filled-by-you

when i first started exploring sex, it was in irc type chat rooms, first straight, then bi, then gay channels. finally met a guy in person off there junior year of college and another one senior year. a couple years of sexlessness later... next two guys I met in person, first a guy in the SF union sq borders bathroom, then a guy outside steamworks in berkeley late at night who took me back to his house, my first raw experience probably a good thing i met him outside steamworks instead of inside lol couples years of gay-sexlessness later, i was in NYC, websites were getting better, started using different sites, eventually met a few guys off men4sexnow then men4now. i was definitely already interested in bareback sex even if i was *trying* to not be too reckless. spent time on barebackcity.com and then bareback.com finally adam4adam came along and i've used that ever since, def the best site for my preferences/needs

I'm new to the site but want to jump in and share my experiences... Might as well start with this thread... The fifth person i ever fucked with was my first black man and the first off a hookup website (men4now). he had a 8.5" dick that was bigger and definitely thicker than anything i'd seen yet. That was a real turn-on because i had been impressed by the last dick i had played with, which was probably 7.5 to 8" and thicker than average. this was bigger, veiny, and very dark. It's like with every experience, the dick and the man was getting hotter and hotter. i've since had several even bigger and thicker (black) dicks, but this was my first true big one, and it turned me on to superhung men and superhung black men forever. it also turned me into a total slut for several minutes. i was on my knees pulling his dick out, licking and sucking it until it grew hard, and when it reached its full size i just knew i wanted it inside me raw. i didn't say it out loud, but the desire was unmistakable. i got up off my knees and bent over the bed, and he knew what to do. he pulled out a condom, put it on and used some lube to work inside me. part of me was thankful he put on a condom because i realized i wasn't going to ask for it and the back of my mind was still conscious even if it was being held in a full nelson by the emerging slut part of my mind... anyway, he started fucking me slowly but i felt that he was losing his erection. without a moment's hesitation, i pulled off his ass, reached behind me and pulled the condom off him and guided him back toward my hole. he obviously thought that was hot because i could feel that he was harder again as he entered me and started fucking me again. he still went slowly and i'll never know why but he started getting soft again. when i could tell he wasn't getting his erection back, i stopped him and had him pull out. i dropped to my knees to suck him back to full hardness. now, this is the part that is nasty and may gross you all out, but i was still young and inexperienced and didn't know how to clean my ass out.... there wern't any pieces of shit on his dick, but there was definitely some ass juices that were not "clear" and there was a sesame seed that had obviously come from my ass... i know, ew, sorry. i wasn't trying to be nasty. i wasn't trying to do a2m. i just wanted to suck his dick. it made sense in my mind that sucking his dick was what i wanted to do. i didn't stop and think for a split second, even seeing my dirtiness on his dick. in one thoughtless motion, i picked up his dick into my right hand, slid my thumb across the gorgeous head (i guess in some weird symbolic (non-)"cleaning" of it) and went down on him. he moaned and muttered something to indicate how nasty and hot it was, and told me he wanted to watch me jack my dick. i guess the nastiness of it was getting to me because i started getting close to cumming and he told me he wanted to see me cum. i laid back and jacked off and as i got closer and closer, he leaned down and did something i had never seen or heard of done before, didn't even know it was possible to add to the pleasure of cumming... as i started cumming, he licked the bottom of my balls and ballsack! i felt so fucking good and busted so fucking hard, drenching my torso in cum. once i was done cumming, i tried playing with his dick some more, but was sort of shocked back into reality, that post-cum wtf-did-i-just-do state of consciousness. i didn't want to be lame and not get him off so i was trying to jack him but i obviously wasn't into it and he said he wasn't gonig to cum just from jacking. i told him sorry that i was kind of out of it now that i'd cum, and i legitimately felt like i was letting him down. he was really gracious and said it was okay he understood. he got dressed and headed out. i think that experience of not pleasing him made me a MUCH better bottom. the fact that he wasn't staying hard, that i wasn't keeping him hard, made me into a more expressive and active bottom during the actual sex. it made sex for me about wanting to please my tops. it made me realize that doing something nasty is no big deal to me but a huge turn-on for tops, so that i am willing even eager to do nasty shit for my tops. since then, i have never failed to focus on my tops pleasure, i have never let a top leave unsatisfied, i have never stopped fucking just because i came (a story about that to cum later...). and it's not that i think to myself, darn i came now i have to keep fucking, it's that i WANT to keep going, i ENJOY the post-cum sex itself, like its a whole different stage of the sex act, when i am showing my top that i'm here for his pleasure and that i find him so fucking amazing that i am enjoying the sex with him even after i've cum.