Violence in the story posts here and in gay porn?

[Guest]

I was just wondering why a lot of the posts in the story forums here have violence associated with the sex. Not just rape, but stealthing, or non-consensensual sex/pozzing. When reading some sex addiction literature, the experts suggest that porn addicts lose the ability to cum from intimacy with sex partner and need escalation of the sex act to achieve orgasm, from mundane, to kinky, to taboo , to violent, etc.

Has else anyone noticed this or have thoughts on violence and gay sex?

[otebbtop]

I was just wondering why a lot of the posts in the story forums here have violence associated with the sex. Not just rape, but stealthing, or non-consensensual sex/pozzing. When reading some sex addiction literature, the experts suggest that porn addicts lose the ability to cum from intimacy with sex partner and need escalation of the sex act to achieve orgasm, from mundane, to kinky, to taboo , to violent, etc.

Has else anyone noticed this or have thoughts on violence and gay sex?

Until reading your post, I hadn't really pondered the "violence" of stealthing or pozzing. I can only offer "thoughts"

Everyone has their own triggers, so there likely are some for whom this is a way of acting out violence, whether they are placed in the role of aggressor or victim.

I think there are also those that get an emotional attachment from pozzing or stealthing. Pozzing - giving a part of ones self to another to carry or receiving a part of another to carry. Also aspects of this in some way permanently bonding the two, or that the load is mystical or magical...differing from a negative load.

Stealthing - forcing (obvious violent undertone as aggressor) another to carry this part and exercising dominance over another.

Being stealthed (victim of the violence) either submitting to the aggressor's dominance, or resisting but powerless to do otherwise (raped).

And also the "no means yes" aspect that the aggressor is actually granting the victim's true desire, or the "victim" having the true desire but only able to fulfill by stealth "it's too late to turn back now."

There's also the stealthing "victim" - seeking a carrier from whom they can take the seed (lying about status to get a charged load, when in fact they are negative).

[bearbandit]

Good question... I was raped at the age of 19, though my anger resulting from that as directed more at the then current British law which would have had prosecuted me as well as the rapists. I've long ago resolved the issues surrounding the rape, but am aware (and when I get the chance) act upon fantasies of rape. My late partner, who was a much guy than me, especially as I was going through HIV wasting at the time, sat me down down for the "something's not right" talk. What wasn't right was that I'd be in the sling screaming "no" when I actually meant "yes" and he didn't know which I meant. An agreement to re-instate the stop word system put that to rights...

I'm always cautious of sex addiction literature: while it's true that a few people have a problem with inappropriate behaviour, in general so called "sex addicts" are simply people who're getting more than you are. The cycle of escalation you quote is, to me, complete nonsense. What of the guy who discovers he likes torture or being beaten before he discovers he likes piss? What is kinky? What is mundane? For that matter, what is violent? It wouldn't be the first time I've attended a gay community meeting proudly bearing the bruises I got the night before.

What I have noticed is the increase in rape involving drugging someone first. To me, that fucking stinks (as does any form of non-fantasy rape). I know several guys in the UK who've acquired HIV as a result of such rapes. Double trauma. At least I got HIV while I was having fun rather than being in fear of my life.

The important word is "consent". I've had guys complain about my Pozdaddy series because of the sexual violence that occasionally shows up, but I'm always careful to make it clear that the violence is consensual. Admittedly you sometimes have to go back a few episodes to find the consent, either direct or implied, but it's always there. In short violence and sex can be great fun when consensual, and it can be your worst nightmare when it isn't consensual.

[otebbtop]

BTW a later thought/question is how the concept of "breeding" or that a charged load "impregnates". I has seemed, at least to me, to move some into a body modification/dysmorphic behavior.

Personally, fisting is something that I will do on occasion, depending on my partner. If I were suddenly confronted with exploding innards ("the rosebud" or more serious prolapse) I'd freak. I've seen a lot more guys that are engaged in this heavy duty play, some appearing to strive for their ass to appear more like the female reproductive organ. I suspect (without anything whatsoever to back it up) that there is a lot of heavy drug use involved.

There are plenty of guys that call their ass their pussy or their cunt or boicunt or mancunt or whatever...doing so is likely to turn me off.

[slowfuck]

It seems to me that there is a lot of violence towards the extremes of sexual play, but it's not restricted to gay play by any means. I guess that often we get turned on by pretending to be who we're not in our public lives. For example a top company executive getting off on being a sub slave for the duration of play for example, and to some extent maybe the received homophobia we soak up from our early experience can come out in play acting too. Fuck the filthy slut, abuse the faggot and all the other demeaning and abusive themes seem to derive from that strand. I suspect it is empowering to act out and take ownership in one's own way? Personally the heavier side to this turns me off somewhat, but then I tend to look for affection and approval so I guess it would

[cublad]

fiction is fantasy, whereas we may not like/want it in real life thats what fiction is for, i write what i like to write, if you choose to read it them good for you, but you do not have to read it if it offends you

[daddybear]

I think the name of the webpage 'breeding zone' denotes a note of taboo or perversion, so i really do not understand your concerns....if you do not like it do not read it after all no one is making you....and we have to remember that what your talking about is FICTION, its a made up story by people who may like to delve into their minds and explore their dark side in fantasy at least and why not let them.

As cublad rightly says if it offends you do not read it or troll the story boards in those topics.

[bearbandit]

It seems to me that there is a lot of violence towards the extremes of sexual play, but it's not restricted to gay play by any means. I guess that often we get turned on by pretending to be who we're not in our public lives. For example a top company executive getting off on being a sub slave for the duration of play for example, and to some extent maybe the received homophobia we soak up from our early experience can come out in play acting too. Fuck the filthy slut, abuse the faggot and all the other demeaning and abusive themes seem to derive from that strand. I suspect it is empowering to act out and take ownership in one's own way? Personally the heavier side to this turns me off somewhat, but then I tend to look for affection and approval so I guess it would

I think it's simply acknowledging the animal side of our nature. I had a rottweiler who used to help people with a fear of dogs. He was obviously the runt of the litter, though he had quite a distinguished pedigree. One day I was walking him and a mastiff tried to pull the dominance thing of mounting him. He wasn't having any of it and the fight ended with his teeth pressed against the mastiff "I could have you if I wanted to". I think we, as gay men, many of us with at least a passing interest in BDSM, show similar characteristics, especially during sex. Which is not to say that it's essential: I'd be hard put to decide which I wanted more - a night of hard sex or a night of quiet intimacy. As I said above I recovered from being raped (and I truly did think I was being murdered) by re-enacting it to the point where it's a turn on for me, because I know I'm the one with the stop word. As an aside I volunteer as a peer supporter for people with HIV, so I guess I kinda fit into the role inversion thing. On the increasingly rare times I top I've been told I'm fucking dangerous (in a good way). But that doesn't preclude the fact that I enjoy going to sleep holding or being held by a nice hot man...

[seaguy]

This forum is a place where people can post the fantasies that they have without fear of being attacked because thier fantasy might be a bit kinky or different from the norm. That said your going to get some twisted fantasies... But I would not say that it necessarily means that allot of the users are violent sexual deviants most of what is written that is violent in nature is fictional from what I see and suspect.