Advice

[breederboy]

Just wanted to give some advice to anyone who needs it or has been there. Never meet a guy from grindr or any of the sites unless you're both crystal clear about what you're looking for/what's going to happen! I was chatting with a guy and he seemed cool, and was cute, and at first seemed sexually interested but then began talking about wanting "friends". I'm cool with friends but for the most part I prefer real friends outside of hookup sites. I don't think one can really mix hookups and friends lol.

 

But anyway, he kept asking me to come hangout with him, and since he was so persistent, I finally agreed, since he started getting pissy. Not sure why though because it's not like we're dating. He seemed more interested in cuddling than fucking.

 

But I went and visited him, and he was a nice enough guy, and good looking, but it was weird, and awkward. I basically just wanted to fuck without much chit chat. But he seemed to just want to sit onthe couch and watch tv while we made EXTREMELY awkward conversation. I wasn't even sure why I was there.

 

I spent 2 hours there just feeling horribly awkward and with him basically letting me do the talking which really was weird. I finally left, it was all very friendly, he said "let's hangout again" but honestly due to how awkward it felt to me I may not again.

 

So word to the wise. Don't meet someone unless both of you know what's going to happen otherwise it will be extremely awkward! Grindr isn't for friends lol, it's for sex. Not sure why guys pretend otherwise.

[NLbear]

Some guys are really looking for other gay friends on those sites. Not just to have sex with them but real new friends. Nothing wrong with that. But yes, if YOU just want a hook up then be clear about it you just want that and nothing more.

[breederboy]

I suppose. I tend to go with my gut and so far haven't met anyone cool who wants to play off Grindr. I'm all about friends but this was just beyond awkward sitting there watching tv. I guess I should have been more upfront with him about what I'm looking for. I did find it a bit weird how he got kind of pissy when I would tell him why I couldn't meet at certain times. Not like I'm dating him or anything. Then when I got there all he did was basically stare at me and look like he was examining something under a microscope. Just felt a weird vibe. He was nice enough but I just felt cornered and uncomfortable.

 

This always seems to happen to me, I'm only looking for hot fun, no drama, and I end up with weird guys who don't seem to know what they want from day to day which confuses me further. I just want a fun guy to chill with and fuck.

[cam1972]

He may have become pissy because he assumed (which isn't a good thing) that you were a flake like most others on Grindr. Obviously you aren't, but that is probably why. As you've discovered, it gets very frustrating having guys act interested and then cancel on you. Never to be seen again. I imagine he has experienced the same thing. As far as what he wants and what you wanted, you just have to be blunt on those apps. Don't assume he is reading your mind. That will help avoid situations like you had. As far as his awkward behavior, I've found that some people just don't know how to communicate. And he may have been very nervous. There could be many reasons why things happened as they did. Including this one: he may have just been weird. Look at it this way: you weren't robbed, you weren't raped, you weren't injured... I'd take a weird personality any day over those. Using apps like Grindr means you have to take chances. Some will be worth it, others will be a waste of time. What chances you take depend on how badly you need a fuck. Just watch out for yourself. No one else will.

[not_sure_bb]

i make my profile on various apps, BRUTALLY obvious what i am looking for and what i am NOT looking for. If youre that stupid to think im looking for friends o any type of relationship, youre too damn stupid to fuck me. but sure as shit, i end up with a stalker at least once a year. Its amazing to me every single time

[breederboy]

What gets me on these sites is how many people seem like they're interested but then just fade away and stop chatting I just don't get that. Either you're interested or not but why waste my time chatting if you really don't intend on meeting up or just stop chatting? What's the point?

 

Last week some guy invited me to a group sex session but stood me up and the door to the hotel room he gave me was locked. And then this guy who said he wanted to arrange a 3way with me did not show up and so I never got to meet the other guy.

 

Seems like excuse after excuse. I could have met a couple other guys but they weren't my type.

 

I met this guy on Grindr and he seemed really weird like he just wanted friends and then I went down and hungout with him and spent 4 boring hours watching tv he did not make a move or anything.

 

I really just want one or two buds I could meet and fuck on a regular basis but that seems to be impossible to find.

 

I'd just like to meet one or two guys I could play with that are actually into me.

[not_sure_bb]

maybe its just me but i also feel like the more talk there is, the less likely of a hookup.

[drscorpio]

maybe its just me but i also feel like the more talk there is, the less likely of a hookup.

That's absolutely true. If you aren't talking where and when within a few messages, it isn't going to happen. 

 

Part of the problem with Grindr is that it is "Gay-by's First Hook-Up App" - lots of guys on there are very experienced. They are overly cautious and often only looking for pics or someone to chat while they wank.