NiceHard1

where are you?

I would love to see us post more travel listings on the regional pages here (If that is cool with RT.)

Guys often will post when traveling places looking for sex venue advice, but also maybe we could have guest hosting wanted or offered postings there too - with or without sex as part of the offer.

Everyone draws his line in the sand at a different place. My ex would never even have casual/anonymous sex - he thinks that alone is risky. My line is certainly much farther out than his, but not as far as yours. Doesn't mean my ex is wrong, or I am wrong or you are wrong.

I think how we set the line should be based on the potential for serious harm to ourselves or others. Of course even that may be grey - some would think that barebacking with a poz guy can cause harm. I get concerned about guys who chem and then have difficulty finding the line that they would otherwise have set for themselves if they were not chemed. Try to have a "designated driver" around who can help make sure everyone stays safe - or at least as safe as they are trying to be.

Wet is pretty nice, and also close to the gay leather bar/hotel - the Laird, which is a fun place to stay and hang out.

http://www.wetonwellington.com.au/

http://www.lairdhotel.com/

You've got the physical stuff down, but also a few suggestions for the overall experience: Parties can sometimes be hit or miss. In a place where lots of guys know each other already, some may just flock to who they already know, while others may be interested in the new meat.

Get excited about going, relax, and be yourself, and you'll do great. If you go expecting to get 8 loads and don't, you'll leave disappointed; but if you go to be able to get naked and sexy with a bunch of guys and then get even one or two loads, its a great night.

sorry, I couldn't resist!

best place to get fucked

In the ass!

Has anyone checked out: http://www.gay-ville.com/

It looks like a carbon copy of airbnb, only gay. I've looked through it before but not yet tried it out.

I personally like the BBRT feature of entering your zip code as an identifier. Even in a big city like NY, a zip code is a small enough geographic area to "ball park" when looking for someone near you, but not so specific to be an invasion of privacy. The only thing that I don't like about BBRT is that you need to figure out what your zip code is if you are traveling and don't know it. So it might be nice to have a look up feature where someone could type their address, which would not be entered or displayed, but only used to obtain the zip code.

Didn't you at one time display member locations on a map on this site? I liked that feature here!

You never really know how you feel about it until it becomes a reality. Yes, it will take some time to adjust, but you will.

I recommend learning as much as you can about HIV, if you don't already have a thorough knowledge of it, as its important to come to terms with it and you, as the two of you now will need to live together for a very long time.

I recommend reading the three guides from project inform for newly diagnosed people. You can read them online in PDF format, or can order a print version:

http://www.projectinform.org/hivhealth/

I think that is really great that you have told regular partners who you know. This is certainly important if you have topped some of them, though even those who top you may be interested in knowing, even though a lower risk to them. As you can see, there is always a wealth of advise and people to talk with here.

again, to reiterate, you'll be fine.

Well-said, and great discussion.

MSM is the preferred term used by public health and medical fields to identify exactly that - men having sex with men - specifically since many msm do not identify as gay, bi, queer, or any other collective community term.

All-male is similarly a good term for an establishment that wants to welcome all men, without regard to how people identify themselves. I find it interesting that all-male can sometimes imply a gay following, or could also be used to imply male but not gay.

But regarding the book - I do think that it is really gay men who identify with the term barebacking, as an intentional choice for having sex. Some stigmatize it as wrong, or taboo, while others of us glamorize it; Either way, it is only the gay world that has created the hype around it. I don't think that straight men, even those having sex with other men (without condoms), think about the terminology for what they are doing, as they just consider it the normal way of having sex. I think it highlights the double standard. Look at porn - straight porn does not identify itself as "bareback" or "safer sex" - it just is what it is - and that is usually sans latex.

Language is a powerful tool. And it is great to think about how we use it.

I've shared rooms before, and it can become a fun weekend. I'd be open to ideas with one or more

.... Be clean dd free

Topper - sorry that I had not seen your message to reply then, but if I may offer a comment: I respect and agree with talking about STD screening habits with guys, and having a harm reduction strategy, though I challenge you to consider using different terminology. If you are trying to sero-sort, and prefer only HIV neg guys, please say exactly that. "Clean" and "disease free" can sound offensive to the many HIV poz guys who are on this site. I'm sure that is not your intention to offend, and hope you will consider alternative words to get the same point across.

Check out butt boy - conundrum - I have a few of his recordings - they are great for fucking

I've done massage to them too

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/conundrum/id5036799

You may be able to try to get a high sensitivity test, which can detect HIV within a shorter window period.

If your friend has gone for some initial HIV viral load tests, and he shares the results with you, that might give you a better idea, or may just further make you anxious. Yes, its possible you may have controverted, though not a forgone conclusion. But if you have, know that there are lots of us here who have gone the road before you; Lots of our friends and brothers who have worked their asses off over the past 30 years to make things better for us all. Especially if you are in SF - I found out myself while living in SF, and there is probably no better place for support. Lots of us here on this site to talk to as well. Sure, its not the greatest thing in the world to have to deal with, but not the worst ether.

You'll be fine either way.

If you are out for anon, no questions asked fucking, then it can be a challenge to avoid, and my only suggestion would be to go frequently for testing.

But if frequent STIs frustrate you, I would recommend a harm reduction strategy, which could be as simple as a few casual questions with your prospective sex partners:

-Ask guys their HIV status, even if you don't care if they are poz or neg; A guy who doesn't go for HIV tests probably doesn't go for other STI tests either;

-Ask when his last STI test was, and exchange contact info, so that you should contact each other should something come up after the fact; I always appreciate a call from partners, and also like to let people know if I discover something.

-Causally start with a little making out and foreplay before your mouth or butt takes his cock. While you're moving south, causally check out the equipment. If you notice a sore, you might want to make a casual departure from the situation.

-Most importantly, get tested frequently, and take care of things if they happen.

Always important to be yourself. People will appreciate you more for being who you are than trying to be who you are not. Not to say that you should not explore and try things new, but sometimes good to do that in a comfortable safe situation. Your first sentence really says a lot about yourself - in a very good way.

There is no need to even disclose. Insurance rules even prevent a company from tying individual names to medications that are funded through the program

Also, if the guy is undetectable, its unlikely he may poz you. Could have you been fucked bare by other guys in the recent weeks?

Otherwise, I agree - could be cold/flu - it is that season

I've been reading that ironically, life expectancy of people with HIV actually exceeds the life expectancy of those without HIV. Pretty funny! The logic behind that is that in many cases, gay men tend to live a more healthy lifestyle than their heterosexual male counterparts. And so it is not really the HIV that increases the life expectancy, but the coincidence that many with HIV are also gay and practice healthy living.

http://www.aidsmap.com/Life-expectancy-now-considerably-exceeds-the-average-in-some-people-with-HIV-in-the-US/page/2816267/

Relax and take your time. Be sure to be with tops who know how to break you in gently

I agree on diet-

High fiber. Lots of good vegetables and fruit - broccoli, kale, high fiber cereal.

There are several cereals that are very high in fiber (40%-67% daily allowance) - they typically have psyllium husk as an ingredient. You can also buy psyllium at health food stores- either in pill form or in powder. You can add the powder form to you oatmeal or cereal. Read the instructions and take with good amounts of water or liquid to be sure it gets into your digestive system

Slip -

ANy result?

I too was thinking probably syphillis. Def something to check out

I agree - great to meet someone who you are on the same page with about your sexual desires. Communicate well on how to set up the relationship - how sex together, separately, and with others works best for you, and I think it is entirely possible.

I am always open to any; I usually top younger guys, but I am totally open to having younger guys fuck me as well