Feeder Posted December 6, 2010 Report Share Posted December 6, 2010 Click here to see Life In The Raw's original blog post... I've been talking about this with a few guys lately, so I decided to share it with you guys. If I'm wearing a condom, its not only the decrease in pleasure that keeps me from wanting to wrap it up, its something else, something that I cannot shake or over look. My mind wont shut up and I cannot get into 'the groove', if you will. When someone insist on a condom they are saying "I am neg, and I want to stay that way. I do not know your status and will not take you on your word, I will take the proper measures to protect myself." If you believe anyone is neg on their word, you are a fucking idiot. I have heard of guys, (doctors that have access to this) that if you wanted to bareback they gave you the rapid HIV test at their place. I know that someguys demand a recent HIV test to play raw. (Though that can be forged) The fact is this, if a guy cares about his status, he will demand safe sex. In that lies my issue. The first time I tried a condom after converting, the thing broke. I freaked out. The other guy didnt, but I did. After that I couldnt relax with him, and I went home. He often pursued me but I always kept him at a distance. When a guy lets me in raw, to me that says, I have HIV or I dont care about my status. That level of responsibility is gone and it's not something I have to worry about. Even if a guy doesnt want cum in his ass, I still dont have to worry about infecting this person. I'm free to enjoy myself. Now, I made the mistake of logging on to adam4adam the other day. This guy came onto me and I told him that I am poz and looking for BB only, he said it was okay that I was poz, that we could wear a condom. I once again said That I was looking for BB sex with a fellow HIVer. He then freaks out at me, calling me everyname in the book, and telling me that all i want to do is spreads AIDS. Now, I know this was just bitterness, gay men often act like you are killing their dog when you wont have sex with them, even when they have boyfriends, that I dont get. You have someone to hold you, put up with your shit, eat cereal in the afternoon while watching Law and Order, and you are going to bitch that some random guy wont have sex with you. But its funny... when guys get pissed at me adam4adam, the first thing they do is pull up my race and status. Yes, I am black and I have HIV, if in your bitterness you want to call me an AIDS Nigger, that only shows how immature you are and how little you have going for you in the character department. Having been black all my life and growing up in a podunk town, my give a shit over the word nigger died a long time ago, you have to try harder to piss me off. And yes, I am Poz... its not an insult, it is a consequence of my actions, and one that I accept. Anyway, my thoughts are jumbled as fuck, but its midnight, what can you expect. Pretty much two more days until my daddy comes from Miami... I cant wait, I am overdue for cuddles. More... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evilqueerpig Posted November 22, 2011 Report Share Posted November 22, 2011 Unless one chooses a life free of fucking, status isn't something one can control.....there are tops who tamper with condoms. Personally, I find recial epithets a total turnoff. Your daddy is a lucky man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barefootbob Posted November 22, 2011 Report Share Posted November 22, 2011 There is absolutely no call for such language in today's society. This knucklehead is a loser, probably has chip on his shoulder and lashing out at people that won't conform for him sets him off. You sound like a really cool dude and have your act together. peace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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