Good evening beautiful,

I think I’m getting old. I mean, I had the whole Friday night to myself and really wanted to play some video games, but you know what the problem with games these days is? It’s the hours of commitment you have to put in. I don’t think I can fit in a 70-hour game anymore unless I dedicate a couple of weeks off just to play it. So I ended up watching a movie on my own—on the iPad, of course. The movie I chose for tonight was called Flow, about a cat who makes friends with wild animals as the forest gets flooded. Honestly, I almost fell asleep because it wasn’t very engaging, even though it got a great rating on Rotten Tomatoes. To be fair, it was a beautiful movie, but we both know we’re more of the action-oriented, slow-motion, explosion-fueled movie types, right? Yeah, that hasn’t changed at all.

These days, I’m learning to show up for myself and becoming more comfortable just being by myself. I definitely would love to hang out with my friends more, but I find that they’re quite busy. Most of them are actually partnered up, which makes it harder for them to find time for me—especially on weekends. I imagine they’d rather spend time with their partners. I know I would. We both did that when we were in a relationship. It’s understandable. So now I enjoy time on my own, and it feels pretty normal. I’m getting used to it.

I’ve been having thoughts lately, especially after going to my vocal coach session. I feel like if she can teach people and provide value to their lives—and earn money doing it—then I can too. I have skills. I can help people through fitness. The lessons I’m paying for are expensive at $150 an hour, but I’m enjoying them. I have the resources to improve myself, and there are people out there—I’m sure—who could benefit from what I offer.

And there’s this guy I showed you before, the one I have a crush on—Brock Ashby, a personal trainer in Sydney. If he, an ordinary guy, can help people and make a living from it, then so can we. We’re all human. He’s just more focused and motivated than I probably am right now, but with a bit of focus and dedication, I’m sure I can get there too.

I think it’s a good thing I’ve got a couple of things going on right now, between work and singing, because it keeps my time filled. I think I need to put massage on the backseat for now and dedicate more time to my fitness project—to actually get that up and running. There’s this voice in the back of my head that keeps saying, as long as I keep moving, the good things will come my way—including finding my partner. I have a feeling he’ll show up somewhere along this path, which is another reason I want to pursue it. So just to clarify: gaming and massage are on the backseat, and the fitness course comes first for now.

Oh, and before I forget—remember the study room with that giant white wall we’ve been unsure what to do with? I think I’ve found the best solution. I’m going to Ikea tomorrow to get some nice shelves and pot plants and deck it out. The room’s going to look like a lowkey greenhouse by the time I’m done. I think it’s going to look pretty good.

Chat soon. xx