A subtle shift in my thoughts

[samson]

Hey boys,

I've been doing a lot of traveling lately but I just got back to LA and really in the last 48 hours I've noticed a subtle, but I think possibly significant change in my thought process.

A few months back I posted about my struggles with bug chasing in that it is a huge sexual fantasy of mine, but at this time I'm not even sure I want to bareback just because I haven't come to terms on any level with the realities of being poz.

I've had a few experiences with guys lately where I really wanted to not ask them to use a condom - or one time when a fuckbuddy of mine, who's clean, ended up cumming in me. I was annoyed that he didn't tell me it would happen but also found it really fucking hot.

More and more I want to take loads and I even met up with two poz guys. We didn't do anything but make out - but still I'm starting to play with that fire...

Now here is the mental shift I've noticed. There are a few new guys in my area I might hook up with soon and we haven't talked about playing safe yet or status and my brain keeps very genuinely and calmly thinking I should just not ask their status and let them decide what they want to do.

I don't know if I'll follow through with it - probably not yet anyway - but that thought has NEVER crossed my mind but I keep thinking how much easier - less work it would be just to not ask and start taking loads if the guy decides he wants to give it. I know the sex would be SO MUCH HOTTER that way... but still... I haven't wrapped my head around the consequences. The even crazier thing is I can feel myself starting to feel like I want to come to terms with it so I can just start chasing.

I'm only 24 so I have a lot of life ahead of me, and the other thing is my work is very international and there are countries I want to continue to work in that might not grant me visas if I have things like HIV - so there's still a lot for me to keep playing safe - but damn... what is going on?!

Am I slowly going down a path of no return? Do I even want to stop it? I don't know. What do you guys think?

I thought some of you would appreciate hearing this and also would love to hear your thoughts.

[foxb]

Maybe try getting on PreP? Its doesn't give you 100% protection from catching HIV, but if you keep to your drug routine then its very effective. Obviously it only protects you from HIV and in my opinion im more scared of hepC than HIV >.>

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

I agree with foxb... Get on PeEP regimine and relax... PrEP will require regular testing. And woont help with other STIs (or at least not studied for that). But you can have that freedom and as long as you can adhere to the regimen - which you would have to do post infection at some point - you can get more of what you want at lower risk.

[samson]

Hmmmm I'll have to look into this. Is it expensive?

[rawTOP]

Hmmmm I'll have to look into this. Is it expensive?

Start here…

https://breeding.zone/forums/149-PrEP-Discussion

As far as cost - it depends on your insurance.