The wrong time to ask if someone's "clean."

[Guest Matias47]

First, I'll preface this by saying I always post for "poz or poz friendly." Then I explain I'm POZ and undetectable.

I make a hook up last night on CL. Guy comes over, I suck his cock for a while, then get on top and slide down. We fuck for maybe 5 minute when he asks, "You're clean, right?"

I shit thee not. I laughed so hard, he almost left. I'd have let him but he was 27 and hard as iron. So, I calmed him down, then fucked his dick off.

And, yes, he was asking about HIV and not other stds.

[pssilverbear]

I'm neg and I find the use of the term "clean" offensive when it refers to hiv status. I am very poz friendly and my poz partners are very "clean". It's still rude when it refers to STDs. Be specific if you are asking if someone is positive or might have an STD. Clean should be used to talk about whether you prepped for sex or not. If you know you have an STD, why are you playing with other people anyway? Get that taken care of and then play. It's easy to remedy.

[Hotload84]

Both Matias47 and Psssilverbear are right: bottoms who are fearful of seroconverting should assume all guys are poz, and prepare accordingly. The ambiguity in the word 'clean' makes it useless: asking about HIV status, or known STDs, or the cleanliness of a bottom's ass are all fair game, but in the absence of elaboration, 'clean' can mean all of the above or one or another of them. The onus is on the party asking the question to be specific.

As an aside, when I'm asked "Are you clean?" I've taken it to be a polite inquiry as to the state of my ass. Like Pssilverbear, I wouldn't play with a guy if I knew I had a generic STD, so my answer to an inquiry about as much would be "No, I have no STDs." Similarly, if a guy asks whether I'm poz, a rare inquiry to be sure, I would answer accurately.

[glassesboi]

I ask before we even meet and not "are you clean?", I ask if they're STD-free and HIV negative. Until just a few days ago I always used condoms and still asked these two questions before anything was started.

[fuckboy20]

I thought this was about the ass being clean and I thought it was going to be about when a top fucks a bottom asks them if they are clean

I usually ask a guy if they are neg or poz before we even get naked. Clean is way too vague. If you want to know someone's status ask. I've had people admit to being poz if I flat out ask if they are poz or neg. I've been asked if I am clean before and I make sure I clean myself out before getting fucked. That's what clean means to me.

And yes every bottom should assume everyone they play with is poz.

[raunchpig]

After taking a load I will often as a guy "So are you poz" Most say yes, every once in awhile you get a guy freaking out saying he is neg, I always say if you bb you are poz or not sure. Neg is only as good as your last test. One of those fuckers will be toxic enough to take in my ass one day.

[fuckboy20]

Is it really that hard to find poz cum? So many of the sex clubs, book stores, and bath houses have poz guys. I've seen some of them online stating they are poz. Hell there is even a poz night every month (or week?) at one sex club. In Austin, TX I'd think it wouldn't be that hard.

I think it's better to ask before. If you ask after a guy is obviously going to want to lie to not freak you out or might not care. But that goes for the other side of the coin as wel. If you want to get pozzed and ask a guy if he is poz he might lie and say he is poz when he is neg. Just be upfront

[GreenChaser]

I always say if you bb you are poz or not sure. Neg is only as good as your last test.

i really like this quote.