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Posted

So I'm 22, in-shape, active, healthy, a uni student, pretty happy and unstressed in life right now.

In the past getting an erection was never a problem, in fact it was the opposite, I was always hard, I'd stay hard after sex for ages, if anything I was too hard...

Suddenly in December I lost my erection mid way through sex, I was pretty freaked out as it had never happened before and I was pretty embarrassed.

Same thing happened in February, again, embarrased.

Mentioned it to my doctor who said I was probably just stressed

In March I was fine, managed to stay hard the entire time and thought, phew, must have been a phase, then in April again happened again, then it didn't, then it did.

I can get hard when jerking fine, and I get hard during foreplay, rock hard, but then guaranteed after a few minutes of topping it goes completely soft.

I've been having sex for years with absolutely no problems whatsoever so I'm at a complete loss as to where this has come from - condoms make no difference.

Another thing I've noticed is that occasionally when i'm jerking I cum suddenly with no orgasm, cum just oozes out with no force, no pleasure, and then I go soft - could this be related?

I only jerk a few times a week, which is the same amount as always, maybe a bit less even.

Open to any suggestions and help here guys. Really want to get back to power topping asap.

Posted

bud - could be any number of things .. could be over the counter medications (alergy, sinus, lots of other stuff too) .. perscription stuff .. there are a lot of things that can affect your bone .. if your doctor said it's stress - you should find another doctor .. sounds like he didn't try much to help ..

Posted

I had a problem with stress years ago, knocked me back, then I got my nipples pierced and BOOM instant erection, never a problem since

Posted

Have someone check your prostate. I had a buddy experience similar things in his mid twenties and he had prostate issues. It may be totally unrelated, but it might give you some guidance.

Posted

Another thing to have checked is your testosterone levels. Something might be screwing up your body's production of that all important hormone. It's a simple blood test.

Posted

There is a very long list of things that could be causing this. In your 'later years', it can be almost as common as not. But at 22, I would suspect that you need to check in with a few people to find the problem. (luckily, I'd guess that whatever is causing the issue will be easier to narrow down and solve... in a few decades, it can be any combination of issues)

The problem may be anything from physical (as simple as diet or as complex as disease), mental (depression to mental illness), emotional (long-buried trauma or recent break-up) or even environmental (allergies, temperature, surroundings).

Schedule a talk with your doc. But also make an appointment with a therapist. Don't let the stress of potential stress make it worse... just be completely honest with everyone you speak to about it (and if you feel even mildly uncomfortable bringing it up with them, break it down to generalizations and ask for a referral to someone you CAN talk to)

It might be as simple as not being entirely attracted to your partner. Or it could be an alien tumor insert in your brain. Get it checked out now while it's a concern, not after it's become a debilitating problem.

Oh... and also consider... it might just be a new kink emerging. Sex CAN be fun as FUCK when an erection fails to happen or goes awry... may as well google some porn about it and see if any of it tickles ya.

Posted (edited)

It's probably something as simple as overthinking. I've struggled with this too, as have most people at some time or other I guess. My take on this - which has worked for me is this:

Erections occur because you're relaxed and aroused and thinking of nothing else. Anything that disconnects you from the arousal - tenses you or otherwise engages your rational thought such as worry about losing or keeping an erection, your partner doing something you don't like, or an unwelcome interruption will likely kill your arousal and your erection.

Once you lose it you won't get it back until you stop thinking about your erection and get back into aroused thoughts. That's not easy, but what you can try is focussing your thoughts on the feel of the air in your nose as you breathe in and out slowly - to calm you mind - and on your stimulation be that partner or porn - and your erection should start to come back. The theory is your brain can't think if more than two things at once, so you lose the focus on the worry.

I hope that helps - have a good one (or three) ;)

Edited by slowfuck
Clarification
Posted

Thanks for the words of wisdom guys.

I'm certain it's not diet/exercise related, I've always eaten pretty clean and exercise regularly - I think the testosterone thing will be worth pursuing as I've generally been less horny than usual these past few months. I'll keep you all updated.

Posted
Thanks for the words of wisdom guys.

I'm certain it's not diet/exercise related, I've always eaten pretty clean and exercise regularly - I think the testosterone thing will be worth pursuing as I've generally been less horny than usual these past few months. I'll keep you all updated.

yeah I doubt its low testosterone...true low T ratings are fairly rare.

You porobably wont like my answer but its the most likely one...

Its all in your head.

You may have had trouble getting hard once, for any number of reasons, but almost certainly not an ongoing physical issue. However because you have that memory of that issue, its something you always remember, and continue going back to that same memory when thinking about sex, thus it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

Very few people have a physical manifestation of ED at your age, and even when guys are older, percentage wise its not that high. I dont have a solution for you, but its going to be something along the lines of stop worrying about it, your dick is fine.

  • 3 weeks later...
Guest kazore
Posted

People who are addicted to porn can have difficulties to maintain an erection. They sometimes feel bored or nothing while they're having sex.

Posted

Yes, Kazore, I tend to agree that some porn to get one in the mood is fine, but over-indulgence can lead to becoming more turned on by being voyeuristic and addicted to the cumshot compilations, and unwilling - possibly unable - to relate with and build sexual excitement slowly with a sex partner in real life.

People who are addicted to porn can have difficulties to maintain an erection. They sometimes feel bored or nothing while they're having sex.
Posted

Get checked for diabetes: you're still young enough for diabetes 1 and old enough for diabetes 2. While it's unlikely to be diabetes, it does damage the nerve that closes down the return of blood from an erection. Nothing to eat after midnight and see a pharmacist (or friend with a testing kit) around nine. If the result is in double figures, damage is happening to your veins and arteries: see you doctor. Between 4 and 7 (under the old system) are considered normal.

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