The power of piss

[tallslenderguy]

Was thinking about the power of piss this morning after reading some posts on another site from a guy who wanted to figure out how to pee his diaper during the night while he slept.

So many layers too that.  i'm not one for 'role play.'  i find reality is so much more fun and intense, and there are so many of us out here with kinks, i'd rather experience those kinks with someone i have chemistry with  that play some sort of pretend role. 

Age 'play' has no appeal to me, but i have experienced being regressed by an intelligent, understanding and affectionate  Dom, and it was a mind bending experience.  

my guess is, part of the power of WS for me is rooted in the fact that i wet my bed till i was 13.  It was deeply emotional, humiliating and frustrating for me.  i tried so hard not to, and had no control or understanding, which probably exacerbated it.  But, eventually, i stopped. That natural and normal barrier/boundry that gets formed in the brain and tells the body to hold your pee in while your asleep, finally and eventually formed in me.  

Reading  about another's needs and desires this morning exposed what i call a "collar place" in my emotional/psychological make up, and i realized more about how a Mans piss and my pee can be powerful places where a Dom/Top can collar me.  The guy i was reading about was talking about making himself pee his diaper while he slept, which has no appeal for me. i don't want to make myself do anything, As a bottom with some sub mixed in, i respond to the machinations of a Top/Dom who's needs and desires are to control and create using a sub bottom.

i imagined having a Man in my life who set about to collar me using that emotional place from my childhood and taking me back there by reverse training or manipulating me so that He removes that boundary or barrier in my brain and takes me back to a place where i wet myself as i sleep.  It's a strange thought, because that was such a painful and frustrating part of my life, so i don't completely understand why it's such and exciting thought to imagine a Man in my life who has the power to control and affect me in that way?

[backdoorjimmy]

3 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

Age 'play' has no appeal to me, but i have experienced being regressed by an intelligent, understanding and affectionate  Dom, and it was a mind bending experience.  

my guess is, part of the power of WS for me is rooted in the fact that i wet my bed till i was 13.  It was deeply emotional, humiliating and frustrating for me.  i tried so hard not to, and had no control or understanding, which probably exacerbated it.  But, eventually, i stopped. That natural and normal barrier/boundry that gets formed in the brain and tells the body to hold your pee in while your asleep, finally and eventually formed in me.  

I'm not into age play either, but I'd be lying if I said that my desire to be a toilet wasn't connected to my childhood. I have memories going back to before I was in elementary school of being a bed wetter and pants wetter, too. And as I got older I would lay in bed and tell myself stories about it - some of them were real memories and others were stories I made up about going to the bathroom in my pants on purpose. Looking back I know now that I was just fantasizing about something that had become a fetish for me. 

When I was in 5th grade I started staying home alone without a babysitter and used my time alone to live out those fantasies and indulge my fetishes. It wasn't sexual at all at the time; I thought I was just being naughty. I would intentionally go to the bathroom in my pants and go about my afterschool routine - homework, getting a snack, watching YouTube clips on my phone. Then I'd toss my wet, stinking clothes in the hamper and change into a clean pair of pants before or after my mom came home from work. The first time she caught me in the act she asked me to tell her what I was doing and I just spilled my guts to her and she let it go. After that I didn't have to hide it anymore. 

Over the years I realized that it was about more than just wanting to be naughty. I was able to recognize the feelings that I got from engaging in that kind of play. I still love to pee my pants, especially when I'm horny or stressed out. It gives me a feeling that I can't explain. Sometimes I just let a few spurts out in my pants when I'm in public and no one knows. Other times I totally soak my pants on "accident" at home or on purpose if I'm alone. My mom knows fully about this and sometimes she'll bring it up when my room starts stinking, or if she catches me in the act of it when I'm not expecting her to walk in. But it's been almost 10 years since she caught me the first time and she knows that it's just something I do. 

When I'm really lucky my bf will come over and use me as his toilet. It took a long time to get him there, but he's gotten into the routine of coming over and taking his full leak in my mouth while I kneel in front of him in the tub. It gives me that same feeling I used to get when I was little and would lay in bed fantasizing about going to the bathroom in my pants and I wouldn't trade it for the world. 

[tallslenderguy]

31 minutes ago, backdoorjimmy said:

When I'm really lucky my bf will come over and use me as his toilet. It took a long time to get him there, but he's gotten into the routine of coming over and taking his full leak in my mouth while I kneel in front of him in the tub. It gives me that same feeling I used to get when I was little and would lay in bed fantasizing about going to the bathroom in my pants and I wouldn't trade it for the world. 

i find that so hot and sort of affirming as well. i have fairly complex and involved notions about the sexual/nature spectrum with. my wiring has sub, bottom at one end and Dom Top on the other end, of the spectrum, versatile somewhere in between. i see the 'spectrum as multidimensional, not just linear, and i believe that there is such a thing as dom bottoms or sub tops, but i understand that i don't have chemistry with that, so for me, Dom is always Top and sub is always bottom, with a whole complex list of what constitutes "Top" or "bottom."  For instance, i see bottom as not just a physical thing, but emotional, psychological.  

In that vein of reasoning, as a bottom i relate as being the receiver, one who gets pissed in and on, penetrated, psychologically inseminated.  The fact that your bf "took a long time to get there" in my mind is more a factor of cultural conditioning than nature. With no evidence to base this on (lol), i think He is a Dom Top by nature and that His natural inclination is to penetrate, deposit Himself in a bottom, leave His 'mark' on a bottom, etc.. What you guys overcame was cultural conditioning He had against putting HIs piss in you, but He eventually gave in to His nature as He discovered it served as an expression of Who He is.  

Lol, fanciful maybe, but i think there has always been an understanding of D/s Top/bottom as nature (consider the ancient philosophy of yin/yang). Thought the expressions of the D/s T/b dynamic can be infinite, at the the core needs/desires  like wanting to piss in/on to mark, subdue, own and desires/needs to be pissed in/on, be marked, subdued, owned, are  (awesome) expressions of our basic natures.  i see them all as based i the needs/desires to penetrate, inseminate and impregnate in creative ways. 

[backdoorjimmy]

33 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

i find that so hot and sort of affirming as well. i have fairly complex and involved notions about the sexual/nature spectrum with. my wiring has sub, bottom at one end and Dom Top on the other end, of the spectrum, versatile somewhere in between. i see the 'spectrum as multidimensional, not just linear, and i believe that there is such a thing as dom bottoms or sub tops, but i understand that i don't have chemistry with that, so for me, Dom is always Top and sub is always bottom, with a whole complex list of what constitutes "Top" or "bottom."  For instance, i see bottom as not just a physical thing, but emotional, psychological.  

I've always seen myself as a sub bottom, even before I had sex. I didn't know what a bottom was but I knew I was one. In my relationship with my boyfriend I'm definitely the sub. But there's more going on between us than the dynamic in the bedroom. There's the way he takes charge of everything, from holding doors to ordering for me when we're in the drive thru without asking what I want. It dominates almost every part of our relationship and it spills over into the WS realm. When I was flirting with the idea of asking him to pee for me, I was terrified that he'd reject me and walk out on me. I posted here asking for advice and started slow. Holding his dick while he peed, then encouraging him to pee on me in the shower. Then it was asking him to pee in my hair on his way out the door, or pee all over my ass while I was wearing clothes. It was 100% submissive, but in a strange way I was taking on the assertive roll because I was guiding him to my ultimate goal of him pissing in my mouth. 

38 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

In that vein of reasoning, as a bottom i relate as being the receiver, one who gets pissed in and on, penetrated, psychologically inseminated.  The fact that your bf "took a long time to get there" in my mind is more a factor of cultural conditioning than nature. With no evidence to base this on (lol), i think He is a Dom Top by nature and that His natural inclination is to penetrate, deposit Himself in a bottom, leave His 'mark' on a bottom, etc.. What you guys overcame was cultural conditioning He had against putting HIs piss in you, but He eventually gave in to His nature as He discovered it served as an expression of Who He is.  

I think he would have gone there a lot sooner if it weren't for my fear of rejection. He could tell something was on my mind but I didn't know how to say it tactfully. I wanted him to know that I was fantasizing about being his full time toilet but it was a hard thing to admit. So I took a different approach and it paid off. Funny enough, he was a total bottom before we met. He only fucked me for the first time because we were at the same party and everyone was taking turns in my ass. He was so turned on that he mounted me and fucked me, then we started seeing each other every single day. We both see other guys and he's strictly a cum slut unless he's with me.

I still haven't confessed everything I want from him, but I have a feeling he knows and is waiting for me to lead him there, but it's scary. 

44 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

Lol, fanciful maybe, but i think there has always been an understanding of D/s Top/bottom as nature (consider the ancient philosophy of yin/yang). Thought the expressions of the D/s T/b dynamic can be infinite, at the the core needs/desires  like wanting to piss in/on to mark, subdue, own and desires/needs to be pissed in/on, be marked, subdued, owned, are  (awesome) expressions of our basic natures.  i see them all as based i the needs/desires to penetrate, inseminate and impregnate in creative ways. 

Pretty much everyone in my life probably knows that I'm a sub-bottom. Even my mom knows. Sometimes I wonder if it's related to the daddy issues I had growing up. I longed for a bond with my dad but he passed away when I was 4 and I don't have any memories of him. I used to snuggle into men's sides and was especially worried about being obedient when my mom was dating because I longed for that approval. On the other hand, I'm even submissive at work and around other family members. So it's ingrained in me, and it just feels right to be a sub-bottom. Being marked by my lovers is just another way for me to express that position in the bed and in life. 

[tallslenderguy]

6 minutes ago, backdoorjimmy said:

I've always seen myself as a sub bottom, even before I had sex. I didn't know what a bottom was but I knew I was one. In my relationship with my boyfriend I'm definitely the sub. But there's more going on between us than the dynamic in the bedroom. There's the way he takes charge of everything, from holding doors to ordering for me when we're in the drive thru without asking what I want. It dominates almost every part of our relationship and it spills over into the WS realm. When I was flirting with the idea of asking him to pee for me, I was terrified that he'd reject me and walk out on me. I posted here asking for advice and started slow. Holding his dick while he peed, then encouraging him to pee on me in the shower. Then it was asking him to pee in my hair on his way out the door, or pee all over my ass while I was wearing clothes. It was 100% submissive, but in a strange way I was taking on the assertive roll because I was guiding him to my ultimate goal of him pissing in my mouth. 

I think he would have gone there a lot sooner if it weren't for my fear of rejection. He could tell something was on my mind but I didn't know how to say it tactfully. I wanted him to know that I was fantasizing about being his full time toilet but it was a hard thing to admit. So I took a different approach and it paid off. Funny enough, he was a total bottom before we met. He only fucked me for the first time because we were at the same party and everyone was taking turns in my ass. He was so turned on that he mounted me and fucked me, then we started seeing each other every single day. We both see other guys and he's strictly a cum slut unless he's with me.

I still haven't confessed everything I want from him, but I have a feeling he knows and is waiting for me to lead him there, but it's scary. 

Pretty much everyone in my life probably knows that I'm a sub-bottom. Even my mom knows. Sometimes I wonder if it's related to the daddy issues I had growing up. I longed for a bond with my dad but he passed away when I was 4 and I don't have any memories of him. I used to snuggle into men's sides and was especially worried about being obedient when my mom was dating because I longed for that approval. On the other hand, I'm even submissive at work and around other family members. So it's ingrained in me, and it just feels right to be a sub-bottom. Being marked by my lovers is just another way for me to express that position in the bed and in life. 

i'm pretty feminist (not feminine), and i'm convinced that patriarchy applied universally to male/female has fucked things up, because it doesn't always apply. There are Dom women just like there are Dom men, There are Top women, just like there are Top Men.  i think those things are emotional/psycological dispositions. They may find lots of different expression in sex, but i don't think sex dictates the postions (physical or emotional) we take, but the other way around. 

i don't believe a bottom/subs kinks, needs, desires are a matter of being unsubmissive... i think they are what makes him who He is, and that can get really complex, i know. Like some subs need/want things like to be objectified, bullied, beat up... and some Dom's need/want a sub like that. But i think that is individual expression, not a universal rule. i think the best relationships are based on chemistry. Again, i pull from natural law, opposites attract and bond. But were human, not ions. Our 'electrical charge' charge is much more complex because we have intellect and emotions... which makes the process exciting and fun and _______________.  Ions don't get to enjoy feelings, eh? 

i think we all have our kinks, and i think that is (in part) where chemistry is an important factor. For instance, i'm pretty sure i wouldn't have a lot of success in a relationship with a Dominant bottom lol. i'd feel pulled apart because i'd be conflicted by my desire/need to submit, but i'd feel untrue to myself trying to top.  So, i may love that guy, but a relationship with Him would be impractical.  

Those are kinks we would probably each know about ourselves ahead of time, before even getting into relationship. But we're alive and fluid, it's not like we have one standard set of kinks that never get added too. you have a kink/need/desire for piss, your BF didn't have that particular kink, but He has the disposition behind the kink.  Discovering common kinks can be scary, but also exciiting.  i don't think you so much "lead" your boyfriend to use you as a toilet as you introduced Him to that part of yourself (made yourself vulnerable to Him, naked).  When His uses you that way, it's not like He is making a sacrifice to please you, right? Rather, He's discovered a new way to Dom you that He was unaware of before. If He really gets into it, you guys are lucky you have chemistry that way, because your needs are met symbiotically vs one of you trying to compromise to meet the others need. 

i think the only time it becomes an attempt to "lead" is when you use manipulation to try and get your way, regardless of how He is or feels. I.e., if i had a boyfriend that i introduced to piss and i could clearly see that He was not thoroughly loving it, and it was meeting a Dom need in Him, i would not want it.  i'd completely rather give up something like piss than get it by manipulation or Him making some sort of sacrifice. I only want mutual connections with someone, those are the most intense and best, but they are often a matter of discovery. We don't know all those places of connection up front,  i believe that's part of the adventure of relationship. 

[backdoorjimmy]

24 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

i'm pretty feminist (not feminine), and i'm convinced that patriarchy applied universally to male/female has fucked things up, because it doesn't always apply. There are Dom women just like there are Dom men, There are Top women, just like there are Top Men.  i think those things are emotional/psycological dispositions. They may find lots of different expression in sex, but i don't think sex dictates the postions (physical or emotional) we take, but the other way around. 

I consider myself a feminist, too, and I agree with you on the point about universally applying patriarchy messing things up. We see it in every aspect of our lives, but there are definitely top women (dominatrix, etc.). When I think about that dynamic outside of the bedroom, I look no further than my own family. My mother is the most in-charge person I know outside of my grandmother. I also think about strong women leaders who serve in politics and in the military. 

53 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

i don't believe a bottom/subs kinks, needs, desires are a matter of being unsubmissive... i think they are what makes him who He is, and that can get really complex, i know. Like some subs need/want things like to be objectified, bullied, beat up... and some Dom's need/want a sub like that. But i think that is individual expression, not a universal rule. i think the best relationships are based on chemistry. Again, i pull from natural law, opposites attract and bond. But were human, not ions. Our 'electrical charge' charge is much more complex because we have intellect and emotions... which makes the process exciting and fun and _______________.  Ions don't get to enjoy feelings, eh? 

I really like this perspective - it's not that I'm not being submissive, I'm just being what/who I am. That's actually comforting to hear. Not because I'm uncomfortable with what I did, but because it empowers me to stay in the space where I'm most comfortable. The example of natural law (opposites attract) is a good one, though I agree that the dynamic of dom/sub is way more complex than that. In my example, I know what I like in a man. My bf could see what I needed from him on an emotional level and filled that for me. 

58 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

i think we all have our kinks, and i think that is (in part) where chemistry is an important factor. For instance, i'm pretty sure i wouldn't have a lot of success in a relationship with a Dominant bottom lol. i'd feel pulled apart because i'd be conflicted by my desire/need to submit, but i'd feel untrue to myself trying to top.  So, i may love that guy, but a relationship with Him would be impractical.  

lol..I don't think I could get by in a relationship with another total bottom. In a lot of ways, my boyfriend is a dominant bottom, but he let's his inner top come through to keep me satisfied. It's incredible to talk to him sometimes and hear about the previous partners he's had, and how they've all spoiled him in the ways only a top can spoil a bottom. But he's more than comfortable in his role in our relationship, which I'm grateful for. 

1 hour ago, tallslenderguy said:

Those are kinks we would probably each know about ourselves ahead of time, before even getting into relationship. But we're alive and fluid, it's not like we have one standard set of kinks that never get added too. you have a kink/need/desire for piss, your BF didn't have that particular kink, but He has the disposition behind the kink.  Discovering common kinks can be scary, but also exciiting.  i don't think you so much "lead" your boyfriend to use you as a toilet as you introduced Him to that part of yourself (made yourself vulnerable to Him, naked).  When His uses you that way, it's not like He is making a sacrifice to please you, right? Rather, He's discovered a new way to Dom you that He was unaware of before. If He really gets into it, you guys are lucky you have chemistry that way, because your needs are met symbiotically vs one of you trying to compromise to meet the others need. 

It feels so surreal to read it, but it's the truth. I guess I didn't exactly manipulate him into using me as a toilet because if I would have picked up on any discomfort or disgust I would have backed out immediately. I have a need for him (and all men) to want to be with me and around me, and if he would have disapproved I would have been too nervous to try to pressure him into going further. I the beginning, I was excited that he let me hold and aim his dick into the toilet, and I was hopeful that it would lead to me being the toilet. But I was also convinced that it was too good to be true and that at some point he'd put up a barrier that would make us stop short of me opening up for his piss load. 

 

1 hour ago, tallslenderguy said:

I think the only time it becomes an attempt to "lead" is when you use manipulation to try and get your way, regardless of how He is or feels. I.e., if i had a boyfriend that i introduced to piss and i could clearly see that He was not thoroughly loving it, and it was meeting a Dom need in Him, i would not want it.  i'd completely rather give up something like piss than get it by manipulation or Him making some sort of sacrifice. I only want mutual connections with someone, those are the most intense and best, but they are often a matter of discovery. We don't know all those places of connection up front,  i believe that's part of the adventure of relationship. 

In a way, that's where I am with him now. Not using manipulation, but knowing that he's probably on the outer edges of his comfort zone. It's naughty and exciting, but this is where it stops for him. And even though I want to take things to the next level, that would be a step too far for him and has the potential to scare him off. 

[tallslenderguy]

31 minutes ago, backdoorjimmy said:

 

It feels so surreal to read it, but it's the truth. I guess I didn't exactly manipulate him into using me as a toilet because if I would have picked up on any discomfort or disgust I would have backed out immediately. I have a need for him (and all men) to want to be with me and around me, and if he would have disapproved I would have been too nervous to try to pressure him into going further. I the beginning, I was excited that he let me hold and aim his dick into the toilet, and I was hopeful that it would lead to me being the toilet. But I was also convinced that it was too good to be true and that at some point he'd put up a barrier that would make us stop short of me opening up for his piss load. 

 

In a way, that's where I am with him now. Not using manipulation, but knowing that he's probably on the outer edges of his comfort zone. It's naughty and exciting, but this is where it stops for him. And even though I want to take things to the next level, that would be a step too far for him and has the potential to scare him off. 

Exactly lol ❤️ .  Hey, remember, i'm a sub bottom, i understand because of similarities. 

Where i was going with the feminist/Patriarchy comments was that forced Patriarchal standards, in a wrong context, have caused a fuckload of cultural damage.  i believe that forcing all women (whether they be submissive, Dom or somewhere in between) has led to many women adopting manipulation as a survival mechanism.  If a woman is not a submissive and she is in relationship in a culture and with a man who assumes it, it's a way around submitting that doesn't come naturally.  

We're natural submissives, so it would actually violate something in us to manipulate a Man. If you're anything like me, the idea is abhorant and repulsive.  But patriarchy has fucked things up for some of us too. A lot of Dom or Dom leaning guys have also grown up in a culture filled with negative Patriarchal effects. They may associate submissive with manipulative because that's what they've encountered culturally, not understanding that a true submissive has no desire to manipulate.... quite the opposite sometimes at least. For instance, in me, i am opened up and vulnerable to a Man who is intelligent and uses 'grooming' type techniques, which are a form of manipulation.

 Not the same though, i abhor the dishonesty of manipulation i have experienced with women, but adore the sort of manipulation i have experienced with a Man.... probably the same way, and maybe for similar reasons that a Dom man might be repelled by unnatural submission. The grooming i have experienced with a Dom Man is so different from the manipulation i have encountered with a woman. The grooming is subtle, below the radar, but i think the difference is the symbiotic nature... it is Him using me, but it meets a need  in both of us versus robbery and one sidedness. Hard to explain what i feel, but it is so distinct.  i think a lot who identify as Dom think that needs being met has to be one sided for it to be truly a D/s dynamic, but i think the most intense D/s dynamic is where each sides needs just naturally meet the others, even though they are opposite.  Simply put, it is fully a Tops desire to fuck and breed, and it's fully a bottoms desire to be fucked and bred... the needs/desires are opposite, and symbiotic.  

The fun of relationship is finding all the different ways that energy of need and desire can be expressed.  E.g., You and your BF discovered together that He needs a toilet... and you need to be a toilet. There are innumerable examples of how this dynamic can be experienced and waiting to be discovered and explored.