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One of those days. Fucking one of those days. I just needed to leave work and fuck an ass. All that pent up frustration sometimes shoots out of my cock.

Where’s a good bottom when you need one?

fdau-300x300.pngI work on the other side of the planet from where I live, so I’ve been attempting to find a few bottoms near the office and on the way home I can stop off an drop a load. It’s my thing. You be there, naked, ass up, face down and ready to receive.

The thing about the way I fuck: It’s not what you think.

[h=2]1. My cock is hard.[/h] When I say hard, I mean rock hard. It’s not hard like a dildo, so let’s make that clear. But when I get erect, I’m in the game until I pop or you poop.

My cock is pliable and I can fuck in many different positions but it’s not for a size queen. It’s about 7 inches and it’s just right. I’ll hit your prostate and bang it often. I know how to find it and usually hit it.

[h=2]2. This Ain’t Your Dad Fucking Your Ass[/h] Incest aside, I fucking know how to fuck ass. Every ass is different and every bottom feels different from the inside.

If I’ve fucked you, please comment.

I don’t want to come off sounding cocky, but my cock doesn’t have a mind of it’s own. It’s attached to me and I’m a professional. Now let me do my job.

[h=2]3. I Deliver a Load[/h] My name online isn’t “iBLASTinside” just cause I thought it was fun. I’ve made a habit of always shooting inside, even when the bottom asks me not to do so (and they’ve seen this e-mail address and recognize what it says).

I’ll admit to faking it on occasion, but it’s rare. I love breeding ass.

[h=2]4. My Loads Are Big or Huge, Your Choice[/h] When I cum, it’s not a dribble. It’s not a small amount. I cum a lot and you’ll know it. I throb like a mutherfucker and I shoot a lot. Generally, I provide two large bursts of cum.

You want extra cum? Here’s what you do: Lick my balls before I fuck you. That will assure I juice up before I breed you.

[h=2]5. I’m Always Hard After I Pop[/h] If I like you, I’ll let you cum. It’s not a requirement. Bottoms aren’t really there to get off. But sometimes I am in a giving mood, especially if the bottom provided exceptional service. I probably let a bottom cum about 1 out of 4 times.

It’s even more rare for me to hang around long enough to give him a second load, usually about 20 to 30 minutes later. Of course, that requires he suck me some and if a bottom isn’t sure of his cleaning skills, then he’s going to taste a little of his own shit or I’m out the door.

[h=1]So What’s This Getting At?[/h] Today I’m looking for bottoms and, of course, it results in the usual desperation of four or five contenders before some asshole flags my ad off Craigslist because I dared indicate “bareback” in the text.

Apparently most tops are shitty at their jobs out there, but I have to end up with the bossiest bottoms or just dumb asses who roam the planet playing a game of 20 questions.

Guy 1: “Have a pic?”

Me: “I posted one. Where’s yours? What’s your stats?”

Guy 1: “Send to receive.”

Me: “I posted a pic. Check the ad.”

Guy 1: “Okay. Hot pic. Stats?”

Me: “Did you bother to read the ad?”

Guy 1: “Oh yea. Hot. Where are you?”

My response: “Um. Ad.”

Guy 1: “Oh. Got a place?”

My response: “As it says in the ad, I’M AT WORK. So, no, I don’t have a place. You went to school on a short bus, didn’t you?”

(FYI, that one ended there.)

Guy 2: “Still looking?”

Me: “The ad went up like a few minutes ago. So, yes.”

Guy 2: “Cool. What are you looking for?

Me: “A bottom to breed. Like the ad says.”

Guy 2: “Pic?”

Me: “Posted one. Send yours.”

Guy 2: “You got more pics?”

Me: “Yes, for trade.”

We trade pics at this point.

Guy 2: “You’re pretty big. I’m not sure I can take you.”

Me: “It’s 7 inches. You can sit on it and take your time.”

Guy 2: “I’m really tight.”

Me: “I’m really hard.”

Guy 2: “You got supplies? Condom? Lube?”

Me: “I’ve got lube.”

Guy 2: “We need a condom. Can you pick up one?”

Me: “Dude. What do you think ‘breed’ means?”

Guy 2: “I only do safe. Sorry.”

Me: “Don’t fucking reply to ads with ‘breed’ or ‘bb’ in them.”

Guy 2: “I thought you might make an exception.”

Me: “I don’t.”

(So this one ends.)

Guy 3: “You got a *pic?”

Me: “Posted in the ad?”

Guy 3: “Got a face pic?”

Me: “For trade.”

Guy 3: “Okay.”

We trade face pics.

Guy 3: “I don’t have a lot of time. Got to do this before my roommate gets home. Okay?”

Me: “No problem. Where to?”

10 minutes pass

Guy 3: “What are you looking to get into?”

Me: “Just looking to fuck and breed an ass. Where do I go?”

Another 10 minutes

Guy 3: “I’m at [a vague major crossroads]. Do you have a full body pic?”

Me: “Look, do you want to trade pics or fuck? Where do I go?”

About 5 minutes pass

Guy 3: “Sorry, my roommate will be home soon. Can we do this tomorrow?”

Me: “Do what? Trade vague e-mails while you jerk off?”

(Obviously, this one ends too.)

Guy 4: “Great pic. Here’s mine. Please come over and load me.”

Me: “Where are you at?”

Guy 4: [Provides address and directions.] “When will you be here?”

Me: “About 20 minutes. I’m on my way.”

Guy 4: “Great. Door’s open. Just push it open. In jockstrap and lubed.”

(FYI, he was. But this one has a weird story. Maybe it will be the next post.)

[h=1]Sounds Like Flakes So Far…[/h] no-flakes.jpgYea, it does. But it gets so weird how bottoms get so fucking picky how they want it. It’s all on their conditions when they want it.

Believe me. Read some ads on Craigslist.

I just want to use an ass. Yes, most of these guys where picky losers.

It’s real easy. I tell you who I am, what I want and where I am. Just be a bottom and ready for it. Is it really that difficult?

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