badjujuboy

19 minutes ago, BootmanLA said:

Not saying you (or anyone else) should stick with a relationship if you (or he) doesn't want to.

I'm just saying that a relationship can be built on things other than sex, and that it can be preferable to be partnered with no remaining sexual interest (and getting whatever sex one wants elsewhere) rather than being single. Maybe not in your case, and that's fine. 

@BootmanLA Thanks for this... I'm interested in the range of thoughts on relationships that move towards no sex.  My post may definitely appear jaded but that is my thought on this. Perhaps it will change. After all, it’s only been two years. Rereading my post, I should have stated that my response about splitting finances was something I've said in the past but, as in today's conversation, I just listened without a response which got me thinking about different views.

13 minutes ago, barebackbro said:

I don't want to be blunt, but you don't seem to  place much store in love, @badjujuboy. Your post seems to suggest that a partner = roommate + sex, without any emotional element.

@barebackbro If it seems to be that I didn't add an emotional element to my post. It's because I equate those emotions as being a de facto part of the relationship... without the emotional element, there would simply be a sexual relationship which I have been in too.

16 minutes ago, BootmanLA said:

I think it depends on the length and depth of the relationship.

Two years in? Yeah, I'd say call it quits, move on, and try to find something that fits better.

Ten years in? It's not necessarily just intertwined financials. It's shared pets, shared experiences, shared traditions, not to mention deep affection that goes beyond sex. Just like married straight couples sometimes stay together even if sex has waned, gay couples can do that too.

The point is that gay relationships, being already somewhat transgressive, don't have to stick with the same rules as other people's. The relationship can be based on, and include or exclude, any factors the participants wish.

One thing to remember is that as we age, the number of potential relationship partners may well decline just as the number of potential sexual partners declines. If the pools of both are shrinking, the chances of finding someone who's a member of both pools can be a lot tougher. So ditching someone who's otherwise a great relationship partner in hopes of finding someone else who's both a great relationship partner AND a good sexual outlet may not be the best bet some people can make.

@BootmanLA I guess I misrepresented my current relationship.  Everything is fine in mine and we were (and have in the past) discussed this topic.  It's just the fact that I was speaking with a friend today and it came out that hasn't had sex with his husband for a long time... we're talking years. I had another tell me it had been seven at the time in the past.  I just find it hard to imagine that part being nonexistent. Thus, I'm ok with being single if I can't have that. As you said: gay relationships are already somewhat transgressive and don't have to stick with the same rules as other people's.

I thought I'd get some perspectives on long-term relationships and sex.  I've been in a great relationship for a couple of years now... actually the longest I've ever been in. One thing that I've experienced is talking with guys who have been in long-term relationships (10+ years) and most of the guys end up saying they are no longer sexually intimate with their husbands, partners, etc. My bf and I have begun to talk about this fact. As I've said to my friends in the past, I can't imagine being in a relationship that does not include sex and don't see myself ever changing that.

I'm wondering what others might think about coming to terms with no sex relationships. Would you continue in it and find your needs somewhere else or end it? Quite a few times, I've been the one that has been sought out by the one who still needed sex. I would ask them why they continue on in the relationship. I get the "cause our finances are mixed" and such to which my response has always been "Split the finances and get out. Why settle? I don't need a roommate." 

On 8/31/2022 at 11:53 AM, alwaysready said:

one of my hottest sexual experience was a one off around noon the first day of the card's baseball season. i had taken the afternoon off and a guy i met came over. we had great sex, with him on top; it was a hot day, the windows were open and drops of his sweat started to ping on my face and body. i don't remember much else about the sex, other than it was good; but i will never forget how much i enjoyed that sweat shower.

Mixed with scent of a sweaty crotch and I’d be totally in his control.

On 9/27/2022 at 5:04 PM, cuminfrombehind said:

“ I'vehad my share of a lot of pussy, and my occupation has me in charge of people and things...
It's almost like I want to remove myself from that world temporarily and completely submit to cock..“

The above is a big tell. There is the trope of those in power seeking to relinquish their power and ultimately be the sexually submissive one… It’s what you’re looking for:  “remove myself from that world temporarily.”   I can relate to a certain extent. At work, I’m in charge and call the shots but in the “bedroom” I’m the opposite. As others have said… sexuality is a spectrum and you seem to have moved along it. You need to examine your feelings and work through them.  

My ultimate… getting the boots off a motorcycle cop after he fucks me. 

Still can remember my first time… the top grabbed my face and squeezed.  I knew what was coming and I instinctively opened up and accepted the gob. I didn’t think twice…

10 hours ago, NLbear said:

I never touch my cock when I'm being fucked. I cum handsfree quite a lot. Usually when I'm fucked on my back but also doggie (my fav).

Anal orgasms are rare but have happened. 

This pretty much… the most explosive hands free was my first …although not anal… the top was fucking me while on my back and I was rubbing my spread sweat and lubed slicked thighs the whole time while keeping my hands off my cock. Suddenly, I felt the most intense feeling and came while still semi-hard. 

Totally into getting rimmed. My most memorable experience was meeting a guy upstairs in a bar. He saw me and spread his legs and showed me his cock.  I dropped to my knees and began sucking him off. Next thing I know he turns me around and unbuckles my jeans. Now at this point I’m leaning over the railing looking down expecting to be fucked. Next thing I know I’m feeling his tongue working my cunt and I’m going crazy as I’m trying to act like I’m just looking  over the crowd downstairs drinking a beer. After about 20 minutes of him eating me out, he stands up and starts fingering me and tells me I’m ready and it’s time we go to his place.  It was a fuck I never forgot.

15 hours ago, RawPlug said:

I got confused with the hanky code as I’ve always struggled to tell left from right 😉. Would it be something else to baffle me?

Do what I do… raise your hands up in front of you… palms facing out and stick  your thumbs out. Your left hand makes an “L”   😀

I would take stuff like this with a grain of salt. The media seems to over exaggerate things like this… for instance there is a story out about the FDA warning about cooking chicken with NyQuil. WTF?!!  
 

Though, I can imagine them handing out eggplant and peach stickers as you’re getting on the ship for a gay cruise. 

I had one Daddy that never fucked me. It was always me between his thighs sucking his cock. TBH, I never really thought about him fucking me. It was always about me servicing his cock and that it was  how he wanted things to be. Now if he had suddenly stopped or severely limited the fucking, I would be confused. Though I wouldn’t have known how to react to that.

I have to admit I’ve only had the basic dildos and metal balls in my cunt. I did hook up with a guy who ended up babbling about how he missed his top and … to make him shut up…I shoved a cucumber in him since I’m a bottom and didn’t realize he was also until I was at his place. Though, a nice piece of thick linked chain always made me want to try it. 

10 hours ago, rawsneakerfreak said:

 I ready miss going to clubs, party's or pride events (which he doesn't like) and explained this to my partner but it get shut down quickly alway end of topic with him. Sex isn't that brilliant between us recently, so rarely that I get bred these day which gives me a feeling of emptiness. I tried a few times to rise my feelings and concerns but he doesn't want to talk about it. My real concern is that one day I might be over come with my feelings end up meeting up with a random guy to breed me which in a close relationship would be wrong to do as I don't want to cheat on him but I do want to be who I am. 

I’ve always wondered why two people who aren’t completely happy in their relationship… monogamous or otherwise… stay together… some to the point of not having sex for years. I’ve had guys who I’ve had sex with tell me they remain in the relationship because all their finances are tied together.  BTW, I’ve heard this from straight couples too. For me, I’d rather be alone if it comes to that. When it comes down to me or someone else’s happiness, mine comes first.

Right-handed here but will sometimes switch hands at times mid-j/o. It would also depend if I’m with someone and we both are stroking: if he’s on my left,  will use my right hand… if he’s on my right, will use my left. TBH, now I have think about what I’d do if I was in the middle of two guys.  😀

I used to frequent a bar close to my place. The bartender was straight but was always cool with the gays. One night we started talking and cock size came up after a few drinks. It was obvious that I had checked out his bulge… not very much… he laughed and said “I’m a grower, not a shower.”  Later that night I got a text from him asking if I wanted to come back to the bar while he closed up for a few drinks. I was there in a few and let me in. He went behind the bar and dropped his pants and underwear and started stroking as I had a drink.    Damn if he was right… a nice thick 8 inches that I sucked off regularly until the got married and moved away.

3 hours ago, slutbtm1 said:

So question for you guys…

I’ve been debating dabbling with trying to pnp as it sounds pretty fucking fun. But gotta ask. What’s it feel like and how likely is it that I’d get hooked?

I’m experienced with substances (blow, k, shrooms, g, weed) but have always kept a hard line with Tina. Can I flex it, have fun, and let it be a one time thing?or am I gonna crave it and wanna do it all the time?

I’m going to give you my truth and it applies only to me. I’ve done those others things you mentioned as well. I enjoy T but have been able to keep it as something that doesn’t dominate my life. Yet, I do have my limits as well in what I am willing to try. You need to decide where you draw the line.

The rush is incredible and it allowed me to explore the cuntboy I was while allowing me to reduce the inhibitions I had. But again, that was my experience and I don’t pretend that would be another’s experience.

On 8/1/2022 at 10:05 AM, Close2MyBro said:

Why would you be in a relationship that isn't sexually satisfying? You really need to move on and find someone who's more compatible with your needs. So many people stay in miserable relationships when they're really no reason to do so.

Definitely. At one point years ago when I went in to have a physical, I spoke with my doc about my lack of sex drive with my bf. My testosterone levels were normal. That’s when I realized it wasn’t me and I ended it with him. My issue was fixed.

On 6/7/2022 at 11:46 AM, starboard said:

Love playing with older men here. Honestly a majority of my better sexual experiences have been with them. Pretty piggy if you get me with the right guy and a lot of older men can match my energy. 

Some of my best experiences were with older men. I went through a period in my early 20s when I exclusively played with men in their late 40s/50s/60s. They taught me a lot about sex and helped bring out the cuntboy in me.

Love loads of cum filling my cunt but definitely enjoy drinking piss and then being able to recycle it back by either drinking it again or letting my bf drink his piss after it’s gone through me.

A conversation is definitely in order. As @ellentonboy said, there are warning signs. You need to figure out what is acceptable for you in a relationship and prioritize that. I have seen many couples where one of them has “settled.” To me, I refuse to settle. 

The FFDaddy that introduced me to fisting always insisted his boys be  completely smooth. 

2 hours ago, on2thenxt87 said:

Being in a LTR, especially a monogamous one, can be very challenging. However, I also feel like if we did an open situation I would probably be super jealous or insecure. I feel like I have known so many couples that do an open situation too quick in the relationship and everything just turns to shit, but I have also met some great couples who seem to know how to make it work. I think it would have to be a don't ask, don't tell situation. I do wish that I could at least play with other guys while I was doing the long distance thing because the sexual frustration is totally real for me right now. I get by though by keeping things virtual and anonymous, which I don't consider chats and shit cheating, and that helps quite a bit.

It definitely can be a challenge. I was involved with a couple a few years ago. While it was great when the three of us played, there were times when I would get together with one of them without the other knowing. It all came to a head when the other realized the attraction we had and it ended after the one who I wasn't seeing on the side fucked me and then said they needed to leave. I never did find out if he knew we saw each other on the side.

My BF and I have been together for about over two years. We're both on PrEP and enjoy barebacking. I'm a total bottom and he is versatile but has his "bottom needs" that I can't fulfill. What's funny is that I met him on here. He messaged me about my first story. From the beginning, we had lots of discussions on what we wanted out of a relationship and found what works for us. The one thing we've both learned a long time ago was to distinguish the difference between having sex and emotional attachments. We do have a Daddy that we see occasionally which we met after we began seeing each other. I can service both of them and my BF can get his "fill" too. We may play separately, but it's rare and will usually play together. I love seeing him take a cock. We both travel for work, though less during the pandemic, and have the understanding that we are free to enjoy ourselves during that time with others as long as we're responsible and aware of our surroundings. We're also lucky to both have doctors that we can openly talk to about any concerns we may have.