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A few months ago, I blogged about hooking up with an ostensibly straight young bloke who was the boyfriend of the sister of one of my dealer’s. Since then, I’d been helping him out with his rent at the hostel he’s been staying at but it wasn’t much good for hooking up. We’d hooked up a few times at venues and hotels and he’d stayed at the farm for a few days once. The place in town I’d been sharing since I’d moved to the farm wasn’t feasible given my friends were there too so I decided to lease an apartment. Overlooking the city skyline, pretty modern, two (and a half) bedrooms. Nice ‘get’ really. When Tard first came over, I hadn’t told him I’d leased it long-term and was thinking of inviting him to live in the spare bedroom; obviously the idea of leaving him alone here three days a week most weeks worried me a little. But I intended that first time to stay in the city for at least the week and see how it went. I think I asked him if he wanted to move in on a trial basis the next morning as he was fucking me. We sealed the deal by me flipping him onto his back, sharing a slam and me slam fucking him. It’s been a few months now and, in all honesty, it’s working out better than I’d hoped. We’re not in a relationship but we are living together in every sense except that neither of us expect fidelity. Tard was essentially homeless when we first ‘got together’ so I offered him to share my new place. From the day he moved in, he’s made it clear he prefers to sleep with me in my bedroom even though he has his own room. So far, I’m loving the arrangement. For a kid who basically left home when he was 14 and has lived on and off the streets since then; who became a father himself at 14 or 15 and again at 19 (he’s just announced that his girlfriend of sorts is four months pregnant and she’s intending to keep the kid), who’s spent some time in both juvenile detention and in an adult prison; and who’s supported himself and his drug habit by selling his body since he was young, he’s surprisingly ‘together’ at least in relation to me. He asked me if I minded if he took up escorting again to support himself and his kids and, of course, his drug habit; we talked about it for a long time as I wanted him to be certain that it wouldn’t affect his sense of self. He was more concerned about “sponging” off me. So I’ve been actively helping him establish himself as an escort (versatile and, yes, he works bare and seems literally to have no limits to what services he’s willing to offer) and I must admit it’s been incredibly hot watching a few of his ‘appointments’ with his clients. I filmed a couple of the sessions for him with the clients and I must admit that Tard and I have fucked to the vids already. I booked a session for him with a couple of escorts I’ve regularly hired and they’ve really taken him under their wings. He’s had a couple of bookings with them already and the three of them have done two amateur porn scenes with him mostly getting fucked. One took Tard to a gangbang in Sydney to introduce him to some of his clients and not only did he do very well, he was booked for a breeding party a couple of weekends ago which ended up being three days wired, with his legs open, taking multiple loads. According to the escort who organised it for us, there were some poz tops there; it’s hard to tell on the vid but he’s pretty sure a few poz loads were pounded into Tardy. And he’s decided that’s going to be his focus in escorting; cumdump at bareback parties, with an especial openness towards poz tops breeding negative holes like his. (He’s already persuaded two of his straight mates to be straight cumdumps with him and he does seem to have a talent for identifying straight men who might be interested. (He loves playing with other straight guys and teaching them the wonders of wired gay fucking.) Last Friday week, he brought two young blokes home (from his outreach centre) and we ended up having sex with them; one fucked Tard brutally and we all ended up fucking the younger one. That one’s proven a real cutie.

Earlier in the week, I visited my ‘reserve’ dealer because she was (eventually) picking up her phone. It’s the second time in about a month I’ve seen her (which would also be the second time in over six months). Last time, her sister’s boyfriend was there, a young bloke who calls himself ‘Tardy’ or ‘Tard’ for some reason and he and I seemed to hit it off pretty well. As I hadn’t been partying for several months, I had a few pipes before I left (I now live at least 90 minutes from Melbourne and stay in the city 2-3 days per week) and I offered Tardy some (as you do) and talked. We seemed to get along well. Tardy is a bit “rough around the edges”, very much a bogan - replete with the shaggy, unkempt dark blonde/light brown hair and the jail tatts, etc - and he was obviously a little slow (he was stoned) but good humoured. (He even joked that “Tard” wasn’t a reference to him not being that smart; that had never even occurred to me. He seemed like a decent bloke. But, as I had a few pipes for the first time in a while, I found myself looking him over and finding him attractive. He’s skinny but still looks more athletic than scrawny and does look a little older than he is (he’s just turned 22 a few weeks ago) with that rugged, hairy but young look. I hoped that it wasn’t obvious to anyone although I think he might’ve twigged that I had a quick look at porn when I went out to my car for a few minutes. He was standing behind me when I turned around but he gave no indication that he’d noticed and his demeanour didn’t change at all. Fast forward to a few days ago; the sister announces to me that she’d told Tard to leave. He’d only been staying with them because he was having trouble with the men his housemates; they’d jumped him in the street the night before I first met him and beaten him up. I really didn’t think much of it until I reached the end of their street and there’s Tardy on the corner, looking lost. He waved so I pulled over and asked him how he was. Even though he obviously couldn’t remember my name, he recognised me and was friendly but obviously down. He told me that he’d been thrown out and then asked if I’d ‘collected’? Me being me, I said “yes but I’m about to head home...” And then thought, “shit, offer him a coffee (and a quick pipe)”. He was reluctant to accept at first but relented when I told him I was stopping to grab one anyway (and would sneak a pipe) to ensure that I was alert enough to drive. Long story short, I only just arrived home a few hours ago. When we started smoking, the conversation really flowed. And I kept sharing more and more, by which time it started to get dark. I asked Tard where he was staying and offered a lift but it was obvious he’d realised it was too late to arrange any emergency accommodation. There was no way I was going to leave the kid sleeping rough (Melbourne’s had a shocking cold patch in recent weeks). I felt responsible for that. I told him I’d book a hotel room in the city rather than drive home and that he was welcome to stay there and smoke pipes with me if he wanted. Seeing his eyes light up with gratitude was quite a special feeling but he still was reluctant to accept. I was uncertain if he mistrusted my motives or if he really just thought it was too much but I really couldn’t think of a way to broach the subject of what his concern might be without making it look and feel worse. So I just went ahead and presented him with a fait accompli; I booked a room and gave him my mobile number so he didn’t have to decide until later what he wanted to do. The kid rang me before I even got to my car. I was really pleased. I actually enjoyed talking to him; he’s a good kid who’s clearly had a rough upbringing and I knew that I would never act upon the attraction I had for him anyway. When we got to the hotel, he was like a little kid at Christmas. The view of the city skyline etc was incredible for him. After a few more pipes, Tard announced that he’d find a way to pay me back and, I thought, alluded to sexual favours. When I told him in no uncertain terms that I expected nothing in return but he could pay me half of the hotel bill when he could afford it if he wanted to. He seemed happy with that and we were having a great time just chilling. Until a few hours later, Tardy suddenly said, with a huge mischievous grin on his face, “I’m horny as fuck. I’ll suck your dick if you suck mine”. My immediate reaction was more annoyance than anything else but, I admit, Tard voicing the idea had caused some movement of blood in my nether regions. And then he started flirting full on. It was either that or he was taking the piss. He touched my arm; put his hand on my leg and left it there too long. It even felt as if he’d reached toward my cock before taking his hand away. I kept saying “please don’t mate”. I was speechless otherwise. He settled a bit but the look in his eyes remained...and, by now, I’m now getting pretty uncomfortable and embarrassed. And then Tard’s lowered his pants and his cock is out. It’s a fucking nice one too. Pretty big and oddly thick and veiny for such a skinny bloke. He’s rock hard and playing with himself. I couldn’t look away. Honestly, I wanted to deepthroat him right then and I doubt I was hiding the look of lust on my face. Until he took his shirt off. His body is gorgeous and I couldn’t hide my attraction any longer. My erection was pushing hard to escape and Tard made it clear he had noticed. But I still said, “no.” This wasn’t my intention in helping him and I hated the idea that he might think that’s how he could, or should, repay me. Tard just said, “shut the fuck up. We’re doing this because we want to” and he leaned forward to kiss me; just a small, almost apologetic peck initially but then he moved close and started touching my body and staring into my eyes. His touch seemed confident and assertive at the same time as seeming gentle and calming. Then he started kissing me passionately and his hand’s on my cock. I remember just looking at his chest and his nipples and all I could think about was how weirdly smooth and hairless his chest was compared to his face and his arms and legs. How beautiful those huge brown nipples were. How, when you really looked at them, there were a few strands of blonde chest hair around each nipple and some tufts of slightly darker hair on his chest. And how enticing they’d be to wake up to if you’d fallen asleep with your face resting on that beautiful chest the night before (preferably from exhaustion while feeling a firm young cock slowly losing its erection but never quite becoming flaccid.) As much as I kept protesting that he didn’t need to do this, Tard just kept kissing me and touching me, coaxing me to respond. Not that I didn’t lose that battle the instant his lips and his caress set my senses on fire. We were both as horny as hell and when I kissed, then licked and then sucked his left nipple, he groaned. It was the hottest sound I think I’ve ever heard. This young man was as turned on as I was. He wasn’t doing this because he thought he had to. And he was already naked and moving to lie down on the bed, easing me with him. All I wanted to do was ask him how his skin was so soft..it’s really annoying how my over analytical nature doesn’t even lay off when my senses are on fire....so I grabbed the pipe, and went shotgun with a massive amount of smoke in his mouth. At some point, Tard paused and said, “you need to understand that this is not something I haven’t done before. I have. Sure there’s been times when I’ve hated myself for it. But there have been others where I enjoyed it. And I’m loving this and I want this. With you. You make me feel special. You don’t talk to me like I’m dumb, like I’m a loser. You’ve shown me more care after meeting me a couple of times than some people I’ve known my whole life. Don’t worry: I’ve sucked cock to get drugs. I fucked blokes to get drugs. I’ve taken plenty of cocks just to score. Fuck me dead, I’ve taken cocks when there was nothing in it for me except not getting bashed. I’ve been fucked full of so much cum by so many blokes that I used to wonder why they didn’t talk to my “dirty boy cunt”. But I like having sex on drugs too and I’ve begged for cock after cock and load after load because that’s all I was to them. Been there, only a few months ago. Got gangbanged by probably a dozen old men because they gave me all the gear I could take and them some. And, afterwards, I had sex with another old guy because he was the only one who asked me if I was ok. So I said thank you the best way I know how. I pulled him towards me, kissed him and said, “please come here and make love to me. And I turned myself on my back and lifted my legs up and said, “give me your load daddy”. And he did. He fucked another load of cum into me. And I loved him for it. He fucked me like I was the only cunt left in the world. He blew in me like all the others but then he kissed me and held me and even told me that he was fucking his cum into me. His cum was to seed my cunt alone, not to be passed around to the next cock. And I loved him for that. But I still enjoy getting fucked. I love it. I love fucking women too but, shit, I think there’s hardly been a month when I haven’t gone out alone so I could get my cunt pounded. I’m good at giving it and at taking it. Both to live and because I enjoy the sensation of it all. And now there’s you. A hot guy who’s so caring that he can’t accept that he’s even sexier because he’s a bit shy and a bit worried about getting some care back. You’ve made a difference to me, you know. The way you look at me with all that lust but then you worry that you’re like the other thousand dicks that have blown their load into my cunt. But you’re nothing like them. You cared about me when your dick wanted you to fuck me like a worthless cunt but you actually talked to me like I was worth talking to. I want this, and I want you to want me just because you want this too.” I know I just collapsed into him when he said that. And, somewhere in exploring his body, my cock and his arse crack rubbed against each other and the boy just sighed. A massive sigh. That alone made my cock go even harder and Tard must’ve sensed it too because he started working his hole back toward the head of my cock. I can’t honestly even remember what he said but it was along the lines of “I’m so happy you top. It’s going to be yours tonight. I know you’re dying to get my cock in you and you will. And now you know that I can’t wait for you to fuck me”...which, of course, was my cue to thrust into his arse. I’d intended only to insert the tip but, somehow, I slammed into him, tearing through his second sphincter as well. I’m blaming the bottom though: Tard’s entire body just seemed to heave and push back on me so I gently pushed in further. Before I knew it, my cock was exploring the walls of his innards. I love watching a man’s eyes react when you penetrate his hole and the groan he made was just magical. And then Tard blurted out, “have you ever slammed?” It sounds awful in hindsight but it was so hot, so unbelievably hot, at the time. “Yes. Have you?” And his eyes lit up. “We’re going to slam fuck each other one day soon, aren’t we?” You should have felt how his body wrapped around my cock even more when I said, “I have some fits. We can do it tonight.” And, at that moment, one of us moved in such a way that our bodies were fucking each other. I don’t know if I thrust into Tard or if he thrust his cunt back onto my cock but suddenly I had ripped through his sphincter and was balls deep inside him. I’m a bottom who’s learned to be versatile, especially if a man has already taken control of my cunt and fucked me silly. Flipping is easy then. But it usually takes the attempted destruction of my cunt to make my dick reliable. Even though I flip pretty skilfully nowadays, I rarely top first. But we were fucking like animals. It was as animalistic and violent a fuck as I think I’ve ever done. Everything I saw from Tard, every sound he made, every thrust demanding I go deeper and harder...everything just made my desire for him and his pleasure more urgent. My cock and his cunt were one. I doubt I’ve ever loved another human being as completely as I did as I was making mad violent love to him. And then we flipped. And flipped. And flipped. After a few hours of fucking, we held each other a while. I’ve kissed and licked and sucked every inch of that boy’s body. And we ended up staying for three nights. We invited a few other guys over after the first day and a bit and it’s fair to say that Tard’s almost as insatiable for cock and cum as I am now. I’ve booked him into a hostel for a few weeks so he can sort out what he wants. And he’s got a standing invitation to stay with me on the farm as often and for as long as he needs. I’m already missing him. I want his cock inside me. I’m encouraging him to get tested for HIV but that’s up to him. It’s my birthday next week; I’m hoping he’ll get tested so he can tell me, if he tests positive, that he’s giving me an extra special present. But that’s selfish of me, I know...but it’d add even more fire to our love making. And, of course, I want my cock inside him. Not because I enjoy fucking the young man and not even because he derives so much pleasure from it...but because I get to hold him and feel the softness of his skin and smell him. He’s already reminded me of something I started to lose sight of: that it’s important sometimes just to be there for people you care about and have them care about you...