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How I Became a Bugchaser


insatiable

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The first time I ever heard about intentional HIV transmission was on American network TV, in an episode of Law & Order from the late 90s. 

It wasn’t porn.  It wasn’t even gay.  But still something stuck in my sex-fueled 14 y/o mind about it. 

Throughout my teens and 20s, I tried to have “normal” relationships with “normal” guys.   I knew I “wasn’t supposed to” be turned on by HIV, but the thoughts kept coming back on their own.  They made me super horny.  I tried to repress this part of me, but it kept asserting itself.

I (quietly) started bugchasing in 2013.  The next year, I started dating a guy who told me about a new thing called PrEP.  He wanted both of us to start Truvada, and I reluctantly agreed.

Then we broke up.  I stopped Truvada and I never returned to using condoms.   I imply dropped my presumptions about how I was “supposed to” act.  I paid attention to my body's reactions, and embraced the thoughts behind them.

Slowly the poz scene became the most powerful sexual attraction I could find.  I accepted that as part of my nature. I no longer feel conflicted, and I'm much happier (and hornier) for it.

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It doesn’t really matter what your “fetish” is - Bareback, bug chasing, WS, leather, bdsm….the list goes on… the liberation is realizing that you don’t have to follow the “normal” rules, if something turns you on - go for it - and thanks to the internet- no matter what your fetish is - you will always find you are not the only one who enjoys it

Interesting that that tv show is what got you into pozzing (I think I remember that episode) i would be curious as to who else developed a fetish from something from the “normal world “ that was not intended to be sexual 

I can remember being turned on by the opening credits of an old western tv show where tge hero is being drummed out of the Calvary in disgrace- his bars ripped off his  uniform shirt, his sword broken over the commanders knee - and then the part that really turned me on - his commander slapped him hard across the face with his big leather glove

That is where my interest in domination, leather, and rough sex started 

 

 

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