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Am I truly versatile or just schizophrenic?


bonsaisai

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I'm an Asian living in America and to truly conform to the stereotype, I used to bottom in my 20s. The experience was OK, never great. Physically it mostly hurt and was sometimes pleasurable. Mentally it was more fun being a bottom. But things changed the moment I discovered how pleasurable it was to top bareback. It was like "I never got the memo on this." The excitement, the fear, the nerves all melted into an unforgettable experience. Since then I became truly versatile leaning toward topping more (with or without condoms) now that I'm in my 30s.

But I can't be both top and bottom with the same person in the same setting. Only one thing at a time, as if the moment I see or talk to a guy, a switch has been turned on, dependent on how he looks and acts.

I'm a small guy (5'3" 110 lbs) so most of the time people naturally assume that I'm a bottom, even though I'm straight acting. I tend to bottom for guys who are taller and bigger than me, which most of American guys are, unless I travel outside the US and to Asian countries. There, with Asian guys who are either the same size as me or smaller, I feel much more comfortable being a top.

Sometimes I can't decide what I like more. Am I just schizophrenic when it comes to sex? :)

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The only people you have to satisfy in this regard are yourself and the guy you're with. I usually top, but sometimes, something in my head says, "Yeah, I want that guy's dick in my ass." And a lot of times in happens when a guy proves he's not wedded to stereotypes. But it's not like there's a cosmic balance that gets all out of whack because you don't always play the same role.

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Go with it, I'm versatile too, but most guys think I'm a top (I'm a big guy with a big cock) so unfortunately I don't get a lot of cock in my ass since most guys seem not to be into flip fucking. Get in the mood to flip fuck and give it a try, nothing hotter than 2 guys trading off and fucking the hell out of each other in the same session (a group of versatile guys going at it in an orgy is even better). The best fucks, top or bottom are from versatile guys, you will very rarely find a versatile guy that insists on fucking in a position that is uncomfortable for either partner, but it is extremely common for total tops and bottoms.

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Do what you enjoy most and don't worry about it. If you like to top, then let the guys know you want to top. I'm a versatile top but often love to just flip back and forth or take pot luck and do what ever the guy I'm with wants to do....its all good as long as someone is getting fucked.:)

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  • 2 weeks later...

"its all good as long as someone is getting fucked" -- I like that.

Do what you enjoy most and don't worry about it. If you like to top, then let the guys know you want to top. I'm a versatile top but often love to just flip back and forth or take pot luck and do what ever the guy I'm with wants to do....its all good as long as someone is getting fucked.:)
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I agree with what you said about versatile guys giving the best fucks. They've walked in your shoes before and they know that it takes to give pleasure.

Not sure about flip flopping in one session with the same guy. Once I size up a guy, I'll determine to bottom for him or top him and that'll be it for him. I can't change my mind. Doing otherwise is a bit schizophrenic.

Go with it, I'm versatile too, but most guys think I'm a top (I'm a big guy with a big cock) so unfortunately I don't get a lot of cock in my ass since most guys seem not to be into flip fucking. Get in the mood to flip fuck and give it a try, nothing hotter than 2 guys trading off and fucking the hell out of each other in the same session (a group of versatile guys going at it in an orgy is even better). The best fucks, top or bottom are from versatile guys, you will very rarely find a versatile guy that insists on fucking in a position that is uncomfortable for either partner, but it is extremely common for total tops and bottoms.
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Me too. It's just that I can't flip flop with the same guy in the same session. I can be either top or bottom for him, depending on how he looks. I'm a little Asian guy so when I meet somebody my size or smaller, he brings out the top in me.

Think you're just versatile, for me it always depends on my mood and the other guy. Some days I only want to bottom, then the next I want to top and then the next I want both. That's the best thing about being vers, it's unpredictable
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Guest JizzDumpWI

You're most likely versatile. My own journey has ebbed and flowed in this regard. In recent years, especially with more chronic ED, I just bottom. But still from time to time there is nothing like loading up on the big V and fucking a willing bottom.

Bottom line (every pun intended) our sex life is in my opinion an evolution. We're human and multidimensional; so evolution of our sex play makes good sense doesn't it?

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Yes, the reasons are always complicated. Medical problems definitely play a role or restricts one's role.

How many guys who switch to topping because they can't take dicks in their asses?

You're most likely versatile. My own journey has ebbed and flowed in this regard. In recent years, especially with more chronic ED, I just bottom. But still from time to time there is nothing like loading up on the big V and fucking a willing bottom.

Bottom line (every pun intended) our sex life is in my opinion an evolution. We're human and multidimensional; so evolution of our sex play makes good sense doesn't it?

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