is it OK for a neg guy to lie about his status?

[spunk-receptacle]

Hi guys,

Quick question if I may? Is it OK for a neg guy to lie about his status when talkint to POZ guys?

I am currently neg and found quite a few POZ guys wont give me the time of day when I tell them I am neg.

Is it OK to say I am poz when I am talking to another poz guy?

[mtncumboy]

I would say its fine if thats your turn on. I have found POZ guys cant stay hard if they know Im neg. I just try to avoid getting asked

[einathens]

in theory, no. everyone should be honest about their status when asked, and loads should be neither given nor taken under false pretenses.

in practice, 'probably' is a useful answer.

[RotzBBengel]

No harm done, I'd say. After all it's about your health, not theirs. And if you do that regularly, it won't matter anymore soon enough, anyway.

[bearbandit]

No harm done, I'd say. After all it's about your health, not theirs. And if you do that regularly, it won't matter anymore soon enough, anyway.

HIV isn't the only STI out there, and guys with HIV don't have exclusive rights over those other STIs (some of which are more dangerous to poz poz guys than they are to neg guys, syphilis for example). It's generally reckoned that about a quarter of the HIV+ population of a country don't know they have have it, which means that those guys' CD4 counts are dropping and their viral loads rising without them knowing anything about it. Which, of course, makes it easier to pick up all manner of things. Unless you go to tonight's fuck's place directly from the clinic that gave you negative results, neg doesn't actually mean much, which is why I prefer to talk in terms of HIV poz and HIV unknown. Except for very limited circumstances only HIV poz guys know their status for sure.

[spunk-receptacle]

Thanks for the info guys, I really appreciate it. Bearbandit, thank you for the words above. I have considered that whilst enjoying bareback sex and being almost 100% bottom that I can pick up other STI's which I shall deal with when they happen... Thanks again for the words.

[Bttm2go]

My last test, two weeks ago, says I'm still neg. really does not mean much since I could very well be converting and it's too soon for it to show up. Generally the top never asks me my status and when they do, I honestly say I don't know. Because really I don't. I just try to avoid the subject. However, if you want to tell him you are poz when you are not, I really don't see the harm. Now if you were poz and told the guy you are neg, that's a different story. That would not be cool.

[spunk-receptacle]

I totally hear you Bttm2go. Once I am POZ I will never lie about my status so much so that I am becoming quite fond of the idea of getting a biohazard symbol tattoo'd on my hip below my waist line...

[Slut4anyload]

I that's what you need to do to get the load, I think it's OK.

[GermanFucker]

As always I'd like to point out that Breedingzone is NOT representativ of the gay community as a whole. Most poz guys on here won't mind seeding neg holes. And if a slut on here says he's neg, it's indeed somewhat likely he might unknowingly be poz. However, I'd be cautious to make that a general rule.

Unless you go to tonight's fuck's place directly from the clinic that gave you negative results, neg doesn't actually mean much, which is why I prefer to talk in terms of HIV poz and HIV unknown. Except for very limited circumstances only HIV poz guys know their status for sure.

While this is technically true, there are indeed a number of neg guys where it is 99,x% likely that they are indeed neg. If you come from a place with a low HIV prevalence, your previous behaviour (mostly safer sex, bi men who only rarely get to fuck around with men etc.) only seldom created risk situations, and you get tested somewhat regularly, while not certain, it is indeed overwhelmingly likely you are neg.

Also there are poz guys who really need the peace of mind that comes from knowing the other guy has HIV, too, to really enjoy barebacking without second thoughts.

So saying it's ok to lie because as a neg guy you never know for sure, is a way of rationalizing one's own behaviour. It is by far not as bad as saying you're neg when indeed you're (unmedicatedly) poz. But I do believe that when it comes to sex, everyone should have the chance to decide for himself. To me, self-determination is a very important aspect of barebacking.

So the best way is alway to openly discuss things beforehand. That doesn't mean one cannot test the waters. Just as one can say one's poz without actually saying it (I haven't been tested neg recently and there's a good chance I'm poz, so if a neg status is important to you, you might better skip this one), the same goes the other way around (I haven't been tested yesterday [who knows that's meant literally rather than figuratively] and I don't really care about status, but yeah, there's a small chance I'm neg, If you really insist on me being poz..."). If the other guy doesn't make a fuss then, he probably doesn't care that much himself, either.