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I have a beginner's question


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Hi guys,

I'm split over raw sex.

On the one hand, I'm sensual, intrigued by crossing the point of no return and carrying the partner's seed, especially if he can impregnate a woman.

On the other hand, a huge majority of guys prefer non-sharing, hierarchical, humiliating sex, which doesn't suits me (yet) because of my violent background.

Would you mind giving me some piece of advice?

Marc

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Well, advice on this kind of thing is worth its weight in gold...

In my not-so-humble opinion (at least on this topic) it is perfectly possible to be highly sensual and to enjoy  "crossing the point of no return and carrying the partner's seed" without even the smallest shred of "non-sharing, hierarchical, humiliating sex" entering the picture.

Furthermore, I disagree that a huge majority of guys prefer the latter. Breeding Zone and sites like it are an extremely unrepresentative sample of men (or gay men) at large.  Even here, there are a few members of this site who revel in wallowing in degradation, and talk about it at great length, but there are many more who simply enjoy the intimacy of bare sex and fluid exchange in an  unapologetic way.

Personally, I love the former and identify with it closely, and find the latter to be a turn-off at best, and repugnant if it gets too crazy.

My advice: "You do you." Know what you want, and what you don't, and what you want to explore more before you form a preference. There is no "should" when it comes to these matters. It is your God-given right (nay, duty!) to have your own reactions and opinions. That doesn't mean you can't listen to and consider those of others, or try them on to see if they fit, but only you can decide what's right in your own life.

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Because of PrEP, I would say the majority of gay sex in major metropolitan areas in the U.S. is bareback nowadays. And that sex comes in all shapes, sizes and flavors. As viking noted, the posts on this site are not representative of most gay sex. Breeding and humiliation are not the same and you can easily have one without the other. Personally I find breeding and being bred liberating and empowering and those are the encounters that I seek out. 

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