Oh, what have I done?

[Hotload84]

I dumped my first load of the New Year in a cum hungry hole about 3 a.m. on New Year’s Day. At an all gay New Years Eve party hosted by some friends at their home. Now I got to tell you, I’m not out as poz, which makes it easier to pump my load into certain guys on some occasions.

The main theme of these parties, which our hosts hold every other month, is bareback. Any precautions any of the attendees take are solely at their discretion. Most attend a "social" at nearby bar the night before. To get to know each other. But I’m almost never able to attend because of my work (which makes it convenient to avoid questions about my status).

I’d been doing poppers off and on had already been in the sling and had was out of Viagra. Without that, especially once my hole has been aroused, my dick usually thinks it has a free ride and doesn’t even bother to get up. About 2 a.m. I attempted to give one of our hosts a load of gratitude. But as it turned out, my spirit was willing but the body was weak.

These parties are held in their basement. The play space consists of a main room with a leather covered bed, and a chain link fenced off sling area with a couple slings and a mirrored ceiling, and a small separate piss play room with a sling as well as seat and tub.

On going back downstairs after a smoke, I saw a guy in his forties, slim but not skinny, with a long ponytail. He was lying on the bed, playing with a his hard-on. I thought I’d like his cream up my ass, so I started to suck him, hoping he'd go for my hole. Or at least put a load in my mouth. Slurp! But beyond his obvious pleasure, nothing developed , so I soon tired of oral. I got up to give him a big kiss and head off for greener pastures, when ran his hand up my leg.

“Ahhh,” I thought to myself. “Here we go. This was more like it.”

I gave him all the body language to suggest I wanted it up the ass, but he simply ignored it as his hand encircled my lifeless dick.

I told him not to expect much, but he told me that it was fine the way it was and continued to pump it. I reached down to finger his greasy hole and my dick sprung to arousal. Not only did it get hard. It got purple hard.

Realizing I’d achieved what moments before had seemed impossible, he said he had a nice warm place for me to put it. He rolled on his side so I could slip it in. Before long, I rearranged our position doggie style since we were losing thrusting power from sticking to the bed. The entire time there were guys watching, unaware of my status, but knowing we were doing it bareback.

As I got close to popping I knew I wanted to cum in him. It gets pretty obvious when I’m about to shoot cause I get to huffing and puffing and groaning. He never made any moves like he wanted me to pullout, so on the shot-stroke, I plowed him as deep as I could, with all the force I could muster. After a few minutes to let my dick settle down and catch my breath, I pulled out.

As soon as my dick left his hole, my energy dissipated. My head started to swim. The room started to spin. My vision tunneled down to all black, peripheral-like. I thought I was going to pass out.

Now mind you--I don't do any party favors except poppers, and it had been a while since I’d done those. So I must have exhausted all my physical and mental energy in shooting my cum into that guy’s ass.

I don’t have any concrete knowledge about his status. But with some guys, you can just tell. By their body language afterwards, fulfillment with a tinge of regret. I call it the “Oh, what have I done?” mentality. Yes, I'm pretty sure he’d been neg.