ON TOPIC

[PaganzofLA]

Birthday Wish: More & Better

I became a TOP by accident, that is a completly fair statement to make. Marginly verse at best, realisticly just fill it long, hard and make it hurt. Although my social awkwardness keeps me from getting laid as much as I need to, as a bottom, no complaints. I've had two long term relationships of over 15yrs each, and still adore these two men. In my 20's I was slave trained for a 6month intensive w/ a top shelf Dom that hardwired me as a default pain pig tie me the fuk up sub. 

Just before my 50th Birthday I had setteled into a comfortable egg casul sex routine w a few fuk buds in the mid 30's - 60 range. Until one day a 3sum arranged by my elder fuk bud much to my surprise was a 66; 49; 19 age ratio. Until this point in time there was nothing even romotely attractive about sniffing out a 19 yo waifish, slightly efeminine, 5'6 - 5'9" twink--(I've suggested in other posts I believe the legal age of conset should be raised a year to 19, but that's just me). Long story short the next few years I crossed over identified as a TOP and had very, very satisfying hardcore penerative playful lusty nasty naughty animal-magnetizm with a surprise tantric cherry on top kinda sex. Besides the Joy of Fucking itself, it would be the mindset I experience as a TOP ---for lack of a better discriptor---is the mindset of an adult, adult. 

Because I had essentially the most enlightened hardcore sub-training one could have (and this is a relativity new realization, which is another great story) as a default submissive my experiences subsequently are more about trying to direct that experience. The outcome is on par with asking a HAL9000 computer to Lie. And I wonder why the pod bay doors are all closing behind me… (continued)