HIV - is the message getting through?

[rangus]

Picture - last Saturday night I visited a local sauna - bareass night - no towels. I spent a lot of time in my hands and knees in the dark room - as usual. Don't know how many cocks i took, but DO know i took 4 loads. At no time was I asked my status, and none of the cocks were rubbered up. Don't get me wrong - i hate condoms, and love the feeling of raw cock in my hole.

My query - am I wrong in assuming that all the guys who fucked me were poz??? - or is it that they don't care any more, or that they're ignorant of HIV (in this day and age??) - or that HIV is the new common cold?

I'd love to hear your comments.

(and rawTOP - if this is posted to the wrong area - my apologies - and hope you can direct it to the right place)

[PissPigBrooklyn]

I think that you are correct in assuming that attitudes toward HIV transmission are much more cavalier than a decade ago. The reasons are probably varied. One can (and should) presume that the guys who fucked you raw were or could be positive. If they were no positive then they don't care or operate under the erroneous assumption that topping does not expose one to HIV transmission or correctly that the act of topping is less susceptible to transmission. Another possibility now is that they are on PreP and have lessened their exposure to contacting the virus that way. It is possible they they are ignorant of AIDS and HIV transmission but as you point out in this day and age that is the least likely of the possibilities.

[bearbandit]

I'm not so sure of that last sentence PissPigBrooklyn. I get a fair number of "please fuck me, Daddy" messages on Grindr, which is the only place I don't make it clear that I'm HIV+. It started out as an experiment to see how clued up guys are about HIV since I volunteer for an HIV organisation. If I'm interested I bring up HIV by asking them if they know their HIV status. I've had insults, "no, I'm not old enough"(!), instant ending of conversations and several times from guys in their thirties "what's HIV?"

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

I agree with bearbandit PPB, young guys are amazingly uninformed/misinformed about HIV.

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

That and the crazy notion that HIV is somehow a gift. While my many poz buds have dealt with it well, on balance none would consider it a gift (at least nothing they want). There are many who believe HIV is inevitable and thus embrace it. But PrEP takes away that inevitability.

[nekofox]

Still so amazing how so many are either ignorant (TOO strong a possibility) or some how missed getting that info.

With me being 31, stuff like HIV and AIDS was taught in school almost as synonymous as "saying no to drugs". It still boggles my mind sometimes how it is that there are so many who don't know one thing from another. Oh well, just like the others have said, it's the "new generation" that's coming up without too much care in the world, thinking they'll live forever.

[PissPigBrooklyn]

I think that if one substituted AIDS for HIV you would find a lot of people who know what it is. I guess I will have to concede that ignorance and denial are stronger than I admit.

[bb1991]

For the younger generation at least...

Education is everything and it is sorely lacking in most places in the world. The only "sex ed" we had at school was how the reproductive system worked and how to stop girls getting pregnant (even then, condoms were not the primary thing they were pushing and stds weren't mentioned).

So entering into the world of sex, I hadn't a clue about HIV, AIDs or any other stds for that matter, because I just didn't know they existed. The only one I'd ever heard of was syphilis. And that was only because of the famous people in history who'd had it: Casanova for example.

Parents don't talk about that stuff, and neither do schools. You can't just expect people to know - how can they know something if they've never heard of it, never been told and never been educated?

I think there's also a lack of understanding about living with HIV too -people see the "benefits" (bareback) but are naive or uneducated about the consequences and reality. After all, you don't see the huge HIV related deathcount anymore, but then you see all the porn stars or the people on the gay scene with 6 packs and muscles and to all appearances are very happy and healthy despite being HIV+. People want to live that casual bareback lifestyle but don't seem to know the realities of HIV until they actually catch it.

[bearbandit]

I think that if one substituted AIDS for HIV you would find a lot of people who know what it is. I guess I will have to concede that ignorance and denial are stronger than I admit.

I think that was one of the biggest mistakes we made in the eighties: the separation of HIV disease into several different components with different names: a progression from HIV+, to PGL, to ARC, to aids. All stages of the same illness. I suppose the intent was to reduce the anxiety levels of those who hadn't yet reached the "stage" of aids, yet when I was diagnosed with aids in 1991 it was via anal herpes lasting longer than a month while being treated. I was still riding my motorbike around London and working. In the UK we rarely talk about aids any more, but rather "late stage HIV disease". Almost as soon as you get HIV, you're immune deficient as your CD4 count drops and your viral load rises when you seroconvert.

I guess it was the urgency and required speed that stopped us considering things like that. I remember the demonstrations to get AZT released for use in the mid-eighties, I even took it myself, knowing how many people it had killed through anaemia. The history of HIV is littered with both the most brilliant medical/psychological work we've ever seen and some of the most grotesque mistakes (condom nazis, AZT, ddI, d4t, high dose ritonavir). I recently took part in an oral history project about HIV: my interview is littered with exclamations of surprise from the interviewer, himself a survivor of nearly thirty years.

Sex education in schools is the best way to get the message across: I don't think it unreasonable to devote an entire term to HIV. Unfortunately in the UK parents have a right to withdraw their kids from sex education classes, and a "guest educator" as I would be has to undergo an expensive Criminal Record check to be allowed into the school in the first place, so when I do training work it's always for adults, which is too damn late!

[Guest GoodExercise]

For younger guys, HIV is a fact of life lumped in with other STIs. No big deal.

[Slampoz4neg]

I tested poz at 17 after fucking raw with a leather poz fuck bud at 16 for a year.

[Slampoz4neg]

There was loads of info about thought id get it anyway as I'm a dirty fucker so searched it out

[Guest GoodExercise]

The do-gooders succeeded in de-stigmatizing HIV and letting guys know that it is not a death sentence. And the drug companies succeeded in glamorizing HIV-infected men and making once-daily meds look as easily manageable as a multi-vitamin. So yes, the messages got through.

[man4uall]

I too am amazed at the young guys that hit me up (older here) who want to play with a 'daddy'. They do not ask of status. When I try to wrap, they say not needed and do not ask about status. The same with several married guys I know that play both sides of the fence. They tell me not to wrap or pull it off and cherish my loads deep inside them! I recently asked one of my regular married bottoms to specifically get tested (for everything - I heard another guy brag about breeding him several times - the other guy is not undetectable - I am). He came back a couple of weeks later saying he's all clear. I had a face to face talk with him about the risk - he admitted it was a risk, but can't get over the feeling of having a man pulse his load(s) into his ass.

But it's the young guys (that should be knowledgeable of this) who are all about getting a daddy inside them shooting their loads. I do like younger guys that are interested in me, but I do wonder if they realize what they're playing with!

I'm not so sure of that last sentence PissPigBrooklyn. I get a fair number of "please fuck me, Daddy" messages on Grindr, which is the only place I don't make it clear that I'm HIV+. It started out as an experiment to see how clued up guys are about HIV since I volunteer for an HIV organisation. If I'm interested I bring up HIV by asking them if they know their HIV status. I've had insults, "no, I'm not old enough"(!), instant ending of conversations and several times from guys in their thirties "what's HIV?"

[PERVERSATILE]

Devils advocate here-

Everyone anticipatin' Christmas w/ *****? I mean "holidays" -Hell I dudn't even rhyme,

--as a young man I was completely Cognisant and totally Cavalier ( LUV that word ) about AIDS/HIV

(both my parents are DokTORS)

I was even a Sex Industry Worker (that means Whore)

and seriously enjoyed my non-vocational sex (that means whorin around)

Oddly enuf I didn't ketch the HIV until I was 35,

and Praise Jebus I have responded to treatment w/ text book success.

Today's sexually active teen on the go isn't ignorant about HIV just a lil apathetic,

It's not that he doesn't know, it's that he doesn't care.

Factor in General Malaise,

indifference

and sum of that trendy nihilism

w/ a secret tiny tiny bit of sparkly sunshine candy corn rainbow magic that sez,

"It ain't no big thang ~ a pill will fix it. if i git IT, when i git IT"

Fuk it all ta Hell Man

-gimme that Load

-CumDump my faggothole Daddy!

How can I point a finger

~I invented "Give A Fuck Factor Minus Ten"