Short-circuiting a lecture when getting testing

[whtbbcumhole4blk]

Hey guys...

First post...and need some advice.

35 bareback cumhole. Rarely, if ever, ask the top's status. Don't go chasing, but know that eventually I'll turn up poz. I'm pretty content with that, when it happens it happens.

Last time I was tested was back in April with one of the mouth swab tests at a bar here in Houston. Neg. But the pre-test "Health/sex practice" questionnaire frustrated me to the point of almost walking out.

Wanting to get tested again, maybe full STD work-up...but don't want to be hassled/lectured about my choices by clinic workers.

So how do you (not the broad you) short circuit the lecture during/after the testing?

Thanks!

[Guest GoodExercise]

Indifference. They sense weakness. Just look and act like you don't give a fuck what they say or think -- and be clear that you are there only for the service, nothing more. They don't want to talk to the wall.

[rawTOP]

I've been almost rude to them in the past when they start getting preachy (depending on my mood and how feisty I was that day). When things start getting invasive look them straight in the eye (GoodExcercise is right - don't show weakness) and say "I'm just here to get tested. I know you have a job to do and have to ask certain questions, but I've been through this many times before. I've given the issue a lot of thought and I understand the risks I take. I'm comfortable with my risk level. I really don't need lectures." I've never had someone push it after that. They actually get very apologetic about the questions they're required to ask. In fact I think my chart is now noted with a "just ask the minimal questions" 'cause now when I go in they start with "I know you just want to keep this short..."

Bottom line - when they push, push back. If they're really obnoxious just keep asking to end the interview - that you just want the test and nothing more. You can also exaggerate to make things absurd. Take the number and multiply by 5 or 10. So if 20 guys have fucked you, say 200...

[TheBottomEnd]

I'd like to do a full spectrum test, but I just HIV test at home so I don't have to deal with the fact they have any clue who I am or my cumhole habits.

[chamaerops]

Just been at my GU clinic for a full-range test. During the usual assessment I quite enjoyed sharing with the nurse my risky outdoor bb habits with anon men, specifically taking and giving anal with full breed. Her face was half horrified and half smirky. Exciting.

[TeenSlut]

I don't think it's ever necessary to be snotty towards doctors in these situations. Casual barebacking between men is high-risk for HIV, which is a very serious chronic illness. Of course your doctors are going to have problems with you doing it because it isn't in the best interests of your health, their primary concern. Do you get pissy when a dentist lectures you about drinking soda?

Yeah yeah it's annoying getting talked to as a child when you're an adult capable of assessing the risks yourself but I'm sure you're secure enough in your choice to bareback that a by-the-numbers safe-sex lecture is just a mild inconvenience. Any attempt to short circuit the lecture could have the opposite effect, and alarm your doctor. Best just suck it up and feign a genuine intent to change your ways.

[GermanFucker]

I don't think it's ever necessary to be snotty towards doctors in these situations.

I agree. Also it sometimes makes sense to ask about behaviour beforehand. E.g. if a test has a certain number of false positives, that can mean that for the average person it's more likely to be a false positive, whereas for a slut with his higher risk level it's far more likely that its not. Knowing about the behaviour can help the nurse or doctor proceed and prepare the testee accordingly.

HOWEVER, it's not ok to pry against the will of the one getting tested. Personally I am always friendly with the nurses while leaving room for interpretation. My standard answer is along the lines of:

"I'm here to do my civic duty. I'm still young and therefore have a very active sex life. I know ALL about safe sex and I look out for myself (which can mean anything). No specific risky contact comes to mind (there were far to many). But one can never be 100% certain. That's why I'm just here to get tested."

I am not shameful about myself, never get defensive or agressive. I wear a sincere smile that implies "Hey, I'm on your side". And I NEVER get bothered.

[rawTOP]

I don't think it's ever necessary to be snotty towards doctors in these situations. ...

Yeah yeah it's annoying getting talked to as a child when you're an adult capable of assessing the risks yourself but I'm sure you're secure enough in your choice to bareback that a by-the-numbers safe-sex lecture is just a mild inconvenience. Any attempt to short circuit the lecture could have the opposite effect, and alarm your doctor. Best just suck it up and feign a genuine intent to change your ways.

You're not old enough to have gone through literally dozens of these lectures. They get so tiring and they're so condescending. You start thinking not getting tested is better than having to go through that AGAIN... When the person getting tested knows the script and can tell the counselor what they'll say next the whole exercise is rather pointless.

At your age maybe the lecture is warranted. At my age it's not.

[bb1991]

I wouldn't be too rude with somebody that's going to be sticking you with a needle... believe me, they know how to make it hurt and how to leave bruises.

I'd say just be polite but firm; tell them you know the risks, have been through the questions before and would just like to be tested.

[HardhatBB]

never had any lectures or attitude when gettin my blood checked. They know, i told em a BB top and there was no "static" or anything. who knows..id think in a small town area thered be assholes about it, but in NYC? realley- im old fashoined there i guess...honesty best policy with status...no guessing involved

[cheffie]

I have a full spectrum test done every 6 months. It is $250, but done at a place called LabCorp. They don't ask any questions. You go in, and within 5 minutes your done. Very nice. They email the results 3 days later and if anything is negative they have a doctor to talk to and prescribe medicine if needed. I found them originally from www.stdexpress.com - way better than dealing with a clinic or a doctor

[bearbandit]

Regular testing for STDs is vital. If allowed to run their full course, some of them can be very nasty, besides it's impolite to pass something on to someone and not tell him. Even before HIV London Gay Switchboard was reccommending STD testing every three months.

The doctor and her/his staff are working for YOU. You're the one paying them, either directly or through taxes. Medical ethics demand courtesy (on both sides). My new consultant would really rather I didn't drink: I've been diagnosed with an inflamed liver since '04 which means it was probably in that state for years before. I like my couple of cans or half bottle of wine every evening and don't plan on giving them up. That's something we're going to have to work around, as I refuse to give up quality of life for quantity of life. Doctors need to learn about each of their patients and their wishes.

A comparison: my mother is dying from COPD: she's refused treatment as it requires about 16 hours per day oxygen just to delay the end. She's going for the shorter non-treatment route where she can still smoke. I expect she'll be dead well before the end of the year, but it will be on her terms and wishes. She has told the medical establishment what SHE wants. I hope I have her guts at the appropriate time.

[chamaerops]

I've been yesterday at local clinic for my test results, all neg. I did actually enjoyed been lectured by the lady consultant over the importance of not been fucked bareback by random guys. She went through usual details such as the risks of my rectum being scratched while taking a load and so on. I kept my straight face while I was very excited being told how to get fucked by a woman.

[whtbbcumhole4blk]

Thought I would update everyone...

I finally went for a full physical exam for the first time in years (had been in school and not had insurance). The doctor I saw at the "multi-specialty clinic" offered to do STD blood work as part of the exam. Waiting on the results to post to their online system, but no questions, lectures or guilt-trips while getting the exam or blood draw.

[fargo_bare]

Up where I live every time you pick up an STD you get a call from the state health dept. I have the guy calling me now from the last experience with gonno. Now that I have his number I just ignore it. They always want to know who gave to to me. and do I practice safe sex. Ummm NO, that is why i got gonno