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Why is God a filthy cocksucker?


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Guest Fact
Posted

Without a doubt God is a real filthy cocksucker and swallows everyday, especially when he very severely punished many of us very good innocent people for no reason at all.  And he keeps rewarding all of the other low life loser people out there, especially the very evil ones that cause crime and destroy other people lives. WTF is that all about?

Posted
2 hours ago, Guest Fact said:

Without a doubt God is a real filthy cocksucker and swallows everyday, especially when he very severely punished many of us very good innocent people for no reason at all.  And he keeps rewarding all of the other low life loser people out there, especially the very evil ones that cause crime and destroy other people lives. WTF is that all about?

Your a fucking Jack ass... BLASPHEME GOD YOU WILL DIE A MISERABLE DEATH. I know it seems to be he only takes the GOOD people, consider this who would you take ?

  • Haha 2
Posted
12 minutes ago, SissySeanetteCarey said:

Your a fucking Jack ass... BLASPHEME GOD YOU WILL DIE A MISERABLE DEATH. I know it seems to be he only takes the GOOD people, consider this who would you take ?

In today’s world, humankind recognizes and worships over 4800 different deities. Which one is the god you reference?

  • Like 1
Posted
1 hour ago, SissySeanetteCarey said:

Your a fucking Jack ass... BLASPHEME GOD YOU WILL DIE A MISERABLE DEATH. I know it seems to be he only takes the GOOD people, consider this who would you take ?

Every day I go out of my way to tell god to FUCK OFF!! And I have a great life, I make great money have my own house 3 cars 2 motorcycles I'm doing great all without god! I see lots of bible thumpers living shit lives. I guess they don't pray hard enough, either that or there is no god and they are just suckers.  Have a blessed day HAHAHAHAHAHA

  • Like 3
Posted
4 hours ago, SissySeanetteCarey said:

Your a fucking Jack ass... BLASPHEME GOD YOU WILL DIE A MISERABLE DEATH. I know it seems to be he only takes the GOOD people, consider this who would you take ?

Please take this nonsense elsewhere. No one here has time for it. 

  • Like 1
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted (edited)

Let's be real though, God is a fucking [banned word]. Like, he's got Adam there in the Garden of Eden & is like, "Nice. Hot. I'm digging this." Then Adam's like "im' lonely :'(" and God's like "FUCK. Alright, throw me a bone and I'll make ya something nice lol" and then there's Eve.

Then Eve meets a snake & some fruit gets et & the happy couple are like "Holy crap, we're naked 😱." So they cover up just in time for God to walk back in, and that's the first thing he notices. He's like "wtf is this Who told you to put clothes on". Snake's off in the corner like "God u ssstupid bitch" & then God is like "FINE THEN IM TAKING MY GARDEN AND GOING HOME. ENJOY BEING NOT-NAKED YOU TWO. ALSO, ALL THE SUFFERING. Knew I shoulda never planted that fucking tree…"

Then like, 3,000-ish years (plus at least two periods that lasted so long, everyone who was there lost track of time) later, God's like "Jesus, I'm horny, but there's nobody as magnificent as I am that I'd ever wanna fuck. What can I do about this whole situ…WAIT, I think I might have an idea that's just crazy enough to work, and it might even lead to humanity's redemption, or whatever." Nine months later & God becomes the proud, eager father of Himself. & you know Jesus has gotta be taking that Cosmic Daddy Dick on the regular, because that boy ascended to the clouds and, to this day (this is a FACT, you can look it up), he has yet to come back down even once.

Edited by orderthepartysub
I figured it'd be best if bleeped myself
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