girl. As you can imagine, this has always been a source of frustration for me. Up until a few days ago, I'd been involved with a much older man over the internet. I met him on fetlife a few months back and things have been escalating. Until he ghosted me - I'm sorry to say that's exactly what happened - we had been Skyping every night for several hours at a time, and communicating via text almost constantly. "Daddy" was the role he played for me and he had all kinds of pet names for me. Sure his bark was bigger than his bite, but we still had lots of fun. He was everything I never knew I wanted in a partner. He turned me on to imasculation and forced feminization, self bondage, mental conditioning/brainwashing, and mesochism. He had a fascination with chastity in all of its forms that was rubbing off on me heavily. You'll understand more later, but believe me when I say our conversations got pretty dark. And when you're in the heat of the moment, naked on the floor of your pitch black closet ramming a too-big dildo into your ass sobbing "I love you, Daddy" into your phone, you'll do or say pretty much anything your partner wants you to do. But it didn't last. One day he was just gone. It took me a few days to get the message but I took it hard. Due to a combination of being an introvert and living a relatively sheltered life, I had never really had any sort of romantic attachment to anyone before and I missed him a lot. I was clicking around the internet trying to distract myself and not doing a very good job when a few choice key words led me to an interesting website. "Ivan's artisan adult products," or was called. They had some pretty interesting stuff in stock. Hand-made glass dildos worth hundreds of dollars, home made massage oils and lubes, custom fitted leather restraints, that kind of thing. None of it was cheap. I clicked around idly just admiring what they had when I came across an item description that I had to read a couple of times to really wrap my head around. "Eternal oils - 1oz bottle" "Made from a very rare, expensive oil extracted from the ironwood tree, this single serving of personal lubricant has a permanent and irreversible effect. The user will experience a single, normal orgasm upon reaching his or her climax. Following this, the user will never again be able to achieve an orgasm in his or her life. The user's libido will not be effected. Physical arousal will still take place in both the male and female anatomy, and it will still be possible to 'edge,' but an orgasm will never be experienced again. This product is reserved for most dedicated of submissives, and is the ultimate exercise of chastity." A single ounce of the stuff cost $400. This amazed me. I must have read the description a dozen times. I bookmarked the page. Just thinking about it made me so horny I started shivering. You ever get that? That's the best. I stripped down, went into my kitchen, winced and hissed as I laid down on the freezing tile, and jerked myself off. This was a habit I had been trained with by my former Daddy, and I did it without thinking about it. For the next three days this little bottle of lube was all I could think about. I was masturbating more often than when I was with my Daddy. The third day just happened to be pay day and I pulled the trigger on the stuff without even thinking about it as soon as my deposit hit. Half of me was scoffing at having just spend $400 on an obvious scam, and the other half of me didn't care. Two days later, there was a tiny brown box in the mail. The bottle was tiny. After all it only held an ounce of lube. It was plain, matte black with a golden circle as it's only mark. It sat on my night stand for about a week. I thought about it constantly but for a reason I still can't explain, I had yet to use it Then, one afternoon on my day off, I was in my tiny bathroom relieving myself idly scrolling through my phone. I saw that I had an email from "admin@ivans.com" "Hello! Your recent purchase of one of our more exclusive products is appreciated! Would you be willing to write a brief product review describing you and your partner's experience with the Eternal Oils?" I smiled to myself. Because I wasn't quite done in the restroom yet and I had a minute, I went ahead and typed out a quick reply. "Hello, I actually bought the oil just for myself. I haven't gotten around to using it yet but I'm sure I'll convince myself to try it soon. I'll write back once I do! Is there an form on your website or do you just prefer a follow-up email?" I closed out my phone and didn't think anything more of it. About 45 minutes later I had just made it to the groceries - the first of my errands for the day - when my phone buzzed. I stood off to the side of the cart corral by the door so I wouldn't be in anyone's way and checked it. The email I had received had a completely different tone. "I am on my way to the address you had the oils shipped to. I will arrive at roughly 5pm this evening. Your entire body - excluding your head - will be completely smooth shaven and you will be showered. You will trim and paint your fingernails and toe nails and you will answer the door wearing nothing. I will only knock once." I read the email a few times. I was completely taken aback. Eventually I put the phone down and went about my business but I was walking around the store in a haze. Mostly, I was trying to figure out whether I really believed this person was going to show up at my apartment. And for what exactly? Whatever. I did my thing at the store and got what I came to get, then went home. Business as usual. But damned if there want a package of fresh razors and a bottle of white nail polish in my bags. Somewhere along the line my mind made itself up without telling me. You ever have that happen? You ever try to make a decision then realize it's been decided for you somehow? That's where I was at. I put my groceries away and stepped into the shower. I had never shaved my entire body before but the idea of what I was doing aroused me. I went through the entire four pack of razors and about half a bottle of shave gel. My legs were a challenge. But I was used to shaving my pubic area. The rest was little stuff. I didn't have much arm hair but I got rid of it. Under my arms, my chest, all that good stuff. That went too. I suppose I should tell you I'm about 5'7 and your average young white guy. Although I looked a little young for my age. I wasn't slim but not really chubby either. Soft was probably the best way to describe me. But once my skin was bare and my nails were painted? I went full-on twink. I spent quite a bit of time marveling at myself in the mirror and was tempted to touch myself, but something told me to save it for whatever came - or didn't come - at 5 o'clock. I spent a few minutes tidying up and then spent more time than I thought laying on my couch idly running my hands over my smooth skin. It was new and it felt raw, and it was enough to get me going. But that arousal completely melted away when I heard the knock. Now to be fair, I knew I would freeze up. I was counting on it. But I remembered "him" saying he would only knock once. So I had already prepared myself. I had mentally rehearsed going and opening the door without thinking about it, so I didn't have the chance to psych myself out. That's what I did. He was tall. Over six feet. He was slim but not lanky. He was clean shaven and had a clear complexion but a stern expression in his dark eyes. He carried a small duffel bag. He stepped inside without a word, and I backed up reflexively. He closed the door behind him and turned to face me again. He did nothing to hide the fact that he was inspecting my body very carefully. He stepped closer, moving inside my bubble. He was tall enough to look down on me. I started to speak, but all I got out was "I-" and he put his finger over my lips and shushed me. I flinched when he touched me. "Just don't speak. It will be easier." After a long moment of slack-jawed eye contact on my part, I just nodded. I flinched again when he put his hands on my shoulders. I think he could feel the tension in my body because he frowned just a little bit, then his demeanor changed just enough for me to notice. It was almost like he switched into a lower gear. His face softened and he relaxed his hands and shoulders a little too. He pulled me closer and his right hand slid slowly from my shoulder down to the small of my back. His left traveled around and up my neck, and he cradled my head. I'll never forget the long, slow, wet, breathless kiss that made me melt. All of the apprehension I felt about what was happening disappeared. I didn't even care who this person in my apartment was anymore. My brain was mush. I was just along for the ride. He kissed me for a long time, and I'm sure he knew it was exactly what I needed. I was complete disarmed by the time he was done. When we finally separated I looked up at him and I was ready to give him anything he wanted. He smiled and put his hands on my shoulders again. I felt some slight pressure and he said "down." I took the hint, and got down on my knees. Once I was looking up at him, he smiled and ran his fingers through my hair. "Stay." I had a small table and a freestanding island counter in my dining room/kitchen/living area. I watched him while he placed his bag on the table and began rummaging through it. He lit several small candles and covered the counter top with a big fleece blanket. Once the candles were lit, he went around the apartment turning all the lights off. He came back to me and said "up." I complied right away and I remember being startled by just how easily he picked me up. He laid me so gently onto the shrouded counter top you would have thought I was asleep and he was trying not to wake me. The counter was a little narrow, so I folded my hands across my chest. He went back to his bag and fished out an unmarked brown glass bottle. I watched while he rolled up his sleeves and covered his hands in the liquid. When he first touched me I expected it to be a cold touch, but whatever the liquid was, it was oily and warm. It stuck to my skin as he started with my hips and worked his way up and down my body. I remember thinking it smelled kind of like almonds. It was pretty clear he meant to cover my entire body in this oil. He took special care to work as much of it into my skin as he could rather than just letting it lay. He paid special attention to my upper thighs and my nipples, which felt incredible. I was gasping for breath and I didn't even know why. He also absolutely soaked my cock and balls in the stuff, gently working my shaft up and down with both hands in a loose jerk-and-twist motion that had me ready to blow my top. But as I suspected, he didn't let me cum yet. When he flipped me over and did my back, he paid special attention to my asshole. I expected this but it didn't make it any less amazing. He worked a finger or two inside me for a few moments but it was clear he was getting at something. I just didn't know what it was yet. I gasped, then let out a long, low, moaning sigh as he slid a large, twist-textured glass plug into my ass. As far as I was concerned, it could stay there forever. I don't know when it happened, but at some point he went and found the bottle of Eternal Oils in my bedroom. He placed it on the end table by the couch and picked me up again. He carried me over to the couch where he sat at one end and laid my head against the arm rest at is left arm. My upper body was in his lap, soaking up his warmth. My skin was still slick with whatever he had put on me, and I rubbed my legs together, loving the feeling. "You're beautiful," he said at length. "For you," I replied, my voice low and lazy. He began idly teasing my cock with the fingers of his right hand, and it responded very quickly. I shuddered and took in a sharp breath. I closed my eyes and let out an "mmmmm." "Why do you want this?" It took me a moment to answer. "Because I deserve it. I wasn't good enough." "For your Daddy?" "Yes," I half-sobbed. I knew I was in a very vulnerable state with this magical person, and it wouldn't take much to get me worked up. "You're good enough for me. But I know you want this. And I want it for you." "Yes." "I think you need it." "Yes," I breathed, a fresh wave of oxygen-stealing arousal shook my body. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. "What did he want?" He asked after a few moments. "To lock me up. To keep me from cumming forever." My voice was trembling. He was now gently stroking my shaft up and down. Barely applying pressure, but still more than a moment ago when it was just his fingertips. He didn't answer right away. "He wanted more than that, didn't he?" "Yes," I trembled. He now took a firm grip around my cock. "He wanted this, didn't he?" "Yes," I said with another shutter, my single word reply almost without form. "To cut it off," he clarified. "Yes," I mewled, a tear now running down my face. His grip on my cock tightened slightly and he was no longer making a jerking motion. He was just holding on. "And you were going to let him." "God, yes," I shuttered out, my cry finally breaking. I sobbed and sniffled. He let this go on for a moment. I felt him shift his weight and I thought he was going to get up. But then I heard a metallic clicking sound. I opened my eyes and could see he was holding a wicked looking pocket knife. His voice was low and dark when he spoke. "Do you want me to do it for you?" Something inside me broke. I immediately started hyper-ventilating, forcing my reply out with each frantic exhale. "Yes, god yes, please do it. Please cut my cock off. Please, please, please, please..." I was crawling all over him, trying to seat myself into his lap in a position I thought would make it easier. He put the knife down on the end table and shushed me. He wrapped his arms around me and cradled me to him, kissing me long and low again. In spite of the couch and his clothes, I could still feel that wonderful warming oil all over my skin. "It's okay. I have something better. Lay back down." I looked into his cool, dark eyes for reassurance as I sniffled. He nodded, and I slowly took up my original position with my head against the armrest. "Do you want this?" He asked again. "Yes," I replied evenly. "Then you will have to give this gift to yourself. I can only help you." After everything, this was the moment when I really began to believe the stuff in the little black sqeeze bottle was exactly what he said it was. "Are you ready?" "Yes." He took a gentle hold of my right hand and turned it palm up. My eyes were still closed as I continued to savor his touch and the feeling of the oils on my skin. I felt him squeeze the cool, thick gel into the palm of my hand. After that he released my cock. His left hand began stroking my hair, and his right hand began idly playing with my nipples. "It's time. Do it." Without reply, I cupped my right hand over the head of my cock, and let out a sigh as the cool gel covered me. I worked it into my shaft and found that it was a wonderful lubricant. I began lazily jerking, also trying to replicate the twisting motion he had used on me earlier with some success. I ached to feel hard, fast strokes, but I knew I should take my time. The lube never seemed to dry up or fade away on me. I worked it into my shaft and balls as thoroughly as I could, and continue to lazily build my way towards a climax. Eventually, my breath became ragged and irregular, and my hips started bucking against my hands. My legs tenses and relaxed, and my toes curled and stiffened. As he continued to silently encourage me by fondling my body, I began what I knew to be my final few strokes. As I began to finish, I drew in a sharp breath, held it, then released it in a low moan as all the tension left my body. Cum shot out all over my hands and stomach. I felt exhausted and relieved. Then I felt something else. It only took a moment and it passed completely, but a warm, dull, tingling numbness that started beneath the base of my cock and traveled all the way up To it's still-throbbing head took my breath away. I stared at it in wonder. He stroked my hair still. "Good girl," he sighed. "You needed that more than you knew." I closed my eyes and a hot, silent tear ran down my face. I felt his hands on me, and realized he was scooping up the fresh cum I had just shot all over myself. He offered, and I sucked it off of his fingers. He smiled down at me with a look of -believe it or not - pride. I don't exactly remember him getting up, but I remember him being gone. He departed without explanation or excuse. He was there and then he wasn't. Apparently his purpose was served. As the days went on I've learned just how perfect that stuff in the little black bottle was. I'm not able to cum. I've tried everything I can think of and worn myself into exhaustion cranking on my cock. I can get awfully close, but it just isn't there anymore. I haven't known a peaceful night's sleep or a clear-headed thought since then. This torture - this hell - is exactly what I wanted.
