[True Life Tales] how to be pissed off

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Si has been calling every day for the last week. His call the other day when I left the sauna was typical of them.

He calls ME, then when I answer he shouts ‘hello? HELLO?’ as if he’s terribly busy and always on the phone to people much more important me.

‘Hi.’ I roll my eyes. ‘Whats happening?’

‘Oh nothing, nothing…you?’ He pauses like always. I can feel that he wants me to ask about Garry. He is absolutely bursting to talk about him, I can feel it. As I said before I don’t want to engage in the subject. I have no problem with them going out or shagging, I wasn’t going out with either of them and had an incredible shag with both of them, at the same time, so I have no real problem with 2/3 of a very successful threesome continuing to enjoy each others company, especially when I was in fucking Africa.

We spoke no real words about nothing in particular, but I could hear someone in the background. The thought of Garry went through my mind. Si was trying to ask me something in a roundabout way, but it seemed like someone else was telling him what to say. I cut him off,

‘fuck sake Si either put him on or spit it out.’

‘can we use your flat to fuck in?’ he really did spit it out, and I spit out my fag and spluttered.

‘whats wrong with yours?’ all his flatmates were girls, and he was telling me how all their boyfriends were round all the time, and he didn’t want to bring Garry back because they also thought that me and him were still seeing each other, and he didn’t want to seem like he was cheating on me.

I really did not know what to say. I didn’t have a problem with them fucking, but i wasn’t a hundred percent cool with doing all that, just to make Garry and Si’s life easier, and to make Si look better than he actually is.

‘Nick, are you there? NICK!’

‘yeah man whatever, do what you like, you usually do anyway.’

And with that I hung up. Not the most mature but whatever I really wasn’t in the mood to duke it out with him.

2 days later, I was working at the café at the bus station, which is a cheap little place that does an amazing fried breakfast, but you don’t want anything else from it. The people that work there are the type of folk that have been working there for a hundred years, so you have to work to their ideas because bringing in new information or techniques would just blow their minds.

Si had spoke to me the day before, and I told him where I was working the next day. In fact I told him I was working the next day to get him off the phone, then he asked where and of course I had to tell him. He said he really wanted to see if I was ok. He wanted to come down anyway to shop so would come down tomorrow. I was like you can do what you like im fine mate.

So the next day Im working at the café, at the kiosk bit right on the concourse. It was mid morning and fairly busy. Would have always have a couple of customers there as I dolled out ‘coffee’ and cans of juice.

Im pouring ‘coffee’ into a polystyrene cup when I see him approach the kiosk.

‘Hi, hows it going’?

‘Im kind of busy here, Simon, what can I do for you?’ he looked injured. I really didn’t get his problem, I reckon he was angry because we had started getting close again and then I had gone off to Kenya for a month and left him high and dry. OK, but he doesn’t understand that I need to be in a relationship where if I need to go to Africa, I need to go to Africa and that’s the end of it. I guess he felt doubly injured because of what happened in Manchester then he thought I had got one up on him again with Africa.

I was liking him less and less.

‘You know what’ I said before he could say anything, ‘you can stop dangling garry in front of me and just get in with it that will be £2.50 please luv because I am really fed up with listening to you trying to justify what is going on, just do it and leave me right out of it.’

‘with all we’ve been through, your just going to throw it away?’ he asked. There were four customers now, I was still serving but they were certainly aware that there was a scene about to erupt. I didn’t care about that right then I just wanted to sort that boy straight.

‘I didn’t throw it away you are the one who is messing around with someone who was vulnerable and needed support not a fuck. You are just doing it to get one over me because of what happened.’

‘well if you handnt gone off with your ex in Manchester we could have avoided all of this! You don’t even know how much you hurt me, I had liked you for so long…’

I shouted because I was absolutely fuming: ‘ YOU never said anything about that for months! How was I meant to know you wanted to be with me when you don’t even tell me? Am I meat to read your mind?? You obviously arnt over what happened in Manchester so why the fuck did you tell me you were??’

There was a bit of crowd gathering.

‘well I was till you fucked off to be a fucking hero in Africa you selfish prick!’ I was shocked I couldt say anything, the scary thing was he seriously meant that.

‘I cannot believe, I CANNOT BELIEVE that you put yourself, you put your sex life over Aids orphans, you are a wanker, you know nothing about the world and you know nothing about me. So quit sniffing around me and trying to make me jealous or whatever fucked up mind games you are trying to pull.’

He got stared at by the customers in the queue. It was the knockout blow and he slinked off giving me the finger. I was fuming, there was more steam coursing thru my veins than there was in coming out of the coffee machine.

I served the remaining customers, one said not to worry, that we didn’t seem right for each other and the other guy was lovely, he asked a bit more about what had happened and I explained a little more about what had gone on. He said that Si obviously had some deeper seated problems than made the relationship impossible to begin with, and I should be proud that I was doing good work, and what was he doing with his life? I agreed with that. People can be lovely sometimes!

I looked at the clock, 6 hours more to go, I didn’t want to be around here any more it was making me so frustrated. I found the manager and said I had a family emergency blab la, had to go. I bought 20 fags, sat on a bench, smoked one after the other and tried to think. I texted one of my mates and she came into the city and we went for a coffee before I headed home. I got a call from garry I was on the bus, I just answered and said ‘go fuck yourself.’

So I felt better. I have to learn how to cut loose from things quicker.

Spoke to this hottie from the net last night, kind of cheered me up. He wanted to meet me and eat my ass out then work it over with his fingers. I was like ho yeah!! He had two days free, today and tomorrow, but both are shit from me. We had like ten different times arrainged but things kept coming up, mainly for me. And he couldn’t accom because his boyfriend (!) would be home soon. The only way to meet was at the sauna, but I really didn’t feel like going back after only just over a week and paying another £10 just for him to eat me. Although he says he can have me over next week with his boyfriend for a threesome. We’ll see if it happens, could be fun! Although threesomes can have unintended consequences!

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