Sub-Cocksucker

It kinda slowly became more and more undeniable to me, but hit me in a couple stages. First, I was 19, a virgin, had some fun with a few girls, but no penetrative sex. I was pretty much force fed my first cock when I was 19, drunk at a party in the woods. It fucked with my head alot, but weeks later, I was actively looking for another hookup. From the day I was fed that first cock, the thought of actually perusing a girl to fuck never entered my head enough to do it. Let me be clear (im a bit odd in this way) I am very attracted to females, I am not attracted to men (few exceptions with black men) BUT, I LOVE COCK. I cant explain it, I love taking cock, being used, degraded, humiliated, by older DOM men. So, the next few years I spent all my spare time and sexual energy focused mainly on sucking guys off. Then in my mid 20s I was used and trained by my first TRUE dom, that lasted a couple years, and he BROKE me. Lets just say he taught me my place, i am 1000% sub. To this day, I am a virgin as far as females. I do regret this some, again, I find them attractive, but I cant fathom fucking one. And the last year or so, I think due to conditioning, I have a hard time getting hard at all. So I will remain a virgin for life, with an uncontrollable urge to please cock. How much of it is from my own choice, and how much of it is due to conditioning,? and how much of it is due to me being so sub, that I feel I deserve to me used, I dont deserve to ever fuck a girl.?

I feel compelled to admit I still cant stop doing this. I still lick and suck and cum out of used condoms I find. Part of me is glad I dont find them often, part of me,,,, wishes I found them EVERYwhere. Ive eaten my own cum for a very long time now, most I have saved up was about 35 loads before I drank it down. Few weeks ago, I had an intrusive thought pop in my head, I wanted to see what I would do... I started cumming in condoms any time I masturbated, and tossed them in a drawer. The very next day after doing it once, it was all I could do NOT to eat it the very next day. I forced myself to do it for a week, so I had 6 condoms at the end of the week, I opened the drawer and could small the condoms (the smell of cum drives me CRAZY, but condoms trigger me also) Obviously the first few condoms were now stale. I picked the first one up, thought to myself, come on, this is ridiculous, im not really gonna eat this. I untied the condom and smelled it, yes, stale cum, it triggered me so badly, I frantically sucked the cum out, and then the other 5 that i had. I chuckled to myself, thinking, that I have most likely sucked the cum out of condoms much older then 6 days. Im starting to scare myself (not the first time) Ive been thinking about seeing if I can get people to mail me cum. from,,, "other" sources also.

Anyone?

Anyone know any good stories written from the DOMs perspective? Preferably older Dom men using and training younger subs.

First a quick background about me. For stead my first cock when I was 19 it changed me forever addicted to cock ever since. Had my first true Dom in my mid twenties which lasted about a year. Pretty much completely broke me and threw me down the sub rabbit hole. Had some on and off relationships with other dogs over the years and sucked off crazy amount of strangers cocks. Now in my mid 40s I have two Doms that I service on a very regular basis. I would never get hard while being penetrated but what always get hard while sucking cock. I have noticed that especially being used as often as I am between my current two doms, that my balls will slowly ooooze and empty (ive never full on CAME from anal) Once they send me home, my balls are empty, but Im still HORNEY, but alot of the times could not jerk off, since I would stay limp. One of my current Doms hates when I get hard, and any time I barely get hard he will beat and squeeze me balls till im limp again. He has been very strict about this for about 6 months now, and lately, I cant get hard at all. I am, well, was, a chronic masturbator, so I have mixed feelings about this. Its frustrating, but I cant help but also be turned on by the thought that, these Doms could have conditioned me to be this way? I honestly dont think its a case of simple ED, has anyone else experienced this? Have I actually been conditioned and trained to be so sub that I now stay limp?

I was at a party in the woods, a bit drunk, i walked away from the fire on a trail, older man mid 50s came up to me with his cock out, pushed me back against a tree then down to my knees. Shoved his cock in my face and said yea come on suck that cock faggot. I resisted a bit, he slapped me then rubbed his cock on my face more and next thing I know its in my mouth. I was in shock, both with what was happening, and the fact that I put up very little fight. I dont think i really even sucked it much, it was more him jerking off in my mouth. he came in my mouth, which i swallowed some of, and walked off. It messed with my head alot, I lasted a couple weeks before I was online hunting for another cock. Looking back, it might have been a cruising spot? never saw him or anyone there again though the couple times I went back.

So, I am a total and complete sub, have never topped or penitrated anyone in my life. Was force fed a cock when I was 19,, I have never been the same since. I LOVE to suck cock more than anything, and I swear I have a g spot in my throat. Had my first TRUE DOM in my early 20s, he broke me. Then in my early 40s had a couple other regular doms. Anyway, ever since with my first dom in my 20s, I have been put into sub head space often. The older I get, and more I am put in my place and used, the deep in sub head space I get, and the more easily it seems to be triggered. Its to the point now where it will linger long after I have left a doms place. And there are times I will randomly get horny, and just start falling into it some, which makes me end up getting out dildos and deep throating them (thats been part of my masturbation for years now) And once Im deep throating a toy, its over, I fall into sub head space, and Im there most the day, if I had intended on doing anything productive that day, theres no chance anymore. I have had sessions with doms that I dont remember some of, I have been told I seem like Im drugged at times. Would love to hear how other subs experience this, how deep you fall into it, what triggers it, what its made you end up doing.

Ive done this several times, but one time really sticks out. My dom took me to another guys place, (not uncommon) and there was a young tiny twink boy there and his "daddy" The boy was in bondage, bar between ankles, and wrists strapped there as well, on the bed. I was put on my knees at the foot of the bed and instructed to eat the boys ass and get it ready. Then I sucked both the men hard, told me to get them good and wet, that it was the only lube the boy was getting. They both then took turns fucking the boys hole, each time one would pull out and swap, I was to suck his cock. This went on for well over an hour, I was dieing to be fucked myself, and they knew it. Finally they both unloaded in his ass, I sucked them both clean, then ate the boys ass, literally sucking the cum out of it. It left me so horny and frustrated, my dom took me home and dropped me off. My dom said he loved seeing me be jealous of the boy, wanting their cocks, and then said, be honest, you were still happy just to taste his ass on our cocks, werent you? ... yes sir.

^^^^ A dirty restroom with dirty old man cock is about as good as it gets. I have sucked off sooooo many random men at cruising spots (and years ago a gloryhole several nights a week) Many of these men were much older than me, and had dirty cocks, It grossed me out, and made me ashamed at first for quite a while, especially considering I couldnt stop doing it. after a while, honestly,, I preferred old dirty dick. Im not sure why, I think part of it is my submissiveness, and how it makes me feel put in my place. Sucking cock at a local park cruising spot eventually led to be sucking off homeless men. About a year of sucking homeless then led to me actively seeking out homeless camps. There are plenty of times I am still grossed out, and ashamed, but, I can NOT stop.

Little backstory on me. Sucked my first cock at 19, was instantly hooked, had my first DOM in mid 20s, he broke and trained me. I started to experience alot of time in "sub headspace" when with him. Fast forward to today, I am in my mid 40s, used quite often, very far down the rabbit hole. I dont CUM when fucked, but it will ooooooooze out of me while I am soft the entire time till my balls are completely emptied. Once I am used and sent home, I cant seem to snap out of sub headspace, and I am still horny as hell. I will aggressively beat off, trying to get hard and cum, but I cant, The rare times I can cum there is barely any, since its been fucked out of me already, and Im STILL left horny and in that state of mind. Not uncommon for me to fall asleep with a dildo in my ass, and another not far from my mouth from deepthroating it. And there are lots of times, I end up playing with toys, not really due to being horny, but.. hard to explain, being in that sub headspace, I just feel like there NEEDS to be something in my holes. I feel like this is similar to what I have seen described from those in chastity, always horny but with pent up cum. But I wonder how the sub headspace situation is like for them? There is horny,,, and then theres sub headspace. Would love to hear it anyone else has similar experiences, how sub headspace effects them, how often you are in it, what triggers it for you.

Restrooms trigger me instantly, to the point its akward for me to use them. I can NOT use urinals, I cant stand next to another man at one, I HAVE to look and see if I can see their cocks," This has got me yelled at more than once. I am also in the closet, but I have been caught and exposed several times in restrooms. Ive had bold men see me looking and ask me if I wanted it, I DROP to my knees. Most freak out a bit, not wanting to do it in the open, and either laugh at me as they leave, or will usher me into a stall to suck them off. The worst was at a rest stop, I was on my knees right in the middle of the restroom SUCKing a guy off, Some one walked in and I heard them say something in disgust and leave, I was about to jump to my feet, Guy said fuck that, you finish what you started and fucked my face. Right as he came a janitor there walked in yelling at us telling us he was gonna call the cops. I got to my feet and quickly walked out passed him as i was swallowing the mans load.

Tried cages a handful of times, but found them uncomfortable in one way or another, and I have no self control, and I am a chronic masturbator, so I never had them on long at all. Having said that, I have always had a somewhat similar fantasy, That a "spell" be put on me, that shrunk my penis to 1" or less, completely limp and cant get hard at ALL. And that I cant get hard, or cum, until I had swallowed a certain number of loads. Or even better, that I still cant get hard, but upon swallowing that last load it makes me cum hands free.

When I had a DOM that was arranging groups to fuck me, I learned to have a towel in my vehicle, so that I didnt get my seat soaked with cum as my wrecked hole leaking cum on the drive home.

Went to a local park cruising spot the other night to suck a guy off from Grindr. I got there early, and there were 3 used condoms laying on a block wall. As soon as I saw them I shivered and let out a whimper. I was both turned on seeing them there, but also a bit upset and disturbed knowing what it meant. Like I was literally under a spell, I picked them up one by one. Ran my fingers down them squeezing the cum into my mouth as sucked it out. Stale cum. Very pungent. All I could think about was how disgusting I was, how nasty these old loads were, as I uncontrollably swallowed them down. This is not the first time I have done this, far from it, but every time, I cant wrap my head about the lack of control I have when I find them. I LOVE cum, dont get me wrong, LOVE it. But this is old nasty stale cum. Im sorry if that grosses you out, I am just trying to put into words how it effects me, the lack of control, the disbelief. Just a couple minutes after I swallowed the 3rd and last load, the guy showed up. I was so far into sub head space before he even got there, I was an Eager Obedient cocksucker for him.

Ive been taking the Zinc adn Pygeum about 3 weeks now. Precum seems to be the same, my loads might be sliiiiiightly larger, but really not noticing a difference yet 😕

I have quite a few but I guess one of my main ones would be hooking up with an older extremely dominant black man. For him to start using me on a regular basis at least a couple times a week introducing me to more and more Kink and more and more rough sex. Eventually putting me in extreme bondage well I'm used. Them one day while I am helpless and in bondage he has at least five of his black buddies over to use me also. After that night it turns into a regular thing where I am gang fucked at least once a week why these men. They are all very dominant rough black men maybe some sort of gang members. Maybe he has guys he knows straight out of prison that are pent up and need a hole to use. I want to be a white boy faggot snow bunny. My other main fantasy involves hooking up with an older very dominant very kinky farmer. Probably can't mention the rest of that fantasy here so use your imagination.

No suggestions?

Thanks for the input guys, I think I am going to try taking Zinc and Pygeum to start and see how it goes.

I am looking for some good websites for hardcore armature bondage photos. Especially of younger twinks in bondage.

Some of you may have seen some of my other posts talking about how I eat my own cum all the time. Well this time around I started saving it, I had about 35 loads saved in the freezer, then thawed them out and drank them down. I made another post asking if anyone had any recommendations for making my loads bigger, never got any replies 😞 Yellow container is one of two I had saved, glass is them combined and thawed.

I just recently took a two-week work trip / vacation. I have been with a dominant man for quite a while now that uses me on a regular basis. It's common on the weekends for two or four of his buddies we also. He told me since I was going to be gone for so long that I need to make it up for him by doing task for him while I was gone. First of which was to suck off at least 10 random men. I got eight. I had two no-shows. He said I also had to suck off at least one trucker. I got lucky this trip and sucked off three. He also had me stop at three different. I have no idea if you knew these men or if she just found them by placing an online ad. Or what. 03 put me in bondage. Which I am always in anytime I'm with my sister. The first man just tied my hands behind my back and tide my ankles together. Used both my holes a short while dump the load in me untied me and told me to get out. Second man tied me spread eagle on my stomach on his bed. He then worked several large holes into my ass. Then left a large butt plug in me while he left the room. About 20 minutes later he came back with two other men all dumped a load in me. The third guy had a room set up in his basement sex swing bondage equipment toys you name it. I spent most of the night at his place being used for several hours. A little bit of cbt, a lot of ass play. Nipple clamps left on me so long my nipples are still bruised and sore. After he dumped several loads in me he popped a medium sized butt plug in my ass and told me that my master said that It was to stay in my ass until I got back to him. I will be going over to my master's house tomorrow. He said I will be making it up to him for being gone so long. He said he invited every cock I've ever taken for him over for the weekend. I am both excited and wondering just how many that could be. He has had many random men over his place over the last year to use me. This whole experience has just put me in my place over and over again as nothing but a couple holes to be used for cock. I can't escape it

I saved up 30 to 33 loads, lost count 😞 Thawed them out and drank them down, wasnt NEARLY enough, since my loads arent that bog 😞 It makes me want to see if I can gain access to more save cum, of any kind, somehow.

Are there any vitamins or certain foods I can eat to increase my load size? I dont care about sperm count, just a bigger load. Why you ask? If you have seen my other posts on here, its obvious I am a cum addict. I eat mine constantly, and have got in the habit of now saving my loads and freezing them until I have at least 30 loads, then I drink them. But I dont have very big loads, so its frustrating that I still dont end up with the volume I want. So yes, I want my loads to be larger, just to eat them. If anyone else is into cum collecting, or knows other ways of getting large amount of saved cum, I would love to chat with you.

Well let me put it this way, I have jerked off many times JUST so I could eat my cum. I am now in the habit of collecting my cum, freezing it in a container, and once I have at least 30 loads saved, I drink it. Anyone have any tips for vitamins, or foods, to make my loads larger?

mmmmmmmmmm far right flesh colored one, i need that rearranging my second ring!