Dirty Bottoms Etiquette Question From A Top?

[BBRob]

I have a question for the bottoms, out there, I am a bareback top, this hasn't happened to me a huge amount of times, but enough. Lately, I've had a string of bad luck, where I will fuck a bottom who claims to be very experienced & hungry for my cock & cum, but I get shit on my dick. I had been talking to a guy for 2 days now, & we planned to meet up today, for me to breed him. I went over & we did the deed, all was well, until I pulled out. My dick was smelly & shitty. He acted like it was no big deal. I tried to be casual about it, but dirty bottoms turn me totally off, instantly, I hate the smell & seeing shit on my dick. The guy told me how fun it was for him, I tried to play it cool but I just wanted to get out of there as fast as possible & take a hot shower and rinse off the smell. I couldn't fake how turned off I was, I just played it polite and got out of there as fast as I could. I am as kinky as anyone, but shitty holes are the one thing I can't stand! Yuck. I know accidents happen, but sheesh, when a bottom has time to prepare, shouldn't he be prepared? This has happened to me several times this past year. And each time, the bottom seemed to be very experienced, older, they ones you'd think would be the most conscientious about making sure their hole is clean.

Here's my question. Since this has happened so much, should I actually start asking bottoms if they are clean first? I always assumed it was common courtesy for them to know to be clean before being fucked. But maybe some actually have to be asked? I've fucked some really good bottoms before, and they always are clean as a whistle and know to be fresh & ready for cum. The only thing I want in a hole when I fuck it is maybe another load, but definately not shit!

How should I handle this from now on, should I ask every bottom before I fuck them if they are clean? Or is it the bottom's job to be clean? Just tired of fucking guys and getting shitty dicks it really makes what would have been an otherwise hot encounter bad. And once I fuck a guy and get shit on my dick, I can't get past it, I could never fuck the same guy again.

[rawTOP]

Some bottoms are just more casual about shit than others. The generation of gay guys who are now in their 80s used to call fucking "browning" because in the 50s and 60s gay sex wasn't quite the art form it is today. It's not like you had your options of places where you could buy the latest in douching equipment.

I know if a bottom is coming from work, I always ask how they're going to clean out before coming over. I don't need details - just have them say enough that I know they've considered the issue and are dealing with it. And lately when I'm making arrangements I say "are you cleaned out and ready to go?" That kills two birds with one stone - 1) how long will it be until you leave, and 2) you've cleaned out, right?

But at the end of the day shit happens. It shouldn't happen too often but it'll happen sometimes. The problem is when you're in an area where guys just aren't all that bothered by shit. My impression is that that happens more often in rural areas when straight guys are involved, etc.

[AnonBBottom]

I'm a total bottom, and have never minded when guys ask me if I'm cleaned out. I usually have a pretty rigorous ritual to making sure I'm ready for the guys cock and cum, including douching. Only once in a great while, if the encounter is sudden and unexpected, I may not have time to douch, but definitely will do my best to clean.

Go ahead and ask!

[totalasspig]

BBRob, being a highly experienced bottom like me, I MUST have a clean ass (Basement) to present to the top. I want his load(s) and I want them deep in my ass and even lick his dick when I'm done, or have him fist the loads deep inside my hole. When I do have sex, it's in the morning at the gym or some other location or later at night, I will make sure that I stop to take a few more clean outs. If I have a set date, I do a very deep cleaning (three times) the night before and another one in the morning and my hole is usually in excellent condition. If I go the baths, I arrive with a clean hole and do a touch up. As Rawtop did say "Shit Happens" and yes, some shit has come out of my hole here and there but I will say 99 percent of the time that my ass is so clean that the ass juices on a tops cock taste really good after he has fucked me, and some tops that are into rimming love eating my ass juice from a clean hole.

[BBRob]

I guess I will have to start asking them up front if they are cleaned out & ready to go, keeps it short & sweet & lets them know, like Rawtop suggests. I've always hated to ask so firmly because It's not exactly the most tactful question, I do live in a Southern state, but a city where there is a HUGE number of gays, so that shouldn't be the issue. From now on, I'm just going to ask them before I do anything with them, to get it out of the way. I'm just tired of it happening, it ruins it for me. Luckily hasn't happened too much but for some reason this year it's happened time & time again. Bottoms should be very conscientious about cleaning out if they think they're going to get fucked, common courtesy

[bearbandit]

In the UK in the late seventies, we considered it something that just happened sometimes. But times change, and what was acceptable is no longer acceptable. I remember times of fucking someone, realising that there's shit everywhere, and then just carrying on, something which few would accept today. Make enforcing a cleaning out ritual on your next fuck part of the fuck, even if there are hours between the cleaning and the fuck. Keeps him focussed...

I still rely on my pig out on miwsli and other high fibre stuff the day before then fasting on the day itself (with maybe some imodium), but obviously this isn't a healthy diet in the long run...

[barefootbob]

I am a bottom and it depends on the timing. Sometimes a spontaneous hookup happens, a top I hook with sometimes will call me just as I am leaving work and wants me over pronto (opposite direction from my house). I don't have time to clean out, he knows this and is isn't a big deal. That said, if I know the hook up time is later, then I have time to prepare. Generally the spontaneous hook ups are not all that frequent so clean out time is given.

[rawmikeshaw]

Like someone said above, if I even think there's a possibility I'll be fucked, I do my best to be as clean as possible. It's as embarrassing and disgusting to me as to the top, I think, if things don't turn out well.

On the other hand, I was in a monogamous relationship for 8 years, and we'd flip fuck several nights a week (although I was bottom more often than he was). There might have been an occasional mess but I don't recall it being a big deal in terms of frequency. Sometimes when we knew we were up for a big night of fucking I'd douche and he might even shave my ass but it was almost never messy. Don't know if that had to do with the fact that we were in our 20's at the time, or if it was something about our diet, or what.

But I'm with you on the fact that it's not good etiquette at the very least. And as a bottom, I wouldn't be offended if the top guy said something ahead of time about cleanliness. As long as there's the understanding that (as you said) accidents do sometimes happen.

[anicker834]

Give me a break if a guys really wants ass he takes it cleaned out or not.

[BBRob]

Like, the guy I met today had 2 days to plan for this, so I don't get why he was so dirty. It's SO awkward when it happens. He seemed to play it down, like it was casual, but it's disgusting to me he had plenty of time to prepare & claimed he wanted my dick bad, and knew how hung I am. I know stuff happens but he had 2 days to prepare. Basically all I could do was make awkward small talk & hurry out of there & take some hot showers.

One thing I wonder too is, I am poz, but is the risk of catching something else greater when a bottom is dirty? I worry about that sometimes, I def don't want any stds.

It was SO embarrassing & awkward, I mean, what is there to say when you pull out & there's a terrible smell & your dick is covered in shit. Like I said I am a pretty laid back guy & into quite a few stuff but just not shit, I like to fuck an ass like a pussy, so expect it to be clean. The guy emailed me telling me how great it was, etc etc how he wants to do it again, but sorry I can't meet a guy ever again after I get shit all over myself like that it's just a turn off.

From now on I'm going to ask them if they are cleaned out & ready, up front, before any fucking.

[rawTOP]

Give me a break if a guys really wants ass he takes it cleaned out or not.

Not at all true. My dick goes limp and things are just over if there's significant shit.

[totalasspig]

I don't think so, I know that If I am topping and there is shit my dick goes limp, and if I am bottoming and smelling shit I ask the guy to stop (if he wants to) so I can take care of it Immediately.

Give me a break if a guys really wants ass he takes it cleaned out or not.

[GreenChaser]

Give me a break if a guys really wants ass he takes it cleaned out or not.

Completely wrong dude. more than once i ended a night because the guy was not prepared to btm. gross- a little dirtiness is one thing, and understandable thing, but there is a limit. I have never gone so far as to request a guy give himself an enima, but like i said if it was bad enough i am not shy to say so. i'm awhere that there are guys into that kind of dirty play but i am not among them.

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

A dose of Imodium in that hour before sex can do wonders. Some bottoms over clean, which actually stimulates the bowel. I can't find it offhand, but some months back (last spring or summer) there was a great post with a vid that details how to clean, and how not to clean. On tablet at the moment but when I get back to my dual monitor PC, I will go look for it...

[DarkroomTaker]

In the UK in the late seventies, we considered it something that just happened sometimes. But times change, and what was acceptable is no longer acceptable. I remember times of fucking someone, realising that there's shit everywhere, and then just carrying on, something which few would accept today. Make enforcing a cleaning out ritual on your next fuck part of the fuck, even if there are hours between the cleaning and the fuck.

Exactly ^^^^ no excuse for a dirty ass!

I have been a bottom from a young age and had lots of cock up my ass and never had any accidents or shit on it to date! I am always cleaned out and ready ( just in case of action) If the ass is shitty, tell the owner how disgusted you are and leave. seriously no excuses these days.