OKCmarriedguy

I will say that I was a late bloomer and didn’t really understand my attraction to men and mainly to dick until my late teens or early twenties and by then I had an established life and friends and was almost to ashamed to come out and say that I was curious about having sex with guys. I kind of grew into my own way of living, I loved the gym, absolutely loved being lean and having a 6-pack. But I hardly took advantage of it, for almost a year I hardly went out and did anything other than school, the gym, homework and video games, but while everyone else went out and partied, I would indulge in my secret desires online. Chatting with guys online, reading stories, including fictional stories about guys like me being tricked or trapped into having sex with older men. I would usually fantasize about it and masturbate, but every time after I would cum, I would almost feel ashamed or not interested in men, but about 10-15 minutes later, the fantasy would come back and I would get back online and this would repeat and I would jerk-off two-three times a night on the weekends. This went on for a few years as I dug deeper and deeper into my online life. I had come very close to acting out the fantasy, but living in a small town, there were not many options to act out my fantasy. I had a friend who lived in a town about 30 minutes from my hometown, it was a little bit bigger than the town I lived in, but still less than 10,000 people. We went to a small Mexican restaurant and our waiter was very feminine and my friend told me “Yeah he is gay and has aids”. Did the guy really have aids? Probably not. Was he even gay? I have no idea. But that is the stigma that I grew up with, growing my desire to keep my identity secret. But that sentence that was probably false set me on a path that would change me forever. I got home that night and fell into my usual weekend night habit on the internet, but I found myself curiously searching about Aids and HIV and found it absolutely exhilarating! My heart was pounding, and dick was hard as I found HIV dating sites and started searching areas with high HIV populations. This went on for a few weeks before I stumbled across a website called “The Breeding Zone” and discovered that I wasn’t alone in my fantasy. For months and months and months I went there at night, reading stories about guys taking hiv positive loads and becoming poz themselves and just feel in love with the idea. I couldn’t explain the sexual draw to it, but it was like nothing I had ever felt before. After a few months I began writing my own fantasy stories on there and had a few guys comment on them, which made me want to write even more. I would rush home from work and began to write, it was almost all I could think about. I would spend weeks writing detailed stories and post them longing for people to tell me how much it turned them on. I would get some comments that highlight my lack of any actual physical experience, but I would take that and learn from it. After a few stories, I started getting men messaging me, telling me how much they liked the stories, but they all fizzled out. They would be halfway across the US or even in another country. And they didn’t seem turned on by the idea of having a sexual pen pal. But nevertheless, I kept writing, it was the closest I had ever been to actually having sex with a man. Getting to detail a sexual experience that I fantasized about and having other guys talk to me about it. I would say a little over a year into discovering this website, I posted part 4 of a 4 part story about a nice young man from a small town (sound familiar) who moved to the city and ends up letting a homeless man who he gives money too frequently outside his downtown apartment, come up to his apartment during a frigid cold winter storm and ends up getting raped and robed by the homeless man, but this tragic event leads to a destructive cycle of letting them man back into his apartment which repeats the same events, forced sex (which is not seeming to be too forced now) and being robbed and ultimately leads to the young man becoming HIV positive. A couple of nights after posting the story, I received a message from a guy halfway across the country. He told me how much he enjoyed my stories, and he offered up his poz cock to me anytime I wanted. It was such an exciting feeling, but again, he lived in Wisconsin, and I was in southern Kansas. But this guy was different, he wanted to chat and talk about it. I explained my situation and he felt bad and encouraged me to take a trip and act out one of my fantasies. We talked for months and exchanged different fantasies. One night he sent me this fantasy that sent me wild. From him: “We finally meet up, I am so excited to finally get to see you and meet you, but ultimately, I decide that I am too much of a risk. You’re too good of a person and I can’t do this to you. I try to leave, but you ignore me and pull me into you and start kissing me. We fall on the bed and again I try to stop you, but you continue, pulling my clothes off, I try to resist, but you’re so sexy and the emotional connection to you is so strong, I want you more than I have ever wanted anyone. We are both naked on the bed, but again I realize how young you are, you have the rest of your life to live and you’re such a good innocent person, I can’t let me load consume you. I stop and say “my viral load shot up right before I got here, I’m not safe for you, it’s too dangerous”, but you’re too turned on by my rock hard cock rubbing against you. Your ass is dripping from the lube and wanting it so bad, you push me back and say “I don’t care, I am gonna ride your fukken dick whether you like it or not”. I try to resist but the feel of your silky ass sliding down on my cock is too hot for me to push you off. You keep sliding down on my rock-hard cock until I am fully inside of you. You start riding my bare dick and I start coming to my sense and tell you “Babe, seriously stop! My cum will result in you becoming positive, you need to stop and pull of now!”. But you don’t, you ride harder until I suddenly unload a torrent of my hot highly toxic jizz in your tight little hole. As you slide off my dick, red jizz drops out of you and the only thing I can then is welcome to the family son, you just got pozzed. You think for several seconds, then drop back down on top of me, kissing me deeply ands say “Thanks dad! Glad to be your son””. After reading that, if he was close to me, I would have totally let him shoot his load inside of me. This was the closest I had ever been to it, I believe that up until this point, this was just all a secret fantasy that I would never act out. I mean, if I am too afraid to come out of the closet, how would it be to come out of the closet and infected with HIV. But this story, a story from a positive guy directed towards me, I had never experienced anything close to that in my life and it was intoxicating. We talked for months and months and grew very close. I stopped writing and just looked forward to talking with him. He told me that he was a retired wood worker (lol) and became infected in the 80’s so he was pretty viral and had suffered some health complications from it. He said that he had taken meds, but being retired and on a fixed income it was difficult for him to afford. He was in his mid 70’s, I was only 25, so there was definitely an age gap but I was always attracted to older men, not sure why, but older men turned me on. He had to use a cane to get around and suffered from ED and said he hadn’t had an erection in a few years but loved giving blow jobs. Since we would probably never meet, this wasn’t too much of an issue, after all I could fantasize about his dick being hard as stone and unloading a river of poz cum. He also told me he was married, but his husband was ok with him messing around, if he used a condom, so he didn’t infect other people, but with ED he hadn’t done that in a long time. He was a wealth of information for a guy like me, being so inexperienced. He helped me understand some basic questions about anal sex between men and a lot of information about HIV and one thing that I didn’t know is that the likely hood of becoming infected was quite low. He did say that one of the biggest factors in becoming poz was the viral load of the top. He also said that any tears in the rectum could greatly increase the likely hood of infection and that blood in blood was really the only sure way to get infected. He said that with me being a virgin, I would need to be careful that there were no tears in my rectum wall that could expose blood vessels, cum can carry a large viral load, but nothing close to blood, so a top with an open sore on their cock would be extremely dangerous for a bottom. In October 2024 I got a message from Tim (the guy I had been talking to) and he informed me that him and his husband were taking a road trip for fall and he had casually mentioned Kansas and his husband wasn’t thrilled about the idea, after all Kansas isn’t known for its fall foliage, but he thought he had him talked into it. Tim: my husband used to be cool with me sleeping with other guys, but that has been a couple of years, and I don’t think he would be cool with me and him driving halfway across the country so I could meet another guy that I have been talking to for half a year. After all it doesn’t feel like its just sex with you and me. Me: OMG! That has my heart pounding! So nervous and excited Tim: I know! I wish I didn’t have ED issues! But would still be great to see you and I can still shoot a big load if you want to jerk me off or suck me off Me: oh and glad to hear that you see this as more than sex too Tim: Wow! I was so nervous to say that, didn’t want to scare you off, thinking I was falling in love lol Me: you better tell me you love me before you cum in me lol Tim: Oh, don’t you go falling in love, I’m a married man Me: Sorry, I didn’t mean that Tim: Lol I was joking! I think we both are starting to have feelings for each other, but you’re so young, why would you want an older guy like me Me: Lol, you can’t poz me and leave me. Your husband good with another roommate lol Tim: after he saw you he might be lol! All of my sexual frustration and fantasies were being directed at this one person. This guy had no idea of how much he was biting off. I was feeling as though I wanted him more than anything, I wanted him to leave his husband and move in with me and just fuck me raw every night. How long this would last I had no idea. In 5 years he would be in his 80’s and I would be in my thirties. Are there legit emotions involved or just sexual tension? I was blinded and all I knew was that I wanted to be with him. A couple of weeks later I get the message that they will be staying in a town 30 miles from my home town for 2 nights and couldn’t wait to see me. The time flew by, and the day was here and I was a nervous wreck, but felt somewhat comforted by the fact that he had ED and we wouldn’t be able to have sex. I really wanted to, but the reality of becoming poz was terrifying. His husband still didn’t know he was coming to see me, so we planned for me to rent a room at the same hotel, and he would tell his husband that he was going to go for a quick walk or get some ice and would stop by for an hour each day. The day was here, and I was in my hotel room waiting to hear from him and I was ready to leave and chicken out, but I was comforted by the fact that Tim had ED, was a good guy and was happily married and wasn’t trying to poz me, he just liked having sex. He encouraged me to get on prep before we met but told me that it was very unlikely that I would become poz, like less than 1% chance since his viral load was very low, and the chances of becoming poz from oral sex was next to nothing. And he was a good guy, happily married and I could trust him. I brought a 6 pack of beer with me and opened one up to try and relax when I got the message that they just got to their room, and he told his husband to unpack while he runs to get some snacks and asked what room I was in to come say hi really quick. My heart was pounding out of my chest, I was so tempted to chicken out, but I just quickly put down my room number and pressed send before I could talk myself out of it. Within the next 10 minutes there was a knock at the door. I slowly approached to the door and opened it to see a taller bigger man standing there with a cane, he was older than I imagined him being, but still a lot of man. He immediately walked in and gave me a hug. He could tell that I was nervous and tried to console me telling me that it was ok and I could relax. He then pulled me in for another hug, pulling me in tight to his body and kissed me deeply. I began to relax and feel somewhat excited as he pulled me into his body tightly with his arms around me kissing me deeply. Tim: Fuck! We better stop or I’m going to fuck you right here and right now! Me: (nervously) Ok Tim: Damn you look better than the pictures Me: thank you Tim: I am not going to lie I felt my dick move for the first time in years kissing you Me: (just smiles) Tim: come here Tim pulled me in again and started to kiss me deeply Tim: we don’t have much time, but I fucking want you now Tim: My dick is getting so hard for you, I haven’t had an erection in years, but it fucking wants you so fukken bad Tim grabbed my hand and put in down his pants feeling his cock which was getting incredibly hard. He then began to pull down his sweatpants to the ground and reaching over and unbuttoning my pants and pulling them down as I held his cock in my hand. He pushed me back onto the bed and directed me to slide back as he reached down and grabbed a tube of lube out of his pocket and squirt it into his hand. I was scared to death. I wasn’t prepared for this to happen, I didn’t think he could get hard, I wanted to chicken out but watching him rub the lube on his cock was so exciting I was getting so turned on and then he told me how much he wanted me. All these years of wanting to experience this from afar, wanting, but never being wanted and now to finally have someone tell you how much they want you. Tim: I can’t believe this is happening. It shows how much I want you. Do you want me as bad as I want you. Me: (with a Shakey nervous voice I try to squeak out) yes Tim: I am so glad to hear that baby, I want you so bad, I want us to be together. You’re the only one who can get my dick hard. Do you want to be mine? A part of me was saying, you’re not ready to make this commitment, the rest of your life is about to change. How will you tell everyone “Hey I’m dating a 75 year old man and he gave me hiv”? How are you going to tell everyone that? And another part of me that didn’t care about anything outside of this room, my body craved his body and whatever the consequences of this were, it would be worth and and besides, he has a very low viral count, and the chances of becoming poz are less than 1% Me: yes Tim slowly crawled on the bed and on top of me. Feeling his naked body up against mine, the first time I have ever been naked with another man. He started kissing me deeply as I wrapped my arms around his big shoulders. He reached down and grabbed my leg behind the knee bending my knees up one after the other and I felt his rock-hard rubbing against my ass and he slowly moved his hips back and forth until the tip of his cock pressed against my hole, he pushed just enough to not penetrate me. Tim: are you sure you want me Me: yes Tim: I really care about you, do you care about me Me: yes I do Tim: I want to be with you so bad but I have to tell you my viral count is really high and this is dangerous. I laid there nervously looking at him, fuck I wanted it so bad but even he was scared for me, maybe we should stop, but then he started grinding his hips in a sexual motion and it felt so fucking good Tim: FUCK! I want you so fucking bad! Tell me to fuck you raw Me: Fuck I want it too, but is it safe Tim: Don’t you want me baby Me: yes Tim: then tell me to fuck you raw! Let me slide my bare cock inside of you. We can be together. I love you baby Me: Ok! Fuck me baby! Tim: Yes, tell me to fuck you raw! Tell me you want this viral load! You want me inside you and nobody else, tell me that you’re mine! Me: Fuck yes! I want you! I want you to fuck me and shoot your poz load inside me! And immediately I felt the head of his rock hard cock push in and stop and then gradually push deeper and deeper until it was all the way in. Nobody can describe how good it feels to have a bare cock slide into you, you have to experience it for yourself and here I was with the first bare cock inside me ever and I never wanted anything as bad as I wanted this. Tim: this is dangerous, my viral load count is so high, are you sure you want this Me: yes baby! I want it! I am yours, take me! Tim started taking slow strokes and with each stroke I felt my breath get knocked out of my chest until we got into a good motion. As he pushed in harder and faster my arms and legs wrapped around him tighter and tighter. There was so much man on top of me pushing into me with all his force, he cock getting deeper and deeper. Tim: (repeating) fuck yeah, oh fuck, this feels so fucking good! Then out of nowhere Tim: oh fuck I’m cumming And I felt his cock explode a river of hot cum inside of me, just pumping poz cum out of his cock deep inside of me. Then he collapsed on top of me breathing heavily. Tim: oh shit, I have to get back to my room Tim got up and got dressed quickly and using his cane limped out of the room and as he left, he said, ill message you later. I was just lying there naked in the bed with his cum still dripping out of me and just like every time after you cum, reality comes flooding back and I realized what I had done, and I began to cry uncontrollably. I’m going to have HIV everyone is going to make fun of me and treat me like a diseased leper. What have I done! I laid there like that for about 10 minutes and decided I was going to get up and get packed and leave. I wasn’t going to stay and do this again. I got up and got packed but before I left to my car, I started to relax and talked myself into staying. Later that night I got a message from Tim. Tim: hey Me: hey Tim: we are out of ice, want me to stop by? Me: Yes! Tim came back by and said his knee was hurting from earlier so he laid on his back and told me to strip. I started taking off my clothes and Tim pulled his cock out of his sweat pants and grabbed some lube and began to jerk off his cock. He threw the lube to me and told me to lube up, which I did. He then told me to “Come here” so I climbed on the bed and straddled him. We began to kiss and he stopped me Tim: My cock is so poisonous right now, so fucking dangerous. You sure you want it? Me: Yes! Tim: then grab it and take it. Ride my fukken dick until you take all that poz load I reached back and grabbed his dick and aimed it towards my hole and slide back on it slowly. It hurt pretty bad after earlier today my ass was really sore, but I kept going, sliding down on it until it was all the way in and then I stopped for a second trying to relax and get used to it and then I started ridding his dick. I wanted him, I wanted his dick and I wanted his poz cum. It lasted longer than this morning, and it started hurting but soon I felt him unloading a torrent of hot toxic jizz inside of me. I got off him him and bloody cum just poured out of me. Tim: oh man! You’re going to end up poz this weekend after all Then he got up and left me lying there and again I began to cry thinking about what he had just said. So I made up my mind that I would leave first thing tomorrow and again by the time morning came I had changed my mind. I didn’t hear from Tim again until that night. Tim: We have been out sight-seeing all day, if you can call it that in Kansas lol Me: lol, yeah pretty flat Tim: we leave first thing in the morning tomorrow. Me: ok Tim: I don’t want to leave you, I thought about you all day today. Me: I thought about you too! Tim: We should have one more time together Me: Ok! Tim: and make it special Me: how so? Tim: do you trust me? Me: yes Tim: do you want me? Me YES! Tim: ill be there shortly Tim knocked on the door about 15 minutes later and said his husband was in the shower and he coudlnt wait any longer. He pulled me in tight and kissed me Tim: I want you so bad! Me: I want you Tim: I wish we could be together Me: I do too! Tim: we can make it so we will always be together Me: how? Tim just pulled me and kissed me and we made our way to the bed with clothes coming off along the way. I was laying on my back and he started rubbing my cock and then down to my hole and started to finger me without lube. It hurt but I didn’t stop him. It was incredibly uncomfortable and then his finger nails started to scratch me inside. I was trying to keep it in, but it hurt really bad so I eventually let out an “ow!” and he pulled out his finger and told me to look at it as it had blood all over it. I had my legs spread wide and he was laying between my legs and then he got up on his knees and squirted to lube down my ass crack and pushed into my hole and then he pulled out a knife Me: what the fuck is that for! Tim: watch He grabbed the knife and made a cut down the shaft of his hard cock and watched as it started bleeding. He smeared the blood all over his dick and then grabbed some lube and lubed up his cock. Then he laid down on top of me and started kissing me again and making thrusting motions with his hip. It wasn’t long before I was getting back into it and ready and soon I felt his cock pushing against my hole. Tim: do you really want me? Me: yes I do Tim: I want you too! Do you want us to be together Me: yes baby! Tim: no, I mean do you really want us to be together Me: I do! I fucking want you so bad Tim: your ass is bleeding badly; my cock is bleeding badly. If you grab my cock and slide it inside of you, it will be like injecting my blood into your blood and you will become poz and we can be together. If this is what you want, grab my cock and slide it in you now. Without hesitation I reached down and grabbed his cock and aimed it towards my hole and kissed him as he pushed his cock inside of me. He pushed it all the way in and sat there kissing me, injecting me with his positive blood. After a few minutes he began fucking me harder than ever before. Each stroke knocked my breath out and I could feel my insides ripping and the soreness of my ass intensifying. What he said was true, I was being pozzed this very moment and I wanted it, I wanted him He shot his load inside of me and collapsed on top of me catching his breath and then got up, got dressed and started to walk out and as he walked out, he said one more thing to me: Tim: now we will be together forever I thought he wanted us to be together, but it turned out he just wanted to poz me. I had no idea that was his plan the entire time. I had no idea he was pumping himself with dangerous amounts of Viagra and Cialis to get hard, it wasn’t because “I made him hard” it was the drugs. I had no idea he wasn’t married, and this was all some story that he uses to make people trust him. It was all part of a plan and it worked perfectly.

Part 3 His dad laid on his bed naked as I crawled up on his bed approaching him and when I got to his giant 10" massive cock I grabbed it and spit on it and slowly started jerking it off getting it as hard as it could go before taking the whole thing in my mouth, down my throat, there was nothing better than his bare cock. He laid there with his hand on back of my head reaffirming me, and the more he moaned, the harder I sucked, until he stopped me and told me he wanted to cum somewhere else, my heart beat grew faster hearing those words as he bent me over on his bed and approached behind me, placing one hand on my hip and the other on his massive bare cocking aiming it towards its destination. My hole easily accepted the entire cock, as slowly guided all 10" in me, like it had been there 100 times before, craving it, begging for it, awaiting his load inside of me, it slid perfectly into place. He began fucking me so hard the bed sounded like it was going to break, it was an old cheap bed, so I was surprised to see it handle such rigorous fucking, he fucked me like a dog, just hard and fast fucking, pounding me with every thing he had, but then a loud noise interrupted us and it just grew louder and louder. It was my phone, I reached for it and realized I was back in my bed... alone. It was all a dream. The next weekend came and I made up some canned excuse as to why I couldn't come back, which Colby pretended to be ok with, but with this being the first weekend I hadn't came to visit, you could tell he was a little bit suspicious. And when the following weekend approached and I started to drop hints that I wasn't going to come again: Me: Man work is so crazy, I have so much i need to do to get caught up Colby: I am sorry to hear that, you're still coming here this weekend right? Me: yeah, its just....I don't know I really have a lot to do Colby: that is two weekends in a row. I really want to see you? Me: I know Colby: Can you not work from here Me: Its just hard to concentrate Colby: baby please....please Colby and I talked every day, so I didn't think that he knew what happened, but i was still scared/nervous to be back in that apartment. I am not exactly sure what i was so nervous about since i was pretty confident that Colby didn't know. Maybe i was nervous about seeing his dad, even worse, what If i was nervous because I WANTED to see his dad. Colby and I talked every night, but almost every night I jerked off thinking about his dad! What had I got myself into, he was all I could think about. I couldn't get his strength, the force and control he took of the situation, feeling so dominated, so completely under his control, willingly under his control. The thought of him luring me into his room and throwing me on to his bed crawled on top of me. What would I do if the head of his huge bare cock pushed against my hole, would i try to stop him, would i let him continue? The thought was so exciting, and got me so hard that i looked forward to getting home in the evening and jerking off fantasizing about him rolling me over on my stomach and mounting on top of me thrusting his bare cock inside of me, making me beg him to cum inside of me. But every night after I jerked off I felt terrible about it. Maybe a big part of me not wanting to come see Colby was guilt. Cheating is one thing, but cheating on this guy you say you love, with his dad! Not just his dad, but his dad that has caused him so much emotional harm. This would kill him and i felt like such a horrible person for doing this to him, but again the next night i would rush home and jerk off thinking about him. I felt so bad, i really didn't want to hurt Colby so maybe i was just trying to distance myself from the whole thing. Nevertheless, I found myself back in Dallas the next weekend and Friday night we went to dinner when i got to town and then back to his apartment, he kept saying how excited he was and how it had been too long and he couldn't wait to get in bed, but i was still nervous and feeling guilty. When we got to his apartment, i immediately locked eyes with his dad's door and nothing, he didn't come out or anything, we went straight back to the bedroom and i fumbled my way through sex. I was nervous, i kept picturing his dad which made me feel horrible. It took me a while to cum, there were even a few times I started to lose my erection, which made me even more nervous, I was a paranoid wreck! The weekend went by without anything bad happening, I left early Sunday and never saw his dad. I felt like I wasn't able to relax until the drive home. His dad never came out and said anything, Colby didn't know and his dad wasn't trying to make a scene, he wasn't intentionally trying to come between us. I came back the next weekend and was a lot more relaxed, things seemed to be going back to normal for Colby and I, but still almost every night I was home, I would jerk off thinking about his dad. It had been almost a month since I had given his dad the blow job, the nervousness had subsided and but the desire to do it again was getting louder. Jerking off wasn't pacifying the desire anymore. I took off Friday and decided to go to Colby's on Thursday night, knowing Colby had to work Friday, but I tried so hard to convince myself that I wasn't going there to see his dad and that I wouldn't see him. I was taking off Friday, so I could surprise Colby, nothing to do with his father. But I was having a hard time making myself believe it. Friday morning when Colby left for work, I couldn't go back to sleep, I just laid there with two voices whispering in my ears. One voice telling me how bad, dangerous, selfish this was and another voice telling me that nobody will know so it wont hurt anyone. For about an hour I laid there trying to convince myself both ways, to go out there naked like last time and on the other hand to stay in the room. I finally compromised, and decided that I would get up and get dressed and go to the gym and then if after the gym and breakfast, if I still wanted to do something, Then I could try. The idea seemed good, so I got up and got dressed and started to walk out. When I left the bedroom my eyes immediately went to his bedroom door to see if it opened, part of me hoping that it would and part of me hoping that it wouldn't. I made it to the front door and had my hand on the door handle and then stopped. I heard a voice in my head "you should probably go grab a bottle of water out of the refrigerator", but there was another voice, a quieter voice "you're lying to yourself, you have water, you can get water at the gym, leave now!". As soon as I opened the door to the refrigerator to grab a water, I heard a noise behind me, I turned to see his bedroom door opened. I couldn't see him, he just opened the door. I stood there for a second unsure what to do, my heart was pounding. I slowly took a few steps back trying to see further into his room. With one step I could see the corner of his bed, with another step I could see his foot in the corner of his bed, with another step I could see his lower body on the bed as he laid there on top of the covers naked playing with his cock in his hand, and with one last step I could see him. Laying there on top of the bed, legs spread wide, with one hand behind his head and the other hand holding his cock. I stood there as we stared at each other until he raised his hand off his cock and motioned for me to come to him. Without looking away I sat the bottle of water down on the counter and proceeded to his room. I got in the room and shut the door behind me. Him: take off your clothes I immediately did as i was told and stripped down Him: were you trying to run off without coming to see me? You know better than that Me: (Studdering) no, I was just going to run to the gym real quick Him: Yeah, then you can come back here and get a huge load of protein down your throat Him: grab that lube off the dresser and bring it over here I looked over to the dresser that was covered in miscellaneous items and found the bottle of lube and and looked back to him as he gestured it was the right bottle. Him: Come over here and...( he gestured to his rock hard cock) I crawled up on the bed and squirted some of the lube on my hand and proceeded to rub it on his cock and started to jerk him off, but he stopped me and started pulling me on top of him. It wasn't until this point that I realized he was about to fuck me raw, I cant hardly explain the emotions going through my head, excitement, fear, desire. But he pulled me to where I was straddling on top of his rock hard cock and then with both of his hands on my ass checks he started pulling me back and forth, sliding on top of his cock back and forth down my taint. Him: (moaning) oh yeah, ride that dick mother fucker.. get it you fucking slut. You want it dont you Him: Tell me how bad you want it mother fucker Me: I want it, I fucking want it so bad at this point he pulled me down towards him and he started kissing me, and when he pulled me down the head of his cock slid back from my taint towards my ass. The thought of it being so close drove me wild so I started grinding on it, playing with the loaded gun, wanting to see what it felt like to have close to my hole. He realized what i was doing and immediately stopped kissing me. he threw me off of him onto my back as he rolled over on top of me. Him: you trying to get me to fuck you, you little fucking bitch? Him: you think i am going to fuck you and let you get my son infected! He put his hand on my throat and the other hand on the bed and started grinding real hard, with his cock rubbing against my lower stomach, the friction against my cock made me cum pretty fast, but he wasn't done. He was pumping so hard me head was beating against the headboard as the bed was rocking back and forth, it was an older cheap bed so it made a lot of noise and i thought for sure it would break, but then as quickly as it started he shot his load all over my dick. He collapsed on top of me for a second catching his breath and then rolled off onto his back: Him: you can go to the gym now I laid there for a second catching my breath Him: i'm saying get out I quickly got up and grabbed my clothes and started to walk out when i heard him say: Him: hey bring me a $250 prepaid card when you come back and ill let you suck this dick one more time. I stood there for a second in disbelief at what I had just heard, which he did not seem to appreciate Him: did you hear me! Me: yes Him: good, now get out of here I went to the gym and my mind was just thinking about what had just happened and i couldn't really focus so i just walked on the treadmill for about an hour and left. I went and grabbed something to eat and then yes, i went and grabbed a prepaid credit card for $250. I was heading back to the apartment when Colby called: Colby: Hey what you doing? Me: Nothing, what about you? Colby: wondering if you wanted to grab lunch I was torn here, I really wanted to go back to the apartment for round 2, but how shitty would that be. Colby: you there? Me: yeah, sorry i'm just getting ready to head to the gym? how about dinner and drinks? Colby: ok fine, i just wanted to see you I might be a worse person than his dad is. Here is this good guy, who completely trusts me and opens up to me about how much his dad hurt him and then here I am lying to him so I can go to his house and fuck around with his dad. I parked at the apartment and got out of the car and walked towards the apartment and I remember thinking how bad of a person I was. I no longer had 2 voices whispering in my ear, just one voice telling me how bad I was, but it didn't stop me. I wanted it too bad. I got in the apartment and went to his dad's door and knocked. He opened the door, standing there in his boxers Him: you get that card? Me: yeah (as i pulled the card out of my pocket and handed it to him) Him: good deal, $250? Me: yeah Him: ok, come on but this time he stepped out of the bedroom and went to the couch, this is the first time i had seen anyone use the couch or the living room at all. He sat down and grabbed the remote and turned on the tv. Him: come here I walked over to where he was and he pulled his cock out of his boxers Him: here you go, get your $250 worth Me: out here? Him: (gesturing to his cock) get to it I got down on my knees between his leg and grabbed his limp cock and started sucking it. Taking turns between sucking and jerking it off, but it took forever my jaw was starting to hurt so i started jerking him off and spitting on his cock for lube, but he still didnt cum Me: what do you want me to do HIm: take off your clothes So i stood up and took off my clothes Him: go to my room and get the lube So i ran into his room and grabbed the lube and came back out. He took the lube and squirted into his hands and lubed up his cock. He then moved me down and bent me over the couch, i looked over my shoulder to see him coming up behind me, he grabbed the lube and spread it down my ass crack and between my legs, he then pulled my two legs together with his legs outside of mine. I watched as he mounted me, with one hand on my hips and the other on his cock, as he slid is cock between my legs, he told me to keep my legs tight as he began to fuck my legs. His cock was coming between my legs rubbing up against my cock and my lower stomach. He fucked me like that for a few strokes but it wasn't working out the way he wanted and stopped, he grabbed his cock and put it right up to my hole Him: fuck fuck fuck! You need to go get some condoms cause i am ready to tear this ass up! I was so turned on, i didn't care about anything else, i started moving my hips and pushing back against his cock and at first he started to go with it, i felt him push his cock in my hole for a half a second, not even getting his head all the way in me and then stopped screaming out FUCK!! He then turned me around to where i was sitting on the ground with my legs straight out in front of me with my back up against the bottom of the couch. He got up on one knee and with the other leg to the side and pushed his cock right up to my face and grabbed the back of my head with one hand and with the other aimed his cock to my face and in my mouth. I put one hand on his ass cheek and the other on his knee trying to brace myself as he began to anger fuck my face. He had both hands behind my head. I was gagging so hard that i had to use one hand to grab his cock to stop it from going so far down my throat as he continued fucking my face, it wasn't long though before he shoved his cock as deep as he could down my throat and started pumping out cum down my throat as i gagged on his rock hard cock. He then made me suck all the cum off his cock and watched me swallow every drop of it. Then he just stood up and walked to his room and shut his door, as i just sat there on the floor practically crying from gagging so hard. and it all hit me at once, I was the bad person in this story, not his dad. Its funny how lust can make you lose your moral compass. To where you dont care about anything but your sexual desires, you dont care who you hurt or what the costs are and then as quickly as you blow your load you come rushing back to reality, but it's too late, you've already made your decision. When I was getting ready to head back home on Sunday, Colby told me to let him know the next time I took off on Friday so he would take off too, so we could spend the day together. This pretty much ruined my chances of seeing his dad again, since Friday's while he was at work was the only time his dad and I had the chance to meet. 4 Weeks had gone by and I hadn't seen his dad at all, he could have been dead and I wouldn't have known. Things were good with Colby and I, but there was a deep sexual desire that had been awoken inside that was hungry and needed to be fed and again, Jerking off wasn't satisfying the craving anymore. Saturday night, we had a big halloween party to go to with Colby's friends, we both definitely drank too much, but Colby more than I, we got back to his apartment pretty late and didn't even have sex, he passed out cold. I was laying there drunk and thought it would be a good idea to go get some water, so as quiet as possible, I slipped out of the bed and quietly opened and closed the bedroom door and tip-toed down the hallway towards the kitchen, but I ended up going right past the kitchen to his bedroom door. I quietly knocked on the door but no answer, I knocked a little louder and again a little louder and I heard some movement behind the door and footsteps approaching and then the door cracked open to see his dad peak around the corner of the door and with a surprised almost what-the-fuck-are-you-doing look. Me: Hey Him: what the fuck are you thinking Me: he is passed out drunk Him: go away He started to shut to door, but i quickly put him hand up and stopped him Me: he is passed out, he isn't going to wake up You could tell he seemed frustrated, he wanted it, but thought it was too risky and made him nervous. He wanted to say no, but he wanted me too, so he slowly opened the door. I walked in the room as he slowly and cautiously closed the door. The room was only light by a small tv playing some random tv show. I turned to face him and slid my shorts down to the ground and turned and crawled on the bed. I laid there on the bed facing him with my legs spread awaiting him. Even in the low-light i could tell he was nervous as he slid off his boxers and crawled on the bed on top of me. I immediately wrapped my arms around him and kissed him, he laid down on top of me kissing me and i could fell his cock getting harder and harder, fuck i wanted him so bad that i whispered in his ear, "I fucking want you". My hand fumbled over his night stand knocking things off on the floor making noise until i found a tube of lube. I squirted some in my hand and reached down to his cock, but he stopped me. Him: Hold on.... Me: its ok (as i proceeded to rub the lube on his cock and my hole) Him: FUCK!! Me: its ok, I want you to do it He looked as though he didn't have the will power to fight it and just gave in, for a second he almost looked sad before he grabbed my leg behind my knee, bending my knee, adjust my hips giving him access to my hole. He made a small thrust of his hips and I felt it, the head of his cock pushing against my ass crack, I tried to rotate my hips more and soon it had found him mark, but he stopped. You could see it in his face, he had is own internal battle going on. Now I dont know if this was out of the goodness of his own heart or preservation. if i suddenly became poz, his son would no-doubly suspect him and he would be kicked out and have nowhere to go, but back to jail. But all of this came to crashing stop with the most sobering sound I had ever heard, the front door open and close, followed by a knock on the bedroom door. We laid there naked with him on top of me, with his cock pushing up against my hole frozen, trying not to make a sound, hoping he would think his dad was sleeping and go away, but that is not the case. He slightly pushed open the door and poked his head in and the most horrifying sound I have ever heard followed: Colby: Dad, you awake!

PART 2 thump-thump Thump-Thump Thump-Thump THUMP-THUMP THUMP-THUMP THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP! My heart was pounding out of my chest as I stood there just watching him. My hands were shaking, my breathing was getting more and more erratic, I felt frozen, like I couldn't move, couldn't speak.... just standing there frozen with fear and excitement. Like reading a label on a pack of cigarettes, "Warning this Cock may Cause DEATH or Serious Injury", an obvious warning that would make most other guys run without a second thought. And Colby!! We just told each other last night that we loved each other, he opened up about all the trauma this man has caused him, this would kill him! Someone I genuinely care about and this monster who has caused him so much harm and here I am right in the middle and make no mistake, this guy's intentions are not good, you're about to walk into a haunted house and monster is very real and very dangerous. My mind, my conscious, every ounce of my survival instinct is screaming "you knew exactly what you were doing when you made the conscious decision to put your pants back down on the ground and come out here like this, but now your little dark fantasy is becoming all too real, you are face to face with death RUN for life!!". But still, I stand here frozen, unable to pull myself away, unable to look away, and still holding this damn orange juice? But then, like out of a dark deep cave within, came another voice. A voice so powerful that the other voices silenced in its presence. A voice that could not be pacified or intimidated by warnings, an entity that needed to feed was consuming my being. Adrenaline began to course through my veins like a drug, my heart hit so hard I could swear you could hear it, and like a sailor being lured to his death by the temptation of the Siren, I took a step towards the monster's lair. I don't even know if I was in control anymore. It was as if everything survival instinct I had left my body and the only thing left was pure carnal, animalistic lust. An all-consuming desire that knew what it wanted, and didn't care about the cost. I couldn't take my eyes off of him and seeing how is demeanor changed when I took that first step, he KNEW he had won. It did not matter how evil his intentions where, I was powerless, under his control he had his victim in his web. I entered his room and he told me to shut the door behind him, I couldn't speak, but I did as he said and shut the door. He sat there 3 feet from me with his cock in hand as I stood there completely naked like a scared little kid. He could definitely sense my fear and it seemed to empower him, make him harder and bolder, his voice came more commanding, knowing I was his now. Him: come here I slowly approached him, looking each other in the eyes as he licked his lips like a lion before consuming a young gazelle. Him: Get on your knees I started to get on my knees and soon felt his hand on my shoulder pulling me into him as his hand slid to the top of my head, feeling his firm hand grasp the hair on the back of my head pulling my head down and with his other hand aiming his large cock to my mouth. I opened my mouth as it was shoved inside, I tried to take it all, but having never done this before, I was struggling, but he kept pushing my head down and shoving his cock deeper as I kept gagging over and over, soon he had both hands on the back of my head pulling my head down on his cock as he forcibly fucked my face. He was pulling down with such force, I had to use one hand to brace myself and keep myself upright and the other I reached up to hold the base of his cock, thinking maybe that would stop so much of his cock from going down my throat helping me to breathe. Him: You're such a fucking whore, I knew you wanted this. Oh, you're going to be my little bitch from now on aren't you. Him: FUCKING ANSWER ME!! he let up on the back of my head allowing me to raise my head up just enough to get his cock out of my mouth. With slobber dripping from my mouth to his cock i tried to answer him Me: (almost crying, I was able to mumble out) Yes Him: Fucking right, now get back to work as he pulled my head back down on his cock, I wasn't fully prepared so when he pulled my head down his cock went deeper down my throat than before and gagged and almost threw up, but that didn't seem to stop him. Him: oh fuck yeah... It has been too long, you're going to get your load real quick this time Him: jerk that mother fucker! He let up a little, allowing me to pull my head up and jerk him off more and it wasn't long before he started moaning and repeating "Oh fuck" and suddenly like a volcano erupting he started shooting his load in the back of my throat, at first his cum was coming out of my mouth Him: you better fucking swallow that shit mother fucker (as he forcibly shoved his cock deeper down my throat) I started to gag again, but quickly closed my lips tightly around his cock and tried swallowing as much as possible. He kept moaning "Fuck yeah! Oh Fuck...Oh Fuck, you fucking slut bitch" as the cum kept spewing out of his cock down my throat and down his cock. After he finished he fell back on the bed breathing heavily. Him: Man, that is the first action i have had in years! Damn I needed that I just kind of sat there on my knees, completely lost. This is the first time I had ever been in a situation like that, I have always been the top, or the one getting blown or with a woman, it was completely new to me and i felt so, so naked kneeling there, cum dripping down my mouth and running down my neck and chest. Him: Fuck man, how are we going to tell Colby about this? I panicked when i heard that, immediately reality came flooding back. Me: (Stuttering out) I... I.... I Him: what you didn't want to tell him about this? You're going to lie to my son? and worse, you want to make me lie to my son Me: I don't know, i hadn't thought about it Him: well look man, i can maybe keep this a secret, but i am not comfortable with it. Me: Thank you so much! Him: yeah, i don't like lying to my boy so i am going to need something from you Me: of course, what do you want? Him: Man you know i cant get out of here and my son wont allow me to have guests, thinks i am going to be doing drugs or something, so you're going to have to keep this up. I haven't had action from another person in years! Me: i'm not sure i understand Him: You can fuck my son, but you only suck my dick! Is that clear enough Me: Yeah! I mean, i dont know if we should do this again. Him: Look mother fucker! You want me to keep this a secret, then you're going to have to work for it. I know a slut when i see one, i saw you eye'n my dick. Now get the fuck out of here and go jerk off and if you ain't getting on your knees again soon, i may just have to let Colby know about how you came into my room naked and just took my dick like a ho! I started to fumble my way out of the room, rushing back to my room as i heard him say: Him: oh yeah! Colby told me you were rich, so maybe you should be dropping off some cash for me too, after all, we don't want colby to find out about this. Right then, I immediately knew i had been played. He knew I had money, and was working to get it. That is what it was all about. Then panicked, i started to google, "Can you get HIV from oral Sex" and found out that it was very rare and it was most common for bottoms to get HIV from a HIV positive top. What the fuck did I just get myself into, what was he going to do. His entire plan was to get me in this situation so he could manipulate me however he wanted, he basically had me backed against a corner. What could i do, tell Colby, not only would he break up with me, but that would kill him. Did i have any other options. I just laid there on the bed naked freaking out, what the hell was i going to do! He owned me now, he was going to make me pay him to suck his dick! His huge black dirty fucking dick and i had to pay him money for it. I had to pay this dirty mother fucker money so he could shoot his dirty disease filled load down my throat, and shove his giant cock inside me. That giant dirty cock just oozing out dirty cum, pumping his load down my throat, again and again. I went from panicking to getting hard, thinking part of me didn't want colby to know, because i wanted to be in this situation. What was this situation going to bring on me.....

Thank you! I really appreciate the comment! and might be incredibly tempting if i was in Wisconsin! But would love to chat though, if you're cool with that.

Nailed it! Great analogy. the cigarette, so dangerous, so appealing, so addicting.

The Fall Part 1 Ok, about me, well I grew up in a small town in Texas. I wouldn’t say I was poor, because we always had food, but we were not rich. Not that anyone in the small town would be considered rich. Even though we were some of the poorer people, I always had friends, I was very gregarious and personable, and I was good at football and girls always liked me, so making friends just came naturally. After high school I went to college and just found myself, I had a great time, made great grades and my future just fell before me. After college I got into medical sales, and just found my calling and climbed the Corp ladder very fast. Bringing us to today, I live in Austin, I am a medical sales manager for a medical equipment manufacturer and have made over $500,000 a year for the last 3 years. I far cry from how I grew up. Life was great. I was no big deal for me to go out on a Saturday night and drop over $1,000 on dinner and drinks. I worked hard and played hard. I had a nice sports car but drove a tesla for a work car. I had a very nice apartment downtown Austin and absolutely loved life. On a random Tuesday night, I am in Dallas at a networking event and run across an old friend of mine, Colby, well not really a friend, we went to high school together. Actually, I don’t know if we had ever talked. He was really quiet, and a lot of people made fun of him calling him gay and queer, not than anyone knew if he was gay, but remember small town. But nevertheless, it was random to see someone from the town we grew up in. after all I graduated with less than 100 people, very small town, so we were both surprised to see each other. I came up and introduced myself and he remembered who I was he was surprised that I remembered him. We spent most of the evening catching up. He moved to Dallas immediately after high school graduation and lived here ever since. The night flew buy, but eventually I had to leave, and we said our goodbyes. Laying in bed around 1:30 in the morning, I see a notification come across my phone, and he had sent me a FB request, I immediately accepted it and shortly after got another “Ding”. He sent me a message: Colby: Just wanted to say it was good seeing you tonight Me: It was, definitely made the night more fun than I was expecting Colby: oh, I wasn’t expecting you to respond tonight. Colby: but yes, I really enjoyed it Colby: you come here often lol Me: Not really, I mostly cover Austin and San Antonio, Dallas isn’t in my area. Colby: too bad, I was hoping we could hang out Me: You ever in Austin? Colby: no, I am kind of grounded here in Dallas Me: Grounded?? Parole Colby: lol, no! it’s a long story for another day We ended up chatting for over an hour that night until I passed out. Over the next few weeks, we talked about every day and grew pretty close. It wasn’t until about 3 weeks later that he told me that he was gay: Me: random, I was invited to attend a meeting with our team in Thursday Colby: Of course it would be Thursday Me: why? Colby: me and my boyfriend have plans with friends Me: Boyfriend? I had no idea Colby: no idea I was gay or that I was seeing someone Me: lol, both Colby: omg! Your gaydar is broken honey Me: lol, yeah I had no idea Colby: is that a problem? Me: no, not a problem, just didn’t know Colby: good! I enjoy talking with you Me: Me too! Colby: So come another night Me: I may not come, its not normally something I would attend in person Colby: so you were making a special trip for me? Me: lol Colby: Come Me: you wont even be there Colby: we could meet up for a drink afterwards Me: Boyfriend would love that Colby: your straight, its not cheating Me: ditching your boyfriend for anyone would probably upset him Colby: Just come, I want to see you Me: we will see 😉 I was definitely very confused by what was going on, now I’m not stupid, I have always known I was attracted to both boys and girls, but I have never even remotely given any sexual attention or flirted with a guy, and here I am just talking to this guy all the time and ignoring most other things and making a special trip just to see him, what was happening? I didn’t know, but I know I was enjoying it and besides, were just friends. I ended up going to Dallas for the meeting and got a hotel to stay the night rather than driving back. Me: Im on my way to Dallas Colby: Yay! I cant wait to see you! Me: Me too! Colby: im so excited, I might kiss you! Me: you better get me a drink first lol Colby: deal! Colby: where are you staying Me: The Adolphus downtown Colby: fancy pants! Me: lol, its close to our office Colby: ok, I will come by around 10? Me: See you then All day long, I was anxiously excited, what was happening, what where his expectations, he knows I’m straight, is he really this excited to see me just as friends, is he thinking more will happen. My mind rushed all day, but it didn’t change the fact that I was excited to be there. He practically messaged me the entire night, which im sure went over great with his boyfriend, but I really didn’t care, I was happy. About 10:30 he showed up and met me in the lobby and told me we are going to the club. We walked to a night club close by and had a great night Colby: lets get you that drink I owe you Me: lol Colby: I am going to kiss you later Me: better make it two drinks After a couple drinks Colby: lets dance Me: I don’t know Colby: come on He stood up and grabbed me by the hand and pulled me out on the dancefloor and the night flew by drinks, dancing more and more touching Around 1:00am Colby: you ready to go Me: sure Colby: I’m ready to get out of here, its too loud We walked back to my hotel and in the lobby we were saying goodbye and there was the awkward silence, we both knew what the other was thinking. There was no “he thinks im straight” we were both thinking the same thing right now, and somehow I knew he wouldn’t make the move, if I wanted it to happen, it would have to be me. My heart was pounding through my chest. I was so torn on what to do, my entire life, I had hidden this away and here I am just fully going with it. Me: you want to come up? He didn’t even say anything, he just looked me in the eyes and nodded his head yes. It was that look that we both knew what was about to happen. As soon as we got on the elevator he kissed me, that’s for the drinks he said. We got to the room and it didn’t take long before he kissed me again, which quickly escalated into being on the bed and clothes coming off as we rolled around the bed in the covers. When his mouth hit my rock hard cock I knew I had made the right decision, it was the best blow job I had ever had. He quickly got up and grabbed the lotion out of the bathroom and a condom he crawled back on top of me looked up at me as he slid the condom on my rock hard cock, he slowly crawled up and started to kiss my neck and whispered “I want you in me so fucking bad” as he reached around and grabbed my cock and aimed it towards his hole and slide down on it. There it was, I officially lost my gay virginity and it was amazing, better than I could have imagined. The intensity the passion, was more than I describe. It didn’t take me long to cum and when I did, he leaned over and kissed me and said, we have to do that again! And then he got up and got dressed Me: where are you going? Colby: I have to go home Me: to your boyfriend? Colby: jealous already? Me: no Colby: laughed and smiled, I have to be at work at 6am, so I need to get home to try and get 2 hours of sleep Me: 6am! Wow that sucks! He crawled on the bed and kissed me really deeply Colby: you better come back soon, I want that great cock again Over the next week, we chatted a lot, and the chat had changed, it was very flirtatious, very sexual, very emotional, so of course it wasn’t long before I came back. Over the next couple months, I went to Dallas about once per week and would usually stay Friday and Saturday night, we would go out and have amazing sex, but he would always leave, which was definitely sending off red flags. After about 3 months, we were laying in bed after having sex and he was laying there with his head on my chest and said Colby: what are we? Me: what do you mean? Colby: exactly what I asked, what are we? Me: don’t you have a boyfriend Colby: I could end that Me: do you want to end that? Colby: do you want me to end that? Me: maybe Colby: you’re still in the closet though, how would that work? Me: you go home every night, so how does that work? Colby: come stay the night with me Me: wont your boyfriend get upset Colby: not if you’re my boyfriend Me: would you be my boyfriend Colby: no Me: what?!? Colby: come back next weekend and I will be single and you can ask me again Me: ok, but we are staying the night Colby: you can come stay at my apartment The next weekend, I came back the happiest I can remember being, we went to dinner at a nice restaurant and I officially asked him to be my boyfriend, he immediately wanted to get the ticket and go home, and I had no problem with that. We got to his apartment, which was a little more rundown that I had expected. Definitely a low-income housing, which I was not expecting at all. We got in his apartment, which was very clean and went to his room and started to make love, not sex, make love. When he grabbed the lube he crawled on top of me and said: Colby: If were boyfriend and boyfriend, I want you to cum inside me, as long as you are sleeping with anyone else, is that good with you? Me: yeah And he started lubing up my bare cock and slid down on it and it was even better than before, I had no idea how much bare sex felt than protected sex. We had sex multiple times that night and by the end of the night, he told me I scared him because he thought he was falling for me and then fell asleep. The next morning I got up and he was gone, so I went to the kitchen naked to get something to drink. As I was standing at the fridge, I heard a noise behind me and turned to see a tall black naked man standing in a door to another bedroom staring at me. I almost dropped my cup and stood there speechless as he approached me. I couldn’t help but notice his giant cock just hanging there, I definitely looked to long and by the time I realized I was staring and looked back up he was grinning as he approached. He got within 1 foot of my face and just stood there and then just made a moaning sound. Random guy: nice And then he rubbed up against me as he reached in and grabbed the carton of orange juice and took a huge drink straight from the carton and then set it back in the fridge Random guy: I hope to see you around more And then walked off. As soon as he got in his room, I ran back to the bedroom and shut the door. But the image of that cock was burned in my mind and the adrenaline rush had my heart pounding, I was so excited and turned on and couldn’t get his cock out of my mind. Shortly after, Colby opened the bedroom door Colby: I got coffee and bagels Me: who the hell is the other guy in there? Colby: oh, you saw him? Me: yeah, I about had a heart attack Colby: it’s my dad Me: your dad? Why didn’t you tell me he was in there Colby: long story Me: and you’re not going to tell me? Colby: My dad left home when I was in elementary school, just disappeared and then about 2 years ago, I get a call from a parole officer that my dad has the option for house arrest if he has a place to go, and I must be here every morning to verify he is here. Me: I am so sorry, I didn’t know Colby: I know, I should have told you. But how do you say, “oh by the way my dad was realized from prison for robbery, reckless endangerment for having sex with people without telling them had HIV, herpes, syphilis and every other fucking std a person can have, prostitution, assault and battery. Yeah, how do I say that”. Me: I am sorry, I had no idea Colby: I know, I’m not mad at you, I just hate him being here. Leaving me when I am so young and look at the person he is, who the fuck goes around fucking people and trying to give them aids! He is just a piece of shit and for some reason I felt obligated to let him stay here. Colby: just stay away from him, please. I don’t even talk to him, he stays in his room, I stay in my room. He is disgusting to me. The parole officer told me that when they arrested him, he was about 120 lbs., just eaten up with diseases and track marks from shooting up drugs, sharing needles with people and then banging dudes from money and drugs and just giving random guys aids! He has 1 more year here and then he is gone, and I hope to never see him again. Colby: please just stay away from him, I don’t trust him. I don’t know what he would do, but I just absolutely don’t trust him Me: don’t worry, I am with you, I will be where you are Colby: I know this is a lot to just take in, that’s why I hide it. I am ashamed Me: its ok, its ok Over the next couple of months, things were great, I would stay with him every weekend and then go back to work during the week and we would talk most days and for hours at night, and life was really good, I was really happy. I hadn’t really come out to my family, friends, work or on social media, but in Dallas it was completely different. It was like I had two lives, a work life in Austin and a social life in Dallas. On our 6 month anniversary of dating, I took Friday off and showed up on Thursday night and took him out to dinner at a nice restaurant and had a few drinks and we went back to his place and while we were having sex he stopped and told me that he loved me, I told him that I loved him too and it was great, it felt great. I don’t know how else to describe it, I was happy and was in love. The next morning, I woke up and he was gone to work, so I got up and was going to go into the kitchen to grab something to drink and remembering last time, I reached down to grab my pants to put them on, but when I grabbed them, I suddenly stopped and paused for a second and then set the pants back down. I opened the bedroom door and walked to the kitchen to get something to drink, I kept an eye on his door, but it was closed. I opened the fridge and grabbed the orange juice and took out the carton and then I heard a noise behind me. I stood there froze with the orange juice in my hand with my back to the door. My heart was pounding out of my chest, fear, excitement, im not sure which was the most prominent feeling. Then I heard a deep scratchy voice directly behind me: Him: I knew you would come out here this morning Me: unable to speak a word He takes a step closer; I can feel his breath on the back of my neck. I feel like my heart is going to rip out of my chest. Then I feel his cock press against my bare ass cheeks, and I tense up stepping away and almost instantly I feel his firm hand grab my hip and pull me into him, feeling his cock pressed up against me, I’m getting hard now, and I can’t control it Him: what are you so nervous about? I stay there, I don’t try to get away, I just freeze feeling his cock Him: I knew you fucking wanted it Me: Completely speechless, just trying to breath Him: Nobody will be home for hours, bring me that orange juice And he walks away. After about 10 seconds, I slowly turn around to see him completely naked walking into his bedroom. He leaves the door open and turns facing me and sits down on the bed with his legs spread wide open and his cock hanging there. He grabs his cock in his hands and starts slowly jerking it looking directly at me.

THE MOUSE TRAP There are 2 types of mice that get bit by a mouse trap, the mouse that wants the prize so bad they’re willing the risk their lives to get it and those that enjoy the game, the thrill, the risk of the trap itself. Throughout high school I mowed lawns to make money, hard work, but decent money. I started it all on my own, and grew up to just under 20 lawns, which kept me very busy. I got most of my yards going door-to-door and asking and from referrals, I always did a great job and it may have helped that I always mowed with my shirt off to get a tan. One day I was going down a new street doing my door-to-door to get some new lawns, when I came to one door and an older gentlemen answered the door. He was very polite and invited me inside and offered me something cool to drink. We sat at the kitchen table as he brought me a glass of iced tea. I thought it was kind of strange when he said he saw me the other day and was hoping I could service his lawn as well, but I was excited to get a new customer. He was very chatty and handsy, and it was hard to get out of the house, but nevertheless, we scheduled to mow the lawn in a couple of days. A couple of days later, I showed up, and as usual, I was shirtless and sweaty. The entire time I was mowing, he was outside watching and as soon as I finished, he invited me in for some iced tea. This happened every time I mowed and every time it would be very difficult to get out of there because he was so chatty and every time I came, he got more handsy with me. Again, I am young and naïve here. The summer came to an end and the last mowing, it was cooler, and I had a shirt on and as usual he invited me and asked why I had my shirt on, and told me that he was sure a lot of people were upset about that in a joking manner. You could easily tell he was not happy that this was the last time I would be there for the year, and he made it extremely difficult to leave, he held my hand as I got up, stood in front of the exit, everything short of holding me down. I wasn’t too surprised when he started texting me in the fall to come rake leaves and clean up around the yard, with lawns being done, this was a great source of income. He had me over there about every other week in the fall, when winter came, he asked about helping him move furniture around. I started enjoying talking to him and hanging out and since I didn’t have much to do that time of year, I didn’t mind. New Years Eve he told me he was having friends over and wanted me to come by and help him set up, and when I got there you could tell he was very excited. As soon as I opened the door he answered with an excited voice and grabbed me by the hand and pulled me down a dark hallway into a room, and as I entered, I realized was his bedroom. He told me to sit on the edge of the bed, he had something to show me. He told me how excited he was about his party and had to show someone his outfit for the night. He started undressing right in front of me, I immediately stood up and said “sorry, I can hang out in the hall”. He grabbed me by the hand and said it was ok, he turned to the bedroom door and shut it and turned back to me saying it was ok, he just wanted to change quick. He started undressing “this doesn’t make you uncomfortable, does it?” I really didn’t know what to say, but I was very nervous, he started to approach me as I stood there at the edge of his bed. Him: You’re shaking. Are you okay? Me: yeah, just…. Him: Relax, its ok Me: Him: (laughs) let me help you (as he reaches down and starts to unbutton my pants” Me: (I stop him) I cant do that Him: It’s ok, relax (he unzips my pants and pull out my cock which was getting hard as he rubbed it) Him: it’s ok, it’s ok Me: I just stood there shaking in my boots Him: (drops to his knees and takes my cock in his mouth) I just stood there in shock as my cock got harder and harder, I stood there in shock looking down as this old man was touching me like this. I was so confused, but it felt so good. Of course, it didn’t take long before I shot my load down his throat, and he swallowed it all. He stood up and smiled at me and told me not to worry, its our secret. I almost ran out of the house so confused as to what had just happened. I went home and didn’t leave my room the rest of the day. I didn’t hear from him again until next spring when he text me: Him: You going to service me again this year? Me: Your lawn? Him: Sure Me: yes, I started up last week, when will your lawn be ready? Him: how soon can you get here? Me: tomorrow? Him: perfect The next day I showed up and mowed his lawn and as usual, he was outside waiting on me and asked me to come inside. I told him I was in a hurry, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. I came inside and sat at the kitchen table, he sat right next to me and had his hand on my thigh. He noticed how nervous I was as he moved his hand higher and higher on my leg. Him: I had a lof of fun on new years (his hand goes higher) Me: (sitting there shaking) Him: (moving his hand to my mid-thigh) do you like this? Me: (shaking not able to speak) Him: (Laughs) to excited to talk? Let me check (as he moves his hand to my upper thigh) Him: (rubbing my cock) oh, I think someone likes me He stood up and grabbed my hand and pulled me up from the chair, he smiled at me and pulled me into him and whispered to me” you’re so fucking hard for me, aren’t you?” He pulled me down the hallway and into the bedroom and shut the door behind us. He went and laid down on the bed and: Him: come here Me: (stuttering) I should really go Him: it’s ok. Im not going to tell anyone Me: I don’t know… I don’t know what to do Him: come here for 1 minute and then you can leave I sat down on the edge of the bed and he approached me and started rubbing my leg and kept reaffirming that it was ok. He pulled me down so that I was laying on my back and he crawled on top of me between my legs and worked his way down to unbutton my pants and pulled my cock out and started sucking my cock and working my pants off, and once he had my pants off he stood up at the end of the bed and quickly took off his clothes and laid back down on top of me and lifted my legs up worked his way to my ass hole and started eating me out and to my surprise was amazing. When he finished with my ass he rose up between my legs standing on his knees as I laid there I see him grab some lube and start to lube up his cock, he then laid back down and got between my legs and started kissing me. I felt his cock push against my hole and I freaked out. Me: hold on, stop! I cant do that Him: it’s ok relax, what is wrong? Me: I cant do that! Him: you already have, I already had it in you Me: no. you didn’t! Him: yes, the head was already inside you. We have already had sex, why stop now that it is feeling the best. Me: we just can’t Him: (pushing it back in) you know you want it Me; you’re not even wearing a condom. Him: (pushes a little deeper) its ok, you won’t get pregnant Me: I don’t want to catch anything Him: don’t worry you wont Then he leaned in and kissed me and started pushing it in more and more with mini strokes and before long he was all the way inside of me. It took a while before it felt good, but once I relaxed it felt good, really good actually. Again, I came quick, before he did. When he was about to cum, he told me: Him: I’m about to cum. oh this is going to be a huge load Him: do you want me to cum inside you? Me: (not know what to do) yes He got really tight and pushed in really deep and to my surprise this was the best part, feeling his cock explode inside of me. And he was right, it was a huge load, it felt like a river pouring out of me. That summer we had sex a lot, I got a lot better at it, and as I got better the feeling was better. I absolutely loved the feeling of his huge load shooting inside me, I have never in my life shot out as much cum as he did. After that summer I started college, and decided to go to a small university 45 minutes from home so that I could keep the lawns, so me and him kept this relationship going until my sophomore year when I stopped mowing and wanted to stay at school more. I ended up meeting a girl and kind of moved on from him. I was over 30 years older than me, so I don’t think he was too surprised or had any intentions of us being more than what we were. He never bothered me or anything like that, he was a really good guy. Life went on, I graduated college, my girlfriend became my fiancé, I got a full-time job, we were house hunting, and life just happens. She really wanted a fall wedding, so we decided to get married in early October, but she wanted a summer Bachelorrete party, so we decided to do our parties in June. She went to Vegas for the weekend, I didn’t want anything that big, I just wanted a one-night event, so me and my friends went out Friday night and did normal bachelor party stuff. They really pushed me to go out again Saturday night, but I insisted that I was too hung over and wanted to sleep, but truth is there was something else I wanted to do Saturday night. Saturday I text him completely out of the blue, it had been years since we talked, so I didn’t even know if this was still his number. Me: Hey Him: Wow! Me: lol, how are. You? Him: Good, how are you doing? Me: great! Just thinking about you Him: im ok with that Me: guess what? Him: what? Me: im getting married Him: Awesome, to the same girl? Me: yeah. Me: tonight is my last night of freedom I guess, bachelor party anyways Him: fun! Me: what are you doing tonight? Him: you inviting me to your bachelor party Me: lol, it was last night, no plans tonight Him: Im going to Spy (a gay bar/hotel) for pride event Me: OH! Was going to see what you were doing. Him: come with me Me: I don’t know, that’s pretty public Him: we can stay in the room, I have a room there tonight Me: you sure? Him: yeah Me: what time Him: be there at 9:30 Of course, I showed up and as soon as I opened the door, we were on each other. I had no idea how much I missed him, but he is like 60 now and im 23, what could we be. The sex was amazing, and I enjoyed being around him, but come on! What more could we be. I don’t, know, but I know I missed him and he missed me because we didn’t fuck, we made love. It was very passionate and slow and lots of kissing and I was craving him cumming inside of me. Afterwards he told me that he was going down to the party and wanted me to join him. I of course told him that it was too public, to which he replied that he was going to go home with someone from the bar, it could be you or someone else, so I got dressed and decided to go down with him. I immediately started drinking since I was a nervous wreck, after a few drinks I finally relaxed, but didn’t slow down from drinking. There was a guy at the party that was in leather pants, no shirt and all oiled up and tattooed up dancing on everyone. It wasn’t long before he found me and was all over me, in a very aggressive manner. He kept getting me more and more drinks and I was out on the dancefloor with him for a long time. Finally my friend came and dragged me away, he seemed very jealous, which I liked, but he was actually just giving me a warning. Him: be careful out there Me: what do you mean Him: the guy you’re dancing with is dangerous Me: dangerous? How so? Him: like slip something in your drink and date rape you and you see that tattoo on his stomach, that means he is HIV positive Me: I will be carefuil Him: watch out, he is a predator and he is hunting you now Me: I am a big boy (you could tell I was very drunk) Him: ok, I was just trying to warn you Then the predator came up behind me and grabbed my hand led me out to the dancefloor Predator: why are you talking with that old dude Me: im with him Predator: (laughs) you have to upgrade Me: Upgrade? Predator: Yeah! Not some old dude who cant get it up, you need a man I would lie if I said I wasn’t very turned on right then Predator: instead of that limp old dick, you need an 9” rock hard cock with veins pulsating all around it Me: I do? Predator: I have a room here, want to get out of here Me: I don’t know, I have been warned Predator: by some old dude who is trying to trap you He grabbed me by the hand and started leading me off, but then my friend intervened and said he needed to talk. Him: you’re too drunk, you need to go to the room Me: I’m not drunk (as I stumbled around) Him: if you want me to let you go with him, I will, but know this, you will regret it Just then predator approached us and grabbed us both. Predator: let’s go to your room Me: ok, let’s go Him: I don’t know Me: come on! Please I woke up on the floor the next morning completely dressed and couldn’t remember anything. I stood up in a fog and see my friend and the “Predator” in the bed. I felt like I was hit by a bus, I hadn’t been that hung over in a long time. I looked all over the room for my phone and when I found it I noticed I had a ton of missed calls and texts from my fiancé. I left the room in a hurry and headed home. Months went by and I never heard from my friend and I decided it was time to leave that part of my life behind me, after all I was getting married and it wasn’t fair to keep on living two lives. We were having the wedding at a nice hotel downtown; I had room to myself the night before the wedding and after the rehearsal dinner and drinks I went to the room to work on my vows. It was my last night as a single man, suddenly the thought hit me “what about one more night, one more time with one more night of passion”. It was very risky, since the hotel was full of friends and family and having some random guy come to my room. Pretty stupid idea I told myself. My friends, fiancés’ family, my MOM could all come to my door to see me tonight, so this was a terrible idea, but… Me: Hey there Him: It’s the married guy! Me: tomorrow Him: oh! Congratulations Me: Thank you Him: Me: what are you doing? Him: nothing, you? Me: sitting in my hotel room Him: Not smart Me: What? Him: you know what! Me: So! Him: Not going to happen Me: what’s not going to happen? Him: You know! Me: My last night as a single man Him: NO! Me: Ok, I just wanted to say a proper goodbye Him: that’s all? Me: Yeah Him: not going to happen Me: Please? One final goodbye after all these years Him: Me: after 11pm – The Cambridge – room 713 – knock once Him: Me: Him: ok I was so excited; I was getting hard just thinking about it. I knew this was the dumbest idea I’ve ever had, but I wanted it so bad, I wanted to feel him cum in me one more time. I went and showered and had a hard time not jerking off I was so excited. I went and laid in the bed with towel wrapped around me waiting. 11:10pm a knock at the door, I jumped up and opened the door and there he was I immediately pulled him in the room and dropped the towel and kissed him, we worked our way to the bed pulling his clothes off along the way. I couldn’t wait! I pushed him down on the bed and finished pulling his pants off and straddled him, feeling his bare cock rub between my cheeks, I grab some lube but he stopped me and reached over and grabbed a condom and started to put it on. Me: what are you doing, you don’t need that Him: yeah, you’re married now, you have to start playing safe Me: but we never use condoms, I want you to cum in me Him: I want to too, but if we are going to do this we have to use a condom I quit arguing, I was just ready to have him inside me. I wouldn’t say that I was a power-bottom, but I definitely bounced up and down on his cock until I was completely out of breath and then I slowed down and started grinding his cock, using a condom it seemed to take him longer to cum. Afterwards we both collapsed trying to get our breath. Me: Man, I missed that! Him: me too! Me: whats up with the condom Him: you need to be smart now Me: no, I want you to cum inside of Him: I cant do that anymore Me: we have been fucking raw the entire time and nothing has happened Him: well it could now Me: what do you mean: Him: Me: what is it? Him: You remember the last time we hung out? Me: yeah Him: Remember how I told you that guy had HIV Me: kind of, it’s really foggy Him: well, he did and now I do Me: Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. That’s my fault. Him: no, it’s not your fault, I did it. Me: I don’t remember anything from the room Him: you passed out immediately and then me and him had sex, I think he stealthed me. He said the condom came off, but I’m pretty sure he took it off during sex. Me: I am so sorry Him: its ok, but I have a very high count now, since I was just infected so we can’t have unprotected sex, because I am very contagious and you’re getting married, TOMORROW Me: I don’t know what to say Him: well, there isn’t anything to say, but I should probably get going since you’re getting married tomorrow Me: yeah, I guess so, unless you want to have a beer first We sat down and had a few beers and he got up and said that he better get going. He hugged me goodbye but I lingered and leaned back and kissed him. Me: Stay a bit longer? Him: ok I kissed him again and we started working towards the bed. I fell on my back and fell on top of me, between my legs. I wanted him so bad. I reached down and pulled his cock out of his pants, and he took his pants off immediately and I slid my shorts off all the while looking each other in the eyes the entire time, he quickly put a condom on and lubed up and laid back on top of me. I quickly pulled my legs up so he could slide in. It was the best feeling in the world. With him on top me, slowly taking deep strokes while we looked each other directly in the eyes, damn it I wanted this. My left hand slipped down between us and I wrapped my thumb and index finger around the base of his cock and every time he pulled out it caused his condom to slip down a little, the further he pulled out the more the condom slipped off. I tried to somehow cause him to pull all the way out so the condom would slip completely off, but he wouldn’t, well not for a while. Me: fuck me, I really want you Him: are you sure? Me: (looking directly in his eyes, I bite my lower lip and shake my head yes) He pulled his cock all the way out and my grip around his cock caused the condom to slide off, I then grabbed his cock and aimed it directly towards my hole. I knew the danger, but I phened for it, for him, for him to cum inside of me. He was hesitant, but you could tell this is what he really wanted to. Why wouldn’t he, it was obvious he was in love with me, why wouldn’t he want to infect me like him. Holy shit it was the best feeling I’d ever felt. His bare cock sliding inside of me, I never imagined the risk the danger adding so much to the feeling. The unprotected sex obviously was a huge turn on for him too, because it didn’t take him long before he was about to cum: Him: Oh fuck, I am about to go Me: Oh fuck, oh fuck. Don’t stop baby Him: here it cums Right as he started to cum, he pulled out and shot his load all over my stomach. It was so intoxicating. I had never had a rush like that before. Like playing with a loaded gun. That feeling was the greatest feeling ever! I just now get to experience the greatest sex of my life and I can’t ever do it again? I was lost, I didn’t know what to do. That’s all I could think as we laid there. Him: I’m sorry I couldn’t do that to you. Not tonight, not the night before you get married. Me: I understand Him: if you decide not to get married, we can take that step, but you need to make that decision I knew right there and there that this wasn’t over. If I got married or not, I would def play this game again. I had to have another poz cock inside of me bare. Him, the predator, someone else, anyone else, I was addicted.

Part 2: Have you ever heard the tale of the Two Wolves? We all have two wolves inside us, trying to control differently and the wolf that you feed is the wolf that wins. I sat there with my hands on the keyboard, torn. My mind vs this carnal desire. Everything I had ever wanted vs a physical, emotional desire that would take everything I had ever wanted away from me. I tried so hard to remove my hands from the keyboard, but I felt powerless to do so. I saw the warning signs, I knew that this was not just sexual, it was so much more, so much more dangerous. I must have sat there for what seemed like an hour letting my two wolves battle, with neither wolf seeming to gain an edge, but then something happened that pulled the dark wolf ahead, he messaged me. Dan: Hey, you’re online Me: (fingers on the keyboard shaking with nervous excitement) Me: Yeah, I just had a couple minutes free and wanted to say hi Dan: It’s been a long time, I wish you had more than a couple of minutes Me: yeah, I just came home early, and my wife will be here soon Dan: Well, I’m glad you did Me: me too Dan: glad you still think about me Me: I do Dan: I still think about you too, a lot Me: Dan: I think about that night in your car and how I should have taken you by the hand and led you inside my apartment Me: you think I would have followed? Dan: I think you would have been nervous, but I think you wanted me to take you inside Me: maybe so, I was incredibly scared though Dan: you really were! You were shaking when I touched you Me: lol Dan: but I think you would have relaxed once we got inside, and we were alone Me: maybe, but I was scared half to death Dan: I would have been gentle with you Me: I believe that Dan: who knows what that would have started. I think if we had made love that night, it would have changed a lot Me: how so? Dan: We would have been closer, more connected, and you would want it more than you can imagine so you would have come back Me: I can see that being true Then during the chat something happened that I didn’t expect: Dan: (Dan is requesting to video chat) Me: ignores it Dan: please Me: I don’t know Dan: don’t turn your camera on, I just want you to see Dan: (Dan is requesting to video chat) Me: (accepts) I have my video off, but he can hear me. I see him lying in bed, its dark the bed is a mess as he is laying there on the sheets with no shirt. Dan: Are you there? Me: (nervously) yes Dan: it is so good to hear your voice, I wanted you to hear mine and see me, all of me He points the camera down to his rock hard cock and starts slowly stroking it Dan: Do you like it? Me: (my voice cracks) yes Dan: it likes you Dan: it wants you and only you I find it almost hard to breath now Dan: Do you want it? Please PLEASE tell me you do Me: I do! Dan: Good baby, I knew that you did Dan starts stroking a little faster and moaning. My cock is rock hard and I pull it out and start to stroke it with him, trying not to cum, but being so turned on. Dan: FUCK! It feels so good to be inside you. Finally, we are together Dan: Tell me you want me raw Me: I want you! Dan: Tell me you want my bare cock inside you Me: I want you inside me Dan: come on baby, please take me bare. I need it, I need you Me: I want you to fuck me raw Dan: Fuck yes babe! I slide my huge bare cock inside you, you feel so much better than I had ever dreamed. I whisper in your ear that we are together now. Tell me you want it! Me: I want it babe! I do! Dan: I start fucking your faster and deeper, I hear you moan with pleasure as I get deeper and deeper. I tell you that we are going to be together forever now, there is no going back now, it’s just you and me baby. I know you want it. I am so close to cumming right now, and I am so caught up in the story I would do whatever he wanted, I have fully lost control! Me: I do want it babe: Dan: tell me you want me to cum inside you! Tell me you want cum flowing through your veins! Tell me that you belong to me now! Tell me that I am yours and you are mine! You’re going to leave your wife behind to be with me. Please baby! Fuck please! Me: Cum inside of me baby! Cum deep inside of me, I am yours! Dan: Fuck, I can’t hold it back anymore! I am going to cum! I push as deep as I possibly can inside of you trying to ensure my cum is injected directly into your veins. And I lean over and whisper in your ear, my poz cum is my wedding vow to you, there is no going back for either of us as my cock starts pouring a river of poz cum inside of you. Me: I want it! I see dan on camera shooting out a huge load all over his bed and I do the same, cuming all over my office chair. I sat there for a minute trying to regain my composure. That is the most intense sex Ive ever had and it wasn’t real. But now I am starting to come down from my high and reality is sinking in. What the fuck have I done! If I thought I had created a dangerous situation before, what I have I done now! Dan: Oh my gosh! You’re the best fuck I’ve ever had! And I am SO happy that you feel the same way about me! Me: Dan: Babe, I promise you that I am going to treat you so good. I am going to make you happy, trust me. Me: Dan: We need to make this happen soon! I know you’re ready too! Me: Dan: you still cleaning up after that great fuck? Lol Me: Me: Gotta run, wife just walked inside!!! Sorry Dan: What? Tell her about us, its time! We are together now! Dan: She needs to know about us so we can start with our life. I logged off without responding to the last two messages. I sat there thinking to myself, what have I done. I have no control over myself and I’m going to throw my life away. I just told him I wanted to divorce my wife and marry him. I cannot be trusted. The next day I thought to myself, ever since 9th grade, I have worked towards 1 goal, become a lawyer, have a successful practice, have the hot trophy wife that everyone wants, have a membership at the country club, take vacations to Aspen, the Bahamas, nice places. And I have all of that right now, but I am trying my best to throw all of it away. And don’t be mistaken, it will ALL be taken from you. If your wife finds out, you will get a divorce and her father will drag you through court so long that you won’t be able to take on other cases, not that any other cases will come to you. Your father-in-law will be sure to spread it to the far corners of the earth that you cheated on your wife with a homeless HIV drug addict, whatever he can say to ruin my reputation and he is well enough connected to do so. If you cannot control your desires to have a guy fuck you, you can easily find another guy. A guy who isn’t infected with every std possible, a guy who isn’t trying to own you and keep you locked in a cage. There must be some guy out there like me, that wants something secret. If the urges ever get that bad, that is what I will do, Dan is no longer an option. For almost a year and half, I hardly thought of dan. I forced myself to believe that it wasn’t an option, and if the urge ever occurred, I just told myself, well you need to try something different, dan isn’t an option anymore. Most of the time, I would just go and jerk off and occasionally I would watch a little porn and then JO, but that seemed to work, it satisfied the craving. Over the next year and half, my business grew, I had 2 other attorneys working for me and not to mention a very sexy assistant. And my relationship with my wife got better, I honestly believe this happened when I hired my assistant. She got a little jealous and more interested in me. Things were going good. Right around the year and half mark, I got a pretty big case, back in my college town, back where dan was, and I had to go back there for the first time since I graduated, over 12 years ago. Our first in court appointment on the case was on Thursday morning at 9am. Now, I live two and half hours from there, so leaving at 6:30am isn’t that difficult, but I thought it would be best to drive up the day before and get a hotel room, just so I’m prepared you know. My wife actually offered to come and stay with me, but I told her that I wanted to go over the case material in the hotel room, so she decided to stay back. The nostalgia of being back in your college town, what can i say, it felt great. Something inside you makes you feel young again, young wild and free! But none of that was true, it just felt that way. First thing I did was I went to the gym, then I came back to the hotel and ate dinner at the hotel bar. I sat there for almost 2 hours having drinks, flirting with the bar tender. She was younger, in college, tattooed up and just looked sexy as hell. I have to admit, I was very tempted to invite her up, this is probably the first sign that I’m letting college nostalgia effect my head. But, you can never tell with bar tenders, is she flirting with me because she wants a tip or something more, and there was no way I was going to stay down there another 3 hours until they closed. So I left her a $100 tip, (yes, I was definitely trying to show off) and told her it was fun talking with her and left. I got up to the room and took a shower and then with just a towel wrapped around me sat on the bed and turned on the tv and grabbed my notes, time to go over the case material. But, I was buzzing pretty hard from the drinks and found it hard to concentrate. So I thought I would jerk off really quick and the first thing that popped in my mind wasn’t the sexy bar tender, it was Dan. I told myself that Dan wasn’t an option, but I’m not going to talk to him, I’m just going to Jerk off thinking about him, the guard then came down. That is where it all changed course. It put dan back on the table, it no longer was “Not an option”. I allowed myself to think about him, about our last conversation, and right now my mind wasn’t focused on the part about me losing everything I had ever worked for, it was focused in on the part with his extremely long cock. I was already getting hard, but there was something inside me that wanted more, like just going to jerk off was drinking a diet soda, I didn’t want diet soda, it wasn't going to satisfy this craving, I wanted more. I almost immediately had my laptop open on the site ready to log in and then there was this subtle howl, the other wolf was trying so hard to change my mind but I didn’t even take the time to think it over. I pressed the “login” button. Immediately I see that I had almost 35 messages from Dan since the last time we spoke, this did bring me back down a notch and alarms started going off Dan: Last night was so fun! Love you (a few days later) Dan: I can’t wait to see you baby! Love you so much! (the next day) Dan: Just thinking about last night, I am so happy that we feel the same. Love you (a week later) Dan: Hurry back on here, I miss you! (another week later) Dan: ok, this is starting to make me mad. I need to talk to you (The next day) Dan: Look, you and I both know how you really feel. You want this more than I do, quit being an ass. (a few weeks later) Dan: I guess you decided to stay with your whore wife. Who cares about me huh? What about you? You know that you want me, you crave me, I am the only one who can make you happy! (the next day) Dan: ok, I guess I will have to call your wife and tell her about us. I guess you’re not big enough of a man to do it, so you need me to come do it for you. (a month later) Dan: You should see the guy I fucked last night, he reminded me so much of you in college. He took a huge load! (a month later) Dan: What are you going to do when I come to your office and just walk into your office and bend you over your desk and fuck you raw as everyone hears you begging me to cum inside you! (several months later) Dan: omg! I can’t believe I sent that message; I was so drunk and was out with this really hot college guy that I’m dating now and I didn’t even remember sending that. Sorry, hope you’re ok. (6 months later) Dan: Hey! Just wanted to say hi, haven’t talked to my husband (lol) in a while so thought I would say hi. Hi hubby. Lol remember that night haha (1 month later) Dan: sends video message of him jerking off and as he is cumming he says “Oh fuck, I can’t wait until I get to cum inside you again babe” (the next day) Dan: sorry I meant to send that to someone else. Hope you’re ok (a few months later) Dan: Funny story, I was talking about you last night with my boyfriend and he totally wants to meet you! (a few days before now) Dan: Hey just think about you, wanted to catch up and say hi and see how things are going. I read them all several times, thinking it all over carefully. This guy is not stable, he is dangerous. He would do anything possible to infect you, rape, stealth you, anything. He sincerely believes that by doing this, we will essentially be married because where else can I go? I can’t go back to my wife, and who would start dating me when I have HIV+, Hepatis, and Herpes, whatever std he has. I would have nowhere to go, so I guess I would just marry him, and he would move in with me and I would buy him a car and we would take vacations all over and he wouldn’t have to do anything. So, he will do anything possible to get his toxic load inside you. That brought me down, but I still wanted to Jerk off thinking about him, so I pulled up that video he sent me and watched him stroking his long cock and shooting his load and hearing him say he was cumming inside me. I watched it over and over with my hand on my cock, but I couldn’t bring myself to jerk off, I didn’t want to cum. I wanted more! Me: Hey man, things are good, how are you? I see you have a boyfriend now, I am happy for you. Within 5 minutes: Dan: Just working, great to hear from you. Me. Work, work work, lol all work no play Dan: lol, you never let me play! Me: you have a boyfriend to play with (not believing he has a boyfriend) Dan: he doesn’t have to know Me: Dan, you don’t want to cheat Dan: You don’t tell him, I won’t tell your wife, I little secret Me: lol, secrets can be dangerous Dan: I like that Me: I know you do! Dan: so do you! Me: I do? Dan: What are you doing online? Me: Sitting in a hotel supposed to be working but doing something else Dan: I wish I was something else 😉 Me: lol, I didn’t say letting something else do me Dan: You should say that Me: really? Dan: Yes Me: Your boyfriend is going to be mad at you Dan: He knows about you, about us Me: what does he know Dan: he knows everything Dan: why are you in a hotel working? Wife kick you out? Me: lol, no. I’m here in town for work. Dan: You’re in town right now? Me: for tonight, I have a court early tomorrow Dan: Where are you staying? Me: The Montgomery Dan: Of course, the nicest hotel around Me: Lol, business expense Dan: what are you going to do when I come over Me: how are you going to get here? Dan: call a cab Me: you don’t know what room number I’m in though Dan: are you really there Me: (sends picture out of window) Dan: You can’t tease me, let me come over! Me: I can’t I have to study, you have a boyfriend, I have a wife Dan: We broke up last week Me: oh, I’m sorry (still not believing he ever had a boyfriend) Dan: Please! We don’t have to have sex, I just want to hang out Me: Really? You think you could come over, be alone in a bedroom and just talk? Dan: Yeah, I mean hopefully you will give me a hug and maybe a kiss, but we don’t have to have sex unless you want to. Me: I really need to study for this case Dan: I’m taking $20 out of the register now to get a cab, that’s enough to get me there, someone else will have to bring me back 😉 Me: you cant steal from your work you will lose your job Dan: I will pay them back somehow, you can loan me $20, right? Me: and now you’re talking about staying the night, you just said we wouldn’t have sex Dan: Just called the cab Me: you still don’t know my room number Dan: That means I have 10 minutes to get it from you before I get there. Me: Dan, hold on a minute! Dan: Already called the cab Me: Really hold on, lets think about this Dan: too late, what is your room number Me: Dan: I guess I could ask the front desk Me: Dan, come on. Lets talk this through Dan: we have been talking for years! If you don’t want to have sex, we won’t. Me: Dan: Getting in the cab Me: 5 minutes later Dan: (sends photo of the hotel) Me: what the hell! Dan: Should I ask the bar tender or the front desk for your room number? Me: hold on one second Dan: They’re really going to be “why is he going up to his room” Me: Dan, seriously hold on one second. Dan: Front desk it is Me: Ok! Dan: Ok what? Me: NO sex, right? Dan: up to you! Me: 412 I am pacing through the room, not knowing what to do before I realize I am still just wearing a towel. There is a knock at the door, “hold on one second”. I turn off the lights except the tv and the lights coming in the window and grab some shorts tee shirt and throw them on really quick and go to the door. I slowly open the door and see dan, much older and skinnier than I remember, but it has been over 10 years, and he isn’t the healthiest person I know, so he hasn’t exactly aged well. He walks in and the door shuts, he hugs me and kisses me, and I pull back a little. Dan: I’ve missed you so much! Me: I missed you too, but I cant…. Dan: I know, but you would have just talked all night Me: did you really steal from your work Dan: yeah, I had to, what else could I do. I had to see you Me: Dan: give me a hug! Dan steps in gives me a hug, as his arms wrap around me, he pulls himself in close and lingers, as he slightly pulls back and say’s I’ve missed you so much and leans in and kisses me. He sits down on the bed and taps beside him, come sit down! I hesitate and he grabs my hand and pulls me to him. He is sitting on the edge of the bed, and he pulls me to where I am standing directly in front of him, he then puts his hands behind me, on my butt and pulls me in and hugs me, with his face right next to my dick. He slowly turns his face to where his face is directly on my cock with nothing but a thin pair of shorts between us as he takes in a deep breath. He then lays back on the bed holding onto my hands pulling me on top of him, he puts both of his hands behind my knees pulling my legs to his side, so I am straddling him. Dan: this feels so good Me: I thought we were just going to be friends tonight Dan pulls himself up close to me and puts his right arm around me and twists to the left rolling over on top of me between my legs. Dan: you said we could hug and kiss As he leans over and starts to kiss me, shoving his tongue down my throat, for a second I kiss him back but then reality awakens me as I push him back. He pulls back and smiles. He then leans down and kisses me more forceful this time, again I kiss him for a second, but then stop, but he doesn’t. He starts kissing my neck and with his right hand he moves it below my left knee, pulling my knee up as he starts grinding on me. I feel his cock getting harder and pushing through his pants and pressing up against me. Completely out of my control, my cock starts getting hard, but I still try and stop him. Me: hold on dan Me: Dan! Hold on a second Dan just moans and keeps kissing me and grinding more forcibly. Me: Dan STOP! Dan gets up and with both hands pulls my shorts off, I try to stop but it happens so fast I didn’t even see it coming, he unbuttons his pants right in front of me as I am laying there on the bed. Me: Dan we need to stop now Dan: it’s ok, I promise, I will keep my underwear on, I just want to blow you like I did before. Me: Please, we need to stop Dan pulls his pants down and is standing there in his dirty white underwear, he drops to his knees and takes my cock in his mouth. I gasp for air, it feels so good, I am convincing myself that I will let him blow me and that’s all. It feels so good, my hips start to move. That movement you feel when you know the other person really wants it, I couldn’t control it. Then I feel his finger pushing inside of me, he must have had lube in his pocket, but he is pouring lube inside of me pushing more and more into me with his fingers, he goes from one finger to two to 3. I actually start to moan, then I feel him mouth leave my cock and go to my stomach, my chest my neck, my mouth and I kiss him back. Then I feel him pushing his bare cock towards me, I turn my head and say “NO!” Me: we can’t do that, ok? Dan: its ok baby, its ok As he keeps pushing it towards my lubed-up hole but I am blocking him. Then dan puts his hands around both of my wrists and holds them down as he continues to try and push his cock in me. Me: Dan, stop! We can’t to this. Not like this, we have to use a condom stop! Dan: its ok babe, I know you want this Dan removes his right hand from my wrist and puts it behind my knee pulling my knee up towards me giving him better access, with my free hand I try to stop him so he takes his left hand and puts it on my throat, with one hand holding my knee up and the other directly on my throat, leaving all of his wait pushing down on my throat, it’s hard to speak or even breath. Then I feel it, his bare cock is pushing in me, with one more push, his hard bare cock is about 1/3 of the way in me. He then removes his hands from my leg and throat and collapses on me and starts to kiss me. Dan: You feel so fucking good! I knew you wanted this As he starts taking slow strokes getting deeper and deeper. as he continues to speak under his breath with every stroke Dan: It's ok babe Dan: You know you want it, i know you really want this His breathing is getting heavier and heavier Dan: You know you fucking want this I am lying there in shock at what is happening, but at the same time this is the first time I have ever had anything inside of me, ever! So, I am also feeling this feeling. Dan keeps going harder and harder and getting deeper and deeper until he finally gets his entire bare cock buried inside of me, he then looks me right in the eye and kisses me and says Dan: you feel so good! I am already about to cum Me: dan, don’t cum inside of me please. I’m not ready Dan: It’s ok baby! I love you, I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t love you. This is the only way As he starts fucking me again, I try to push him back, but he just grabs my wrists again holding me down and fucks me even harder until he takes one last thrust that makes me grunt, and then I feel his cock exploding inside of me. Dan: fuck! i'm cumming baby, i'm cumming I just lay there feeling his huge cock pumping over and over again pouring his poz load inside of me. He collapses on top me and I hear him say “I love you baby” as he rolls off to the side and lays there trying to catch his breath. I am just lying there, and what is kind of funny is that I’m not thinking about his poz load inside of me. I just keep thinking “was I just raped”. I honestly don’t know. I feel like I was saying no, and tried to stop him, but at the same time he was saying stuff like “I love you and I miss you”. And, I was rock hard and my clock exploded too. Do you cum if you’re actually getting raped? I honestly didn't know if this was actual rape. I laid there thinking that for about 20 minutes before it dawns on me that his toxic load is still inside of me. I get out bed without waking him up and go sit on the toilet for 30 minutes hoping it will just all come out of me. This is when I realize what has just happened. There is no going back now, everything he wanted he may have just got, everything I have ever wanted I may have just lost. I went and laid back down, trying to sleep, but that wasn’t possible. A couple hours later he woke up and went to the bathroom, I tried to pretend like I was sleeping, but I hear him walk out of the bathroom and comes lays back in bed beside me. He lays right next to me, and I continue to pretend to be sleeping, as he starts kissing my neck and then he starts rubbing my cock again. I just lay there as he continues on, but soon my cock starts to get hard, and I hear him say “there you are” I kind of moan from pleasure and move my hips as he starts to kiss me, shoving his tongue down my throat. It feels so good, I kiss him back and he climbs on top of me, between my legs, I feel his cock getting hard and rubbing against me and he is grinding his rock hard cock up against me. Dan: I fucking want you Me: Mhmmm Dan: do you want me Me: (I open my eyes, no longer pretending to be asleep and look him in the eyes. Here I am in my thirties, in my prime, with a $100k car in the parking lot, and here he is, old, sickly, doesn’t even have $20 dollars to his name, and he wants to own me, he wants me to give him everything I have and how do I respond, I bite my lower lip, looking him in the eyes and shake my head yes, yes I want you. You can have me, you can have everything!) Dan: (smiles) tell me Me: I want you Dan: No, I need to hear it all. Do you want me to fuck you raw, do you want us to be one Me: yes, I want you to fuck me raw Dan: you want me to cum inside of you, my toxic poz load inside of you Dan: you can’t go back to your old life now, you will be mine. Is that what you want? Me: yes, I want you so badly Dan: (Grins so big) Dan: If you want us to be married, grab my bare cock and slide it in you I do as i'm told, looking him in the eyes the entire time, I reach down between his legs and grab his bare cock and aim it towards my hole. As I am doing this dan looks me in the eyes and says: Dan: be careful here, if you do this, I am going to poz you. You can’t go back to your wife, if you try to run, I will find you and ruin you. If you put my cock inside you, we are together forever and if you even think about leaving me, I will ruin you! Im laying there with his huge bare cock in my hand aiming it directly towards my hole and I hear him say all this and I realize that he isn’t going to force himself on me this time, its my decision and it's totally up to me. If I do it, I have to leave my wife and essentially be married to him, or he is going to ruin me. He is giving me an out. He is letting me stop and say goodbye to him. He always thought if he got the chance to fuck me, that I would be the one to give it all up for him, and now he is giving me the option to stop it and let him go or to choose a life with him. It is all running through my mind, what do I do? I know what i have to do, i look him right in the eye: Me: I do! Me: Your load has the power to make us one. I don't want you to use a condom, I don't want you to pull out. If you infect me now, I will be yours forever. Dan smiled really big - everything he had wanted for 12 years was about to be his Dan: This is our wedding, you're mine now He then stuck his finger in my ass and started fingering me without lube and doing it very rough, I could feel his fingernails scratching my inside. I clenched up and grunted from the pain, but he didn’t stop, he just went harder and harder. When he finally finished, he pulled out his finger which was covered in blood. Dan: there is no chance you won’t get infected now, you ready? I reached down and grabbed his cock and aimed it towards my hole. I was his.

What do you do when you recognize the red flags, but something in you chooses to ignore them? I guess that is what sets each of us on our own individual path. I don’t have to say, “Looking back I see the red flags” no, I clearly saw the red flags at the time, but choose to keep going despite the severe warning and that is how I got to where I am today. I guess I should start this story in college. I absolutely loved college, I was smart, so good grades came easy, I had lots of good friends, and we partied way too much, I was an attractive guy, so I found it easy to get girls and I took full advantage. I would say that I slept with several of the most attractive girls on campus. I was always careful, well most of the time I was very careful, because despite all the partying and sleeping around, I knew exactly what I wanted out of life and I didn’t want an unexpected pregnancy or std to interfere with that. Since high school I knew I was going to be a lawyer with a trophy wife, making bank and living the good life. I had no doubts that was my life’s direction, and it didn’t matter how much fun college was, that was my top priority, so I wasn’t going to do anything to risk that. I made good grades, I read books, I exercised daily, ate well, used condoms, and stayed healthy. Now, as careful as I was, there was one thing I wanted to try that did risk everything. I really wanted a blow job from a guy, but there was no way I would risk getting caught, so there was no way I would ever act on it. I guess you could say I was a little bi-curious. It wasn’t a dominating thought or anything, I have no doubt that I was way more attracted to girls, and loved having sex with girls, but I did want to see what this experience would be like. Occasionally, if I had a boring weekend I would get on my fake email and get on craigslist and chat with other guys who were looking for a “secret hookup buddy”, but I was always worried it could be someone that I might recognize or run into while I was out with friends, so it never went further than that. Well almost never. My senior year, I had one of those boring weekends where I got on Craigslist and posted “college hunk looking to chat”. As you all know, you get a ton of spam, but there were a few serious ones, but most wanted to chat for 10 minutes and then meet, which I wasn’t ready for. But there was one guy, Dan, who was totally happy with chatting and nothing more. Obviously, he was bored and didn’t have many friends, so he was happy for someone to talk with. I explained to him a little about myself, even though I changed up some key aspects to try and throw him off my trail if he did try to investigate. He told me he was in his late 40’s (no chance of us running in the same crowds), worked at a gas station at night, as he told me it’s the gas station right by The DipStick, the only gay bar in town. I laughed and told him that has to be convenient and he said that it was and that occasionally some drunk guys leaving the place would stop in for beer or cigarettes and he might get to blow them or something in the bathroom. We chatted for a few hours and when I was about to leave the chat he said “I know you’re not ready, but if you ever want a really good blow job I live over at the Lake View apartments on MLK blvd. You could stop by real quick and get off and if you wanted you could touch my cock if you’ve never got that opportunity before”. I told him that I appreciated the offer, but wasn’t ready. I logged off and went to search his apartment, which was directly behind the gas station he worked at, and it was really run down and looked sketchy and dangerous, like you’re going to get mugged or shot. Over the next few months leading up to winter break we chatted quite a bit and I grew to really enjoy talking with me. Of course the conversations grew more sexual, with him talking about how much he wanted to see me naked and suck my cock, and I was definitely turned on by the thought of it and I would reply somewhat vague, like “Oh yeah”, I was still super nervous, like all of a sudden he would respond “this was all a joke, this is your friend and we are punking you, you fag!”. I know how stupid that sounds, but my mind was crazy. The more and more we talked the more comfortable I became with him, I ended up sending him a body/dick pic, which he almost melted over. Not trying to brag, this statement is more about the lack of attention this guy would get rather than how hot I was, but I was pretty damn hot. He responded with a pic of him jerking off, and he had a really big dick, long and slim, just like the full body and face pic he sent next. He was an older guy, looked like he had a rough life. Tall and skinny. Behind him I could see his bed mattress on the floor with a box tv on a milk crate in a room that was absolutely trashed with clothes and trash on the floor, definitely a guy who doesn't have much company. Despite all that mess and sketchy apartment, I was turned on, mainly because it felt safe. There was no way I was going to run into this guy anywhere I went. We were definitely not running in the same circles, but he was lonely and bored and had plenty of time to try and investigate who I was and find my real identity, so I still kept my guard up. Finals week right before winter break, I was one of the few people on campus that got stuck with a Friday Final, so by Thursday almost everyone was gone. The campus was a ghost town, but that is ok, because I needed to study for my final. Thursday night I was studying, until I got too bored and decided to jump online and see if Dan was online and wanted to chat. I got online and sent him a message “Enjoying the snow?”, within 2 minutes he was online and replied · Dan: Bundled up in bed naked staying warm, you? · Me: Trying to study, but bored and now thinking about being naked in bed · Dan: Naked In bed is a lot more fun when someone is with you · Me: I bet your right, its too bad you don’t have someone there with you to help keep you warm · Dan: I know, I wish someone would cum over, I would definitely show them how much I appreciated the cumpany · Me: You mean you can’t find anyone on craigslist to cum over on a night like this? I would think it would be easy to get a one-night-stand · Dan: Yeah, if I looked like you! · Me: Well, I think you look like a great one night stand · Dan: Be careful what you say · Me: Why is that? · Dan: if you ever do come over for a bj I might try more · Me: more? · Dan: Make you fall in love with me · Me: Lol, how so? · Dan: I will get you on my bed and you will be asking for a bj and I will start blowing you and then I will stop and pull your pants all the way off and start kissing you up your stomach to your mouth and you would be surprised as I kiss you, but even more surprised to feel my giant cock pressing up against you as I tell you how much I want you, you reply “I only want to be with you” as I slide my giant cock inside you and make love to you until we cum together · Me: fuck man, that got me hard! · Dan: cum over, please! · Me: I’m driving around now going to get something · Dan: cum over here now! Take a left off MLK to 13th, the second building facing the road, second floor, apartment 2B, door is open and its cold outside please come shut my door · Me: · Dan: you there · Me: I’m parked outside · Dan: cum up baby, I want you · Me: · Dan: please baby! · Me: · Dan: I see you sitting in your truck, want me to come down · Me: · Dan: I’m coming down I see him walk out his apartment door, down the stairs and I’m panicking. My heart is beating out of my chest, not sure what to do, but I can’t move. He knocks on the passenger window and opens the door and sits in the truck. He tries to talk me into to coming up stairs, but I can’t move. I am so scared that I just sit there giving him one-word answers. We sit like this for 5 or so minutes until he reaches over and starts rubbing my leg. I am so nervous my body is shaking as his hand goes to my cock that is rock hard. As he feels my cock, he smiles at me and starts to pull it out from my sweatpants. He starts rubbing my cock saying how much my cock wants him, and how much I want to be with him, as he is leaning over to my cock he says “don’t worry, I want us to be together too” and he takes my cock in his mouth. It felt so fucking good, I had never felt anything like it before. Everything around us was quite, no-one around, dark and super cold with snow falling as this old man is sucking me off in my truck and I’ve never been more turned on. It didn’t take long for me to cum and he swallowed it all up. He sat up licking his lips to see my face completely in shock at what just happened, he then leaned over and kissed me. The high was wearing off and I began to come back to reality and what had just happened and what had almost happened if I had went in the apartment. He noticed the change in my demeanor and made a quick exit, but before he left he said “see how easy it is, you’re not going to jail, you didn’t get caught by anyone, you don’t have to stay for dinner after. Any time you want to, you know where I live” and he left and I drove home. For weeks after, I will still in shock, promising to myself that it would never happen again, but that only lasted for a little while before I got curious. I really wanted to see what messages he had sent me since our encounter, so I logged on to see, and there were several messages about how good that was and would have been better if I had come inside the apartment and how much he missed me and thought we could start something amazing. Despite all this, how good it was, how often we chatted, my final semester at college, we only chatted. I never went back over there. After graduation, I was going to law school about 1.5 hours away, so after the semester had ended my dad and younger brothers came to help me pack and move me to my new apartment in a new city. They packed up all my clothes except the clothes on my back and were about to leave when I decided I wanted to stay one more night and head home in the morning. My dad responded, "but you don’t have a bed or anything here", it's ok, I will sleep on the floor or over at a friends. Its my last night here, probably ever, I want to go out with friends and have a few drinks, they agreed and left, but I had no intentions of going out, well not with friends. I went to the gym and got something to eat and some beer and came home and showered and got clean and shaved up and around 10pm, decided to jump on chat and see what Dan was up to: · Me: well this is it. I am heading out. I can say I am honestly going to miss you and our talks · Dan: Come say goodbye · Me: lol, I cant, I am with my family · Dan: Damn, I wish you had come over last night so I could say good bye to you · Me: me too! · Dan: I am going to miss you two! · Me: us two? · Dan: you and your little friend, to bad he never got to meet my friend, they would have liked each other · Dan: sends a picture of him holding his cock · Me: wow! I swear your cock is a foot long · Dan: lol, no. I wish it was wider · Me: is that better · Dan: most people want it thicker rather than longer · Me: Oh, it looks good to me · Dan: I really liked yours and really wanted to see it again · Me: would you suck it as good as you did last time? · Dan: better! · Me: How so? · Dan: we would be naked in bed together and I would make you never want to leave me · Me: Don’t go falling in love, I am leaving tomorrow · Dan: tomorrow? · Me: maybe · Dan: don’t go falling in love · Me: lol touché · Dan: Cum over and let’s make love · Me: Make love? getting serious here Dan? · Dan: Maybe, by the end you won’t want to leave, I may get you pregnant so you have to stay · Me: that might be hard, not sure I can get pregnant · Dan: lol, that means we are going to make love bareback and I’m going to cum deep inside you, so we are together forever · Me: Oh lol! But I always use a condom, no offense. · Dan: you won’t want to tonight, it feels SOOO good to have someone cum deep inside you · Me: really? · Dan: yes! You will love it. · Me: I don't know if you're clean or have something. Are you clean? · Dan: I think so, I am trusting that you’re clean. · Me: lol, you didn’t even ask me if i was! · Dan: I guess I honestly don’t care, I just want us to be together, even if you do have something. How about this, I will put it in you and if you don’t like the way it feels I will pull out and put on a condom? · Me: I can’t believe I am saying this, but I think okay · Dan: you think? · Me: I’m having a few drinks trying to build up the courage to come over. · Dan: Come over baby, please. We can make slow sweet love, and if you decide to move, we will have this one night and we will both know that my cum will always be inside you · Me: Ok! · Dan: YES! I fucking love you · Me: hold on, someone is knocking on my door I got to the door and 3 of my friends where there and just came inside saying let’s go out and get wasted. I didn’t return to my messages that night and completely left him hanging. The next day I left and moved off, started law school, met a girl, and started a new life, completely leaving dan behind. As I started my new life and had a clear vision of my future, I was thankful that that night ended up the way it did, but I did feel terrible about just leaving him without even saying goodbye. It was almost 2 years after that night that I was home alone and bored and decided to log in and see what he had said after me ditching him. I was very nervous because I knew he would be furious, but to my surprise his messages weren’t hateful or angry at all. For the next few months following that night, he apologized for trying to rush me, he asked if I was ok, he expressed concern that maybe something had happened to me and he would never know, he messaged me about missing me, but nothing hateful. I sent him a message trying to explain what had happened that night and what had happened since then, and how I hoped he could forgive me for just disappearing. Within a few minutes he was online and was very nice. He was glad to see that I was ok and wasn't dead, and said that he understood. We chatted for a little while about life, nothing sexual, just catching up. Over the next TEN YEARS we continued to chat, not on a regular basis, but once or twice every 6 months and some instances going over a year without talking. Most of our talking was about life, just how things are going. I told him about me getting married and working for my wife’s dad’s law firm and basically living the life I had always dreamed. I wasn’t trying to brag, but when you’re talking about your life, this stuff was bound to come up. He was still living in the same apartment and was working at the same gas station; he said he was really depressed for a year or so after I disappeared. He almost seemed angry or resentful that my life was going so well and his wasn't. This wasn't the life he had dreamed of, nobody wants to be almost 60 years old working at a gas station and living pay check to pay check. I felt like he believed that if I had just come over that night, then me and him would be together and we would be living together and he would be the one driving the mercedes instead of my wife. Although I did enjoy talking with him, he did not seem like the same guy I knew, he lived a more carefree lifestyle. As if tomorrow didn't matter, living life without fear of consequences, and was almost happy to tell me about it, perhaps trying to make me jealous of his sexual escapades. Over the next 10 years, he would send me messages about guys leaving DipStick that he would hook up with in the bathroom or occasionally go back to his apartment. Inevitably, one day I got a message that he got herpes, then a couple years later he said he tested positive for Hepatitis C, this one really seemed to hit him hard, he was depressed and angry with himself. After this he seemed to be almost on a downward spiral, not caring about his actions so it wasn’t much of a surprise when I got a message one day that he tested HIV positive. This one really got him angry and depressed; I believe he hated seeing how my life turned out and how his was spiraling downwards. I believe he was honestly believing that me and him would end up together and maybe I would take him away from his life working at a gas station trying to suck off drunk strangers in the bathroom because that was the only action he could get. He never came out said that, but he would get upset if I spoke about my wife or anything positive with our life, but did seem to enjoy the problems I had working for my father-in-law and my wife always took his side. After his new found status, he went on a while sleeping with people without a condom and said he enjoyed giving them what he called his “Happy Meal” because it was a combo of Herpes, Hepatitis and HIV. He rationalized it as though the person didn’t want to wear a condom or ask him if he was poz, so he had no problem sharing it with them. In his mind, if his life was falling apart, he wanted everyone else to experience the same feeling. We would continue to chat every 6 months or so, and eventually he began to embrace his new life and didn’t look at it as if it was a curse. He said he couldn’t afford medication, so he would just live his best life and enjoy his life. He honestly seemed a lot happier, like the Dan I remembered from college, if not happier. One day I sent him a picture message of an office building. He replied what is that? I told him that it was my new office. I left my father in law’s firm after being passed up for a partnership. He never really liked me, so I quit and started out on my own. This ultimately led to some serious issues between me and my wife and caused some friction because I was making way less money and she was daddy’s little girl so I was always the bad guy. But what really caught me off guard was Dan’s response, he replied to my message of the picture with the address. I asked him how he got it and he told me that he did an image search and found it on the realtors site with the address. Thankfully I don’t think Dan had a car, so he did have immediate access to me. My biggest fear, being found out was closer than ever, and I had more to lose than ever before. Dan started to tease me about how he was going to show up one day at my office so we could pick up where we left off 10 years ago. Thankfully, nothing ever came from it, because again, I don’t think Dan had a car or transportation. One night I was home alone because my wife had gone to a fund raiser for dog charity she works with and we were still not doing very well, so she went alone. So, I got online to talk to dan. · Me: What’s up · Dan: Cuming to knock on your door · Me: (panicking) WHAT? · Dan: I know where you work now · Me: (relieved he didn’t know my home address) and what are you going to do when you get there? · Dan: Take you back to your office and give you what you’ve been dreaming of for 10 years · Me: and what is that? · Dan: Me, all of me! · Me: All of you? · Dan: yes, all of it! Nothing between us, you and me joined · Me: well too bad im not at the office · Dan: yeah! Move back here! · Me: Lol, · Dan: You wouldn’t ever want me to leave after · Me: after? · Dan: after I knock you up! You’ll fall in love After this conversation I realized, he wanted to be with me. He doesn’t just want a one-night-stand, he wants to be together and I may be treading on dangerous waters. But still, a couple of months later I find myself logged in again to talk with Dan. Why am I ignoring these red flags! But the next red flag was unmistakable, this message that he sent a couple of days after our last conversation: Dan: I know you want me, why are you lying to yourself. You know you want to be with me. We have been talking for over 10 years, and still want each other. I just wish you would give in to what YOU want. You know you’re not happy, only I can make you happy, just like only you can make me happy. We are meant to be together and if you would just meet me you would see that. Just one night together and you would see we are meant for each other. I would treat you so much better than your wife does. Does she think about you all the time, does she get your dick as hard as I do. Just come here for one day, one hour and you will see it. I know you’re nervous, but I would be so gentle. I would start by kissing you and telling you how much I love you and then I would lead you back to the bed and I would lay on top you kissing you so softly as we started taking each other’s clothes off. I would work my way down kissing your chest and stomach and then your beautiful cock. You would moan as I sucked it like I did last time, but I wouldn’t let you cum yet. I would work my way back up between your legs as you look up at me, looking in my eyes as you pull my giant rock-hard cock out of my underwear. You have been wanting this so long and here it is, right in front of you, its yours forever! I bend down and start kissing your ear as you feel my bare cock pushing up against you. I ask you if you want me, as you reply “Yes”, but I want more, I want to hear how bad you want me baby, you reply “So bad, I only want you”. I tell you to grab my bare cock and aim it towards your lubed hole. Do you want my bare cock baby, you reply “Yes I do”. Tell me how bad you want it “I want you to fuck me raw, impregnate me, give me what you have so we can be together forever. I want to be with you only you, make me yours now, plant your seed in me now baby, I love you!” as I put my cock inside your raw, you’re so happy to finally have it, I make a few small strokes and finally get all 10” inside you. I stop and whisper in your ear “ there is no going back from here, we will be together forever now” and you get so turned on you look at me and say “I want us to be one, I want your seed flowing through my veins, this is the only way we can truly be together and be one, breed me baby, make me yours, you own me”. As I cum inside you, so deep inside you. There is no going back now. I know you want this baby, please cum to me. Only I can make you this happy, deep down you know this. As I read that message, I was shocked. I am really in a dangerous position. He wants to own me, this is the type of stuff you see before someone goes missing. I am generally concerned for my life at this point. The tone of the message was not about sex or love, it was about ownership, it was desperation, it was psychotic, if I can't have you nobody can type stuff. I knew that I was in danger, he knew where my office was but thankfully had no transportation, if I were to meet him he would do everything in his power to try and trap me by giving me his “Happy meal” so I couldn’t go back to my wife. I would have to divorce her and then, in his mind be with him. And that’s if things don’t go worse and he tries to kill me. I realized that everything I had ever worked for, my career, my life was all at risk of being ripped away from me right now, but what I truly couldn’t understand is why my dick was SOOO hard reading that message. I guess the thought of being so desperately desired by someone, the danger situation, the sexual tension we had in college, the danger of unprotected sex with someone who I know has HIV, Herpes and Hepatitis, when I have spent my entire life trying to be careful. It was all awakening some carnal desire deep within me that I guess had never had a chance to show itself. It wanted him to fuck me raw, it wanted him to take control, to force his disease on me, it wanted him to be dangerous, to be psychotic, it wanted to dance with the devil. I was torn, something so clearly deadly but at the same time being so turned on. My mind was screaming, RUN! Delete your account all your email history, cancel your lease, get as far away from every possibility that he has of finding you, but this small part of me that was getting louder and louder was screaming “you know you want it, you know you want him to own you, to command you, to make you belong to him, there is nowhere else you can run, you will be his property, let him breed you, let his disease take over” My hands stood still on the keyboard as the battle in my mind raged on. What do I do?