Fill out your BBRT profile!

[sportsfan]

It really gets on my nerves to see so many "Ask Me" in a bbrt profile. BBRT is not a looking for a boyfriend site, it is a hookup site. BBRT isnt' the type of site that a typical 25 year old gay guy who only plays safe and never hooks up is going to register on just to see who's on there.

Too many Ask Mes just drive me crazy!

[rawTOP]

I interpret Ask Me as either poz or "don't ask me".

[Belfast-Bottom]

I agree. Years of experience have taught me that guys who don't have photos or stats are almost always flakes. They are just on the sites to wank. They have ZERO interest in meeting.

[sportsfan]

In the Status section, I also interpret ask me as Poz. But for smoking? Taking loads?

[Belfast-Bottom]

To avoid misunderstanding: I was replying to sportsfan's post.

[pozpowerbtm]

I understand why guys do it, a lot of poz guys don't feel comfortable fucking neg guys so a lot of neg guys put 'ask me' so the top feels more comfortable as status doesn't have to be asked

[Ingulphus]

"Ask Me"s are the kiss of death for me, especially if that's their response to drug usage. I can see someone using it to be coy about serostatus, but even that smacks of dishonesty.

[bearbandit]

I've got two "ask me"s on my profile: one is for body hair - it's fine and blond, so you don't really notice it, but someone might just have decided to shave it off anyway. The other, I'm afraid, is drug use: some drugs I'm okay about, some I'm not, so "ask me" is the only reasonable answer for me.

[bigdick4you]

i ignore people who have all of ask me on their profiles... the only acceptable one is that of status as it only concerns the people i hook up with...its not true that it is just a hook up site... have had few romances with guys and some others became really good friend... but mostly its for uncomplicated sex of course...

[Inception]

I have never met anyone on hook up sites. My profiles probably look like a flake's. It's just easier to cruise people in real life, whether at baths or parks, or just walking down the street in the gay ghetto. The other night I saw this guy I recognized while walking downtown and he got this pissed off look when he saw me. I suddenly realized he had just left the tubs and knew I was heading there, and was cursing himself that he had checked out too early before getting to ride me again.

[PhoenixGeoff]

I interpret Ask Me as either poz or "don't ask me".

This is true if it's the only "Ask Me" in a profile (or one of only two or three). The profiles that piss me off are the ones that have "Ask Me" for everything.

To what sportsfan said, I'd also add that this is freaking 2012. There are digital cameras everywhere. There are privacy controls on the site. There is absolutely no excuse whatsoever not to have pictures on your profile.

[layedback]

"Ask Me"s are the kiss of death for me, especially if that's their response to drug usage. I can see someone using it to be coy about serostatus, but even that smacks of dishonesty.

That's your prerogative , but consider this. My work involves government contracts, which means we have random drug screens often, and anyone who fails is automatically terminated, regardless of the reason. So, I almost never do any drugs. Maybe once every 5 years, after I've been recently tapped for a screening, I might smoke a joint. Otherwise, I'm completely drug free. So, when I answer the drug question in a stats form, what should I select? If I say "no", technically I'm lying because I will partake of something mild on very rare occasions. If I answer "yes", some might dismiss me entirely because they think I'm a tweaked out addict. If I'm forced to select something, I answer "ask me" because I feel that my situation bears a more detailed explanation. Before people start judging others and deciding what has no excuse, maybe they should stop and consider that not everything in this world is black and white and can be answered definitively with one choice.

Also, the "hookup" versus "relationship" argument cuts both ways. If you're only interested in a hookup, then why does someone's answers to personal questions matter to you?

Really, why get so bent out of shape over profiles of people you don't know and don't want to know? Life's too short for that. Just relax and move on.

[RawPozLust]

Maybe it would be better if the questions had more answers or "decline to say" as options. (Frankly, my relationship status is nobody's business, since I'm just looking for a fuck, not a commitment.) But I agree that too many "ask me" answers in a profile is a turnoff.

[POZ-friendlybtm]

So, too, alas, is a 'positive okay' placed under 'your status' by a neg guy - at least for many poz guys!

[PhoenixGeoff]

So, I almost never do any drugs. Maybe once every 5 years, after I've been recently tapped for a screening, I might smoke a joint. Otherwise, I'm completely drug free.

In your situation, I'd probably choose either "You Can" or "No" instead of "Ask Me". Realistically, you're almost certainly not going to be doing anything with most of your BBRT hookups.

Most people also seem to treat pot differently from other drugs. A lot of profiles will specify that they don't object to partners smoking weed, but don't want to be around anyone doing anything harder. Maybe having a separate category for pot smoking on the profile would be a good idea, especially since it's semi-legal in a lot of states like California, Washington and Colorado.