To those who already knows. 

 

I’ve been finding the courage to come out to my workmates now.

 

When I first started working at Michelin, seven years ago, I felt that it was a homophobic environment—one where masculinity seemed to be the norm. So I didn’t feel safe telling people in my life that I was gay. And I suppose back then, I was still trying to find myself, still trying to figure out who I was. I was still pretty new to the dating scene as well.

 

Skip forward to today,

and I feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin.

I feel confident in my ability to manage my emotions, and to have a sense of freedom.

 

I first came out to this new guy called Dylan in December of last year. And I felt such a relief—because I was able to talk to him about my dating experience, which was something I couldn’t really share with anyone at work before, where I kept things fairly professional.

 

And when I was trying to figure out if Paul was gay or not, I came out to Jordan as well.

Since then, I came out to Paul, Michael, Eddie, and Darren.

 

A lot of people suspected I was gay,

so coming out to them wasn’t too much of a surprise—

except for Eddie, who, surprisingly, never suspected it,

not even in a million years.

 

It’s been quite fun, actually—coming out to people one-on-one.

I found tiny moments when we would work together, and it would feel like the right time to share.

And everyone’s been quite supportive.

 

There are still a few more people at work that I need to find the right moment with before I leave,

but I trust in the universe,

and in myself,

that those moments will come.

 

And so far, for the people I have told, it’s felt like such a relief.

Because now I can talk to them about my dating life,

or even make a gay joke,

and it’ll be all right.

 

Even when we have people from head office coming down for a factory tour,

I can now go up to some of my workmates and tell them that I think this person, or that one, is hot—

and we’ll all laugh about it.

 

Ultimately though,

I do want to come out to my mum.

 

I think she already knows—that motherly feeling, you know?—

and she’s just waiting for me to tell her.

 

But to be honest,

I’m still a little scared.

 

Not because I’m afraid of abandonment or anything like that.

It’s just that I feel like, maybe if I finally let it out,

then our interaction would change.

 

And I’m sure it will change,

for the better.

But still,

that feeling lingers.

 

But I feel that moment will come soon,

and I’ll have the courage to tell her.

And everything will be all right.