Douching Tips

[Treehugger]

I have encountered several threads on Breedingzone either discussing or asking advice about douching so I decided to throw in my two cents and so I present to you my fellow bottoms...treehugger's guide to douching. Enjoy.
     

Tip No. 1   Know thyself. Being in touch with your body and how it functions in your own personal way is the most important knowledge in getting the most out of your douching routine. What I mean is questions like: How often do you defecate? Are your poos log-like or is it like you just turned on a soft serve machine? How often are you constipated? How long does it take you to push out a loaf? and so on. Understanding how your body operates will give you a better idea of what you need to do to get properly cleaned out.
     For example, if you are often constipated, take a long time to push out a few nuggets or have squishy poos then you are more likely to have a harder time cleaning out properly. This leads me to tip number two.
     

Tip No. 2  A good douche starts with a healthy diet and exercise. Nothing lubes the ole shit chute like fiber and a trot around the block.  Maybe you are that lucky guy that can eat anything under the sun and shit like a champ but chances are you are not. Diets high in animal protein, dairy and sugar can gum up the works making it harder for a quick douche to do a proper job.
     Cutting down on meat, dairy and sugar then upping your veg intake can move things along quite nicely.  Also remember to hydrate properly especially if you consume alcohol. Consider taking a daily fiber supplement of some kind. And I do mean daily! To be a good bottom you need to be ready to take a load at all times. If you manage things properly you might get away with a quick douche before your next hookup gets to your door.

Tip No. 3 Explore and experiment. First of all stick a couple fingers up your ass and feel around. Get to know what your are dealing with. Seriously, do it! Here's why. I have a problem with water getting trapped by my second ring. Not such a big deal if its clean but I'd rather not take any chances so sometimes I have to go knuckle deep, nudge that second ring and see if the pipes are dry.
     Try different types of douching equipment. I do like the shower wands but they can take some getting used to especially when trying to determine the best water pressure.  I find I can get too much water too deep in my gut then it takes hours for all that dirty water to make its way back out. Depending on what type of encounter you are expecting you might not need to get that clean. Again it depends on how your body functions. If you are a reasonably heathy guy who isn't preparing for a gangbang you only need to clean out so many inches of your intestines for a stink free fuck.
     I have not tried the enema bags so not sure how well those work. I have an enema ball that is small enough to travel and big enough to get the job done. I've had the same one for 20 years. As big a 'ho as I am I still have not managed to wear it out.
     I recently tried a bidet wand that attached to the toilet and loved it. Worked perfectly for a quick douche and you can do it right over the toilet. It was a little awkward at first but once I got the hang of it was great.

Tip No. 4  Start early with your douching routine. Of course this is not always an option but if you have a fuck planned it doesn't hurt to get the ball rolling early on. Even if my fuck is hours away I like to start douching so by the time its showtime I can be confident I am clean. I shoot some water in my hole, evacuate and then go on with my day, doing it again a half hour later and so on.
     If I plan on going to a fuck party, the bathhouse or a bookstore I might even start the day or night before. Fasting is a great way to have less to flush out. I am a champion at fasting so I can even not eat for a couple days before the event and have a much easier time cleaning out. Of course I hydrate and drink broth while fasting to keep up my energy. Sometimes I do a flush the night before by drinking a few glasses of prune juice.  I happen to like the taste of prune juice and it works great for me at moving things along.

Tip No. 5  Use lube when douching. You may not need to do this especially if your douching is a quick and easy operation. But if you are having trouble getting clean and have to insert over and over again that could lead to soreness and discomfort. I know it does for me. When I just can not seem to get clean and I am on my umpteenth ball of warm water my hole can get a little tender. As much dick as I have had over the years you would think it would not be so but alas my rosebud is apparently as delicate as the morning dew and lube is an essential component of my douching routine. 
     

     Well that is all I have. Let men know if I left out anything. I am sure I will have an opinion on it. Lastly I would like to go on a small rant and mention how difficult we bottoms sometimes have it. I have been to 14 different bathhouses throughout the USA and I have to say most of them have shitty (no pun intended) facilities for cleaning out. What a fucking pain it is to have to carry enough bottled water into a stall to clean out properly when there is no dedicated space to douche. Just sayin.
     Tops are so fucking lucky! I know, boo-hoo. 

[BootmanLA]

23 hours ago, Treehugger said:

Lastly I would like to go on a small rant and mention how difficult we bottoms sometimes have it. I have been to 14 different bathhouses throughout the USA and I have to say most of them have shitty (no pun intended) facilities for cleaning out. What a fucking pain it is to have to carry enough bottled water into a stall to clean out properly when there is no dedicated space to douche. Just sayin.
     Tops are so fucking lucky! I know, boo-hoo. 

I found most of your tips and suggestions well thought through. But this last small rant - well, it strikes me kind of like complaining that restaurants don't have showers so you can wash your work sweat off before eating.

Seems to me if you're going to a bathhouse, you ought to take care of things like cleaning out before you leave home. I can't imagine something that I'd find less appealing in a bathhouse than going to the bathroom to relieve myself and hearing (or worse, seeing) someone flushing shit out of his ass because he wasn't prepared when he arrived.

[Treehugger]

14 minutes ago, BootmanLA said:

I found most of your tips and suggestions well thought through. But this last small rant - well, it strikes me kind of like complaining that restaurants don't have showers so you can wash your work sweat off before eating.

Seems to me if you're going to a bathhouse, you ought to take care of things like cleaning out before you leave home. I can't imagine something that I'd find less appealing in a bathhouse than going to the bathroom to relieve myself and hearing (or worse, seeing) someone flushing shit out of his ass because he wasn't prepared when he arrived.

If I sounded like I was complaining it is because I was. Ideally I would prefer the comfort and privacy of my home to dredge the funk out of my pipes but that is not always an option. A lot of bottoms are rural meaning they drive a long ways to get some dick. The closest bathhouse to me is over 2 hours away so even if I douche before I leave there is no guarantee I will be fresh when I get there. I always do another douche when I arrive.

     Plus there are bottoms who live with family and roommates.  It is not fun trying to douche on the down low while Grandpa is banging on the door because the chili went right through him. Try explaining to your roommate or nosey sister why you have been in the bathroom for the last two hours and have flushed the toilet 13 times. 

     Then there is the timing factor. Back when the The Club New Orleans was in operation a room rental was for 12 hours and you bet I stayed the whole time to get as much dick as I could.  At some point in those 12 hours I probably had to douche again. Lastly no matter how well you think you have douched accidents happen. I think I am totally clean then the top informs me otherwise. I am not driving home for a enema.

     I agree with you, I don't want to hear or smell the competition, I mean other bottoms, cleaning their asses.  That is why I appreciate bathhouses that accommodate bottoms with douching booths. Club Z in Seattle has a dedicated douching booth that is private and much appreciated. Thanks for reading my post BootmanLA. I hope this explanation makes my rant sound a little more reasonable.

[BootmanLA]

As a concept, sure, I agree, it would be nice if every place that allowed sex on the premises had prep space. But it's not practical (nine square feet set aside for a minimal douching booth is nine square feet that can't be used for people actively having sex, which means you've got to have a bigger facility or limit the number of people you can have in at one time. I realize a few guys, one way or the other, won't make a profit or loss flip, but there's an optimum amount of space to be provided for any given number of guys who are there to play.

Secondly, you're talking plumbing, and more especially, plumbing designed to handle feces, meaning plumbing that may get clogged easily. Or that a patron may use and just not bother cleaning behind himself, which means an employee has to then go behind when it's reported and clean someone's shit up and then render the space usable again.

In other words, while I see the utility, I can also see how it could be a potential nightmare to deal with. I'm not sure how the Seattle facility solves those problems, or maybe Seattle people are just more polite, but given the number of assholes who've left bathrooms I've gone into filthy and stinky, I'd say that would be something most places couldn't count on.

[HelpWhoreMeOut]

Treehugger I totally see where youre coming from. Steamworks in Toronto has it. And exactly right with all the examples, many have happened to me.

Theres a lot of times where you arent planning and then get horny and then decide ur gonna go to a sauna or whatever and if ur not at home and live by yourself what r u gonna do. I remember once going to one and thought i was clean but as you said sometimes surprises happen..

I got to the sauna and this really hot guy wanted to fuck me. I told him to wait. I checked with a toy to check and wasnt clean. I had to lie saying i wasnt feeling well and left. Ya it would have still been awkward saying i had to go clean out but at least I could have.

 

Most tops will just never understand. I really truly do think about this quite a bit. Im not someone that can just be ready on a whim and havent mastered a douching method that works. I do suffer from constipation big time so thats #1 to work on. But constipation is a very common problem idk how most bottoms do it.