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UnsureAboutThis

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Everything posted by UnsureAboutThis

  1. UnsureAboutThis
    I'm hoping to make it to your gathering sometime
  2. UnsureAboutThis
    I first had condom-less sex 5 years ago when my fuck buddy convinced me to take his cock bare. It wasn't much later that he convinced me to hook up with other guys and let them fuck me bare. Then he convinced me to let him cum in me. Once he started cumming in me it was like it changed me so I wanted the other guys I hooked up with to cum in me too but I was always careful to vet them, as best I could, to make sure they were negative. About a year ago I took my first poz undetectable load. At this point, I've taken 10 undetectable loads. About 4 months ago I took an unknown load. Since then I've taken 3 more unknown loads. Now I want to take a poz detectable load just to see what that's like. I don't want to end up HIV + but I feel like I need to experience taking a poz load just to feel what it's like. I'm not on prep because I don't tolerate it well and I know that the chance of getting infected the first or second time taking a poz load is low so I really want to do this. I think I'll be able to stop after taking a poz load or two. Have any of you gone down a similar path? How do you deal with the crazy desires?
  3. UnsureAboutThis
    Keep us posted. Thanks.
  4. UnsureAboutThis
    I guess I was pretty naive because I did not know that Vaseline would make a condom fail. My buddy must have known that because the first few times he fucked me. I made him wear a condom and he somehow always managed to sneak his load in me. I think the Vaseline was the catalyst. He would always push in deep just before he came so the condom would break and he would get past my second sphincter which means his cum did not drip out of me right away. Hours later I would have some leakage and when I questioned him about it he said it was probably just the Vaseline that now got heated up by my body and was running out of me. That was my entry into barebacking. Looking back, I don't regret it at all. As a matter of fact, it really turns me on.
  5. UnsureAboutThis
    Davidevil 🦊 @davidevil666xxx
    Maybe it IS your nephew. 😳
  6. UnsureAboutThis
    I guess I should have asked earlier, are you on prep and do you take it regularly?
  7. UnsureAboutThis
    Definitely get tested but prepare yourself for the results. If you were not looking to convert and think you may now be HIV+ make sure you have a support network in place to help you deal with this emotionally.
  8. UnsureAboutThis
    It's been enlightening reading this section. VerbalBTTM, you write eloquently. I experienced and lived through some of the events you touched on. You were able to capture not just the pain we went through but also the things that gave us hope and strength. Because of rising use of sex apps and social media as well as the decline in places for gay men to meet, I don't know that the younger generation will ever understand nor appreciate much of what we lived through.
  9. UnsureAboutThis
    I created my profile back in 2022 and mostly forgot about it until about 6 months ago. I came here mostly to read the articles and look at the hot pictures. Recently I started posting a few comments to articles but never formally introduced myself, so here goes. In the span of 3 years, when I first created my profile, I moved from scared of bb sex to embracing it. Also, I started out using this site trying to figure out why someone would be a chaser but in the process of trying to figure that out I discovered that I am turned on by the idea of taking a poz load and now I'm at the point that I want to try it just to see what it's like. Unfortunately there aren't many poz men in my area to help me with that.
  10. UnsureAboutThis
    I agree with what you said and share your sentiment. I am following enough news to stay informed but try not to get wrapped up in it emotionally. I write letters to Congress, march in organized protests and do what I can to keep our country from sinking under the current administration's leadership. I will check out the podcast you mentioned.
  11. UnsureAboutThis
    I'm naturally smooth which is not what guys want these days. 🫤 As far as what turns me on, I like a guy that's solid/beefy who walks with confidence (but not arrogance) who displays his bulge proudly. I'm open with regard to age but tend to like guys within 10 years of my own age.
  12. UnsureAboutThis
    Thanks for all the information. I'm probably just going to stay off prep entirely and play selectively. I really want to have some fun with a poz guy because everyone says it's such a different experience because of the risk factor. I'm weighing the risk against the desire and I am willing to take the risk for the experience. I'm hoping that after I try it a couple of times that I'll be ready to move on but I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. It might be months or years before I find an unmedicated poz guy to play with so this might all be a moot point.
  13. UnsureAboutThis
    I'm currently not on any prep or other meds so all my kidney numbers are in the normal range. I'm healthy and happy with the exception of the strong desire to take at least one poz load just to have the experience.
  14. UnsureAboutThis
    Thanks for all the advice. I'll have to check it out and also check if my health insurance will cover it. They often will not cover the newer (non-generic) formulations.
  15. UnsureAboutThis
    I think I may be one of those people who just cannot take prep. This has been my challenge with trying to figure out how I can take a poz load just to see what it's like and still stay safe as possible.
  16. UnsureAboutThis
    I've taken it for up to 26 days but was having headaches, nausea, diarrhea, night sweats, sleep disturbances, various rashes so I decided to just stop taking it and all of those cleared up pretty quickly. I went in and talked to my doctor. They did a blood draw and found my kidney values way off so he advised me not to take anymore until we could figure out a better course of action.
  17. UnsureAboutThis
    I'm thinking that I may try the 2-1-1 method. I can put up with side effects for a few days when I know I'm going to have risky sex. It's not just the diarrhea, headaches, rash, sleep disturbances that prep induces in me, it also throws my kidney values way off. So with all of this in mind, I'm thinking of just going without prep and taking a couple of poz loads just for the experience. I know the risk factor is low with that so I think that's probably my best bet.
  18. UnsureAboutThis
    I tried Truvada and Descovy and have had bad reactions to them. Basically every side effect they list, I get with a vengeance. I'm finding that I really want to take a poz load just to experience it. I know the chance of me getting pozzed in a single (maybe 2) loads in minimal but what if I find I like taking poz cock. So I'm thinking of trying prep again but doing it 3 times a week to see if I can tolerate that. My question is, is prep effective if I'm only taking half of the prescribed dosage?
  19. UnsureAboutThis
    I say give him what he wants! What you both want!
  20. UnsureAboutThis
    I am beginning to recognize that I'm on the journey now myself. It scares me because I feel like I'm losing control because the bug is in my brain now and visiting this site only seems to make it stronger.
  21. UnsureAboutThis
    Do you seek out poz guys now?
  22. UnsureAboutThis
    At this point we all know he wants it but it's just trying to be a "good boyfriend" by saying that he doesn't want it. I say give it to him and let him sort it out.
  23. UnsureAboutThis
    I think if I try a couple of poz loads that will scratch the itch and I'll be able to move on. In your estimation, is this realistic?
  24. UnsureAboutThis
    I started out always insisting on condoms when I got fucked. Eventually I allowed my regular guy to fuck me bare but I told him that he had to pull out to cum. I went on prep but had too many issues with it so I had to drop off it. After recognizing that he only fucked me and his girlfriend, I changed and allowed him to cum in me. After a while I really started to feel the need for dick in me and since he wasn't always available when I felt the need to get fucked I began seeking others who liked to fuck bareback but I didn't allow them to cum in me. Eventually, the need to "get fucked" became the need to "get bred' so I started letting guys who fuck me breed me but I was always careful to check their status and only meet with guys who were negative and\or on prep. After a while, that caution melted away so I no longer checked or cared about status. Fast forward, now I allow any guys who fuck me to breed me. I accept all loads but, as far as I know, I've never taken a detectable poz load. Here's the thing, lately I'm feeling like I want, or maybe even need, to knowingly take a toxic poz load. I know getting pozzed is rare, if not impossible, on a first or second load so I think I need to give it a go. What are your thoughts?
  25. UnsureAboutThis
    I think you are on a journey of self-discovery. Enjoy it.

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