TownTravellerMan

The younger thing you mentioned before makes sense. And yeah anal can take prep work and time but I don't mind the prep because the payoff is worth it. That's actually kinda wild. Do they message you and be like "let's hug". I have not come across that. You are right that's not sexual. I don't really have preference for tall or short but maybe some guys like tall guys. Do their profiles say if they are straight or gay or etc. Some have the option for cis now which is kinda crazy. I assume that means straight? Lol

I love the background and explanation you gave for this. I never thought about guys who are new to guys and being gay or bi. But that actually makes a lot of sense and as you said starting off as a side. I agree with being a side is probably fine for whatever reason someone chooses to be. What I've come across though are profiles where the guy states they are gay. I just kinda assumed they have been gay for years and for whatever reason don't bottom or top and that's what initially confused me and got me wondering about them. But I never considered that they could be new to men altogether. I am kinda glad it's not all one "sided" answers here as well 🤣 In all seriousness it's surprising in a good way. I thought that for a forum that caters around breeding it would be one sided. It's more interesting that it's not.

Maybe it hasn't caught on enough then. Power Cuddler doesn't sound like a bad shirt I wouldn't assume that would mean someone is 99% committed side. But I guess if they are the bath house to cuddle maybe that indicates a side? I haven't been to the bath house that frequently so I don't know cuddling there is the norm or not. Man glow in the dark bracelets. That takes me back. I do think that a bath house did that several several years ago. Rip to those who are even remotely color blind with that color scheme. I believe in the past when that was done in my area at least it was only two colors top or bottom lol. Blackout nights at the sex club/bath house were also more common back then so the color light indicator helped with that. Having the colors faded sounds like a horrible way to mix things up. I mean they are there for sex and so are you even if you deviate from what their color states by accident it shouldn't be that big of a deal I'd think. Going to a cumunion and not hearing the sounds of people fucking is absolutely insane. That's the entire purpose. Not one area at all? Maybe they are all in some corner or part of the area. At that point what is even the point of cumunion if no one is fucking. I've been to some in the past in my city and they have been an absolute blast. They have also had them at parliament house and those have been really fun too. As well as other events there. I would almost want my money back if I went to a cumunion and not a single guy was fucking at all lol. I mean travelling for sex in general can be a lot of fun. Did it a lot when I was younger still have some cities in mind that I'd love to visit again and some for the first time. In time I'm sure. I'm glad that where I am for the most part has a good scene though.

I honestly had no idea that it was such a new term. I didn't know that there was uncertainty about the actual term and the meaning itself as well. Pretty some sites like BBRT let you just select anal=no and oral=no if you don't like either of them. Functionally lesbian is kinda insane. I had no idea this was discussed before. I literally did a search for side and different things came up. Sideways, side eye, side? I didn't see anything specific to the side status. But maybe I'm just poor at searching here but I am new though. At least it was a good while ago that it was brought up. I agree about the shaming or being too hard part though. Especially mental illness since that's what they used to say about gays years ago. There have actually been Jack off groups and spanking groups in my area. The spanking groups years ago were actually pretty fun and they did lead to more. I think I went to one Jack off party once and it was kinda eh just guys jacking off not really my vibe. I did realize there are suck groups now but they are being held more like as contests and at bars no less. That's an interesting bar 🤣. But you are probably right that at the end of the day it's really just an oral group especially since they do it regularly. I can't speak much about cumUnion parties since the one I went to last guys were fucking and sucking and in the dark in the open. I didn't really see any sub group of people just doing oral or something outside of what the group is likely intended for. I have kinda realized that after I wrote this that I kinda did get together with a guy that did tell me he never tops for some reason. I didn't ask why because I wanted to see if there was a chance. And I did end up fucking him and I rode him for a little bit too. He seemed to enjoy the being rode part. So I am kinda curious about the mindset of guys who either say "Absolutely no anal or oral". Does their mind change if it they get together with a guy who they like? Or do they stick to their guns. I kinda feel for the most part there's a large majority of guys who once they are in the bedroom and in the heat of the moment might be wanting to do things that they normally don't do or haven't tried. But I understand that for the majority and depending on what kind of city area you live in. If you live in a place with not many guys or options around if all you saw is sides and no main entrees then yeah that would be pretty annoying. Sorry this side terminology is just throwing me off I'm trying to internalize my puns but it's failing. At least some of the profiles that I've seen they seem to like kissing, body contact, cuddling, sensual, and sometimes some nipple play and that's like foreplay basically. And that's actually great for foreplay. I am kinda curious of what constitutes as "release" for them or gets them off for the ones that don't like oral/anal at all. I know they have gay apparel and stuff for tops/bottoms, boy/Daddy/Sir and stuff like that. I wonder if there is side printed apparel now. I mean the whole pup thing wasn't really a thing years ago and now it so probably likely. I think ultimately I'll try not to write someone off from being side if there is chemistry, attraction, and other things there. But if it was looking like a relationship type deal then that itself would likely be a deal breaker. Curious to actually play with a side now and see what it's like. I mean I was before writing this but even more so now.

So I recently found out what this means. Or at least I think I did. I haven't been on apps for a number of years. I don't really ever remember this being a term or a thing several years ago. When someone messaged me asking about getting together and they mentioned they are side position. I asked what they meant by that. They said for them it meant they do everything but penetration. They said they sometimes do anal but not much. I got messaged by someone else to and their profile mentioned side and they said they don't do anal at all. I'm kinda curious when this started becoming a thing. I do know some websites/apps just let you not list anal or put that you aren't into that for a preference. Also kinda curious how people here feel about profiles that say side for position if they come across it. Even if the guy is cute or you like them would you still want to get together with them or hook up with them. Or is it more of an automatic pass. I think I'll still potentially get with someone who wanted to get together at a later date just to see how the chemistry goes. It's just weird seeing this now when I never saw it several years ago.

So this happened this morning. And yes it's the same man from the sodomized by a bear daddy post I wrote about. I have been trying to get back together with this man for almost a week now. Back and forth messages online has been painful and made me so regretful I didn't get his number last time. But we agreed yesterday to get together this morning and we did. I had some coffee and got prepped and headed to his place. I was so happy to see this large stocky bear man when I knocked and he opened the door. I still can't describe the build on this man how stocky and large he is not just bear large but stocky build in general. We immediately kissed and he grabbed me and embraced me. I instantly got hard and felt my cock in my pants rubbing against his hard cock in his shorts. After some making out we went upstairs. I stripped my clothes off and this daddy bear was all over me. We started making out again and he felt my ass as we were making out. God I love the way he likes to play with my ass while we make out. I lightly sucked his nipple and he groaned while I was doing this. He started playing with my hole and fingering it a little too. He then pushed me on the bed so I was on my back. He my hard cock in his mouth and slowly began sucking it. His mouth felt so good. He then pulled off and had me lay on the bed on all fours with my ass in the air. I knew I prepped pretty well and thought maybe my hole is loosened up more after being fucked twice yesterday. I thought maybe I could take him better then I did last time. I felt his thick cock head push in and it did feel really good. I started moaning groaning and crying out a little. I told him how good it felt and he started fucking me. He said he wanted me to suck his dick but he was so horny and wanted my ass that he couldn't wait. He started fucking me faster and said he liked that I'm enjoying it. I thought that I finally relaxed my ass enough to take him but I was wrong. I'm not sure if he was leading me into a false sense of security either. He pushed in further and I started crying out. He told me to open up my second hole. Second, fuck it felt like he was going into my third hole. I still don't know how he manages it but he started pushing in even deeper and I was crying out and moaning like a bitch in heat. Just like last time I was. I was a bitch being fucking by a hot daddy bear. He pulled out more and then kept shoving it in me deeper. He stopped doing fast strokes and did deeper thrusts. I don't know how he kept figuring out how to open my hole more. But despite the pain and discomfort I was still loving it. He pulled out for a minute and said he didn't want to cum to soon and he wanted me on my back. He put me on back and pushed his thick daddy bear dick in me again. Fuck he pushed in so fast he said that it popped right in. I literally did feel it pop in too. I could feel my hole opening up more but he still pushed in farther and still making me squeal and moan while he fucked me. He started fucking me faster and I felt my body start to tingle. He adjusted the position so I was on my side and he continued to fuck me. Each position he changed seemed like he found a way to get in deeper and deeper. After fucking me on my side he put me on my belly. He got on top of me completely and I was at his mercy as he pounded away at my hole pushing it in deeper and deeper. My body was still sort of feeling numb and my hands were starting to go numb. Fuck. I heard him grunt and his breathing pick up and knew he was going to cum. I heard him shout and felt him fill up my hole. He layed on top of me for a few moments while he was catching his breath. After he pulled out we lay next to each other like the previous time. We both talked for a bit and caught up with each other. He has has had some fun sexual encounters with others and I told him about mine. After we were in the middle of telling fun stories to each other he said he wanted me to cum. I was a little nervous about cumming on the spot and I tried but it was not fully happening. Then something changed. He mentioned something about my hole being loose. But it was the tone and how he said it. I asked if he liked fucking me deep and he said he loved it. He said he loved wrecking my hole with his big thick dick. I told him when he fucked me I was moaning yelping like a bitch getting fucked. He said I was and he loved it and said it was hot. He said he loved breeding me and fucking my ass. The more he talked dirty to me the harder I got. He kept talking dirty to me telling me how hot it was to fuck me and how good my hole felt. I was not only rock hard but I was starting to cum. I came on both of us around our stomach. Fuck it felt so good since I hadn't cum in a while too. I was glad that we both got off. I forgot that I did used to love it when guys talked dirty to me I guess that doesn't change. But also the way he did it. I showered afterwards and this time we exchanged numbers. I'll definitely see him again. He is an incredible man especially when it comes to fucking. And I love how he's honest about his encounters and seems to like when I tell him about mine. At least I got his load unlike last time but that still didn't really bother me. But damn it's been a few past two days. Will probably take a break from all this fun for a while and recharge. Until the next encounter.

Alternative title: Ass flooded with cum by big horny bear. Because that's how I felt after. But I'm getting ahead of myself. When I was younger I used to fool around with a guy who was semi around my age I think. God I can still remember what he kinda looked like he was like a kid we both were. We fooled around in public spaces that was actually our first meeting in a bathroom where we both fucked and sucked each other it was great. Then we met a few other times in other semi public spaces and once in a hotel I believe. He still remembered me all this years and reached out to me but he's now in an open relationship. We've been texting back and forth and decided to get together. Yesterday was finally the day. I had a hell of a time finding his place that he had to come out of his condo. I was shocked to see a large bear of a mean with beautiful fur on his chest and sexy salt and pepper beard come out to greet me. I said hello to him and we walked inside. As soon as we walked into his unit he immediately grabbed me and started making out with me. I had no idea he was that much into kissing I didn't remember if we did that much in the past. When we kissed my dick was getting hard in my jockstrap and I could feel his. I embraced him and grabbed his back holding him tighter. He grabbed my ass. It felt like he was trying to lift me with how much he was grabbing my ass. We broke the embrace for a moment and he welcomed me. I stripped and put my clothes to the side. He was waiting on the bed. Just looking at this sexy bear of a man damn I can't believe I remember him from 10 years ago and how much different he looked. He really has grown in the best way possible. I crawled onto the bed and we went back to making out. I explored his body and licked his ears and bite them I also licked and sucked on his nipples. I noticed his hairy pits as well and started licking them and rubbing my nose throughout his pits. Damn he had such a hot smell and I know he just got out of the shower. Finally I started to go lower and admired his treasure trail and licked his treasure trail. Pretty much every move or involvement I did with my tongue caused him to moan. And then finally I got to his cock and damn he was also mostly hard. I took his cock in my mouth and started sucking him. He was groaning and moaning while I was sucking him. I was enjoying feeling his cock harden in my mouth. I pulled off his cock for a moment and licked his balls and took his balls in my mouth. God I loved just exploring every scent and aspect of him. I really wasn't sure what to expect but was not expecting any of this. He grabbed me and pulled me back up and we made out some more. He rolled me on my side until I was on my back and he started to explore my body. He licked and sucked my nipples and bit them which I love. I was moaning out and he made his way down to my cock. Damn I remembered how good at sucking cock he was. I was getting hard and leaky to the more he sucked my cock. He played with my balls too and even bit them a little or put pressure on them. Fuck that felt so good. Reminded me of when my balls were being roughly hit at the bar the other night. I forgot I kinda enjoy that sensation. He stopped playing with my balls and leaned back over and kissed me some more. Damn I could taste my own fucking precum as we made out. Fucking hot. He started to make motions like he was going to fuck me on my back. But then he decided he wanted me on all fours. I got on all fours and felt his cock push in my hole. Fuck I forgot how great his cock felt. It's longer then most cocks I've had in a while and damn he felt so good sinking into me. He started fucking me and I kept hearing him moan and groan while fucking me. I backed up on his cock more and just let him fuck me. He did not last long and I felt him flood my ass. Holy damn. I could tell he was on sensory overload but he must have not jacked off in a while. He stayed in me for a little while when he continued to empty his load into me. Fuck I was not expecting any of this. He pulled off and we both layed besides each other going back to making out again. I think I've mentioned this before but damn it's so hot to make out with a hot bearded bear when my beard touches his. It's like a magnetic attraction with the hair. But damn I loved making out with him so much. I broke away from making out for a moment and asked if he thinks I've changed at all over the years. He said I look exactly the same except for the hair and beard. We both laughed at this and continued to make out. As much fun as we were having romping around in bed and exchanging lips and saliva. And hell yeah it was fun. It was time for me to fuck. I put him on his belly and lubed up my cock and started to fuck him. Ugh he was so fucking tight I was loving fucking him. Literally straight out of a porn or something or a comedy sketch there was a knock on the door. I froze and he said he forgot he had maintenance coming over that day. We had apparently been fucking, making out, fooling around for a few hours without realizing what time it was. Fuck. He said he did have to tend to them and reminded me of something he had to do later as well which is why we scheduled early afternoon. Fuck. I got off him and I was softening anyways from the shock and we both got dressed. We both kissed and said goodbye and said we'd see each other again. He needed a little more time to clean up before I got there and I ran into some traffic getting there and a little time spent finding his unit. So it was a little bit of a misfire on both our ends. I was not disappointed at all though. He was such a hot fucking man. And later when I got home I realized he fucking flooded my ass. So much cum came out of my ass. When I showered and thought it was all gone nope more cum came out. I used something to check and make sure I was clean and more cum. Damn what a fucking stud. Onto the next part. Reunion with the Silver Sir Top I mentioned previously that I got together with a top and then afterwards headed to the bookstore. I think I mentioned a long the lines of in a past relationship it was one fuck and done time to go to bed and sleep. And now being "free" I don't have to do it anymore. I probably do not get a lot of detail in that top so this time I will go over that more. After the fun fuck with my bear friend I fell asleep for a few hours after a light dinner. I woke up and saw that top online. I haven't seen him in a while but also haven't been on those sites in a while. I messaged him. I don't think he fully remembered me because I had to go through several steps and chats for him to agree to meet but it's been a while I guess. It was worth it though. I put on a different jockstrap and headed out. I knew where he was at least and when I went to his unit and greeted him we both kissed. While we were slowly kissing he gently guided my head to his nipple. He called me a good boy as I sucked and serviced his nipple. I forgot that his chest is extremely furry. Hot salt and pepper daddy fur damn. I could taste his chest hair as I was sucking his nipples. When we kissed he a had light trimmed beard as well. He told me to make myself comfortable. I stripped into my jockstrap and we both made our way to the bedroom. He later on the bed and I got on top of him and kissed him some more. He is more of a light kisser but it's still hot and passionate. He again directed my focus to his nipples afterwards. He had nice perky nipples and I loved sucking and chewing on them. Hearing his moans just got me more excited. He seemed like he had enough foreplay and guided my head towards his hard cock. Fuck I forgot how big and thick his cock was. But I remembered servicing that leather Sir in the hallway several nights ago I knew I could do it. I took his cock all the way down my throat. I enjoyed sucking and deep throating him. He was groaning and moaning and looking at me with approval and also calling me a good boy. He pulled me up closer to him and we kissed some more. He asked me if I wanted to get fucked and I told him I did. We maneuvered around and he put me on all fours. He threw the poppers my way and I took a hit. I could feel his thick cock pushing against my hole. Even with my hole still relatively cummy and lubed to a sense he was still big and thick. Fuck I felt it when he pushed in and I groaned. He started to push in more and told me to relax my hole. I tried to control my breathing and took deep breathes and relaxed more. He started fucking me more in rhythm. He asked a few times if it felt good and I told him it felt great. He told me that my ass felt nice and tight. And it was true even though I got fucked prior my hole still felt tight. I remembered that he preferred to do the work so instead of backing up on his dick frequently I backed up and tried to relax my hole so he could have fun pounding away at my ass and he did. He wanted to switch positions and he put me on my back. I looked at him as he pushed his thick dick in my hole and groaned and moaned. He started fucking me more. I reached up and started playing with his nipples and that really turned him on. I loved feeling his furry chest hair as I played with his nipples. I heard him shout that he was going to cum. I felt his cock harden and felt his load flood into me. It was another huge load and he was filling me up. He stayed in me for a little bit until he emptied his load completely. Then he pulled his cock out and he layed back on the bed. We both laid on the bed together and we made out a little bit more. I caressed his chest and nipples and he seemed to enjoy caressing my hair. We both talked a little and kinda caught up since we haven't played in a while. After that he had to get going and so did I. I went to the bathroom and pushed his load out. Probably still the load from before but damn it was so much cum that came out. I loved it. I got dressed and kissed him goodbye and said that we'll get together again soon. He was a little bit hesitant to fuck me at first because he knew I didn't get fucked much. I think he might prefer looser holes over tighter holes but he still enjoyed it. He said we might work on loosening my hole some next time as well. I know I am out of practice when it comes to being fucked probably but take any practice I can get and appreciate it. I had a little bit of congestion today too so I wasn't in top or peak performance for either session but I enjoyed both. I actually almost went to the baths after me and my friend got interrupted by maintenance. I decided that it was better to go home eat and sleep and it was the right call I was very well rested to service the Silver Sir Top I was with later in the evening. These were both fun and great experiences and I enjoyed having a cummy hole for the good half of the end of the day. Glad I have a place to share these.

Pretty much only every been in relationships with older men starting when I was in my 18/19. The idea of a top being more mature and wiser is mostly true. Not always. A Daddy/boy, Dom/sub, Sir/boy can be a great dynamic. And when you are younger you do tend to look up to the daddy top more for wisdom and knowledge. I've had more of a bdsm servitude relationships where I was a boy and he was a Sir and one where I was a boy for a Daddy and recently more of a traditional monogamous relationship that ended recently. I can't say why I have always been attracted to older. Yes the older features have always been hot to me sometimes I wonder if it's the experience or wisdom. It can be hot and I guess maybe others percieve it as looking hot seeing a Daddy/boy couple no idea. There can definitely be some challenges sometimes a huge age gap like that interests, hobbies and mindsets might be a different. A young man is still growing, learning, developing an exploring. An older man has experience, patience, understanding but is sometimes set in their ways and ideals. It's a weird feeling I'm no longer young i don't think. I'm in my early 30s. Ironically when I was 18-20 most older guys and daddies thought I was too young. It was a little easier in early 20s. I see a mix of online and profiles of some daddies only wanting younger guys and some only wanting older guys. I am literally in the divide. At this point I don't think I am actively trying to date or form a relationship with an older guy again. But the thing about that is really is I've gotten older so depending on the age the gap in age isn't as big as it was 10 years ago. Some things I've pondered over the last few weeks is what if I was just friends/fuck buddies with a previous relationship would things have gone better? Perhaps. In general I think guys around my age group of might be able to relate to a little easier. I'll still have sex and fun with whatever guy i want. I'm not trying to be close minded either but just past experiences have made me cautious. But to the original question yeah Daddy/boy relationships are hot so is being called boy and calling the man Sir or daddy. That will never probably not be hot to me no matter how old i get. I already know there guys in their 50s who consider themselves a boy and I think that's probably how it will go for me years later too.

God it was so many years ago. I was a condom Nazi from when I first came out pro condoms everything. I got in a relationship with a Sir in my early 20s, Due to the nature of the relationship and my age and drive he was fine with me playing outside relationship but had to be with condoms. Although technically I think a few trips to sex clubs one or two visits I swear I had cum in my ass when the top had a condom or said they used a condom. I probably got stealthed at least once but I don't count that. I remember it mostly clearly I think it was just me and Sir in the home in the afternoon. I think a few months into the relationship. Maybe we were laying in bed maybe I finished my duties. But he told me wanted to fuck me. He sort of got me trained at that point to suck his cock and swallow his load since early on I was not good at swallowing. And he trained me to get fucked by him as well since early on I was not the best at getting fucked. Everyone has to start somewhere. I was excited because he did not fuck me much. I'm damn..getting hard just thinking about this and typing this. It was truly a hallmark moment. I think in bed when I was excited about him fucking me I was waiting for him to grab a condom from the drawer with the lube but he didn't grab it. I asked what he was doing and he said he was going to make me his boy permanently. He said I've been such a good boy with my training and he loves me and he was going to bareback me and fuck me raw. He said I'll never forget this moment and he was right. I don't remember if I hesitated I think I did feel emotional but I told him since it's him and we're in a relationship and he's my Sir I trust and love him. I remember him mounting his raw cock in my hole. I cannot remember the sensation but I remember my reaction. The man that I loved and admired taking me completely as his own raw with no rubber or barriers. I think I begged him to fuck me. I believe he fucked me on all fours and on my belly. I think he also fucked me on my back because he wanted to look at me as I was getting fucked raw bareback for the first time. I don't remember if I asked for his load or if he asked if I wanted it. If he asked me I probably said that I did. I do vaguely remember him fucking me harder and faster and telling me that I am his boy, his bitch, his lover, his submissive, and that I will always be his. And then he shot his load deep in me. I don't remember the man ever being that passionate but I think we did kiss during him breeding me and after. And then I believe after we just layed together. We might have slept together..I mean we did but literally. That man when we first met and over the years barely showed me passion and affection sexually. But when he did he left his mark. I remember once being so horny sleeping with him in bed that I rubbed my ass against his cock and got him hard. I remember spitting on my hand and hole and when his dick was hard in his sleep I backed up against him. I remember rocking my ass back and forth on his cock until he bred me in his sleep. I remember him waking up confused and me pretending to be asleep. I think he said what the fuck or something and went to the bathroom and then turned over and went back to sleep. I remember when his leather buddies were over once he told them about that. He said it something like "That damn horny boy backed up on my cock while I was sleeping and rode it bare and raw and I bred him in my sleep. I can't believe he did that." I can't remember now if he was being coy but most of the men thought it was hot. I think there was only one who said it was disrespectful. But I remember blushing at the time and also not being in the room but close by because I had a crush on one of them. And he was one of the ones who said it was hot and he would be happy if a boy did that for him. But I learned later on after semi having a play session with him years later that he was kind of worse in using a boy and not giving sexual gratification then my actual Sir was. That was a few months after he bred me and marked me as his for the time. And by marked I don't mean poz because he was neg but marked me as his boy/sub since that was our relationship dynamic. I learned slightly later over the years why he showed me less affection and some of it was manipulation and there was another factor as well. But even when we lived together by ourselves for a year outside of that place as *roomates* he still did not without the other factor being there. He was a very complicated man with his thoughts, emotions and feelings. But I do believe he did love me and cared for me in his own way. He left such an impression on me at a young age I haven't thought about him in a long time. He also disappeared off the face of the earth after he moved out where we were living but that was in his nature and something he's done before to others as well. But he trained me well early on and helped me harness and nurture my submissive nature. I'll always be grateful to him for that and a few other things. Oof I didn't mean for this to be an emotional and detailed post. Whoops.

The slut shaming is the big thing. Sometimes I wonder if it's people actually judging you or projecting their own insecurities on you. But at bars or clubs or bath houses people talk. They can even fuck you and breed you or not and tell their buddy "Man that guy is such a cum dump they are such a whore". Whether they mean this in a compliment or insult is up to how they say it or the person they are saying it too. Or it could even potentially be someone wanting to take you down a notch. I don't really know how it works. But I've always had a working theory that a popular run of guys runs a social group of who's accepted as an acceptable slut and who's not. Or cum dump. And if you aren't in then you can't sit with us. Mean girls reference i think. But yes it can work against you reputation wise if someone you like might judge you afterwards or if they only want to fuck you in a certain scenario because of how they view you. But if you are a cum dump do you care how they actually percive you. In theory a cum dump should be able to get as many dicks or loads as they want so who judges or accepts them shouldn't matter as long as they are getting cock. I kinda wonder in general how guys in hook up apps or websites are affected by using their face picture like if someone near them recognizes them or someone at work or they know personally. But adding being a cum slut to that is an extra layer. I know most people probably don't think about all this but I'm glad you recognize it. There's an old saying I'll get wrong about not pissing in a kettle where you are. But essentially meaning say if you live in a big city and you are a cum dump not only bar wise and guys will you potentially gain a reputation but even outside gay bars and gay life people might know. Some will go fuck around at a city or area outside of their own but not everyone has that option. I just feel in general cum dumps have more to lose or worry about reputation wise compared to a guy that's a slut or whore with some guys not all. But I don't know if true cum dumps actually care or think about any of this. I wonder if the true ideal relationship for a cum dump would be to have an owner or handler that encourages and fulfills their need and has other guys use them to fulfill both involved needs. Or just an open relationship in general.

I love that there is positivity and acceptance in the responses even though it can be viewed as negative. I am curious what the top version of a cum dump is. A stud?

This is such a great question and people have great responses. It's something I'm either trying to figure out myself. I did get pretty good advice a little while ago basically someone telling me it's okay to be a whore, slut, or cumdump if you want. Just be sex positive about what you want to be and not let others judge you. I have never really heard the term sex positive before but I love it. I did used to think about getting fucked everyday and I did the prep. Would follow a routine to clean myself out every morning and then be online constantly looking for the next hunt or load or go to bars or clubs and get load counts. Hell I had a system and a good amount of fuck buds and I could sort of plan to start the night getting fucked by a top who liked to fuck quick and was one and done and then go to another top that liked loads in me and liked to add one or two. This is before going to either hook up with someone or several guys or going to a bar or bath house like place and take multiple guys/loads. And yes bending over in a bar or public place was so easy for me to get many guys to fuck and breed me that I lost count of loads sometimes. So strange I rarely caught anything lol prep was just coming out back then and not really available. As fun as it was the issue with being a cumdump for me was letting it take control over everything. Waking up and just focusing on trying to find someone to hook up with or moving onto so many different guys and not really appreciating the ones I had. The hunt has always been fun or interesting whether online or in person. But it can be tiring on all fronts. The reputation thing is also spot on. The reputation of being a cum dump is something you need to own I think. It's probably harder if you don't have a lot of friends or support. Then you have to deal with however guys percive you. But what someone mentioned about a cumdump being someone you don't take home and cuddle just fuck somewhere and leave can definitely be true. But maybe things have kinda changed on views of cum dumps now. Maybe because prep exists, it's really common especially when you see it in public bars or bath houses. Also the guys that are being the biggest cum dumps are usually really attractive so that in itself might keep away some of the stigma. Because in a sense being a whore or slut has been kinda trendy in the past especially those who can pull it off. Eh. I already know why I kinda can't be one right now. Several reasons. But me saying that sort of feels like I'm repressing it which I think I am. I'm not doing it to make myself look better or feel better or superior by not being one especially in public. At the same time this is always something I wondered about it in the back of my mind in the past and even currently. But what if someone potentially that might be a fun hook up, friendship or more saw you out being a cum dump and their opinion of them lowered. Well while I just thought of this using some common rationale what are they doing at a place where guys hook up and whore around whether public or not. And if they do judge you for that then they probably are not someone you really want to get with because their view on sex like that might be negative. I've always been iffy about dark rooms though. They can be fun but It's always amazed me how some guys might not want anything to do with you in a bar or public place or just in the light. But in a dark room even if they see you going in they might follow and play with you. And after might go back on not wanting anything to do with you. I know that's not every guy and every situation but I've noticed it in the past. Or more recently. I've also had the experience at book stores where in a room a guy is really intimate or passionate regardless of what act involved in they state some kind of limit like "Oh I don't fuck guys in places like this or no I don't do that with guys here". But then again they are also at the place. I am probably overthinking all this way too much. I had clear and concise thoughts in my head but thinking of everything is becoming foggy. It could be with my situation where I am kinda "free" that maybe I'm letting it lots of repressed feeling and actions i couldn't do over these past years. Ironically someone I spoke to recently I told him a little of my experiences lately and he told me I'm a cum dump in a good way though. I told him this is light compared to how I used to be and his response was "light". I just might not be able to escape it. I wonder if being subservient natured sexually kinda fates or leads you into it. I can easily tell from past, present and future that if I run into a top that wants to whore me out I will not turn them down. I mean I've already kinda shown that. That makes me kind of wonder if you take any and all loads if a top orders you and you do it be subservient if that also makes you a cum dump. This was probably too much on this but I've thought about all of this way too much. Next my thoughts on couples with open relationships but I think I'll wait until I play with one again I need a refresher.

It's been forever I don't even remember the feeling anymore. I should change that 🙂 It can hurt a little more yes. It also depends on the size of the guys cock. Smaller to average one is a great feeling. I do remember being fucked by a big dick top years ago in a hotel. It's not so much that he was aggressive but he was passionate and forceful and huge. I remember bleeding in the shower the next morning. A little fucked up but I just got hard typing that lol. It wasn't that bleeding part but just how passionately the man fucked me. I was fucked raw and bred by tops with PAs after that just don't recall it as much. I wouldn't refuse a top with a PA. But honestly speaking tops can remove the PAs for the most part. So if you don't feel comfortable doing it they don't have to wear it. Sucking socks that have PAs is fun but if it's the round PA that is literally a fun metallic tasting obstacle challenge. Scratch that I remembered another experience where a large dick boy topped me. He was trying to fuck me gently because he was young and kind. But his Sir or Master was not kind and intentionally got on top of the boy that was on top of me and fucked him so his PA dick would go in me more intensely. I remember screaming how could I forget that. My cock apparently didn't though lol.

This is going to be another long one folks. If you are interested more in the loads bred and getting bred skip to the highlighted bookstore section. If not then enjoy reading about the bar experiences. Well Friday night just came and went lol. What a night. I was a little disappointed in the evening by being turned down by someone I wanted to see. I expected it all week but still disappointing. So I decided to prepare to go out. While preparing I chatted with a cute younger bearded guy. We were going to meet up and after I finished prepping and getting ready. I let him know I was about to leave and on my way like he told me too. Then he texted me never mind that he's too tired and to not come over. Well like damn. So ironic I just had a conversation with someone the other night about being stood up in messed up ways and I said it hasn't really happened to me. I know it could have been worse but definitely an experience. Since I was already on my way I figured fuck it I'll head out to the bar. I don't drink but decided maybe I can find someone to have fun with. I got there and saw it was not packed. I was surprised there was no cover and just ordered a soda. I walked around a little bit and went to a secluded corner. I checked my phone a little bit to see if any action was around but did not see any. I decided to go into the dark room area. I was a little intimidated so after navigating a little I decided to leave and that I had to pee. After peeing I went back to my corner and stuff did not see anyone around. Decided to get a little confidence and try again in the dark room area. I went to a corner started drinking my drink while I were watching some guys being fucked, sucking off someone and making out. I didn't notice at first but an older grey haired daddy with a cute goatee was looking at me. I felt like a deer trapped in my headlights. I was nervous and decided to reach my hand out. I was going for his nipples but he had me grab his hard cock. It was wet so I figured someone was sucking him earlier or maybe he fucked someone. He grabbed my nipple and started twisting it. He was twisting it rather hard. He started grabbing me roughly too. Fuck he has hot. He started hitting my balls and cock with his fist too. I just moaned and groaned while he did this. He had an intense look while he was looking at me and called me a good boy. He grabbed my cock too. I could have potentially tried to suck him I think he would have let me. But he had an intense energy and I felt like I was putty in his hands so I did not do anything unless he initiated it. After playing with my nipples some more and giving them some good wear he asked me to go to the urinal and wait there. So I left the dark room area and went to the urinal exactly where he asked me to go. I started pissing because I did have to pee. I was getting nervous but it didn't take long and he was standing beside me in the urinal with his cock out. I got a better look at him now. He had a nice sexy gray beard to match his short cut hair. He wagged his cock in front of me and asked if I like his cock. I told him I did and he played with my nipples and cock again. Someone else came over next to him he also seemed like an older guy and taller. He told me that that he wanted me to suck his friend's cock right there in the urinal area and told me to get on my knees. Without hesitation I got on my knees. His friend looked at me and grinned and put his cock in my mouth. The older sexy gray bearded daddy told me to suck his friend off. He said be a good boy and suck his friend's cock for daddy. His cock was nice it was a little soft I figured maybe he got some action but he was moaning while I was sucking it. It was starting to get harder again too. I kept sucking more and more the sexy gray bearded daddy commanded me. I felt his friend's cock fully hard and he was fucking my face. He told me to suck his friend and take his load. I felt the salty taste of cum and started moan more and his friend shouted out. He shot his load down my throat. His friend pulled his cock out and smiled at me and left. The gray bearded daddy told me to stand up. He told me I'm a good boy and a good cocksucker sucking his friend. He kept looking at me again and playing with my nipples and hitting my hard cock. He said he's going to be around later but wants to get my number. He said he wants me to service him, his partner and his friends. After that experience I decided to go back to my corner and have some more sips of my soda while replaying everything that just happened. Haven't sucked cock at the urinals at a bar since I was way younger. And the energy that man was giving off fuck it was amazing. I checked on my phone to see if anyone was around but still no one. I decided to go back to the dark room area. I went to a different corner this time and had a nice position where I was semi away from others but could see what was going on. I was glad there was some light too it was still dark but some light. A guy I noticed started coming closer to the corner. He eventually made his way over to where I was. He was a cute bear with a short beard. He stood next to me so I reached down for his bulge and he was semi hard. Damn he had a nice fat thick cock. I started playing with his nipples a little and he moaned. We kissed a little a bit and he started grabbing my ass. I decided to ditch my shorts and reveal my jockstrap I have been wearing. We made out a little more and he wanted to suck my cock so I let him suck it. I saw there were some bears near us that were fucking and sucking as well. I was hard as well and we went back to making out and more foreplay. For some reason I did not try to suck him. No idea why he had a great fat curved cock. He also grabbed my ass so the chances of him fucking me were high. But I just didn't for some reason. An older daddy came over and started playing with his cock and grabbing mine. I started playing with the older daddy's nipples and he moaned. I felt the older daddy's cock it was pretty nice as well. But again I did not try to suck him even though it would have been easy too. After all three of us were playing with each other's cocks and exploring each other's body's the older daddy bent down and started sucking my cock. The short haired bearded bear I was playing with earlier got behind the older daddy and started pushing his cock in. Damn it was hot to watch and have the older daddy suck my cock. I was hard watching this and getting excited. The short bearded bear fucked him for a good while and the older daddy was great at sucking my cock. I was just taking everything in. The sound of him getting fucked, guys near us getting fucked and sucked. Taking everything in just made me so damn hard and excited. I started fucking the older daddy's mouth while the short bearded daddy was fucking his ass. I saw the short bearded daddy start to tense up and knew he was going to breed him. I heard him shout as he bred the hot sexy older daddy. I did not cum and wasn't trying to so I pulled my cock out of the older daddy's mouth. They both looked spent and satisfied and left. I just stood there for a moment and put my shorts back on and took a sip of my drink. I looked around and didn't see much else going on so I left the dark room area. I was feeling pretty good but I had to piss so I went back to the urinal area. While I was pissing and replaying everything that happened the gray bearded dominant daddy came over. For some reason I thought he left. My eyes were shocked and he probably took notice. He greeted me and grabbed my nipples again. He really loved twisted them and playing with them hard and I loved it I don't get them worked over much. He said he wanted my number so I could service him and his partner at a future date. I gave him my number right there at the urinal. He told me I'm a good cock sucker sucking his friend off. He said i'm a hungry bottom too. He told me to look at his cock rock hard and I did. He put my hand on his cock and let me stroke it. He grabbed my cock again. He then told me to stand in the corner away from him for a moment. I did and he just kept looking at me. He said I'm a cumdump. I wanted to tell him I didn't take a single load tonight because I didn't.. I wanted to tell him I haven't even sucked any cock. I wanted to say something and tried to but I said nothing. He said I'm a good cocksucker and good hungry bottom and I'm going to service him and his friends when they call on me. He said I'm a good and horny boy. He called me a cum dump again saying I wanted to get fucked. He said he will fuck me and so will his partner and friends. He grabbed my nipples again and then grabbed my hair. He said he'll call me soon and called me a good boy and left. There was just something about his presence that screamed aggressive dominant daddy. The way he ordered me around. grabbed me, led me, the pressure he put on my nipples, hitting my balls, and the way he squeezed my cock and my chest. I loved the intensity. Took me back to memories when I was younger at the leather bars and was nervous and a leather Sir guided me. Fun times back then. But these were starting to be new fun times. I decided to go back to my corner and check my phone again to see who was around and to my surprise I saw a message from a certain daddy bear. He asked how my night was going and if I was getting any. I responded a little and asked how he was doing and what he's up to. I figured if they were available I'd go see them after all this. On my way back to the dark room area I saw a man dressed in mostly light leather. He looked like a mustached daddy with a leather cap. And it looked like a boy was servicing him. I looked his way and he looked back at me. I decided to keep walking and went back to the dark room area. Not much was going on so I decided to take another piss. Some younger guy but kinda cute came up behind me and grabbed my shoulder. They asked me my name and I was kinda dumbfounded. I also played dumb and they said nevermind. In the back of my mind I am still a little cautious if there's anyone there trying to see what I'm doing but I know after all I've done it's kinda dumb to worry about that at this point. After pissing I went back to my corner. Checked and no new messages so decided to go back to the dark room. I walked in and saw that leather daddy by himself. He was just standing there so I reached over and lightly touched his nipple. This seemed to please him and he groaned out. He told me to squeeze his nipples harder so I did. He put my hand on his cock and it was hard and wet. He was probably fucking someone earlier. He asked if I wanted to go outside the dark room area and I said yes. He went outside the dark room area but still in the main hallway. He went up against the wall and stood there. He told me to take off my shirt so I did. He told me to get on my knees so I got on my knees on the bar room floor in the open where anyone could see what was going on. He looked stunning in his black leather cap, black harness, leather arm band and black boots with underwear on. I looked up at him and started sucking his cock. His cock tasted slimy and tasted like lube so he was definitely fucking someone earlier. He commanded me to grab the top of his leather boots so I did. Then I got to focus on nothing but sucking his huge cock. I was loving sucking his cock even with the taste of lube possibly cum I was enjoying servicing this man in the open. He was starting to get bigger and I was getting a little nervous. I still don't think my cock sucking skills are quite up to par but I was enjoying taking his cock down my throat and servicing him at my own pace. I was grateful he was allowing this. My eyes still started to get teary because he was big. I looked up at him several times while I was servicing him and he smiled calling me a good boy. He was starting to fuck my face and I was doing a good job at not choking. I did gag a few times but compared to how much I would have been gagging my throat felt pretty relaxed and maybe it was grabbing his leather boots the whole time but I was loving this. I decided to take this a step further and asked him to hold on for a moment. I took off my shorts and and exposed myself naked except for my jockstrap. Now I was really looking the part and I got back on my knees and resumed sucking his cock. I loved the tears in my eyes as I was taking his cock deeper. I loved sucking his cock from a bottom angle with my throat and then raising my head higher and sort of sucking down on his cock more. I was having fun exploring different ways to service this man's cock. He was rock hard at this point and I was doing a great job at deep throating him. He kept moaning out saying what a good boy I am. He said he was going to cum and give me his load. I kept sucking and he shot his leather daddy load in my throat. Fuck it tasted so good. I know I could have easily turned around and had him fuck me but for some reason I didn't. After sucking his load out we stood up and made out a little bit. He was a good kisser. He explored each other's body's for a little bit and then talked. He mostly talked but it was nice hearing his experiences and learning more about him. He mentioned the bottom boy earlier was a newer boy and was not as good or trained so he did not play with him for long and did not want to go through training him. This made me feel kinda good because I have been that newer bottom boy years ago the bars. It's good to know that one advantage I have is years of experience I was glad to hear this and would store this information in my mind for a later day. He told me fucked someone else because the boy said he did not clean out and he was not going to risk it. I do not blame him at all. He told me he had a nap before going out and prepped and cleaned out before coming to the bars. I told him I did as well and I always make sure i'm clean and prepped when I head out for fun. He said that I know the correct procedure and that I'm a good boy. He said he was tired and after he cums he gets sleepy. He said it was getting late and he was going to head out. He told me he will likely go to a leather bar tomorrow and said that I should go. I told him I'll consider it but I haven't been to that leather bar in years so wasn't entirely sure. He said I was a cute and good boy and he hoped to see me again. We kissed again and he left. I went back to piss and then went back to the corner to check my phone. Damn I got a message from the daddy bear online and he said he was just at home playing with his cock. I messaged him that I'd love to come over and get together if he was still up and wanting to. I was kicking myself for not getting his number last time but that's on me. I also saw that the gray bearded daddy I was playing with texted me. He texted me saying what a hot boy. He said I was a hungry boy and he likes his cock sucked and worshiped. He asked me to send a picture of my cock. So I went back to the urinal and took a picture of my cock and sent it to him. He texted me that I'm a good boy. I decided to get another drink. I already got a few drinks in between this I think this was my fourth soda haha. The bartender was pretty nice at least not much effort on his part I made sure to tip as well though. The soda tasted good mixed with a little salty cum in my mouth. I went back to my corner and saw someone on another platform message me. They said it shows I'm close by and they want to get together. Their profile looked nice but no profile pic. I asked them for one but they said they are at the bar and we both confirmed we were at the same bar. I decided to go piss again. I saw a guy on his knees in the urinal area while I was trying to piss. He asked me if he could drink my piss. I said sure. Something I have not really had someone do for me in a long time. He started to drink my piss and then he spit it out and got up. Weird interaction but I figured oh well. I tried to piss and piss was finally come out while I was at the urinal. He came back a few minutes later apologizing. He said he's trying to learn to drink piss but he's new at it. Heh amateur. I was getting flashbacks of when I drank a man's piss at a gay campground years ago. And then in Ft Lauderdale at a leather bar where I drank a drunk man's piss once and even at a leather bar in town. But I did remember the first few times can be intimidating. I drank nothing but water all day too except soda at the bar so I knew it wasn't the intensity that was the issue. I just smiled and told him that I'm already done pissing but told him maybe next time. I decided to check my phone again but the bar was closing. I told the guy online that the bar is closing and he said we'll meet in the parking lot. After way too much back and forth we did meet. He was cute I think he was Romanian or something but he had a nice short trimmed bear and he was a nice bear of a man. We talked about where to potentially go and decided that we might try the bookstore if it's not packed. I drove off and went to the bookstore I got lucky that there was a parking spot left. I did not see him there so figured he bailed and checked my phone and no messages. No loss I don't think the vibe or chemistry was quite there anyways. When I was pulling to the bookstore I saw a cute short bearded man entering. In case you were wondering this is where the real fun and loads begin. The Bookstore I walked into the bookstore and wasted no time going to the counter to pay to go in. The parking lot was packed so I was surprised that there was only a few guys walking around. But I noticed lots of the single booths were locked on closed so likely lots of action going on. I walked around and went towards the back area. I went to the glory hole area that I generally prefer last time one of the doors had a maintenance sign on it but this time no sign. And one of the glory hole doors was peeked open so I walked inside and closed and locked the door. I saw someone through the glory hole. I crouched down and saw that sexy short bearded guy. I looked up at him and he looked down at me. He said that he was looking to suck cock. I said sure and stood up and pulled my cock out of my jockstrap. I was a little tired before I came in here since it was pretty late. In my mind I had some self doubt and worry that I probably wasn't going to get that hard or he was going to get bored and say no thanks. To my surprise he had a great mouth. He didn't fuck around playing with the foreskin like some guys do. He focused on sucking my cock and he was choking on it too. It was not even fully hard and he was choking on my cock a little. It was kinda hot. I kinda liked hearing the sound of him chocking on it and feeling his saliva. Fuck this was a hot guy. I started fucking his face a little bit and my cock was getting harder. It was not fully hard yet but he pulled off my cock. He asked if I wanted to fuck him. I said hell yeah and asked if he wanted to go to a private room. He said sure. We both exited the glory hole doors and looked around. To our surprise there was no open rooms available. Damn. We walked back over to the original area we were at. I remember the first row of glory holes is a small booth but it doesn't have any holes. I figured fuck it and opened the door and we both walked inside. There was also a small chair in the corner. I got a good look at him he was a sexy bearded man. Nice bushy beard he looked a bit younger but he was a little short and stocky and cute. He did not seem to be into foreplay or anything he went right down to business and got on his knees and sucked my cock. Fuck his mouth felt so damn good. He started choking a little more and gagging on my cock. Damn I guess I don't get my cock sucked enough. His talent with sucking cock seemed to be impressive so I don't think it's an ego remark to think that he was choking because the size of my cock even not fully hard. Heh that turned me on and made me hornier. I was starting to get a little cocky which I don't generally get on the top side since that's the role I was on at the moment. I started fucking his face and hear him gag and choke some more. I did pull back though so he wouldn't completely choke and could breath. He pulled off my cock for a moment and I saw his sexy bearded face and a little precum on his beard. Fuck he looked so hot like that. I pushed my cock back in fucked his face some more. I pulled my cock out of his mouth and leaned down and kissed him. He was such a sexy man and he kissed back. I told him I was going to fuck him. He pulled down his pants revealing a cute jock strap. He straddled himself on the chair. I was expecting for his hole to be full of cum or loose but when I put my finger in his hole I was surprised it was dry. Had he not been fucked tonight I wondered. I spit on my cock his hole because generally that's how I fuck but he pulled out some lube. He put some lube on his hole and I pushed my big uncut cock into his tight ass. And he was tight. I slowly pushed my cock in him. I don't really like to slam it into guys especially if I really like the guy and am turned on. I wanted him to enjoy it. He moaned out and I pushed my cock in slowly and pulled out. He was starting to bottom out..literally. I was enjoying how much his hole was opening up and enjoying fucking him faster. He kept moaning out and I asked him if I liked my fat uncut raw dick. He said he loved it. I started pulling out all the way and pushing it back in. I enjoyed watching my dick go in and out of his hole. I was fucking him longer fuck strokes. I was starting to feel it though I started fucking him faster and started pushing in deeper. I leaned in and kissed him for a moment while I was fucking him. He loved this and it made my dick harder. I decided it was time and pushed my cock all the way in and started rutting his ass with my chest pressed against his back. I was groaning out and shouting as I was breeding him. Fuck his hole was so hot and so was he. He groaned and moaned while he was taking my load. I pumped my dick a few more times and then pulled out. I had the urge to pee really bad after breeding him. He stood up and we both looked at each other. I played with his nipples a little bit and he started moaning out. I took off my shirt and he started playing with my nipples. I thought he'd want to leave after the fuck but he seemed like he wanted to play around some more. He asked if I had another load in me and I said yeah. We looked at each other and started making out. He was an amazing kissed holy fuck. So much passion and his mouth felt so hot against mine. We explored each other's mouth with our tongues and I was moaning while we were making out. We made out from different angles. I asked if he was from here and he said he said. He said it's also his first time here at the bookstore. I was surprised but with his hole dry I believed him. I told him where I was and we kept making out. I asked what he liked and we both liked similar things and also we both enjoyed nipple play. I was glad to hear this so I started sucking his nipples. He was loving me sucking and biting his nipples. For some reason it never dawned on me to even play with his cock because I thought he was a bottom. So I decided to grab his bulge and fuck it was thick and hard. He pulled his underwear down and I felt a beautiful fat curved cock. I love curved cocks. I asked if I can suck him and he said yeah. I started sucking him and damn I could taste so much precum on his cock it tasted so good. He was groaning and moaning out as I was sucking him. I stood up and we kissed some more. I asked if he wanted to fuck me and he said yeah. He said he cums quick and asks if that's a problem. I said it's not a problem at all. I stepped out of my shorts and bent over the little chair. He put some lube on my hole and I felt his cock pushing in. Oh fuck finally. Whether it was right or wrong of me turn down so many chances to get fucked tonight since all 3 guys I played with prior I know they would have fucked me. Or if I should have just put my ass in the air in the dark room earlier in the night like I used to. None of that mattered at this moment. My hole was loosing up and I felt his hot curved cock go in and out of my hole. I was so fucking horny and basically in heat so I could feel my hole open more but I could still feel tightness. Probably because I came earlier as well. I heard him start to groan and moan more as he was fucking me. At one point I was backing my ass on his dick but I also switched to just leaving my ass still and either open my hole more or tightening it. Felt so hot for this hot bearded man to fucking rut my hole with his cock. God I was loving this. I felt him start to tense up and heard him shout and felt his cock thicken. Fuck he was breeding me. I groaned out myself and he stayed in me for a moment before he pulled out. We both got up but to my surprise we did not get dressed. We both started making out again. Damn he was an amazing kisser and we alternated between making out or me sucking his nipples or him sucking mine. I told him I could feel his cum dripping out of my ass and how fucking hot that was. He smiled and we made out some more. While embracing I felt his finger push into my hole. Fuck that was so hot. I could feel his hot finger in my cummy hole. My dick was getting harder and we kept making out while he was fingering. He slapped my ass too. I felt him push another finger in me and I moaned while we were making out. I loved the passion we had making out and the feeling of him fingering my hole feeling the cum slosh around back there felt incredible. We continued to kiss and explore each other's bodies. To my surprise he told me to bend over. He did not have to tell me twice. I bent back over the chair and felt his hard thick curved cock enter my cummy hole. Oh fuck it felt so good. He started fucking me pretty fast and I moaned out. I was backing my ass against his dick and tightening it. He was saying how he loved fucking my ass. He pulled out for a moment and then pushed it back in. I was loving the long fuck strokes he was giving me. He shoved his cock back in and started fucking me faster. I knew he was going to cum again. He started to tense up and yell out and shouted. He bred me a second time. This man was incredible. He pulled out and we faced each other again and kissed each other some more. He was starting to get sweaty. I loved the sweat on his chest and back. My cock was rock hard. I asked him if he wanted to get fucked again and of course he said yes. He bent back down over the chair and I pushed my cock in him. Fuck he was tighter after just cumming and breeding me. I could feel my load in him too. I decided not to pull out all the way with long deep strokes like previously. I just wanted to fuck. I fucked him faster and loved him moaning out and groaning. I did pull out a little more and pushed it back in. I went back to pushing my cock all the way in him and fucking him faster. I decided it was time and fucked him faster and harder until I shot my second load in him. I bred his ass twice. I pulled out and we faced each other again and kissed. We both thanked each other. When we were getting dressed I asked what brought him out to the bookstore tonight. He told me that he went to the leather bar earlier. He said he was horny this evening and decided to get cleaned and prepared and headed out to the bars. He said was originally going out to meet someone tonight and addresses were exchanged but the other guy bailed. He said he went to the leather bar and talked to some guys and potential plans were made but they left and nothing happened. So he decided he wanted to check out the bookstore and see if he can get some action. I laughed and also told him sorry that he went through a rough night. I told him mine was a little bit similar. I decided to do something I normally don't do. There are fun guys I've played with at the book store and some I regretted not getting a chance to play with again. I decided to go for it and asked if he wanted to exchange numbers. He smiled and said definitely. We exchanged numbers and got each other's names. He told me to contact him later. I told him welcome to the bookstore and told him I hope he has fun here. He told me he already has. He kissed one last time having a brief make out session. We both said goodbye and exited the booth. I immediately went to piss because I had to really bad. I could not believe that he got my dick hard after being I was out late and also didn't even nap before going out. I also couldn't believe that I was able to fuck again needing to pee. Releasing my piss felt great. I heard him in the other stall and then heard him leave. I decided to do one last walk around. Technically I did not even do a full walk around when I entered since I went straight for the glory hole booth. There was not a lot of guys around and not any I was interested in. I checked the dark room area for a moment and did not see much going on. I walked near the front and I did see someone at the front lock eyes on me. I did not recognize them but it's almost like they recognized me. Couldn't tell if it was attraction or recognition but they were not familiar to me. I was not necessarily looking for that sexy bear I just played with but I also did not see him. Since I was already near the front I decided to leave. It was an amazing night. From being stood up for weekend plans with someone I was trying to get together with all week to talking to a guy and getting his address and then him changing his mind. I turned what could be a bad night into an amazing night and experience. I got to play with a hot dominant daddy at the bar and even have him lead me around and be of service to him and sucked off his friend. I played with a cute guy in the dark room and got to fool around with him and someone else. I got to play with a hot older leather daddy and be around his leather boots and enjoy servicing his cock and sucking him off to completion and in public. And the best of all playing with that sexy short stocky bearded man and fucking him twice and being bred by him twice with lots of passion and sexual energy. Could not have asked for a better night. I still even this morning am thinking about what that sexy dominant bearded daddy calling me a cum dump. Even though I didn't suck him or get fucked or bred by him or his friends. He seemed to know what I was thinking or know what I am. I still don't know if I am or not anymore. I couldn't refute it when he told me. But I could have easily been fucked by all three guys at the bar or stuck my ass in the air and taking cocks or loads. I don't know if it will eventually happen or not. Until then I'm going to keep enjoying the experiences I have. Swallowed Loads: 2 Loads I dumped: 2 Loads I took: 2 That's some decent math haha. The fact that I am counting loads though might mean that it's just inevitable at some point.

It's a fair view to have. When i was younger I would get upset if I didn't get bred but now I don't really care that much anymore I care more about the experience. I know it can pretty common in public places to not get bred if the guy wants to not cum and fuck others. I've had that happen before too. I guess being grabbed, groped, manhandled, fingered, stretched open and all the passion in between mattered more to me for that experience. He did fuck me again after we took a little break. I was the one who got dressed and had to go as well it's possible that if I stayed longer it would have happened. I wish I had a little more staying power with fucking I cum way too quickly trying to work on that haha.

This happened last night. When I saw the hot daddy bear send me a message and unlock their photos I was so horny and excited. He was verse and we talked a little bit back and forth. We were both horny pigs wanting to fuck love meeting verse guys who have such wild and horny energy. I was so happy when he asked when were going to fuck. We scheduled a time later for the evening. I made sure to prep myself properly and I put on one of my favorite jock straps. I was so excited going over to their place. When he greeted me at the door I realized how much of a bear of a man this daddy was. Huge stocky build and a little bit of stubble where his beard was he must have shaved recently. He immediately grabbed me and we started making out. We were both pressed close together making out and I could feel his hard bulge pressing against me. He pawed my ass with his hands and slapped my ass and grabbed it several times. He told me that we will go the bedroom. I barely got to take my shirt off and he was groping me again and we were making out. He started playing with my nipples and then he turned me over on the bed. I still had my shorts on but he was grinding his bulging cock in his pants against my ass. Fuck I could feel him precumming too. I pulled down my shorts and he admired my jockstrap. He slapped my ass a few times. He turned me over and we made out some more and he took off his clothes. He had a very sexy daddy bear chest. He was so stocky and big it's been a while since i've been with a bear that stocky before I was loving it. I saw his hard cock so I got to my knees and serviced his daddy bear cock. It was so fucking thick and I could taste his precum. He picked me up and put me on the bed and I got on all fours. He got some lube and I felt his daddy bear dick press into my tight hole. Holy fuck it was so damn thick. He wasn't satisfied with just putting it in me. I might have stated before in previous experiences here that getting fucked the top put it all the way in me and fucked me. I did not know what all the way in felt like until this man. Years years ago I met a stocky bear top once who said he liked to fuck like an animal. He would throw me against the wall and every which way and use his weight to push his huge thick cock in me and go all the way deep. This man felt more intense than that and I made sure to clean myself out thoroughly. This daddy bear did not fuck me hard and fast like most tops do. He just pushed in deeper and pulled out. I kept moaning and crying out. He flipped me on my back and said he wants to see my face. He put his thick daddy bear dick back in and continued to push in deeper. I was moaning, crying, and yelling out like a bitch in heat. I was a bitch in heat. He kept saying how he loved my ethnic pussy. He told me what a horny little fucking slut boy I was for his bear daddy dick. I kept telling him how much I love his big fat fucking bear daddy dick. He kept saying that he was going to fuck me deeper and deeper. Every movement he found a way to push deeper in me. Not sure if I was fighting it unintentionally or if he just knew how to maneuver his weight and girth or if it's also that I have not really gotten fucked deep in a very long time. I think it's a little combination of everything but I will not deny this bear had talent. I can't recall how long we fucked for but I kept screaming and moaning out. I haven't felt like such a bitch getting raped by dick in literally years. He kept saying how I'm his little bitch ethnic boy. He said how I'm taking his bear daddy dick and how much he's stretching my hole. I told him to keep tearing my hole open and rape my pussy. He started fucking me faster and I could feel how deep he was. It was getting to a point where I could barely feel the pain because my ass was going numb but my dick was rock hard. I felt like he was going to cum but he stopped suddenly. He said he wanted to hold his seed and not breed me yet. We layed down again and made out some more. My cock was rock hard and leaking. I asked if I could breed his sexy bear ass. He just winked at me and smiled and said yeah. He turned over laying flat on the bed with his ass sticking out. Fuck he had such a hot round ass very bubbly and hairy. Fuck I was so turned on I started rimming him a little which I normally don't do. He was moaning and I stopped and spit on my cock and lubed it up and spit on his hole. I pushed my cock in slowly. Fuck his hole felt so fucking warm and wet. Not sure if he lubed up or got fucked before but I didn't care. I did the opposite of daddy bear and did not push in all the way. I just pushed in slowly and pulled out a little more. I kept doing this but a little faster. My cock was getting harder and precumming more. I told him I love fucking his hot bear daddy ass. I said how he's such a fucking sexy hot daddy bear with a hot ass. I started fucking him deep and faster. He was moaning out loving it. I started pulling out all the way again and shoving it back in. I couldn't hold it any longer. I shoved my cock all the way back in the daddy bear hole and started fucking him faster and deeper. I told him I'm going to breed his fucking hot bear daddy hole. I shouted and shot a huge load in his ass. Fuck his ass was so damn good I was in heaven. I stayed in him for a little bit making sure to drain my load completely. I pulled out and saw a little bit of cum leaking out of his hole. So fucking hot I should have taken a picture I'm sure he would have liked that. I pushed my semi hard cock back in pushing my boy load deeper into the hot daddy bear. After that we layed down for a little bit and talked. We shared some stories and experiences while caressing each other. I told him a bit of the fun I used to have in the past years ago and how much of a whore I was and how fun it was. He said he was also the same and still kinda is. It felt really freeing and fun to be able to openly discuss past experiences and even some current experiences with someone. He even gave me some pointers and told me of some things I didn't know. He got hard again talking about all this and so did I. He said he was going to fuck his sexy hot boy again and take my hole. He put me on my back again and shoved his bear daddy dick deeper in me. Fuck I still shouted out and cried like a bitch. I could slowly start to feel my hole get a little looser. This daddy bear was fucking stretching my hole open and deeper more then I thought was possible. He decided to flip me over and got on top of me. He took control of my legs so I had no support and had no choice but take all of his bear daddy dick. Fuck I was still shouting and crying out but I was starting to feel my hole open up some more but I still shouted every time he found a way to go deeper. He said he was getting close to cumming and he pulled out. He slapped my ass and said what a hot sexy boy I am. He said he's saving his daddy bear load for the next visit. He said my ass was virginal tight. It made sense even though I did get fucked semi recently I get tight pretty quickly but also I haven't been deep power fucked by randoms. What a power move but I absolutely loved and respected it. We made out a little bit more and then I got dressed and went on my way. My hole did still feel pretty stretched. And when pushing out there was still precum maybe some cum back there. Maybe I can't count getting bred by the daddy bear as a load count. But I did breed the hot daddy bear myself. And I will see him again.

Welp it's been over a week I think and I've been so damn horny. Unfortunately I have not had the chance or opportunity to get any action until tonight. I kinda looked online but there was not really anyone on. So I went to my old reliable. I went to park at the book store and noticed the security guard was pretty cute. I had flashbacks to when I fooled around with a security guard at a place like this in another state and another time. Might as well have been another lifetime ago. The parking lot was pretty packed at least so I felt kinda good. There seemed to be less guys then usual despite the parking. I walked around a little bit and a white bearded daddy caught my eye. We both kinda glanced at each other but nothing more. When I went to the dark room area I saw him. He was just kinda standing there so I stood a little bit away from him but grabbed my crotch. He grabbed his and I took this as a sign. I felt his cock through his shorts and he grabbed my bulge. He started stroking my cock through my shorts and I reached into his shorts and felt his. He had a really thick cock. I pulled my shorts down to reveal my underwear with a jockstrap like pouch and the ass is exposed and centered. He enjoyed playing with my cock. I played with his nipples a little bit and he was loving it. He leaned in and kissed me. He was a pretty good kisser. He even licked my ear and nuzzled it. I asked what he liked to do and he told me that's a loaded question. He seemed content just stroking cocks so I left it at that. I sucked on his nipples a little bit and heard him groaning. His cock felt bigger and I could feel precum. I asked if he wanted to go in a room but he said he was good. We made out a little bit more and then he said thanks and kissed me and walked away. Hmm maybe he was bi/closeted or married who knows. I decided to walk around some more. One of the glory hole booths was broken somehow but it's a shame it was the one that I generally get a good amount of action in. It didn't seem like there was that many people there still with exception of the white bearded daddy. He looked my way several times when I passed him by a few times and smiled but he never said anything. I was starting to think this might be a bust and time to leave. I saw a few new guys walk in. One specifically stood out a guy in all black with black leather boots and a cute black beard and a hat. He also had a bag too. I walked passed him and he looked at me. He didn't fully acknowledge but he didn't deny or dismiss it he seemed pre-occupied. I saw him stand in front of a door and was going to try my luck but I decided to circle first. And when I did this the door was closed. I decided to go check out a booth. I saw an older guy in a booth with a huge thick cock jacking it off. I got on my knees and started fucking my face. His cock was nice and thick and I was enjoying him pull all the way out and push his cock all the way back. He stepped back with his hard on and did not say a word. I decided to go for it and dropped my shorts to reveal my ass exposed jock strap like underwear and pushed it against the glory hole. I felt his fat cock push against my hole. Fuck it was big but he did not push all the way inside he just pushed In a little and pulled out. He was fucking me with longer rhythm movements. It was feeling really good and I heard him groaning. But then all of a sudden he pulled out. He sat back on the chair with his hard cock out. Maybe he didn't want to cum yet. I walked around some more. I found the black dressed bearded man in the dark room area. I was a little bit nervous but I decided to grab my crotch. He looked at me and grabbed my crotch and smiled. I was getting hard pretty fast. He started playing my cock and I felt his and it was covered in lube he was probably fucking someone but it was rock hard. He kept looking at me when he was playing with my cock. Someone else came up and started playing with his ass. He seemed to be enjoying a mix of his ass played with and stroking my cock. He grabbed my shoulder and then walked out of the dark room. I walked out of the dark area and saw he was by an open room. Before I could even attempt to enter the room the guy who was playing with his ass rushed passed me and went into the room with him before me and closed the door and locked it. Well damn. I decided to walk around a little more. I was trying to see if there was anyone else around but still slim pickings. After walking around some more I went back to the dark area. I saw he was back there again. I started grabbing his cock and he grabbed mine. This time before we could do much foreplay he told me to follow him. I followed him out of the dark area and we both got a room. I got a good look at him now and he got a good look at me. He looked kinda younger but had a nice beard and him being dressed in all black and having a leather bag on him gave him the aura of a leather man. And I I would discover that he very much had that trait. He looked at me and told me how cute and sexy I am. He grabbed my cock and started kissing me. He did lighter kisses more with the tongue then the mouth but I responded with my tongue. He told me I was a good boy. I dropped my shorts and he pulled my cock out completely. It was getting hard and leaking fast. I felt his cock it was no longer wet with lube and a little softer. I stroked his cock and he told me he wants me to cum for him. he told me "Be a good boy and cum for daddy right here and now". Oh fuck I have not really done that before. I generally don't like to waste cum but he was cute and sexy and he was making me hard and wet. The more he kissed me the more my cock grew until It was rock hard. I could feel more precum coming out. Oh fuck he was actually going to make me cum. I told him I'll be a good boy for daddy and shouted that fuck I'm coming. He aimed my cock and I shot my load all over the floor. Holy shit it was intense and hot under his direction it did not feel like a waste. He asked me afterwards what I like. I told him i'm pretty versatile and he said he is as well. I can definitely believe that. He told me he wanted me to keep stroking his cock. We kept making out and his cock got bigger and grew harder. I could feel my own cock grow again. He kept playing with my cock while I was playing with his telling me what a good boy I am. Once his cock was rock hard he ordered me to get on my knees. I did and felt how hard and thick his cock was. Fuck when he pushed in I yelped and cried out. It slipped past the ring fortunately and fucking hurt. Instinctively I backed away a little from his cock and he pulled out for a moment. He told me I was really tight and asked if I had any loads in me. I said no and he said we'll change that. He sat down on the bench and I set next to him. I stroked his cock and made out with him some more. He told me he wanted to fuck and breed me. He said he wants to fuck my boy hole. I told him "Please fuck your fuckhole Sir." He responded that it's his hole and he wanted to fuck his fuckhole and cumhole and make it his. I felt my cock getting harder again and precumming while he was telling me this. He told me to straddle and sit on his cock and ride it. I hovered my asshole over his cock and pressed down onto his cock. Fuck it felt big but I took a deep breathe and took it all. I love riding cocks like that. I started riding him and he encouraged me telling me to ride daddy's dick and that he was going to breed his hole. I kept riding him and tightening my hole at the same time. I did not hear him shout or yell but I felt my hole fill up. Fuck. I still milked his cock while riding it until he got soft and his dock plopped out. He thanked me and said I was a good boy. He asked me earlier if I have any kinks and I said yeah I and he told he has several. I was about to find out what he meant. I was expecting just a thanks boy and he'd leave the room. He kissed me and pushed me against the wall. He started squeezing my nipples and sucking on them. Then he started biting on them. Then he was biting on my chest and stomach. Oh fuck I was not expecting this but it was making me hard. With no warning he grabbed my hand and pushed it to the wall forcefully and held my hand restrained. With his other hand he was playing with my cock. Then he grabbed my other hand and pushed it against the wall. I was memorized and caught off guard. He started kissing me more. He bit my nipples some more while my hands were restrained. He told me i'm a fucking hot boy. Then he pulled me in and we kissed some more. He said I was a cute and sexy boy. He said I got his first load of the night. I got dressed and he thanked me and said goodbye. I decided that I was pretty much done and got what I needed. Got a bit of intimacy and rough play and got to suck some cock and got fucked and bred. I call that a success. I walked around one last time after he left and saw the white bearded daddy sitting down. I smiled and looked at him and he smiled back. I rubbed his shoulder for a moment and said thank you and left. It may have just been one load but it was an intense and passionate fuck and left me happy. I have no idea how I always run into leather daddies in these places. It's like I'm a magnet to them. But it's always a great experience when I do. Until next time. 1 Load in my Hole and 1 Load on the Floor.

Oh no I definitely agree with that. I wrote this all when I got back late last night so I might have misinterpreted my own thoughts lol. I used to feel like that years ago but not anymore. But it's not just about feeling empowered I get really horny if I don't have sex at least once a week. I know first world problems. But my cock is always leaky when I'm really horny and I don't really jack off that much anymore. Used to spend too many hours doing it. It's all about what I give and get from the experiences at a book store or place. Maybe sex with one guy will satisfy me if it's satisfying enough or just the mood I'm in. Or maybe it will take multiple guys. I also still like to be subservient and probably a little too much but guys definitely pick up on it. There was several events going on this past weekend too so the bookstore was an easier out for me but effective. I'm not quite sure if I'm ready for events like cumunion. I feel you have to either get there really early before most guys show up or you have to really be willing to put yourself out there and available for anyone and everyone to use. Which I mean I know is the point but the professionals out there know what they are doing at these events and even some tops or sirs seem to navigate and assist the one their with. It's really kinda fascinating. But something I'm not ready for at the moment.

Ah it's been a while since I posted here. But also been a while since I have really kinda had sex. I did a few weeks ago head out to the bars, baths, and bookstore and it was not good. Was not in the right mindset for any of it but ended up fucking and breeding someone at the bookstore. And after that encounter I did spend time and fuck and breed someone I like. But it's been a hectic week and i'm still sort of trying to deal with shit from the past but made good progress this week. I was beyond frustrated especially sexually frustrated. There were several events going on this week and I thought of heading to the bars or baths. But did not want a repeat of the last experience. Also someone recently told me that going to the baths and bookstores can be empowering. You can feel confidence and feel sexy and have fun doing it I definitely agree with that even though it's situational. Alright now time to the stuff people actually care to read about the sex and loads and whatnot. So I decided to go on an app before I went out. I sort of looked on there a little before I actually headed to where I was going. I saw an older daddy top post that they were looking for a bottom to fuck. Well I mean it's been a while since i've crafted a message to send to a guy let alone a top but I did alright apparently. While we were talking back and forth I went to the bookstore. I was happy to learn that I can cum and go from the bookstore as well quite literally. The parking lot was packed so I was excited as well. I saw several cute guys walking around. I went into a booth and an older daddy went into the booth. I crouched on the ground and saw his face and his cock released from his pants. The cock was pretty huge and thick but it also looked wet. He started putting his finger in my mouth and of course I sucked his finger. Once he was done with foreplay he let me suck his cock. It was really slimy I wondered if either he fucked someone or if there was a certain lube on it. After sucking him for a while and listening to him moan and felt his cock thrusting in and out of my mouth. He pulled away and asked me to come into the booth. I happily obliged. I went in and started sucking him even more and playing with his nipples. He took his cock out of my mouth and commanded me to lick and suck his balls. I always love exploring every part of a guy so I happy licked and sucked his balls. He started jacking his cock furiously. I tried to to go back to his cock but he grabbed my head and pushed me down on his balls. I was loving licking and sucking his balls and moaning. I heard him start to grunt and breathe heavier and he pulled me off his balls and shoved me back on his cock. I took his cock all the way and felt the hot cum slide down my throat. Oh it tasted good and it was a large amount. He thanked me and pulled up his pants and left. I checked my messages after and got another response from the app hook up daddy. It was still being planned so I walked around a little bit more and spit the cum out in the bathroom. It felt like my throat was numb and my mouth so he must have had numbing lube on his cock. I walked around some more after that and saw another grey daddy but this one had a hat on. I went into a booth and he went into the other one. He had a nice uncut cock. It was soft at first but it got hard pretty fast. He kept pulling all the way out and shoving his cock all the way down my throat. It was fucking hot and I didn't even hear him make a sound when he blew his load down my throat. Another tasty load. That's probably 2 anyone is keeping track. I walked around some more. After some more back and forth with hook up daddy it was determined that I would go to his place and get fucked and bred. He even sent me a few videos of him fucking boys. Damn he really knew how to get a boy excited. I drove to his place and had to follow the instructions for the complex. Once I got inside he opened the door basically naked. He was a hot salt and pepper daddy with a little goatee and nice furry chest. He told me to make myself comfortable. So I stripped down and left my orange jockstrap on. He grabbed me and we started making out. He was a pretty good kisser and I sucked and licked his nipples. I was trying not to rush but he seemed pretty anxious and horny so I made my way to his large curved thick cock. Damn it felt great to suck and take it all the way down my throat. I've been a little nervous with sucking cock lately since I was used to "one" for a high number of years. So getting to suck different cocks and sizes and types is not only fun but can be intimidating sometimes. I was enjoying sucking his cock and having fun. He pulled me up and we made out some more. He then commanded me to get on all fours. I felt lube at my hole and felt his finger go in my tight hole. He tossed me some poppers and I immediately took a hit knowing I was tight and he was big. I tried my best to take his hard raw daddy dick but fuck it did hurt a little bit. Fortunately he was patient and took it out a little bit and then slowly pushed it back in. I took another hit of poppers and felt his cock go all the way in me. Ugh fuck I can still remember it. I started to back myself up on his dick but he told me to let him do the work. So I tried to open my hole as much as I could and let him take control. Fuck it felt so good I was moaning and groaning and felt him pulling all the way out and pushing it back in. He was starting to grunt and I knew he wouldn't last long. He got on top of me and fuck I felt him go deeper in me. He started pile driving me and then he shouted out and I felt his huge load flood my hole. I clenched my hole a few times and backed my ass on his cock a little more as he was coming. He seemed to love that. He then pulled out completely and thanked me. He said he hasn't cum in around two weeks so it was a huge load. We got dressed and he said to come back when I need to get bred again. I told him I will and I meant it. He said he'll sleep great tonight now. I left but my night was not over. In the past years I'd get a great fuck but that was it. I sometimes wanted more but had to be content with the fact that it was all I was getting. I know I used to be very whoreish cumslut like in the past years ago. Regardless of the reasons I decided to go back to the bookstore. I figured it would still be packed and I wanted to have some more fun whether it was more loads or not. When I got back there I got lucky and got a spot. There was a cute silver bearded daddy sitting in his car. I tried to see if he was interesting but he was on his phone. Damn would have been fun to suck him in the car lol. Another time perhaps. I went back inside and was happy I didn't have to pay again. I walked around and saw some of the same guys but also some new guys. I went into one of the booths and saw a bearded daddy through the glory hole. He looked at me grinned and took his cock out. He had a smaller cock but it was pretty thick. I was really enjoying sucking on it and he had a lot of precum. I sucked him and he invited me into his booth. I sucked on his nipples some and he played with mine. I crouched down again and sucked him off. He shot his load in me it was a smaller load but I enjoyed it. We thanked each out and I exited the booth. I walked around some more and and saw a really cute guy with stubble hair couldn't quite tell his age but definitely older. He sort of looked at me. I decided I need to piss and after pissing I walked back into a booth. I crouched down and saw that it was him. He took out a huge curved thick cock. I immediately started sucking him. I was feeling confident in my oral skills tonight and he moaning and saying how good it felt when I sucked him. He then pulled away and asked to see my dick. Of course I said okay and pulled down my pants and went down to my jockstrap. I took my cock out and stuck it through the whole. I was semi hard but once he took his cock in my mouth I got hard pretty fast. Damn he had a hot mouth. I don't get sucked much but it felt really good. I was fucking his face a little too. He pulled away and I heard him speak. I crouched down and he asked what I like. I told him I am pretty much versatile. I figured with him i'd be anyways. He said he is and suggested we got a private booth. We both left the booth and found a private one. He had a cute face and we sort of felt each others body's and played with each other nipples through the shirts. Then he leaned down and I leaned in to kiss him. He was a very good kisser. Very passionate and I could feel his passion in each kiss and motion. It felt really good. We explored each other's body for a little bit and then I sucked on his nipples. I decided to take off my shirt and he took off his. After we both sucked each other's nipples I went down to his crotch. He pulled his pants down and I sucked on his hard cock again. Fuck it felt so good and much easier to suck him then it was in the glory hole. He told me he's normally a top but he is bottoming more lately. He said I had a nice ass though. I asked if he wanted to fuck me and he said yes. I never pushed out the huge load from the older daddy app hook up. He pulled out a little lube and put some on his cock and my hole. Damn when his cock pushed into my hole it felt so good. I felt the curve and I felt the load from before help to guide his cock all the way into my ass. He started fucking me and it felt so good. I was started to cry out because he was by far the biggest i'd taken that night and he was also pushing the previous load deeper. He started pulling all the way out and pushing in me. I felt the tip of his dick pull out so close to my hole entrance without pulling out. Fuck it felt so good. I was loving how passionate he was fucking me and then he pulled out and said it's his turn to get fucked. I was more then happy to fuck him. He was way tighter then I thought he would be. I used some spit but my cock foreskin was pulling back when fucking him. Damn he felt so good. I did some of what he was doing by pulling all the way out and back in. He moaning and groaning and loving it. I saw a hot ass in a booth earlier in a jockstrap. I thought about fucking them but I don't fuck much and have decided when I do fuck I want it to be someone I want to fuck not just a random hole at least for now. He asked me to breed him and I was already getting close. I felt my cock tighten up and felt my week load unload in his hot ass. Damn this guy is tropy he's cute and sexy and has a nice thick curved dick and he's great at being actually versatile. After breeding him and pulled out he thanked me. We both got dressed and he started asking some questions like if i'm around here and I said I am. No numbers or contact info was exchanged I generally don't do that at these kinda places. We said we'll see each other around. I decided I wouldn't empty any of the loads in me and haven't so far and just kept them in me. He didn't breed me but I felt a lot of precum back there. I walked around and went back to my favorite booth lol. A cute guy with a nice black goatee walked in. He said hell yeah and pulled out his cock. It was soft but I could tell it would get bigger. It was so fun feeling it grow while I was sucking him. I was enjoying it and I know he was when I heard a ping notification. I acted like I saw a ghost and immediately pulled off and pulled my pants up. I looked at my phone to see if there was any notifications. I was dreading texts or calls even though I knew it was impossible but nothing is really impossible. I was surprised to not find any texts or calls. I looked back in the glory hole and the guy was gone. When I left the booth I didn't see him. Damn paranoia but slightly justified. I walked around some more and did a walk rotation. It seems like guys were kinda clearing out or just not really anyone new. I went back to the booth and an older daddy with a white goatee walked in the other booth when I entered. He looked a little cautious at first but when he was me crouched down he smiled and pulled out his cock. Another uncut cock and it was soft. I started sucking on him and tasting his precum as his cock started to grow. I was having enjoying sucking him and he was starting to fuck my face. He pushed his cock all the way down my throat and started fucking me from that angle. Damn it felt so good and I heard him shout and felt his load go down my throat. Another load sucked yum. He thanked me and I left the booth. I walked around some more and was starting to wind down myself. I saw the cute stubble versatile guy. I smiled at him and lightly brushed my hand over his shirt and chest. He smiled back and grinned. I walked around some more and saw him standing at a booth. I went in the other one and in no time started sucking his dick again. He was nice and hard again and I was loving his thick curved cock. This time I suggested we go get a private room. We went back to making out and back to some passion. After I started sucking his dick I asked if he wanted to fuck me again. He said yes and I assumed the position in the booth and felt his cock at my hole again. Ugh it felt so damn good. I was back to crying and moaning like a bookstore whore. I was losing a little bit of momentum when fucked me but I loved when pulled all the way in and out. I was trying to bite down on my shirt to muffle my groans and cries a little. I felt him really start to pound me and he him shout and spasm. He then stayed in me and I continued to milk his cock with my ass. He pulled and said thanks. I asked when he last came and he said yesterday. I told him it's been roughly a week for me but that the load I gave him was well needed. There was no talk of or hint of trying to get together again. This time we just got dressed and kissed one more time. We said we'd see each other and I told him I was done for the night. This was such a great and fun night. I still think the first post I did here about being nervous at the bath house and having more confidence at the book store was still fun. But I wasn't fully in the right place or head space at that time. Even though there were fun and hot sexy guys I was too hesitant. I felt very empowered tonight and had a lot of fun. I think I made the right call. I've pretty much resolved and let go of the past. And while I do have someone that I do care about a lot and that I'm seeing they don't seem to concerned if I fool around. We also aren't serious or anything right now. But it feels so empowering and free to be able to fuck and get fucked without worrying about someone checking up on me constantly or harassing me or having to worry about guilt. I haven't felt this free in a long time. I still don't know if I'll go back to being a cumdump. But I didn't feel the need to be one tonight I had fun. I will probably do this more frequently maybe once or twice a week. Very very different of how frequent I used to visit these places years ago. Again, sorry for all the fluff in between hope someone enjoyed this. Oh right and load count. Loads Swallowed: 4 Loads Taken up The Ass/Being Bred: 1 Loads Given Up the Ass/Bred: 1

Well damn been years since I've been to one of these. After going to the bath house and then the book store the other day. I kinda felt that maybe I was ready to get back into this. But a lot of questions were in my mind of if i'd return to my cumslut ways or what would happen. The truth is I was not ready for this but I went anyway. This also happened a few nights ago but finally decided to write about it tonight. It was very packed when I got there. I was really nervous when checking in but I got the pass and walked in. It's been years since I last visited this place and so much about it changed. So many corridors and I saw a familiar dark room which I used to visit. Lots of good and times that happened there. The booths changed completely but I found a few in the back. I didn't even realize at first they had a few steps you could go up so someone could put their dick through the glory hole. Reminded me of another certain place from the past. I also found a dark area with a few booths of rooms with glory holes. This looked very familiar to a certain club that's no longer around even the lighting. I almost forgot there was an upstairs so I went up the stairs. I saw familiar rooms with red doors. It looked somewhat similar from what I remembered and memories of the smell and past came flooding to me. Had some really fun times in the past. But I noticed it was empty. I saw another set of stairs behind some darkened areas. I don't remember this previously. But also these extra stairs reminded me of another place that is no longer around. Walking up the stairs I heard loud music. And when I got to the top the room was darker and it looked like a DJ in the back. And I saw lots of guys and guys bent over on benches assuming the position. Wow. I was only wearing a black t-shirt and a jockstrap underneath my shorts and some boots. Since it's been forever since I've done all this I also cleaned myself out which I haven't done in years. I walked a little more and found an area with crosses and slings and typical sex dungeon type stuff. I saw a few leather guys and guys in jock straps standing around. Also what seemed to be clothed men likely tops who were there to help their help their boys or maybe just bottoms I wasn't sure. Or maybe they were to recruit guys to fuck them. I also found a pitch black dark room that a lot of guys were in. Oh yeah this was bringing me back. Before getting into anything I left that area and saw a locker. I figured that I should get a locker. There was a wait but I was able to get one. I was a little intimidated because there were so many guys in jockstraps and leather and they seemed like professionals. I was just a man that used to be a boy years ago in these kinds of places and I knew I was probably out of touch. Regardless I decided to strip my clothes and just wear my jockstrap and boots. I had a little bit of a hard time trying to cruise guys. There were so many guys and so many in jockstraps or guys who were bent over and waiting to serve men. These were professionals and maybe in the past I was one of them or a fraction of them. After walking around for a little bit I knew pretty quickly I was out of my depth. The bath house was more of a cruising dance. I did not quite perfect it but I got better at it along the way. The bookstore was smaller and fortunately I had a lot of charisma that day. This was a huge place with so many different corridors and floors. After not having so much luck cruising I decided to go into the dark room. Darkness has always been my friend at these kinds of places. I've always had infamous times in the dark rooms. I was nervous in a sea of bodies. I quickly felt someone grab my ass. And before I knew it I was up against a guy. He seemed like he had some really nice nipples and he started sucking my nipples and nuzzling me. This was a little more my speed. While the guy was rubbing all over me another guy was rubbing my ass stroking my hole. I started making out with the guy who was on me and he was a nice and passionate kisser. Before I knew It I felt a cock head at my hole. Oh fuck here it was. I was really nervous and tight. But I knew I was clean at least. The guy tried to shove his cock into me and the other guy was holding me. I got nervous and stumbled a little I wonder how the others perceived me. I told the guy I was sorry that I haven't done this in a while. The guy was determined and got part of his raw cockhead in my hole. I unfortunately stumbled around again and he slipped out and gave up. I decided I need to catch my breath. I went back to the lockers for a moment. I saw lots of cute guys by the lockers but was trying to focus. A million thoughts racing through my mind. I was scared and nervous but also anxious and horny. I decided to go back to the dark room. No idea if it was the same guy or someone else but another guy was fingering my hole. Another guy was stroking his cock so I lightly touched him and he touched me. I decided to start sucking on his nipples and he seemed to like it. While I was sucking his cock I felt a cock at my hole again. Oh fuck here it is. I still had some saliva or maybe lube back there. The guy had a decent size cock and it started to push past the ring and into my tight clean hole. I moaned out in pleasure because it felt good. I started sucking the guy in front of me even more. Both guys were loving spit roasting me and I was nervous and hesitant but I was enjoying it but also a little reserved. I think they knew that so the guy fucking me pulled me off the guy I was sucking and pushed me against the wall and a bench. Now he was really starting to fuck me. Fuck I was getting barebacked in a dark room by someone I couldn't even see. I heard him moaning more and I was moaning and crying out in pleasure. I still feel like there was a little bit of defiance or hesitation in my rhythm but the man didn't care he kept fucking me and started fucking me harder. Before I knew it I heard him shout and I was moaning and yelling as I started to feel my ass filled with cum. Fuck I was getting bred. He shouted some more and pumped me a few more times and then pulled out. Ugh my hole felt so wet but I had so many mixed feelings in my head. I regained my composure and got past the sea of mean and went back to my locker. What happened next changed the night and the rest of the next few days to come. I opened my locker to look at my phone and saw a call from my ex. We had just broken up recently but decided that we will both do our own thing in life and he wished me the best and told me to go do what I want. The first call and voicemail was kinda more inquiring. The next few calls and texts made my heart sink. He said that someone he knew saw me there and he called me all kinds of names and slurs. My chest dropped and I didn't know what to do or think. I put my phone back in the locker.. God dammit. My mind was filled with frustration and guilt. I was monogamous with him for so many plus years never cheated in relationship. He told me to go have fun and live my life. I didn't necessarily come to the event to be a cum dump. I didn't really know what I was looking for. Was I looking for sex, a friend, a potential interest, romance, or affection? Or was I really there just to take whatever I can get and as much as I want. I figured well what's done is done. It did not matter what I did from that point on in the night. No matter how much more cock or loads I take or give i'll be labelled as a whore, slut, cumdump my fate was sealed. But I didn't care at that point. I went back into the dark room. I ran into a sexy older daddy. He grabbed my cock and started playing with it. Someone else grabbed my ass again. Oh fuck here we go again. The sexy daddy was jacking me off while the other man with a huge cock was pushing into my hole. He was a lot bigger then the other guy. I felt my hole start to strain a little taking his huge raw cock. I cried out when pushed into me and heard him groan. The sexy daddy was playing with my body while the man behind me was fucking me. Damn it felt good but at the same time I felt sad and guilty. I tried to push the feelings away but I think some hesitation did overcome me. It didn't matter the man was enjoying my hole and I heard him grunt and I felt a huge load in me. Looks like load number two. I felt over the sexy daddies body and thought about doing more. But I felt guilty after taking a second load. I decided to go the bathroom and push the cum out. Fortunately I was still clean I was sort of proud at how good I did with the prep beforehand. But I felt some shame pushing two loads out. I went back to the open area where the bottoms were bent over the benches. I tried my best to cruise but I think I was somewhat mentally broken from the texts and calls that haunted me. I decided there was no way I could cruise openly so I went back to the dark room. This time no one was groping me. So I saw someone or silhouettes of a larger stocky man. I felt his body a little bit and then felt his cock. It was thick and girthy. He seemed to be approve and then he kissed me. I kissed him back and we both started making out. I started kissing his chest and he kissed my face. He sucked on my nipple for a little bit and I sucked on his. I started exploring more of his chest and before I knew it I was on my knees. I started sucking him and he was already getting harder. God it felt so good to be sucking cock again. I really enjoyed my lips going up and down on his cock. I started swirling my tounge around his cock and he moaned more. Another man started getting near us and he looked cute. I groped his chest and he groped mine. He started groping the daddy I was sucking too. I then heard them both make out above me and it turned me on even more. The other guys started grabbing my head as I was sucking the stocky daddy. He grabbed my hair for a moment and I started sucking his cock. Damn his cock was huge. While I was sucking his cock the other stocky daddy was rubbing my hole and playing with it. I got up and started licking the man's nipples and kissing his neck. The man took this as a cue and started kissing me. While we were making out the stocky daddy's cock was pressing at my hole. Fuck here we go again. In no time at all I felt his cock push into me. Fuck it felt so good. The guilt and sadness was starting to melt away. The visual image and scent of these two hot daddies surrounding me, making out, and sucking them both off in intervals was driving me so damn horny. They both encouraged each other and I was started to hold onto the other guy as the stocky daddy was fucking me. I heard him start to tense up and fuck me harder. I was really holding onto the other guy for stability and I felt my hole flood again with another man's cum. It was feeling less guilty and more like pleasure. The guy who I was holding on started stroking his cock furiously. The stocky daddy grabbed me and we started making out again. Before I knew it I felt ropes of cum on my leg and thigh. The man was jacking off and cumming on both of us. Fuck that was so hot. We all sort of groped each other one last time then a simple pat before they disappeared and I left the dark area. I decided to go back to my phone to check the time. More text and calls and some that were very personal things that again made my chest sink and filled me with guilt and panic. There was nothing I could do at this point to make it any better. I figured I guess I'm a sinner and might as well continue the night. I tried to cruise around a little more but still just was not in the head space. I decided to go back to the dark area and it wasn't as crowded now. But that didn't stop someone from grabbing my dick. My dick was getting hard and they felt like they had a nice furry body. They then bent over and I saw their ass in a jockstrap. I doc like topping sometimes but the mixed feelings I was in. I wasn't really in the right space. I then felt someone grab my ass and they started grabbing my body. They pushed me against a wall and I felt a HUGE cock push against my hole. Oh fuck I wasn't sure if I was ready for this but it didn't really matter. They slammed their cock in my ass and I yelped out. I tried hard to keep balance and also try to open up my hole as much as I could. They were fucking me rough and aggressive and normally I do like that but right now I was kinda mixed. I was trying to pull away but they wouldn't let me. They grabbed me and held me and I felt their cock get bigger. I started really moaning and shouting out and I heard them yell really loud when I felt another huge load flood my hole. I moaned and groaned and sighed as they pulled their wet cock out of me and left the room. Fuck. Although it did feel good the texts and calls I kept checking between had me kind of checked out. I decided to head back to the locker. More and more awaited me. Not only that but I kept getting called. I didn't answer a single one. And I also decided that I guess this is the end of my night. I was originally going to also go to a bar afterwards and kinda check it out and maybe dance and then head back to the event after. But after everything I read I decided I guess I'll just go home. I got dressed and went down the stairs. I did go past the darkly lit area with the glory holes. I saw maybe one or two people but decided not to. I went back to the area where it looked like the original glory hole booths the place used to have. But there was now a platform for guys to go above. When walking that way that's when I saw him. It looked like a semi older man dressed in all black with some piercings and a huge bushy beard. His eyes also looked intense and I locked onto his and he locked onto mine. I thought there's no way he'd be into me . So I walked past him but he also walked behind me. I thought maybe I was imagining this and when I went towards the platform I thought he was going into a room but he walked back to where he was sitting. I walked past him again and figured he'd get up and leave but he didn't. So I sat down not next to him but somewhat near him where he could see me. I looked for any indication but he was on his phone. I decided to grope myself and then he looked over. I then decided to go for it and sat next to him. He looked at me and I gently touched his chest. His shirt was soaked in sweat. But he let me and he looked at me. The spark was initiated. I slowly started rubbing his body and he started groping mine. He had an intensity to him. And I looked at him nervous and slightly scared but I decided to start sucking his nipples through his shirt. I heard in a deep voice "yeah boy". To my surprise I felt piercings on the nipples. Huge ones. He lifted his shirt and I saw and felt sweat and hair on his chest. His nipples intimidated me for a moment but I took the plunge and took them in my mouth. These were huge ring nipples so I wasn't entirely sure how to do this but he encouraged me. I was sucking on his nipple and his piercing at the same time. I was gently sucking away when I heard "harder boy". He liked it rough? Okay that's what I like so I started sucking on them harder. To my surprise I heard him say "Harder boy". He then showed me I can grab and twist his nipples which I did. I then looked up at him and nervously had a sense of yearning and affection when looking at him. He must have seen it too so we both leaned in and started kissing. His tounge exploring my mouth and mine exploring his. I was moaning and he was moaning. We broke away for a moment and I still saw the intensity in his eyes. I started kissing his face and his cheek and he started moaning even more. Then I went for it and started licking his face. He seemed to really like this and said "good boy:. I licked his face more intensely and licked the other side as well. He then kissed me but this time he held my mouth and started blowing into my mouth and held my nose. What..was this? He was pushing air into my mouth and I was feeling light headed. My arms and legs started to grow weak and I felt like I was going to collapse soon. He then broke away and kissed me again and said "Good boy". Was that breathe play through kissing? Wow what an intense man. He did this a few more times and he started also slightly punching my chest. He told me to hold it and stay still which I did. He started giving me slight orders and my natural submissive instincts kicked in. He would compliment me as a good boy after I performed well for him. After that we made out some more. I decided to speak and asked "Sir do you want to go to a room perhaps". He smiled and me and said "Sure boy". He put his sweaty shirt back on and we both went upstairs and found a room. It wasn't completely private but it was somewhat enclosed. He lifted my body up and started kissing me again. He was strong and I was putty in his hands. He did some more breath play and also twisted my nipples harder. He put me on the bed like area and we lay next to each other making out and exploring each other's bodies. He flipped me over and started playing my ass and groping it. I was moaning out in pleasure. He then started spanking my ass. It's been years since I really had my ass spanked but my instincts remembered some of it like to push my ass out and not pull back. I did hesitantly a few times almost pull back but I also anticipated his hand. I yelled out when he spanked me it hurt but wasn't too bad but the pain felt kind of good. I thought I had his rhythm figured out but then he started spanking both my ass cheeks back and forth and I started yelling out unable to predict his next move. He then put me on my back and started playing with my cock. I was hard and my cock was dripping. To my surprise he started sucking my cock. And damn he was good at it. I was enjoying and loving every moment of it. He pulled me up and we started making out some more and he did more breathe play, more nipple play, and a little more punching. Some in my stomach and some in my rib area. He said I have great energy and that I'm a very good boy. He said I respond so naturally with his direction and that it flows. We also embraced a few times and I was able to really hold him tight and release the stress, pain, guilt, anger, and shame I was feeling from earlier In the night. I think he could sense this. He asked me a few times if everything was okay and I just smiled and said yes. It was getting near the end of the night and they were starting to close up. To my surprise he asked if I wanted to go his place. I was so nervous, happy, excited, sad, and felt guilt, and also horny at the same time. He said I didn't have to if I don't want to. But I just smiled at him and said yes. We kissed again and we both left together. But that's a story for another time. I will say that since that night I haven't really been kept awake horny and trying to jack off or edge myself. I also haven't felt the need to cruise guys or porn online. I'm not sure if it was the communion event or the man I met at the end of the night and stayed the night with. But I think I got a sense of satisfaction and maybe found what I was looking for that night. Whether what I was looking for was to be a whore, cumdump, or find someone to be intimate with and even go home with. In a sense I did a little bit of everything that night and so much more. And I don't know the answer to if I am a whore or cum dump again. But I guess i'm still exploring myself right now. Who knows what the "next" load will be. Oh right and load count at the event was 4 guys that bred me lol.

For fucks sake this is going to be really long. If you don't like reading a lot or get annoyed by lengthy ranting and inner dialogue or reflection this might not be the post to read. If you care more about load counts and stuff then skip to the Load Count and Stuff. I also tried to organize this in parts with bold and underlined text if that helps. Whelp. Just a little bit of an introduction. I have been in a relationship for several years now. Unfortunately things didn't work out over the last few years and it ended recently. Somehow I was monogamous for a number of my years despite my youth being a notorious enjoyer of random sex encounters. It's been a while and since things were finalized with the ex I decided that I was tired of being horny at night. We had sex semi regularly once a week but a week but that was the past and this is the present. In a familiar but new city at the moment. Things have kind of slowed down so instead of having to edge myself at night I decided to get a haircut and have a fresh start. Enjoyed looking around in a gay area at some shops and stores such as a leather store. A great way to sort of excite myself. After that nervously I headed over to the flex bath house. The Bathhouse I've been to this place..many..many times in the past years ago before the relationship. I was nervous but excited at the same time. For an afternoon it was actually relatively busy. I had fun walking around and the sort of glancing/cruising game that people played. But I played with a guy with a room door opened. Seemed like a cute bi guy. We had fun kinda groping each other but he stated that he prefers to bottom and although not regularly a top I don't generally turn that down when the chemistry is right. He was a great cocksucker too really enjoyed having my dick sucked. It's not something I always enjoy so maybe it was the vibe or place but I was loving it. He guided me to his hole and he was surprisingly a little tighter then I thought. I asked if he's been fucked today and he said by one or two guys. I enjoyed his tight hole but I was gentle with him initially. I used to kinda just rush to come but I was having fun fucking him. He got a little hesitant and said he doesn't take loads back there he prefers it on his face or body. I fucked his mouth a little more but just a little hesitation and still mixed feelings I didn't come. He said he needed a break so we split ways. I saw some really hot bears there too. Some of them seemed like they were in a group and a few of them glanced or acknowledged but out of the cruising game so wasn't entirely sure. I found one of them later in a room jacking off. He was a really sexy bear daddy with a beautiful white beard and body. I looked at him jerking off and grabbed my cock underneath my towel and he invited me in. He was quick to suck my cock but I really enjoyed his masculine grip it suited his look and demeanor. I sucked his cock too and damn it was a nice cock and I could tell he was enjoying it. He didn't want to come yet so I fucked him some more. His ass was more loose then the bi like guy but it also felt wet and it was really turning me on and he wanted me to breed him. I was more then happy to breed him he was a sexy daddy and I was enjoying the moment and sort of putting the past behind me. He also had a nice patch of hair on his ass that was really sexy so it turned me on even more. I guess if I am doing the load count I used to do I gave one load so far lol. After that I went to take a shower. I saw another bear who I saw earlier and could not quite tell if he was into me or not. I went over the dark room area and went in one of the stalls and he went into one next to me. I stuck my cock through and he started sucking it and damn he was good at it. He stuck his through and I started slowly sucking him. I wanted to try to remember things I did with my ex so I was trying hard to please him. He stopped me partially and asked if I wanted to go to his room and of course I agreed. He had a bigger room. And pretty much immediately in his room he took control. He sort of guided me to the bed and explored my body. His lips and mouth pressed against my nipples and he passionately licked my body. He even licked my ears and face and we also kissed briefly. In short time I was sucking his cock again. He seemed to really straddle over me and forcing it down my throat. He was pretty big so I gagged a little bit. He changed the positions around and we were starting to 69. After I sucked him for a bit he changed the angles so I was licking and sucking his balls. He had nice hairy balls and then he angled it more so I was starting to lick his taint? I think. And then eventually he had me angled where my face was at the crack off his asshole. I haven't eaten ass in a very long time did not even do it with my ex. For some reason with this man I was willing to do pretty much anything I wanted. I shoved my nose, face, and tongue into his crack and rimmed him. I was hesitant at first but I was really enjoying it. The smell, the hair, and everything about him was driving me crazy. Next thing I knew he was rimming and fingering my hole. I was getting a little bit nervous but he had me suck his cock some more. He kept calling me a good boy as I was doing it so it encouraged me more. Before I knew it his cock was at my hole and I was on my back and then side. I was really nervous but I let it happen. I tried to open up but I was a little tight. He had a good girth to his cock so damn it felt good in me. It felt different then my ex in a good way. He kept pumping me with slow strokes all the while we locked eyes and he was exploring my body. I was moaning and really getting into it. Then something happened. He asked if I liked getting fucked and said he was going to cum and if I want to get fucked. I told him yes I love it and he asked again if I want to get fucked and if I like to get fucked. I don't know why I said this but I said I like getting fucked and fucking. So we switched positions and I started fucking him. I just recently bred the silver daddy and the level of passion we had was giving me some kinda mixed worries. I ended up getting soft and he said thanks and that was basically it. Ugh I fucked it up somehow. It was really intense passion and I guess I just wasn't what he was looking for. That's fine though. I walked around a little bit more and I don't think I did anything with anyone else. I decided it's time to leave but I wasn't done. Part of me wonders if he did breed me he was satisfied if I would have been as well. The Bookstore I decided to go to a popular bookstore next that I haven't been to in forever. I had no idea what the charge was but I had cash on me. The parking lot was very full so I was feeling good about this. I walked inside and saw the backroom and the charge and said that I want access. After paying I walked in the dark corridor of video booths with porn playing and guys walking around cruising. I was surprised that there were several hot guys when I came in. A few daddies and bears and I felt like I was in heaven. I walked casually but slow and then I saw him. Cute guy with a sort of mohawkish hair style and a goatee and a piercing. He looked directly at me when I walked by him. I happened to walk by a booth so we went in the booth together. We stripped our shirts and he started sucking my nipples, kissing my neck, and body and then sucked my cock a little bit. I played with his nipples but I was a little hesitant. I was really attracted to him but I try to reserve some passion if I am not sure if the guy likes It. I decided to move up high and he moved his face so I decided not to kiss him and kissed his neck instead. He was moaning and then he kissed me. He was a very passionate kisser which I like. I love to kiss. When he stripped I was surprised and impressed by all the tattoos he had on him. The passion continued and then he turned me around and he started playing with my hole. He was sort of doing that when we were kissing anyways. I felt his hard cock at my hole and I got nervous. I didn't even suck it and we said no words but he pushed inside. I was tight still but I tried to loosen up. I heard him taking a hit of poppers and then he pushed in further. Fuck it hurt but it felt good. I was trying not to moan too load being in the video booth but I couldn't help it. His cock nice and thick and my hole was getting wetter. He started to fuck me faster and I couldn't help it I had to moan out some more. He shouted out and he bred my hole without a word. He did not fully pull out he fucked my hole some more and damn my hole felt full of cock and cum. I tried to open up as much as I could so he could drain his load and shove a few more pumps. Once he pulled out he smiled and said that I am a sexy boy. I said he's a sexy man and that it was incredible and I loved it. We kissed again while we were putting on our clothes. He told me he'll be around for a little bit and asked if I will. I said yeah so we parted ways. I decided to stay and cruised around a little more. I saw a little bit of a younger guy with a nice beard. He went into a booth and I went into the opposite one. He had a nice long cock with a bit of bush. I started slowly sucking him and heard him moan. I was trying to focus on sucking him and enjoy it more when he asked if I wanted to go into a booth together so we did. He left his shirt on and sat down and pulled out his cock. I got on my knees and sucked him. I was sucking a little too fast for him I think my ex liked it fast so that's why I'm familiar with. He had me start to take it deeper and took some poppers and gave me some. He had suck him deeper and he was a lot longer and bigger then my ex so I had a little trouble. I apologized a few times but he said it was fine and was enjoying it. He asked if I wanted his load and I said yes. I sucked him some more but he seemed to enjoy being sucked more then anything with no contact. He said he needed a break and wasn't ready to cum yet. We parted ways. I walked around some more and found a dark room area. To my surprise the cute mohawk tatted guy was there. He passionately made out with me. There were some guys sucking and groping around us and we were making out. After a great make out session I started sucking his nipples and this time his cock which was hard. Damn it felt good sucking it knowing it was in me previously. While I was sucking him a guy behind me was grabbing my ass. He started fingering my ass. It seems like the guy I was sucking was encouraging the guy playing with my ass. He got up and I started sucking the other guy and he got behind me and started fucking me again. I never even pushed out his load in the bathroom because someone else was in there. Damn his cock in me felt good again. It was so fucking hot sucking some random guy in front of me too. He fucked me for a good while and I could see a crowd start to gather around us. He pulled out of me and put his cock in front of me. I immediately started sucking him and tasting his cock felt so good. The guy I was sucking got behind me and pushed his cock in my hole. Fuck I was getting spitroasted again. He felt good but I think he was getting nervous of the people around so he got soft I can't blame him I know it happens. The mohawk guy who was fucking me and making out with me suggested we go back to the room. So much more passionate kissing when we were back in the room. He kept exploring my body and I explored his. I sucked on his nipples, licked his chest and neck and loved every moment of intimacy with that man. I enjoyed sucking his cock again and looking up at him while he was looking down at me. He pulled me up and turned me around and he fucked me again. He started to say that I'm a good boy and being a good boy for daddy. He said I was making him proud and it made me just try to open up my hole even more. It did not take long until I was moaning again in pleasure and he was shouting as he bred me again. Fuck. He didn't pull out immediately like last time and fuck he shot in me again. Holy shit this man had stamina. Eventually he pulled out and I realized there were no more napkins. He said he'd go get some and be right back. He came back quickly and I wiped the cum off my ass and he wiped his cock. We embraced again and made out more while we were dressing. He said there's no need to rush getting dressed he wanted to enjoy it. He again said how sexy while we were getting dressed and I told him how sexy and hot he is and that I love his tattoos. He told me he's heading home now that he gave all he could give basically. I think saying he's at his limit and that he hopes to see me again. I told him i'll see him around. Such a hot fucking guy. He loved fucking my hole and making out and didn't seem to mind and got off when others were fucking me and even encouraged me to suck others. I almost wanted to ask for his number but being recently single I hesitated. Not sure if I regret it or not but I may or may not see him again. Time will tell. After exiting the booth I went back to the dark room. It didn't seem too busy but I saw someone standing there with a bulge or a silhouette of them. I grabbed my own cock and they kept grabbing theirs. I gently groped the man's bulge and he took his cock out. Damn it was really thick. I stroked it some more and it got hard quickly and he encouraged me to get on my knees. I started sucking him and damn his cock was really thick I was trying to take all I could take and he started moaning. As he moaned more all of a sudden the lights came on. What the fuck. He said they might be cleaning and suggested we go to a room. We went to a booth but a different one then the one i've been in. Taking a glance at him damn he was a sexy man. Big beautiful full bushy black beard and he seemed pretty stocky. When we were in the booth he started feeling my body a bit. I took off my shirt and he took off his. I wanted to go for his nipples but wasn't sure what he was into. He surprised me and started groping me more aggressive. He grabbed my hands and put them behind my back. Oh fuck he was that kind of man. He licked and sucked on my nipples and kissed them and then he kissed me. He was a great kisser not as passionate as the other guy but I loved his dominant traits. He called me a good boy too and I simply responded "Thank you Sir". I called a few men tonight Sir I guess old instincts don't go away. He let me suck his nice thick cock again and damn it was thick I tried my best to swallow it so he gave me poppers. He didn't just give me poppers though. He took a huge hit and then opened his mouth and kissed me and exhaled the poppers into my mouth and throat. Holy fuck. This man was insane. I felt the poppers spinning around and I went back to sucking him having an easier time and he started playing with my hole. He kissed me more and then told "I want to fuck you but I don't fuck here". That kinda caught me by surprise. I sucked him more and he said he needs a break and isn't ready to come yet. But he told me when he is that I should be around and I'll take his load. I don't fully know what he meant by that unless he considers guys at book stores whores and wants to only fuck guys one on one at a non public place. Regardless I loved the aggression and dominance he displayed and the passion. I had fun. I walked around a little more and to no surprise didn't see him. I did see a booth open and someone on the other side. I looked in through the peep hole and I saw an older man a gray haired daddy with a bulge in his pants. He looked at me and he got up with his underwear on. I thought he was going to leave but he grabbed his bulge and pulled out a nice thick cock. He started stroking it and I eagerly got on my knees and opened my mouth. His cock looked a little wet at first I wondered if it was a condom but then realized it was probably lube or he fucked someone previously. He pulled me closer to the peephole and I took his cock all the way down my throat. Fuck he had a great rhythm fucking my throat and I was in rhythm feeling his hard cock go in and my lips tasting his cock. Before I knew it he was pumping a little harder and I tasted something salty and sweet. Was that cum? Hot damn he was cumming down my throat. I moaned in pleasure and pumped harder pumping all of his cum down my throat. I nursed his cock like a good boy even if he didn't say it. His cock got soft and he pulled out and smiled. He got up and left. While I was there earlier in between the mohawk guy and the other random daddy sucking and getting fucked by them there was another old guy in a red shirt he seemed like he was cruising me. I think he tried to whisper something earlier to me but he took off after. I saw him again and I invited him into a room and he came in. He took off my shirt and started sucking my dick. His mouth felt great and then he turned me around and started dry humping me. Very aggressive. He took out his cock and started fucking me. He tried to fuck me and it was feeling good but he got soft and fell out. It happened a few times and then he basically said thanks and we separated. Maybe he fucked someone previously who knows. The random daddy who was fucking me and I was sucking his dick in between the mohawk guy came back around. I saw him and he looked cute older slightly chubby daddy with a cute goatee. We went into a room that was too small. He didn't seem to be into body contact too much so I just sucked him. He seemed to have a hard time getting hard but I could tell he enjoyed it and said he was. I pulled off and started stroking my cock. I read the situation wrong he didn't seem to bottom or be a cocksucker. I went back to sucking his cock and he got hard a few times and then he got soft again. I almost wanted to ask what he was into or wanting to do but the room was so small we barely could maneuver. We both agreed that the room was too small and thanked each other and separated. That was pretty much it. A few more guys were walking a round but they kept alternating between cleaning different areas I think it scared many off. I think I did see the mohawk guy again before the last random daddy I played with. I thought I saw him go into the dark room but it was someone else. I felt a little bad I couldn't tell if the mohawk goate wanted me to go with him. Honestly if he asked I would have whether that was a good idea or not. So after that I just drove home and showered and went on with the evening like normal until I decided to spend over an hour writing this travesty of a tale lol. I don't know why I called that one guy mohawk goatee it was more of a faux hawk but I don't care he was still sexy and I liked it. Afterthoughts Alright time for some after thoughts of all this and I guess load counts. I found out after the break up that my ex went to public play places a few times but claimed he didn't do anything. But then more recently claimed he tried to do something with a guy but couldn't. Honestly if he had just told me I would have been fine with it but I always felt like he hid those sorts of things. I think he was afraid to tell me because he knew I'd either cheat or want an open relationship like I initially wanted but kept it closed for him. I almost didn't go the bath house tonight but thought we're broken up now and we had many years together good times and bad times. But we are both moving on with our lives and I was damn horny. I don't know if I have the cruising down 100% right now. The bath house felt a little more awkward and I was more nervous. The bookstore I seemed to understand it better and have more confidence. I kinda wish I didn't say I liked to fuck when that sexy bear daddy was fucking me. The locking of eyes and encouragement he gave me fuck. I wonder if he would have been satisfied if he just came in me he was about to. He was still walking around for cruising afterwards. The mohawk goatee guy ugh. I so strongly wanted to exchange numbers in my mind I was thinking he'd be fun as a regular fuck buddy. But maybe it's too soon? I wonder if some of these guys I played with today could see the hesitation or how I was holding back at first with contact. I wonder if they've been through this before too and if they knew. With the bearded daddy bear who was aggressive. I've had similar things happen years ago. Sometimes guys will judge you as a whore at a bookstore or bath house and have limited interaction with you because they don't want to be associated with a whore or maybe they feel guilty themselves. It is what it is. I don't know if I'll start going on apps again. God I remember in my 20s always being on gay apps and bareback ones and always looking for a hook up. I had a lot of fuck buddies years ago. I had some..less then a handful who I could have seen as wanting to date. Some maybe wanted to date me. But I was so busy moving from one app to one picture, to one profile to the next I wasn't able to see some good things that were in front of me. I could still potentially reach out to some or I could just forget about them and meet new guys. I really hope I don't fall into the old trap I fell into. It was miserable and that's partially why I met my ex and we were together for so long. But I have to admit some things to myself. I love sex. Am I addicted to sex? Perhaps. I don't jerk off to as much porn as I used to in my 20s. I do still like porn and jerk off to it but I don't feel the need to do it for hours like I used to. I have changed a lot since before and after the relationship I was in. I don't feel so much like I "Need" to be in the arms of a man and actually enjoy being alone and doing things on my own. The biggest issue in the past was I always looking for a Daddy or a Sir to be their boy. I've spent years and different relationships in different roles. I used to regret my promiscuous past. But thinking on it lately damn it was a lot of fun. It was lonely at times too but I don't regret any of it. I want to have sex more. I want to take more cock, I want to suck and fuck and get my dick sucked. Not sure I want it everyday. Not sure I want to take multiple loads daily or everytime I go out. It just sort of happened today lol. I was afraid that by going out I would turn back into that and maybe I will and it's just invetible anyways. I felt enjoyment from multiple guys at both places. I didn't feel unsatisfied or empty after both places even if a few encounters didn't end the way I wanted. I'm really nervous about getting back on hook up apps but I think with moderation it will be okay just as long as it's not obsessive like it used to be. Uncertain of bars. I used to have.ALOT of fun in them but I feel with bars comes reputation. It doesn't matter if you are pleasuring a guy or multiple guys if they see you doing acts like that you might be branded a whore or slut especially if you are a bottom. If you are part of a popular or reputation group of guys then that can probably be bypassed. Maybe just avoiding the bars for now is best. I have also realized that i'm in my fucking 30s. Maybe I've gone through a bit of a mid crisis early on well it's definitely been crisis mode for a while anyways lol. I did not really realize how attractive I am because I never went to places with other gay guys when I was around my now ex he didn't allow it. It feels sort of good getting some validation from several guys tonight. I used to think that when I saw really attractive guys I was into in my youth maybe they were just using me as a pity fuck. Or maybe they could sense the low self confidence. Well time to start having more self confidence I can't believe I can say that I'm sexy and now I need to own it. Load Counts and Stuff To whoever read all this why the fuck did you do that lol. Anyways I hope you enjoyed the sex parts anyways. I used to write about sex encounters all the time so I might be a bit rusty. And I used to love writing about load counts. So yeah lets see. Sexy White Gray Bearded Daddy 1 Load I bred him. Passionate Fun Mohawk goatee guy fuck that man bred me 4 times. And that business daddy man who I swallowed his load in the peep hole 1 load taken oral. So 1 load given/bred, 4 loads taken/got bred, and 1 load taken/swallowed. For someone who wasn't even sure or trying to take loads tonight or give not bad. I don't know if this is the last post I'll have here or if there will be many more. But if there are more the next ones won't be so damn lengthy. Sorry just had to get a lot off as well.