losttop Posted August 13, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2015 Touché ! I wouldn't call myself insane...but therapy would most defenitely help.... Maybe I'm following my moms footsteps....she is married to this asshole for over 50 years now...I resent him but I also love him as he is my dad...have a feeling that's what it is...As I seem not to like the nice guys. Sorry to bother u guys with my bs and hope that my future posting will be more upbeat! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NLbear Posted August 13, 2015 Report Share Posted August 13, 2015 Losttop. You posted many issues around your relationship problems. And I don't even know if they are around the same BF or different ones. I assume the same but am not sure. I do admire you for asking for advice here. And I also appreciate the ones who responded, giving you advice. Won't you give it a go at being single for a while? Maybe you are not "husband" material and will be much happier if you live on your own for a while and do your own thing. You're only 46 and although some may consider that "old" I consider that young. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
losttop Posted August 13, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2015 The issues r with same bf...never have had such issues with previous boyfriends like this.... Sometimes I would break up and other times the other one would break up. I'm not looking for a husband...I'm looking for a partner who is the same as me: pretty easy going that enjoys travelling but also enjoys being a pig together. TravelLing the world and meeting other guys for friendship and sex. Someone who is also trustworthy obviously.... Not that this one is not trustworthy....quite on the contrary... I have never caught him on a lie. It just frustrates me that he can be such a pig with others and with me most of the time he is like sexually repressed. And I don't understand why as I like him being a pig with me and others...I could also be selfish and say what the fuck let him use drugs so at least he is always a pig. But would that make me a good bf? In my eyes it wouldn't. Just wish he wouldn't need the drugs to be the person I would like my bf to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cam1972 Posted August 13, 2015 Report Share Posted August 13, 2015 (edited) I just went back and read your posts about your boyfriend. You've asked if he is a bully (established that he is), have stated that your sex life with him is less than desirable and not frequent at all, and.... You have stated that he has not been forthcoming about being online when he actually has been. That's a lie by omission. So.... You HAVE caught him not being truthful. Degrading comments, partying, doesn't want to have sex with you much, not being totally honest with you...... I'm saying this with all the kindness I have within me: I'm sorry but just because your mother stayed with an asshole (your words) doesn't give you an excuse to do so. You say you just wish he wouldn't need drugs to be the person you want him to be... He doesn't need drugs to be a bully, or not have sex with you, or degrade you... So drugs really aren't the issue. HE is. And part of the trouble lies within you. You let him do this. And as long as you let him, you'll be miserable and be right back here posting more about how bad it is to be with your boyfriend. And.. To be honest.. I don't think anyone wants to see that. I just wonder how bad it has to become before you leave. Either you enjoy being miserable or.... You don't get attention from him so you post on here to get attention... Either way, no way to live life. Because eventually, no one is going to pay attention on here either. Losttop, I think you feel you don't deserve better. May even deal with depression... But he's not worth another minute of your time. Do yourself a favor and leave. You are wasting your life away staying with someone who doesn't give two shits about you. You will never look back and say "I wish I would have taken more abuse from him." But you WILL look back and say "I wish I would have left him sooner." He's just too much drama. As someone else said, stop posting and start packing. Please. Edited August 13, 2015 by cam1972 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
einathens Posted August 13, 2015 Report Share Posted August 13, 2015 in theory, you two are perfect for each other. he's a user, you're a use. his drug is meth, yours is pity. he needs group sex, you need group sympathy. I wish your form of masochism was the hot kind, not the boring one. make that "he's a user, you're a usee" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
losttop Posted August 14, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2015 in theory, you two are perfect for each other. he's a user, you're a use. his drug is meth, yours is pity. he needs group sex, you need group sympathy. I wish your form of masochism was the hot kind, not the boring one. make that "he's a user, you're a usee" really? Is that what u get from it? Not looking for sympathy here....just venting my issues and kind of trying to find explanations for his behaviour.... In case u missed it.... I'm into whoring out guys and fuck a lot when I'm on the road for work and at home not so much out of respect for my bf. The only thing that I find frustrating and that should be clear by now...is that he can only be a pig when he uses meth....why do most of my other FBs don't need that? That we r not suited for each other is clear...I'm just rrying to make a bad situation more sustainable....as it's very easy to say break up.... But I do enjoy the lifestyle I'm having now. With other words: I need his money! I'm not a masochist.... U got the picture now sweetheart? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators drscorpio Posted August 14, 2015 Moderators Report Share Posted August 14, 2015 I think the best thing we have heard from you this iteration of your complaints about your partner, losttop, is the mention of therapy. If you think your parents relationship imprinted on you so strongly that you are reenacting their dysfunctional relationship in your own life or even if you just think you might be, a good counselor can help you figure out how to work through that. They could also help you clarify your thoughts about your relationship itself. You should seriously consider giving it a shot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cam1972 Posted August 14, 2015 Report Share Posted August 14, 2015 .just venting my issues and kind of trying to find explanations for his behaviour.... This... This is why guys get frustrated with you. You post as tho you are ASKING FOR ADVICE (emphasis, not yelling), when in truth you are actually just wanting to "vent". By doing so, you waste a lot of guys' time and emotional involvement in your situation. Because you really don't want the advice. It's obvious you don't because you continue on the same (self destructive) path every single time. If you want to vent, vent. But don't post it as asking for advice. Put the subject title "Vent #1,648" or something like that. Then guys will know not to waste their time giving you advice you don't really want. If they want, they can commiserate with you. Others that don't can skip the party. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now