Feeder Posted February 19, 2011 Report Share Posted February 19, 2011 Click here to see Defiant HIV+ Bareback Fucker's original blog post... Since my last entry I have continued to try and wrap my head around what is behind the idea of "taking loads", as opposed to simply getting fucked. Indeed, I am having a hard time in trying to unravel what this means, let alone why it is such a driving notion at times. There are those, of course, that believe it to be entirely self destructive. On the other extreme there are those that deny this is self destructive and even get pissed at the notion that someone would say this about them. While I do not get pissed at all, I think I would count myself closer to the end of that spectrum that does not view taking loads as fucked up or self destructive. Note, I am not saying it is not a dangerous game to play, I am saying it is not a psychologically self destructive game to play. I think too often things that are actually part of human nature are considered "problems" or "issues" when the truth is, they are just a part of our human make up that we try to deny. Why do I believe this? I firmly believe in evolution and with that I suspect that humans (especially males) are wired to mate continuously, often, and with everyone. In the straight world this perpetuates procreation. There is no reason to suspect that homosexuals would not have the exact same drives (even if it does not result in procreation - and there may be other evolutionary reasons why homosexuality occurs). Sexual activity is a primitive need, and wanting as much as possible is natural. Wanting to control it or curtail it is the unnatural condition. To try and understand this I decided to try and identify what conditions would guarantee that I would take as many loads as possible without fear or without being under any type of coercion. Since I usually chicken out, or logistically never seem to organize what it would take, I tried to imagine the "perfect" conditions. What are these perfect conditions? What if I showed up to SFCockpit on March 12th and hung out a while, getting sucked, fucking, and maybe even taking a couple cocks up my ass? Just enough activity to get me super horny, but without cumming. Then say that I got into a sling for one cute A&F type dude and let him have his way with my hole, only to find myself surrounded by several more hot A&F types wanting their own "hole time" with me. Is there any chance I would bail? Is there any chance that I would not take ALL of their loads? Actually, there is zero chance I would find a way out of that one. I'd get loaded up and stay put for as much as I could get, however long it took! Does this mean that this is the only scenario in which I would take multiple loads? Probably not, but it certainly would guarantee I would be down for the count, and that I would be going home quite messy. What are the drivers of this certainty? 1) An animalistic gang like scenario 2) My own hormonal needs and sexual drive 3) Hot guys, and perhaps any guys with hard cocks 4) Lots of cum to seal the connections I think that the truth here is that if I was thrown into a sling without priming the odds would be lower on my completing the task. Starting out with getting super horny, followed by a cute dude getting me in the sling, followed by more cute dudes wanting access equals a VERY sealed deal. What is more, I think that honestly once I was primed that lesser than the A&F hotties mentioned could probably gain access, especially with coaxing from a single hottie that wanted to watch me take it for him. So, perhaps the thing I mentioned in my last post about taking loads not really being about the top's cock is not so true after all. It is still all about the top and getting his attention. It is also about the group connection. A primitive gang need that is hard to define but certainly hard to resist, once it is in motion. Loads are just a representation of the completeness of both an individual top's attention and that group dynamic. So, I reverse myself after a bit of consideration. Being a bottom seeking loads is not really self centered. It is anything but self centered. It is, in a way, the most selfless act of providing pleasure to others that one can imagine. It is also a way to participate in the most basic human condition. We are "group animals" and the related needs are represented without mask in the situation of a bottom taking the loads of the many. It almost as if this is about a "pack" condition. I run with the pack, I get nailed by the pack! Let me become one with the group! More... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boycunt Posted February 19, 2011 Report Share Posted February 19, 2011 Someone once asked Willie Sutton, the great society figure of the 1930s and bankrobber why he robbed banks. "Well, that's where the money is," was his response. The same rationale underscores why some of us bottoms take loads -- they are there to be taken (and not to be wasted). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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