Introducing myself

[maximum35]

There is no denying it, i'm most definately a closet case. For years i've been reading stories on here and it's almost become an obsession (35 years old) but i've never been able to act on it (circumstance). I'd love it all for my first time, multiple guys, chem, bareback, but I also know it wont happen unless someone takes control and orders me to do it. I'm in one of those situations whereby I have to control EVERYTHING and as a result, i'm yearning to give up that control. Any advice appreciated. 

[drscorpio]

I don't mean this in a hostile way, but my advice is therapy. Your need to control has left you a virgin at 35. Please get some help before you waste the rest of your life. 

[blackrobe]

In my experience, there are some number of men who feel as the OP does, and are looking to put the choice in someone else's hands to avoid taking responsibility for it themselves.

Often it's paralyzing fear or shame that locks people into inaction. It can also be a form of denial, avoiding acknowledging their nature. Having someone else push them over the line they are afraid of crossing themselves.