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Is "Fag Hag" Meaningless Now That Nearly All Women Are Gay Friendly?


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At least in urban areas it seems pretty much all women are gay friendly. I know "fag hag" means women who like to hang out with gay guys - but it seems that's pretty much all women these days. So does fag hag have any meaning now?

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I live in the south, where the men carry guns and drive pickup trucks, and the women have high hair to be closer to Jesus (though, inexplicably, they also dress like complete sluts at the office). So consider yourself extremely lucky if all the women you know are fag hags. If Sarah Palin gets elected in 2012, you can count that as confirmation that at least 51% of the female population does not qualify as a fag hag. Lucky you. I miss new York.

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I live in the south, where the men carry guns and drive pickup trucks, and the women have high hair to be closer to Jesus (though, inexplicably, they also dress like complete sluts at the office). So consider yourself extremely lucky if all the women you know are fag hags. If Sarah Palin gets elected in 2012, you can count that as confirmation that at least 51% of the female population does not qualify as a fag hag. Lucky you. I miss new York.

But those high-hair Jesus women probably love Ellen DeGeneris... I mean look at Ellen's audience - lots of fat women from middle America - they love her. And on all the reality shows the women have to have "their gays" around - they almost compete to see who can be more gay friendly. But of course those reality shows are shot in or around urban areas.

I hear you though that parts of the country aren't "there" yet - but I'd bet even those areas have seen significant progress over the last 10 years or so. They may not want us to marry, but more of them than you might think would probably say they like us and want us for things like designers.

And Sarah Palin won't get elected in 2012 - at least not for President. If she does, I'm moving to Canada!

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'Fag Hag', for me, connotes an image of an insecure (although almost always really smart/quick-witted.), usually heavy-set woman, with glasses who always complains she can never find a man; and while always seeming to watch your back, was: 1. Trying to convert you to her team, or 2. The cock-blocker when you are trying to chat-up "Mr Right [Now]".

While physical appearance, and level of intelligence may vary from hag to hag, the insecurity, need to convert, and cock-blockage are always part of the persona, thus, they are not a dying breed.

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Amusing description spunxter! I know that earlier gay writers have suggested that Fag Hags are attracted to men but frightened of sex ( specifically penetration ). I have a hetero male friend who finds fear of penetration and physical vaginismus ( wikipedia it people! ) surprisingly common in the women he dates. He does have a big thick cock though. Being a fag hag allows a woman to have a "safe" close male friendship ( romance even ) without the risks of physical intimacy. I think that used to be the motivation for many, although many perhaps feel that they are just too unattractive to catch ( or deserve ) a hetero guy. I don't deride fag hags. Gay people need all the friends we can get.

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I dont know. To me fag hag means just that.........an unattractive fat chick that can't get a man who likes to hang around gay guys for a non-confrontational, non-threatening, relationship. Maybe I'm wrong, but the fag hags in my life have always fit that bill and wanted another "girlfriend" to talk about men they could not have with.

The hot women who hit on me not knowing my sexual preference are another whole breed.

[edit after I re-read a few posts] spunxter hit it pretty good - and yep they like to think someday they'l get you to get smashed and dive into their tuna.

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I once had a very dear friend: "Li" [i'll call her]. My husband at the time called her a "fag hag" because she knew several gay men (associated with a certain church). Not being submersed in the gay movement of the 70s, and the time being well-before Internet [but somewhat after Paul Lynde], Li took great offense. She may or may not have known that some equate "fag hag" with "dumpy woman" - and Li was a bit corpulent.

The hurt was visible for a long time. My husband apologized, but it was never the same friendship.

The term made her think about negative sterotypes, as they related to HER.

And for that reason, I would never use the term "fag hag", any more than I would use a perjorative descriptor for a person/group that I was not sure I was part of.

I can say I'm a fag; but I'll pass on the hag.

peace

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  • 2 years later...

You'd be surprised at the number of women that AREN'T gay-friendly! I live in Texas and there are women here (die-hard, religious, conservative, Republican neophytes) that are very vocal about their distaste for gay men & women. Hell, I have family members and so-called friends that are openly homophobic--they whisper behind my back. There are still women who view homosexuality as a choice. To them, we're all AIDS-carrying, butt-fuckers who deserve everything that we get for not believing in JC.

These are also the same women whose husbands cruise on Adam4Adam under the disguise of being "discreet". Oh, the irony!

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You'd be surprised at the number of women that AREN'T gay-friendly!

Yeah, funny I started this thread. A month or two ago when the Chic-Fil-A thing was happening my sister posted something on Facebook in support of CFA. Long story short that lead to my telling her (privately) that it's really not OK to be a bigot when your brother is gay. I questioned how she could look her brother in the face and say he's not her equal. It gets worse... She's married to a mess of a guy. At one point they told me he was 'bisexual" (but dealing with his temptations). I finally told her the way I see things her husband wasn't allowed to be who he really was. He's got serious medical issues now as a result of decades of repression. Saying their marriage (which is based on a lie of him being heterosexual) is better than my marriage is absurd.

Bottom line. I'm no longer talking to my sister.

Still, so many women are gay friendly - especially ones in their 20s & 30s (my sister is about 55).

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To be honest, I tend to find people being not "gay-friendly" a thing of the past, or at the minimum that everyone is accepting of it, even if they'd rather ignore it, but then I'm in the UK and I'm sure things vary from country to country

Fag hag to me tends to mean women who are more often than not a gay man's friend not because of his personality but because he's gay, so oddly enough I tend to avoid those sorta women

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