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Saturday, 25th November, 2023. I am 32.


Philip

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One. There is a weird dynamic between Kevin and me. He always wants to pay for things, including things that are mine, like my clothes, groceries. I strive for personal independence, especially financially, so we tend to clash. Recently, we have been using AI, ChatGPT, to help settle our debates. It acts as a judge, and we have two rounds to state our cases and rebut each other. The AI’s decision is final. So far, I have been winning.

Two. We have started our gardening adventures together. In the past five weeks, we have planted palm trees, birds of paradise, herbs, and ferns. I visit Kevin on the weekend, and I look forward to seeing how the garden is progressing. Today, I noticed that a new leaf has formed on the bird of paradise, and the herbs are ready to be harvested. Spring is becoming a favorite season of mine, for new growth and opportunities are plentiful here. In Summer, we shall reap our harvest, and I can’t wait for that day to arrive.

Three. We are watching a YouTube channel called Spanian. He is covered in tattoos and makes travel blog videos. Today, he is in District 4 in Vietnam tasting local eats. He stops at a local kebab shop, and we are laughing because that’s anything but local. Then, he stops at a deep-fried shop that sells fried cheese sticks and fried chicken wings, and we shake our heads at how westernized street food has become in Vietnam. If only, we think to ourselves, he had a local Vietnamese guide. Then he would experience the culture more fully.

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re: One:  

Often things like who gets to pay, all of that is culturally based.  I think it's based on a sense of wanting to do things for the other guy that aren't part of the relationship.  Maybe Kevin fits that bill?  Maybe generosity is just in his nature?  Maybe he gets a kick out of "taking care" of you?  If you two can sort of "split-the-bill", with you allowing him to do what he apparently loves to do occasionally, and you doing stuff for him in the same vein, it would at least mean an agreement (if not complete acceptance) of the roles has been achieved?  I hope you two work this out - might not be as tough as it seems.  

I had no idea A.I. could be used as you describe, but the operative word is "artificial", right?  I suppose it can be a useful arbitration tool, but nothing is more effective than sitting down and having a heart-to-heart conversation about whatever the issue is.  I'm sure you're well-able to be the gracious "winner" in the A.I. wars too.  

re: Two:

Obviously, I'm not familiar with the vegetation in your area, but do watch out for the ferns.  Turn your back for an eyeblink or two, and they'll spread like crazy.  If you planted Areca's, get the seed-pods cut out as soon as you see them.  Those damn seeds will sprout and you'll wind up with 100x more palm trees than you want.  That applies to any type of palm, but Areca's are the worst.  Just like we rawfuckers - they're determined to spread their seed everywhere they can.  

re: Three:

Sounds like an interesting pass-time.  Much more productive than the news around the world these days ... 

 

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You are spot on @hntnhole in your observation! He does get a kick out of "taking care" of me by wanting to pay for things, which I am still getting comfortable with. He is indeed very generous and we are still working on striking that very fine balance between him overindulging me and my own confidence in financial independence. It's been super fun using technology, especially AI, to help settle some of our debates--AI has really advance considerably in the past year or so!

Two. We have indeed planted Areca's palm, but it is quite isolated in a planter box away from the main garden. I would love to see it spread like wildfire amongst the planter box as it is looking a bit bare(back) at the moment, but I'm hoping that I don't regret it later, as you said. 

Great to hear from you! 

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and a verrrrrry good morning, Philip

I have a stand of Arecas against the back wall of my yard, and I hope that container yours are planted in is of foot-thick concrete !!!  As far as I know, they're the only type of palm that will send out new growth off the sides of more mature growth.  But, they're reflective of the property-owner, in that they shower their seed everywhere they can, and they don't use rubbers either.  

In the meantime, I wish you all the best as you and Kevin deal with the finer points of the relationship.  Sounds like "a keeper" to me .... 

😉

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