Hello beautiful,

Today was the last time I’ll see Phil for a very long while, and I want to talk about it.

He had originally planned to move to Sydney in October, but his agent recently found him a place—and the lease starts immediately. If he waited until October, he’d still have to pay rent on it for the next three months. So, he made the decision to leave in ten days, right on his birthday, too.

That means tonight was our last time seeing each other.

We were having dinner when he told me all of this, and I was hit with a wave of sadness—followed by excitement for him and the new adventure he’s choosing for himself. He’s a smart guy. I know he’ll do whatever it takes to make it work. He won’t settle for mediocrity.

I realised I only had a few more hours with him. But instead of trying to cram every minute with activity or memory-making, I just slowed down. After dinner, we lay on the couch together, kissing and cuddling in silence, soaking up each other’s presence. No performance. No masks. Just two raw, vulnerable, broken humans holding space for each other.

Later, we curled up in bed. We kissed and cuddled some more, fell asleep in the early hours of the morning, and woke up still wrapped around each other. It was comforting. It felt like home.

This is only the fourth time I’ve seen Phil in person, but each visit is still vividly imprinted in my mind—bright, colorful, dreamlike. I revisit those memories often, and they make me smile.

This time though, I entered the visit without emotional attachment. I’m no longer caught in the tight grip I once had on him. Instead, I got to simply enjoy his presence—his company, his essence. It felt like closure, the way true closure is supposed to feel: clean, tender, and tied with a neat little ribbon.

I placed a bookmark in our chapter—not a full stop. I don’t think it ends here. I have a feeling our paths will cross again someday. And when they do, we’ll both be different people, shaped by new philosophies and stories. I’m curious whether we’ll still feel the same way about each other then.

Keep moving through life with your heart open, buddy—you never know what you’ll find.

Chat soon xx